


Offer Me a Soul.

by average_writer



Series: Offer Me a Soul [1]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Cute, F/M, Father-Daughter Relationship, Fluff, Friendship, Happy Spencer Reid, Light Dom/sub, Meet-Cute, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Motherhood, Not Beta Read, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Parental Spencer Reid, Parenthood, Pregnancy, Smut, Spencer Reid is a good dad, Sweet, Tags May Change, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, girly reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2020-10-02
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:35:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 56
Words: 150,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25236277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/average_writer/pseuds/average_writer
Summary: There were many things (y/n) liked about her teaching job. Meeting Dr Spencer Reid had to be on the top three.
Relationships: Jennifer "JJ" Jareau/William LaMontagne Jr., Spencer Reid/Reader
Series: Offer Me a Soul [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1951306
Comments: 261
Kudos: 480





	1. Chapter 1

There were many things I liked about working as a teacher in a private school on Washington D.C.. There were bad things of course, but in most cases the bad things were severely overweight by the good things. Maybe it had everything to do with my glittering optimism. At the end of the day that was the word most of my friends would use to describe me. The exclusivity of the job was one of the main things. Working in DC meant working in an environment with some important people. In the three years of teaching I had taught sons and daughters of very prominent people. From important government employees to socialite, if anything the paycheck reflected that status. As I sat cross legged on a chair designed for kids I saw around me, the classroom full of minds mirroring the brightness of the parents. 

I was congratulating one of the boys about their drawing when the phone rang. 

“Emmy is ready to go home”, you heard Lilian, the secretary say.

“I’ll be right out”, I smiled, standing up and looking around the room. My eyes met with the girl, who was busy watching some roses that had turned blue from the dye in the water.  
“Emmy your dad is here”, I announced, flattening my skirt and walking towards her. I smiled and patted Jason’s shoulder. That was another part I liked, every teacher had an assistant at all times.

“Can I take one?”, She asked, “Please Miss”, she added, her smile only growing when she saw mine.

“Of course dear”, I said, picking one of the flowers with a tissue.

I walked next to her, carrying her pink backpack until we were in the front desk.

“Daddy”, I let her break my hold when her dad was in front of us. 

“Mr. Williams”, I smiled. Mr Williams was a silver fox, no really. The man was loaded, he worked in analytics for the white house. He had a very athletic body for his age, he was quick on his feet and funny. With the only slight problem of divorcing what seemed to be every other weekend. He loved his daughter very much though, doing his best to pick her up as often as he could, and being overall involved in her education. 

That was another thing I liked about the job. I didn’t like gossip, but I got to know some of the secrets that most people like him kept hidden. It was like being part of their lives without them knowing.

“Ms (y/l/n) radiant as always”, he said eyeing me, the approach that he took every time to try and convince me to have dinner with him. I held my hands behind me, as his eyes traveled through my body. I was wearing a light gray sweater tucked into a pastel pink A line skirt. The skirt had a small bow right in front of it. Even when the skirt ended on my knees I couldn’t help but feel slightly exposed. 

“Here sweetie”, I said giving Emmy the flower.

“Thank you Miss”, the kid smiled brightly. 

“It’s very nice seeing you”, my smile was sincere as my eyes met him again, I handed him the backpack. “Homework is in the yellow folder as always, if you have any questions you know where to contact me.”

Mr Williams smile became playful, though mine kept the same. I knew he probably would call me even if he had no questions, and I would decline any offer he had for me. It isn’t that he wasn’t my type, it had everything to do with the fact that I couldn’t do that to any of my babies. Those kids were my life, and I was not to mess with their dynamics.

“Of course”, he nodded. “Ready to go home princess?”, he asked now looking down to his daughter.

“Yes”, she exclaimed excited as she jumped in his arms. I waved goodbye as I spun on my heels to go back to the classroom. 

“That can’t be right is L-a-m-o-n-t-a-g-n-e, Henry Lamontagne”, The man across the desk from Lilian said, I eyed him as I stood closer to her.

Exhausted, that’s how he looked, his curly long hair unkempt and falling on his face. His clothes seemed to not have been ironed, although he was wearing a vest and a tie. He was tall and skinny. His fingers fidgeting as he leaned on the desk. The bags around his eyes just seemed to be another accessory that yelled crazy around him. 

“Everything okay?”, I asked, as I approached Lilian, putting my hand on her shoulder. I felt her tension under my palm.

“Yeah, I’m here for Henry Lamontagne, I’m Dr. Spencer Reid his Godfather, I’m supposed to take him home today?”, he said, the words coming fast from his mouth.

“I don’t see your name here Sir, I’m sorry”, Lilian typed again on her computer, as I eyed the pictures of the people on the screen.

“We would need to have you on our database to be able to release any student”, That is when his eyes met me. His body shifting just slightly as he eyed me up and down. I crossed my arms behind me again, something I found myself doing when I was nervous.

“You must be Miss (y/ln)”, he narrowed his eyes as my body tensed. “I work with Jennifer Jareau, I’m FBI.” 

He scrambled for his wallet flashing his credentials.

“Dr. Reid right?”, I asked reading his name from his batch. I knew Jennifer Jareau was part of the FBI, she and her husband were probably my favorite parents. There were always sweet and involved, I also had met Penélope Garcia. She was Henry’s Godmother, an amazing woman who always complimented your outfits. The man behind the counter? I had never seen. “I hope you can understand we cannot release any student without approval from the parents”, I said again.

“Yeah, and I know, actually the security system of the place is amazing”, I quickly put my hand down on the desk, directly underneath was the panic button. “Look”, he said as soon as he saw me, “You can call her right? she can send anything I need to take him?”, I nodded my hand retracting slowly from the desk.

There was something about his eyes that didn’t seem to scream psychopath. There was also a very legit looking badge, but nowadays anything can look legit. 

“I’ll be right back”, I said as I walked to the teacher’s lounge. I searched in my contacts before dialing.

“This is Agent Jennifer Jareau”, A familiar voice came through the phone.

“Hello Ms Jareau, this is Ms (y/n,l/n) from The Learning Tree school”

“(y/n)”, she said in recognition, “Everything okay?”, she asked now, her voice with a hint of worry.

“Yes, we just have a man here, by the name of Spencer Reid. He says he is Henry’s Godfather but we can’t seem to find him on our data”, I fidgeted with the hem of my skirt. Hoping her reaction would not be to tell me to call the cops.

“Spence!”, She said surprised, “Please don’t tell me Bill forgot to add him to the list”, Her voice seemed now like she was containing a chuckle.

I nodded my head before realizing she couldn’t see me “Yes, looks like it”.

“Oh God”, she sighed now, possibly relaxing knowing that nothing was happening. “He is taking Henry for the weekend actually, He has full permission to go. If we could also add him to the list of guardians, I will make sure Bill is there at first hour Monday to sign him.”

“Of course, I would just need you to send me a picture of Him with Henry if it’s possible. Just as proof of identity, I will make sure to add his information.”, I said, myself relaxing my body as I saw the man outside. Now that he wasn’t a pedophile looking to get a kid out of school he looked… cute? Of course his appearance seemed as he had not slept in weeks, but being FBI that just made sense. His eyes met mine through the glass, this time an analyzing gaze ran through my body.

“Of course, I will do so right now”, She said, I broke the staring contest leaning against the wall.

“Thank you ma’am”, I said now.

“Thank you (y/n), have a good weekend”, she said politely.

“You too”, I smiled as I hung the phone up, clicking on the latest text. Attached was a picture of Agent Jareau, with the man behind the glass. He looked a lot more rested on the picture, a bright smile across his face as Henry sat on his lap. You looked up again, now he was chatting with Lilian. Spencer Reid uh?

“Well, Dr. Reid, your alibi checks out”, I made myself smirk from the dumb joke, apparently not so dumb as he had the same reaction. I showed Lilian the picture, her body relaxing as well and smiling up to me. “Agent Jareau wants us to add you to the guardian’s list though, so Lilian here would be needing an ID from you, you will also need to fill some forms”

“Yeah absolutely, anything you need”, he said, his eyes quickly reading the forms that were handed to him by Lilian.

“I will go get Henry”, I said walking towards the classroom, I grabbed his backpack before approaching the kid.

“Hey buddy, someone is here to pick you up”, I announced lowering myself to his level as I saw him coloring something.

“Is it uncle Spencer?”, His eyes illuminated when he looked up at me, I smiled as his innocent emotion.

“Yes”, I said looking at the sheet of paper. “Is that for him?” The picture had a kid, possibly him, next to a man possibly four times as tall. I bit my lip to retain a chuckle.

“Yes”, He showed me the picture enthusiastically.

“Ok let’s go give him this”, I picked it up and with the other hand I took his. I walked to the desk where he was getting his credentials back.

“Uncle Spencer”, the kid broke my hold as he ran to the Doctor, who in a flash bended to pick him up, embracing him.

“Hey buddy”, the man smiled now brightly.

“Here is his backpack, and he drew this for you”, I said handing him the backpack and the drawing, his fingers touching mine but I didn’t pay attention to that. I bit my lip again, the drawing was too comical. Spencer’s eyes darkened as they traveled through my face, landing in my lips. Before he lowered his eyes to the paper.

“Oh c’mon I’m not that tall”, he laughed. His laugh sending shivers down my spine.

“You are”, the kid giggled in glee.

“Well Henry, say bye to Ms (yl/n)”, He said looking at me, the same demeanor he had when he first saw me.

“Bye Miss”, the kid smiled.

“I will be seeing you Monday Henry”, I said smiling to the kid and tilting my head slightly. “It was a pleasure to meet you Dr Reid, I’m sorry for any inconvenience.”

“Not at all, you would hope every place was as good with security as this one.”, He put his hand in his pocket now that he had the backpack slung on his shoulder. “Here”, he handed me a card, “Anything you need you can call me”, His smile now looked a lot more relaxed, but somewhat flirty as he pursed his lips.

“Will do”, I smiled back at him, trying my best not to sound too flirty in front of Lilian.

Another thing I liked about working as a teacher in a private school, there were times that man like Spencer Reid walked into my life. I was pretty good at keeping everything professional but I’m only human, and Spencer Reid was possibly one of the cutest guardians in the school. My fingers lingered as I took the card from him, he gave me a conspiratory smile as he walked away with Henry. God I would need a long shower as soon as I got home.


	2. Chapter 2

I looked up to the clear sky, taking in a breath of fresh air. It was a beautiful Saturday morning in DC. My eyes traveled to the book on my lap, soaking the words. I was wearing an off the shoulder dress, the white and light green flowers blending with my surroundings. The dress ended in my mid tight, giving a good view of my legs. I was not ashamed of my body, I had decided a long time ago that it wasn’t worth the effort. 

I checked the clock on my phone, it was almost time.

“Miss (y/l/n)”, I heard a shriek, before tiny arms collapsed against my waist.

I stood there confused until my eyes lighted in recognition, “Henry”, I said surprised, pulling the kid to my lap instinctively, I looked around before I saw a man and a kid running towards me, my body tensed.

“Henry, you cannot just run like that”, The man’s voice was much higher, his breath heavy.

“Henry”, I lowered my gaze to the kid, he blushed. “You remember how we had the talk of holding hands with adults, how we do not let their hands go?”, The kids nodded sheepishly, “and do you remember stranger danger?”, I asked with the same reprimanding tone, he nodded again.

“You are not a stranger”, he stood his case after a second of consideration. 

“Witty”, I chuckled standing up, the kid perched on my waist. My eyes met with the much taller man in front of me.

“I’m so sorry”, he began when he saw my serious expression. Truth is I was just giving him a hard time, even the best behaved of kids had their moments. It was what being a kid was all about, living in the moment and acting on instinct.

“That’s okay, it happens, and he ran to someone he knew”, I said, ignoring his piercing eyes traveling my body, “That doesn’t mean that what you did was right”, I saw Henry who still had that expression, as it waiting to be reprimanded.

“Yes ma’am”, he said finally, I put him on the ground and he walked to Dr. Reid to hold his hand. I saw the other, older kid standing next to him. 

“Is that your kid?”, I asked, still slightly bended with a smile.

“No, he is my boss’s son, Jack”, he explained looking at the kid.

“Hi Jack”, I extended my hand, “I’m Miss (y/l/n)”, he shook my hand.

“Nice to meet you Miss (y/l/n)”, The kid said politely as I stood upright again, fixing the fabric on my shoulder that had fallen a little out of place. Were all FBI kids as sweet?

“What are you doing here?”, The doctor finally asked when you met his eyes, he looked more rested now, wearing a button up under a sweater, he looked like he was giving a lecture instead of taking a walk on the park.

“We are going to the children’s museum, do you want to come with us Miss (y/l/n)”, Henry asked bouncing off his feet, Spencer looked down at him.

“Henry, we are not supposed to interrupts Adult conversations”, He cautioned, the kid stopped blushing again, Jack came around to take his hand. The kids smiled swinging their arms now.

“I was just about to go to the children’s museum”, I said tugging a strand of hair that had fallen from my bun.

“You were? do you have kids?”, Spencer asked confusedly, his whole body shaking from the kid’s shenanigans happening on his arm. He looked at me with an expression I probably had the previous day when I met him.

“No, I know that it looks weird, but the museum has new exhibits every month, and I find them to be very resourceful. As an educator I’m always trying to find new ways to incorporate new learning activities”, I explained, he nodded. “Still, I appreciate the offer”, I crouched, meeting Henry’s eyes. “But will not like to insert myself into a day with your uncle”

The kid looked almost sad. It melted my heart to know that a student wanted to spend their free time with me.

“That’s okay, I think his uncle would appreciate the help”, I looked up at him, his expression somehow darker from our new positions. “If that’s okay with you”, he finished as I stood up again.

“Yeah, sure”, I said smiling.

“Yey”, Henry said again.

I turned around to grab my book and shove it in my purse, through the side of my eye I saw him inspecting my body. Damn I really need to keep it together.

“So Ms (y/l/n), how long have you been an educator”, it was Jack who asked now that we were walking towards the blue building on the distance.

I smiled, slightly taken back from his question, but mesmerized at how smart the boy sounded. “Three years now”, I said smiling “What grade are you on?” I asked, better than to ask age I supposed. 

“Third grade”, He smiled up at me, so 7-8 years old I noted. The kid was now listening to Henry who demanded his attention to tell him about how he wanted to see the dinosaur exhibits. 

“So are you a liason as well?”, I asked Spencer who was eyeing the kids.

“No, I’m a profiler for the Behavioral Analysis Unit in which JJ works”, He said meeting my eyes now.

“Profiler, that sounds interesting”, I said, JJ had talked about her job sometimes in meetings.

“Yeah, we help local PD’s but we also do it for the research. Having a better understanding of the human psyche helps with preventing things from happening”, He spoke low, eyeing the kids next to us, probably not wanting to hear anything.

“Are you from here?”, I asked changing the topic.

“I’m from Las Vegas”, he said, meeting my eyes with a smile. “You?”

“I am, well I was born in Arlington but moved here when I was three”, I said. He opened the door to the museum. “Thanks”, I said stepping inside.

It wasn’t until the a couple of hours later, and many exhibits that I noted something weird. The exhibit consisted of a room full of cabinets and hidden trinkets, the kids were encouraged to find them, when they did if they did not know what the items were they could approach one of the employees standing around the exhibit for them to help them. Henry and Jack were trying to figure out how to open a wooden chest with other two kids.

“Successful functioning throughout life requires, among other things, well-developed executive functions. EFs refer to the cognitive processes needed to regulate behavior, thoughts, and emotions. Under age 3 kid’s brain are making 700 to 1,00 neural connections every second. As they get older, the brain’s ability to adapt to change reduces, making the first few years of a child’s life critical to their overall development and success in the future. It still is vital for the brain to continue exercising, as the brain isn’t fully developed until the age of 25”, He said, spewing facts like it was the most normal thing to have this in your memory.

It make sense, I thought my brain still has a full year before it develops, and Dr Reid just mushed it into a fine paste. I look at him, a laugh threatening to come out. “Are you a genius?”, I asked, playfully.

“Well”, he took his hand to the back of his neck looking nervous.

My jaw dropped, “You are?”, I laughed now.

“I have eidetic memory, as well as an IQ of of 187. I also have three PhDs, two Associates Degrees, three with the one I’m getting next semester. Oh I can also read 20,000 words per minute”, he said shrugging, adding the last thing as an afterthought. Although his voice was slightly cocky he still look as fresh as he was before.

Well that definitely intimidated me. He noticed that and smiled my way.

“You know, I wondered what kind of Doctor you were, you look young. I guess genius explains it.”, I smiled at him.

“I guess it does”, he pursed his lips and nodded with a smile. Damn I wanted this man to pin me against the nearest wall and just… 

“Uncle Spencer look what we found”, Jack said bringing over an older phone.

“oh look”, he crouched to meet the kids eyelines. “you know? Alexander Graham Bell was the first person to patent the telephone, in 1876. Early telephones were wired directly to each other and could only talk to the phone that they were connected to.”, He said, the kids looked at him mesmerized, it was obvious that they liked hearing their uncle talk. 

“I’m hungry”, Henry said when Jack went back to put the phone where they found it.

“What do you want buddy?”, Spencer said pulling the kid up.

“Pizza?”, he asked, a toothy smile on his face.

“Do you want to join us for pizza?”, Spencer asked you now, you nodded your head.

I looked at the kids who were devouring their slices. I smiled at Spencer when he came back to vision, he had the cups of soda on his hands. I helped him put them on the table and sat back in the booth.

“Your tummies are going to hurt if you eat that fast”, he cautioned, handing their lidded drinks.

“Yes Uncle Spencer”, the kids said in unison.

“Here”, he handed me my own drink now.

“Thanks Dr Reid”, I smiled sipping its contents.

“Please call me Spencer, or Reid”, He said starting to eat his slice.

I nodded looking at him, starting to work on my own plate. We sat there for like thirty minutes. At some point his hand had brushed my leg but I ignored it, maybe it was a mistake. The second time, my legs pressed against each other. I could see the smile behind his chewing. I was imagining things right?

“So I will eat them in a box. And I will eat them with a fox. And I will eat them in a house. And I will eat them with a mouse. And I will eat them here and there. Say! I will eat them anywhere! I do so like Green eggs and ham! Thank you! Thank you, Sam-I-am”

The classroom of kids giggled at the much lower voice of the character, I was sitting in my desk as the kids sat around me. A thing about working in an exclusive school is that there was a one hour pick up time, in which parents took the kids, that is when the school actually ended and I did your best to keep their young minds entertained. It was Wednesday now, I hadn’t heard from Spencer since he dropped me off at my apartment, insisting it’s the least he could do. Well at least he got a free babysitter.

A knock came from the door, and you met Jason’s eyes, he nodded letting me know he got this.

I walked towards the door opening it. “Mr Lamontagne”, I smiled.

“Good morning. Please, (y/n), call me William, I already told you.”, he smiled, Jennifer Jareau had won the jackpot with this one, he might’ve been the only parent who made no attempt to flirt with me. He was extremely polite and his southern accent just made me feel comfortable around him.

“Let me get Henry”, I said, walking back and getting his backpack and the sleepy kid, I handed him to his dad. The kid barely registering he was in new arms.

“Hey I wanted to give you this”, he handed me a blue envelope. “It’s Henry’s birthday and we wanted to invite you. This saturday, I promise you that there would be enough adults around”, he said with a bright smile.

“Thank you Mr- William, I will not miss it”, I smiled taking the envelope and watching them walk away.

Spencer Reid is going to be there right? of course he is.


	3. Chapter 3

I took a deep breath before knocking on the door, I could hear and almost recognize the gleeful cheers coming from the backyard.

“Miss (y/n)”, William smiled when he opened the door.

“Good afternoon”, I said politely

“Come in come in”, he said stepping aside so I could walk in, there were a couple of adults inside, the table right at the entrance full of presents.

“(y/n)!”, Someone exclaimed before I turned around. 

“Hello Ms Jareau”, I said smiling when the woman met me with a hug.

“C’mon, JJ”, she corrected me with a warm smile, I nodded my head.

“Miss (y/l/n)”, You heard Henry exclaim when he saw me through the glass door leading to the backyard. He ran to give me a hug which I crouched to reciprocate.

“Happy birthday Henry”, I said smiling giving him the bag.

“Thank you”, he excitedly showed his dad who pointed at the table, letting him know he had to put it with the others.

“I believe you might recognize some of the parents”, she said walking you to the backyard, where round tables were scattered through the lawn. “Please get comfortable, have something to eat something to drink, anything you need you let us know alright?”, She said noticing how someone else was coming in.

“Thank you, I’ll be fine”, I reassured her, she patted my shoulder as she walked to the front door. 

I gave a couple more steps, my feet leaving wooded area of the porch and stepping into the grass, I looked around the tables trying to find familiar faces, well one familiar face.

“Miss (y/l/n)?”, I heard a familiar voice as I turned around. 

“Mr. Williams hi”, I smiled, not really surprised, Henry and Emmy are good friends.

“How do you manage to look this good all the time?”, he kissed my hand as I offered it for a handshake.

“Beats me”, I chuckled lightly tugging a strand of hair behind my ear. The outfit of the day was a flowy baby blue sundress, with a light tan cardigan that was actually longer than the dress itself.

“If I had known you went to the kid’s parties I would have invited you to Emmy’s”, He said sipping from his drink.

“Yeah, I love my babies, if they want me there I will most definitely be there”, I said with sincerity.

“That is just a nice sentiment coming from an honest woman”, his voice coy as he stepped closer, “You know? sometimes it takes an honest woman to make an honest man”.

“sometimes people either are, or aren’t”, I bit my lip. He was a handsome man, but his record was just too messy.

“People might surprise you”, he grinned looking down at me.

I kept my head high, not really letting him intimidate me. “I will go get something to drink Mr. Williams, have fun surprising someone else”, I cooed the last part as I walk past him.

When I stepped back into the kitchen I took a deep breath, serving myself some homemade lemonade, and tasting it. Damn, southern lemonade was good, I thought as I spun around, the other parents that were there were people I barely talked to anyway, and I couldn’t see Spencer anywhere so it might actually be Mr Williams lucky day. I thought as I sipped from the cup, leaning against the counter.

“Oh my God”, I heard a female voice next to me. 

“Hey”, I said as a pair of arms pulled me in for a tight hug, instantly recognizing her. “Penelope”, I smiled.

“(y/n), I had no idea JJ had invited you, you hair looks amazing.”, She said dramatically gesturing at my hair that was for once wore down. 

“Thank you, you look beautiful as well”, I smiled brightly. She and I just clicked everytime she had to pick Henry up.

“Come with me I need to introduce you to my people”, she pulled you outside, and that is when I realized why I hadn’t seen Spencer earlier. He was sitting on a table with other people, but they were on the porch area rather than in the yard. I blushed, they probably witnessed the whole interaction with Mr Williams.

“Guys, you need to meet (y/n), she is Henry’s teacher and she is awesome.”, Penelope said smiling excitedly.

“That is overselling”, I cautioned as I looked at the people around me.

“Okay this is Derek Morgan”, she pointed at the playboy standing closer to us, he smiled brightly showing his perfect teeth and extending his hand.

I shook it giving him a small smile. Damn he was hot.

“This is Emily Prentiss”, she signaled at the woman next to morgan, she smiled extending her hand. I shook it with a smile and a nod.

“This is David Rossi, he does not want to be here”, Penelope said putting her hand next to her mouth as in covering a secret.

I chuckled as I shook his hand. “She is right”, he said, talking through his teeth on his smile, making me laugh a little.

“This is Aaron Hotchner, he is the boss man”, Penelope said pointing at the man, he was polite as he extended his hand.

I narrowed my eyes almost recognizing his face, “You are Jack’s dad?”, I asked, apparently a bad idea since his whole body tensed and his eyes narrowed.

“yes…”, he was about to say something.

“She was with me the day of the museum, we found her on our way there and she helped me with the boys”, Spencer, who was sitting next to the man said quickly, probably catching his boss before he arrested me right there.

“Oh yeah”, he said now relaxing again taking his beer from the table. “Jack told me about you, I’m sorry I must’ve forgotten your name.”

“that is alright is a pleasure to meet everyone”, I smiled looking around the table, “Nice to see you again Dr. Reid”, the man’s eyes were wandering over my body as he smiled, meeting my eyes.

“Very nice to see you too again (y/n)”, He replied.

“Sit with us”, Penelope said, not really a question as she pulled the two chairs left out of the table. I nodded as I took a sit.

“So I guess you guys are the BAU”, I asked, looking around, I didn’t know being hot was a requirement for the bureau. 

“The one and only”, The man I remembered as Derek said smiling.

“Do you have kids?”, The other man, Rossi I think, asked. Earning a elbow to the arm by the brunette next to him.

“I told you it is no longer acceptable to ask women that question”, she cautioned.

“It’s okay, no I don’t. I’m told you kinda need a partner for that”, I joked.

“First of all no, second of all I hear you”, The brunette, Emily, tilted her glass to you, earning a laugh from the team.

“I like to be there for my students, and William and JJ are some of my favorite parents.”, I said explaining myself as Rossi nodded.

“You must be an angel then, because working with kids and then on your free time going to kids parties? It takes a saint”, He said, a slight grimace on his face.

“Dave”, Hotchner said shaking his head but still letting a smile sprawl across his face.

“Do you like working for TLT?”, the man asked now looking at you.

“I do actually, It’s a lot better than working for public”, I pursed my lips, remembering the one semester I worked for them.

“With the underfunding problem in the country, and the outdated curriculum that is in average two years behind it is quite difficult for an educator to like their jobs in the public school system. Not to mention the herd mentality of packing classrooms without thinking on the specific needs of each kid. The school system in America is created as a means to make all students think inside the box till certain age in which they are expected to choose a life path”, Spencer said, everyone just looked at him.

“You need to drink”, Morgan said chuckling.

“Everytime he rambles he has to drink”, Penelope explained leaning towards you. 

“He is going to be on the floor by the end of the night”, Emily said laughing as Spencer took a big gulp of his beer.

Spencer met my eyes now, brushing his lips with the back of his hand.

“Jack goes to the Foundations, but JJ has been talking so good about TLT that I might just give them a chance”, Hotchner said looking at me.

“You definitely should, If he is going to fourth next year”, I started thinking, “That would be Ms Kayes, she is one of our senior educators, stand up woman”, I smiled.

“Yeah, I might just take him for the admission interview.”, He sipped from his beer.

“Well I shouldn’t say this but I saw Jack and he is phenomenal, he would pass the test just fine, still… I can put a good word for you, just to be completely sure he gets in”, I smiled, I knew my way to the principal’s.

“You would do that?”, he asked slightly surprised.

“Of course”, I fumbled on my purse taking out a pen and writing something in a napkin. “Here is my number, you let me know if you have any questions on the process”, I smiled at him handing him the napkin. Before Emily took it from his hands.

“Okay I am not planning on having kids right now, but when I do you’ll help me right?”, she said wiggling her eyebrows. I crackled.

“Spence, now”, JJ said approaching the table hurriedly.

“Sure sure”, He said standing up, “let me go get everything”, he walked towards the house, I followed him with my eyes. 

“(y/n), are they treating you good?”, JJ asked smiling.

“They are”, you nodded.

“Watch out, specially for that one”, she pointed at Derek who took his hand to his heart.

“If anything you should’ve cautioned her against Rossi, We know the woman of DC aren’t safe with him around”, he said faking hurt.

“Ok guys, showtime”, William stood on the middle of the yard.

“Oh My, (y/n), you need to see this”, Penelope pulled you up and dragged you to the circle, behind the kids who were clapping excitedly.

“Good afternoon everyone”, You heard Spencer said as he walked in, he was now wearing a cape and a top hat. “Who is ready for some magic?”, he asked at the sea of giggling kids.

I took my hand to my mouth containing a laugh. It was unfair how adorable he looked.

“He is a lot funnier here, at work he does something that’s called physics magic a whole thing”, Penelope rolled her eyes. 

The kids clapped as he pulled a card behind a girl’s ear, showing the audience it was the same card as before.

“For my next trick I need an assistant”, He looked around, his eyes meeting mine “You”, he said, not breaking eye contact.

I pointed at myself, Penelope pushing me to the front.

“C’mere”, he said pulling my arm lightly, my skin tingly under his touch.

I did a small curtsy when I was in front of the kids, earning a giggle.

“Do you trust me?”, He asked from behind me, my body shivering, but I could not show anything.

“yes”, I said sure of the word.

“You will extend your arms, and make fists with your hands”, I did as he said, putting my hands in fists right in front of me. I felt how his hands touched mine making sure they were on fists.

“Okay”, he said again, I saw him pull something from his pocket, a rope. He started tying my hands together. It took him about a minute to tie it. “I need you to pull really hard okay, do not open your hands”, he said making exaggerated magic moves with his hands. 

I did as he said, pulling my arms, the rope falling flat as if it hadn’t been tied, he caught it with his hands, the kids gasped mesmerized. 

“Now open your left hand”, He said you opened your fist waving your empty fingers at the public. “Now your right”, he said you opened your right hand revealing a slightly mushed flower. You laughed now, as he instructed you to go back to your place, following with some tricks with his hat.

“How did you do that?” I asked when he rejoined the table, most kids were eating cake now. His hair looked a lot messier now.

“Magician’s code”, he shrugged as I chuckled.

“He never tells us anything, not even when that Magic shit is a chick’s magnet”, Derek said leaning towards you, he was now sitting next to you.

“Morgan, language”, Emily said threatening.

“My bad”, he said. 

Turns out everyone on the BAU was not only hot, they were a hell of a lot fun. I laughed as Emily told me another of the funny work anecdotes, it was clear that everyone tried to look at the bright side of their jobs.

I covered my mouth when I yawned, I looked around, the party much emptier. Jack was asleep on his dad’s arms, apparently the two would just stay the night.

“We owe you an actual grown up’s party”, Rossi said handing my phone back, it had gone in a circle for everyone to put their numbers on, apparently the group had liked you too.

“I’ll hold you to that, but for now, I need to get going”, You saw the time, the train would probably take about three hours to take you home.

“Do you need us to call you a cab?” William offered, with Henry sleeping on his lap as well, probably from the sugar crash. 

“That’s very kind…”

“I can drive her, I was going to take JJ’s car anyway”, Spencer said standing up.

“You leaving kid?”, Morgan asked slightly surprised.

“yeah, I have homework”, he nodded.

“Okay, you two be safe”, Hotchner looked at the two of you.

“Thank you” I said as he walked with me to the inside of the house.

“No problem, Hey JJ I’m leaving, taking the car”, he announced as JJ chatted with another woman.

“Oh sure”, she approached the two of you. “Thank you for coming”, she hugged you. “If he bothers you too much you can punch him”, she said pulling away.

“Wait, didn’t you drink?”, she asked Spencer narrowing her eyes.

“I had one beer approximately four hours ago, I’ll be fine.” He grimaced as the woman leaned to mess his hair even more.

“Okay Spence, love you be safe”, she said smiling.

The ride home was quite, with him just making small talk here and there.

“This is me”, I announced when he parked in front of my house. “I know that you said you have homework, but maybe if you want to come in for a drink?”, My mouth spoke, although my brain was telling you that you probably shouldn’t.

“Sure”, he smiled, getting out of the car quickly and running to your side, opening the door before you could even get out. Well he seems eager you thought.

As I walked to the house my mind made a list on why this was a bad idea.  
He was Henry’s Godfather, therefore a Guardian of one of the kids.  
He said he had homework, it would be very hypocritical from you to keep him from his studies.  
The man was intoxicating, all afternoon every time he spoke you pressed your legs just imagining what his tongue could be doing instead of rambling.  
you had actually liked the team, and an affair with one of them would just make it impossible for a hangout later.

It didn’t matter though, because he was walking in, and I hadn’t had any action in a while, so I was about to pull every play on the book. 

I walked towards the house, opening the front door, when a weight slammed against my chest.

“Hey boy”, I said excitedly, balancing the weight of the dog as I walked in.

“Oh”, Spencer eyed the dog wearily. Still he stepped inside, closing the door

“I’m sorry, I should’ve asked if you were okay with dogs”, I said, “This is goofy”, you petted the golden retriever. Making sure to bend just enough in Spencer’s direction. 

“I’m”, he cleared his throat, “They don’t really like me but I’m okay with them”, he eyed the dog. “Golden retrievers are not really guard dogs”, he pointed out. Goofy pulled from his collar to smell the man, his tail wagging.

“No, he is just my big ol baby, I had one when I was little and two years ago I decided to get him, he spends the days with my neighbor and she gets him here when I come home”, I said walking Goofy out to the backyard. “So wine?” I asked when I finally closed the door. 

“Sure”, he brushed his hair out of his face.

“Let me see”, I said walking to the kitchen isle, reading the labels of some of the bottles. I leaned against the counter just a little. I was giving him just enough but not too much.

“Are you serious?”, He asked, I tried to turn around, but his arms pinned me against the marble countertop.

“Excuse me?”, I asked, holding my breath.

“When I first met you I thought, sure, this might just be her teacher persona”, he placed his mouth right next to my ear, I closed my eyes. “Then I saw you outside, always so chirpy and happy, a fucking Golden Retriever? Why am I surprise you don’t leave in a treehouse or something?”, I felt his hand lay on my waist. “Your innocent smile that made the whole team fall in love with you, you like that right? Wrapping the world in your little fingers? Having the dad’s melt at your touch? What was his name? Mr Williams. He sure seemed eager to please you, but you don’t want him.”, his hand started traveling down my thigh, fingers brushing the bare skin now. “I was wondering if this is what you wanted, and then you invite me in. Even after I said I had homework, you a teacher invited me in. Do you think I don’t notice the way your crossed legs always press against each other every time you see something you like? Want to know what do I like? These fucking princess doll dresses that you pull.”, His hands pulled the fabric up. “At least you are wearing biker shorts”, he chuckled, his lips now pressed against my skin. “These will not do us any good will they?” He asked, my breath getting heavier. “Answer me”, he pulled my hair slightly.

“No”, I said simply, pressing my lips together.

“No what?” He cooed, his lips catching my ear lobe.

“No Sir”, I said my legs pressing together, wanting him to continue his journey.

“Dr. Reid for you little girl, now tell me what you want”, he prompted his other hand traveling to my chest where he slipped his hand on my bra.

“I want you”, I sighed, pressing my body against him “Dr Reid”. I finished, signing my destiny


	4. Chapter 4

When the light hit my eyes I flinched, instinctively trying to cover my eyes with my hand, they hurted. Why did my arms hurt? why did the rest of my body hurt? I tried to move slowly, finding my answers perched to the back of me, pulling me closer when he felt my movements. Snippets from last night flooded my mind.

  
  


_ “My sweet girl, you need to tell me if I hurt you alright?”, He said, the rope burning my wrist tied on my back, I nodded my head. My eyes rolling back as his fingers thrusted deliriously slow inside of me. _

Ok that must definitely was a first for me. I felt his hand tighten around my abdomen, my eyes traveling around the room, Goofy was sleeping on his bed on the floor. I do not remember getting him inside.

“Good morning”, I giggled when his mouth started placing kisses on my neck, he hummed too tired to speak. My hips pulled back, a slight pain coming from my buttcheeks, they were really sore.

_ “I will make sure you do not forget this for the next week of your life, or ever”, He had said entering my body all at once, a sharp slapping sound coming from where his hand met my butt.  _

“Are you okay?”, his voice groggy.

“I am”, I said softly. remembering something else.

_ “Are you okay?”, he had asked, my head barely nodding. He started massaging my wrists and my legs, slowly and carefully paying special attention to the pain on my inner thighs. _

“I probably need to shower”, I said, it wasn’t something that I wanted to do, but I needed to check my body.

“I know”, he mumbled, I inched away slowly, sitting up and realizing I wasn’t wearing anything, I tried to pull the flat sheet but his hand grabbed a hold of it. “Hey”, I chuckled.

“Hey”, he said in the same tone. I smiled, not really letting him see me, and walked to the restroom, feeling his gaze on my body.

The warm water hit my body like a blessing. I let it run, taking away any trace of the sinning done yesterday. I ran the loofa through my body, some part stung other hurt. Where did Spencer learned to fuck like that? The guy looked shy and awkward at best. I remembered something else when the water hit my face, bringing me to reality.

_ “You like kids uh? I will just give you one of your own right now. I will fill you up, I do not care if you want it or not, I will fucking ruin you”, He said bottoming out, a scream escaped my mouth. _

_ “Please”, I begged. _

_ “Please what?”, he asked, his voice cocky. _

_ “Please do it Doctor Reid”, I finished saying at the same time that the shaking in my body started. _

My head came back to reality, I massaged my scalp doing math in my brain. I probably couldn’t, I should still take a pill to be sure. Maybe, or just wait and see. My hands traveled to my lower abdomen when I shook the thoughts away. Spencer was a one night stand so far, it was ridiculous to be thinking like that. I finished washing my hair when I stepped out, looking into the full bodied mirror.

“Holy hell”, I said, inspecting my body, bruises and hickeys peppered over my skin, a mark on my neck to remind me of where his hand was last night. I turned around to see small marks on my back, and my buttcheeks raw red. What the fuck was he thinking? I was a fucking kindergarten teacher, I could not go to work looking like this, these marks would no go away in a day. What the fuck was I thinking? Oh right, I wasn’t thinking I was too busy being a whore for him. I rolled my eyes at my frustration, still a playful smile crossed my lips. That had to be the best sex I’ve had. Besides, turtleneck sweaters looked good on me.

I stepped out with a towel around my body ready to reprimand him, maybe I would drop the towel and let him finish bruising me. I stopped when I saw the empty bed, it had been made, in the middle the clothes I wore last night were folded carefully. I walked towards it picking up the note right on top.

_ “My Sweet Girl,  _

_ I wasn’t kidding yesterday when I said I had homework,  _

_ I also have some errands to run. _

_ I knew if I stayed I wouldn’t be able to bring myself out of bed. _

_ I hope your day is as beautiful as that smile of yours. _

_ Dr Reid.” _

I sat frustrated on the bed, my fingers running through the paper. My eyes traveled to Goofy who was yawning, he had just woken up.

“You want to go for a walk and some coffee, boy?”, I asked, he started wagging his tail excitedly. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


I completely hated Dr. Reid, I decided sipping from my tea. More than a week had passed, it was the next Tuesday already. Not a call, not a text not a nothing. Okay, maybe I was just a one night stand, but not even a text asking me how I was doing? I had to stay seated at work Monday and Tuesday, lying to Jason about how I had pulled a muscle working out. Well that wasn’t necessarily a lie but still. Okay maybe I did not hate Dr. Reid, I hated myself. I hated myself for keeping the note in my nightstand and reading it every night. It isn’t like I didn’t mess around with guys, I did. Spencer was different though, everything about him just called me like a moth to the light. He was the sun and I was just stupidly gravitating around him. Nevermind I do hate him.

I was painting my ninety fourth flower, My wrist tire. I should’ve just printed them out. I eyed the big poster board. **What is a Hundred?** in bold colorful letters, I continued running the brush on the paper. 

I was sitting crossed legged on the floor, Wearing an oversize NYU hoodie that covered my body down to my butt. I heard a knocking coming from the door and I hushed Goof who was ready to bark.

I opened the door slowly, stopping when the pin stopped it. It was dark out, still, I could recognize the tall man behind the door.

“Spencer?”, I asked confused, I closed the door so I could open it again, he stepped in quickly, probably running away from the cold. Even when it was the middle of spring the temperatures drop significantly at night. “What are you doing here?”, I asked now that I could see him.

If the first time I met him he seemed tired now he looked like a zombie. His eyes were baggy and puffy, his hair matted and unkempt. The first buttons of his shirt were opened, a tie slung around his neck.

“Are you okay?”, I asked softly, he couldn’t have been mugged right? He is FBI. I narrowed my eyes bringing my hand to his arm, I rubbed it lightly before he pulled me in for a hug.

“I’m sorry to bother you”, I said smelling my hair, burrowing his head on mine.

“you don’t bother”, I said sincerely, wrapping my arms around him. The smell of cologne and sweat filled my lungs, I did not mind it one bit, if anything it was the sweetest smell to ever enter my nose.

“I’m sorry for not texting, we were on a case since past Monday”, he whispered, I nodded. In all my frustration with the man I forgot that he had a very important job to do. His body felt tense and tired.

“You don’t have to explain yourself”, I said separating our bodies and guiding him to the sofa. He followed without much protest and sat down. Without explanation I walked to the kitchen. The water still hot enough. I placed some honey and a teabag in a mug and filled it with the water. I saw the man rubbing the back of his neck, his eyes on the TV screen now. With Tangled playing on the TV he might just think I actually had a mental health issue. I shook the thoughts away when I decided that the tea was ready. I stirred it some more before removing the bag and walking towards him, handing him the mug. He looked slightly surprised, but accept it nevertheless. I guided my eyes to the TV, giving him some privacy. 

  
  


“You are working”, he said after a while, handing me the empty mug now, his body already more relaxed.

“Yeah, I’m almost done”, I stood up putting the mug on the table, and grabbing a blanket, he looked at me with his eyebrows arched. “Lay down”, I chuckled, he complied, I wrapped the blanket on his legs, he was way too tall for both the sofa and the blanket, still he simply curled up.

I sat back on the floor, continuing my flowers, This time I was working faster with the painting process, at some point I felt his hand seek mine, I grabbed his hand, still concentrating on what I was doing. When I finally finished and placed the last flower to dry I looked back to the man behind me.

He was sleeping, his breathing soft. Part of me knew that he had a horrible week, and that he probably just didn’t want to be alone tonight. Still he came to me, I thought, in a moment of vulnerability he came to my doorstep.I considered my options, the reality is that if he slept like that his back was going to seriously hurt the next day. I ran my fingers softly through his arm, he stirred away, relaxing when his eyes found my face.

“let’s go to bed”, I whispered, he nodded and sat up. I took this opportunity to take his tie off and place it in on of the chairs. I started undoing his vest and shirt. He had an amused look on his face. “Oh no, it’s not your lucky day Dr Reid, I just want you to be comfortable.”, I said undoing his belt buckle. He stood up, taking his pants off himself. I couldn’t help but notice the building bulk in his briefs. Underneath them his massive co…

“Let’s go to bed”, He said this time, I guided him to my bedroom where he was quick to place himself in the bed. I saw as his eyes found mine. “C’mere”, he said as an invitation, I smiled and got under the blankets, my arms wrapping around his body.

I hummed delighted by the comfort.

“It was a bad case, I got home and I just couldn’t be alone. I needed to be with my sweet girl again”, he said, his fingers rubbing my back. He needed to be with his sweet girl, it wasn’t just that he was alone, he needed me. I tried to convince myself.

I was just about to tell him how we had seen each other three times our whole lives. He seemed to know that though, he had an eidetic memory he knew that. I also knew that, and still I was perched next to his body as if it was my place.

“I’m here”, my words left my mouth before my brain could register them.

“You are”, he looked down at me. I hoped that if he saw into my eyes for long enough he would find the comfort he needed, that he knew that my heart skipped a beat every time I saw his face. He would see that I was falling aimlessly, with no attempt to break the fall, with no need to. I trusted him. I’ve never met anyone like the man that laid next to me.

He seemed to be reading my mind, or so I hoped. Because his lips traveled to meet with mine. This time softly, slowly. There was no escalation, no hurry to get to a finish line, no motive and no obstacles. His lips danced with mine for a long time. Until I had almost lost feeling in them. He snuggled closer closing his eyes, both of us letting the sweet slumber wrap us. 

I felt movement behind me, when I opened my eyes my sight met the red bold numbers.

“I still have an hour before I have to get up”, I mumbled, feeling his hands travel under my shirt.

“I wonder what we can do in one hour”, He said, I kissed his arm that was under my head.

“Aren’t you tired?”, I asked, when his hands started pulling my underwear down.

“I had a great night’s sleep, and I do not have to go to work today”, He said lining myself with my entrance, I wiggled my hips to make it easier for him, throwing a leg over his. “You could also call out.”

“Who is going to teach the kids to count to one hundred?”, I asked, a playful smile as he started placing kisses on the back of my neck.

“Honestly?”, He said moving my head so that our eyes met. “I do not care”, he thrusted slowly, watching my face contort as he entered me.

“Dr. Reid”, I moaned his name when he started the slow pace, this was so much different than the first time. He moved kneading my breasts from under the shirt, moving slowly with no rush. We were a tangled mess of limps and sweat.

“My sweet girl, so warm, so tight, so perfect”, He said, pulling me closer to him. My heart grew hearing his voice. Whatever place he wanted to take me right now I would just follow him blindly.

Every time I was on the edge he would stop for a moment and kiss my lips, before starting again. This went on for a while until my body started shaking under him. He buried completely pressing his hand against my lower stomach. 

“Spencer”, I sighed collapsing against his body.

He embraced me for a while. My eyelids half closed while I listened to our heavy breathing and heartbeats. 

“I will go take a shower, if that is okay with you”, he said this time, Still he stayed right there, holding me close.

“It’s quite alright, there are new toothbrushes and a couple of loofas under the sink.”, I said, knowing that I just definitely invited him to have a toothbrush at my place. He seemed to react to that, he separated himself placing a kiss on my cheek.

“Thank you”, He smiled at my direction walking into the bathroom. I stayed there, smiling widely. Before life pulled me back to reality.

“Ugh”, I groaned sitting up, I probably needed to wash the sheets. I made a bundle, making sure to take his boxers as well, I walked to the living room where I took the rest of his clothes and started the washing machine.

“Hey, did you see my boxers anywhere?”, He asked, walking into the kitchen with a towel around his waist. My eyebrows shoot up.

“Oh god”, Abby said laughing. She was my neighbor, and had come to get Goof.

“I’m so sorry”, Spencer said mortified hurriedly going back into the room.

“Oh My God!”, she mouthed.

“Nothing to see here”, I hurriedly guided her out, “I’ll see you later buddy love you”, I petted Goofy one more time, Abby tried to get a glance before exiting completely. I sighed before laughing.

“Come out”, I called him from the kitchen again.

“She is gone? Is she your neighbor?”, He asked, coming out and making sure no one was there.

“Yeah, she is Abby Dempley”, I said. “Maybe one day I’ll introduce you, you know someday when you are not half naked”, I joked, making his blush take over his face.

“I didn’t know”, he defended himself, Making me laugh again.

“I know, here”, I offered him a cup of coffee. “Your clothes are in the dryer”, I said pointing to the laundry room.

“Coffee, and fresh laundry? Are you even real?” He asked, embracing me. I knew that if I even as much as let him give me a kiss I wouldn’t be able to get ready on time. He looked adorable though, his wet curly hair dripping into his body. I would need to talk to him about my pet peeve of people not drying before getting out of the shower. Although now that a drop was rolling down his body to his abdomen I didn’t mind it as much. 

I pinched myself playfully, before biting my lip in consideration. “I think so, you are the Doctor, make a hypothesis or something”, I said breaking his embrace, he pouted slightly. “I need to go shower”, I pointed to the bathroom and he simply nodded.

“Don’t be so kind”, He said before I entered the room.

“What?” I turned confused.

“Don’t be so kind to me, I’m like a cat. You treat me kindly I might just stay”, He said, casually sipping from his coffee.

“I’ll make sure to leave warm milk at my doorstep every night”, I teased walking into the room. I leaned against the door. He might just stay, as if that was a bad thing. 

Honestly if this is how mornings with Spencer start I will become a morning person, I will start to wake up the moment the first bird wakes up. I do not care, I will let this man turn my life upside down if he asked me with a smile. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic is inspired by It Will Come Back, by Hozier. BTW


	5. Chapter 5

I stretched over the Yoga mat, my fingers trying to reach my toes. My body hurting in all the right places as I slowly sat up again. It was Friday night and I all wanted to do was go home and draw a bubble bath. I smiled, as my fingers brushed my legs when trying to stretch again. I wish it were Spencer’s hands all over me, but he was on a case, apparently the ‘Wednesday off’ had lasted until about four o’clock, when he was picking me up from work and received a call. I did not mind it, he had called me three times Thursday just to ask how I was doing. Again this morning, when by the sound of his voice he sounded like he had just woken up. Still he was in NYC probably working, or probably meeting some girl and I was here daydreaming about his eyes in DC. I enabled the hands free when my phone started ringing.

“Hi sweet girl”, I heard his soft voice on the other side.

“Hi Doctor”, I groaned as I sat up again, this time arching my back to make some bones crack.

“Am I interrupting something?”, he asked playfully.

“Not really, this guy I’m with doesn’t really know how to move, not like you”, I said, making sure no one was around me in the almost empty gym room, only another girl too busy weightlifting.

“Hm”, he replied, giving me nothing from his tone. I bit my lip. “We solved the case, we should be making it to the city in a couple of hours”, He said now, I could hear rumbling behind him.

“hm”, it was my turn to reply, “Well if this guy doesn’t get me too tired, I might leave my door open”, I said now.

“Good, because if he doesn’t make you too tired, I will make sure that you pass out after I’m done with you”, he purred into the phone, making every inch of my body shiver.

“I will see you later Dr. Reid”, I almost moaned his name into the phone as I hung up quickly. 

The promise of another night with him was enough to put my mind to work. I stood up gathering my belongings and left the gym after all I only had a couple of hours to get ready.

I was sitting in the kitchen table, sipping from a glass of wine. My leg bouncing up and down as I eyed the clock. He was going to be here any minute. 

As soon as the knocking came from the door I launched myself from my seat to open it. I made sure to take the glass with me, I moved my hair a little and fixed my outfit. God what was I doing?

“Doctor Spencer Reid, as I live and breath”, I feigned as his jaw dropped, eyeing me before hurriedly getting inside, his eyes never leaving mine.

“You know your condo is right in front of a street right?”, He asked, trying to reprimand but his hands were already seeking my body.

“Good thing I know a couple of FBI agents who can protect me”, I teased, seeing how he dropped his go bag on the floor.

“It is from the FBI agents that they need to protect you”, His arms moved quickly to pull me up to him, my legs wrapping around his waist. “Tell me, please, that you did not open the door on a bath robe with nothing underneath”, He closed his eyes, some frustration from his voice, but clearly more lust than frustration. I simply snickered in his lips as I pressed myself against him, leaving a wet trail that he probably could feel even under the shirt.

“I was about to take a bath officer. A person does not take a bath with clothes on right?”, I asked innocently.

“I will have to corroborate that myself”, He stumbled walking to my room, making sure to press me against any wall that was on the way. I gave him a sip of my drink on the way, definitely not an easy task. When he opened the bathroom door his face showed, admiration? sincere surprise? 

The hour and a half that he took to get in was enough for me to go shopping. I had gotten cotton candy candles, chocolate covered strawberries, good wine and some grapes. Of course I couldn’t have acted like a normal booty call and wait for him to come in and just do, things that normal people do. I had to go all out, a smile grew on his face as his eyes met mine. He put me slowly on the floor, making sure I stood firmly before his hands left my body. 

“My sweet girl”, He said kissing me again, I took it as approval to start taking his sweater and shirt off, he let my hands trail his naked torso now that I was done. I started working on his pants, unbuckling his belt and undoing his pants, letting them hit the floor. He wiggled out of them, kicking his shoes and bending to remove his socks. I just saw him, a smile on my face. When he finished I got close again, fiddling with the elastic of his boxers. I took a breath before pulling them down, My body following and kneeling in front of him.

I hummed while licking his length. He placed his hand on the back of my head.

I moaned at the feeling of his fingers digging in my scalp. I opened my mouth again, this time taking him without hesitation. I made a slow rhythm of it, before taking as much as I could. When his tip hit the back of my throat an a gag escaped me I heard his soft moans. I smiled, my hand starting soft strokes.

“That’s a good girl”, He said, this time pushing himself entirely into my mouth, or as much as I could. I gagged again, not breaking the eye contact. Something darker grew in him, and he pried me away, helping me stand up. 

“I would cross earth and ocean to see you swallow me, not today though”, he said, bringing me up to him again, seeking the sink to make me sit in it. “Today I want to finish somewhere else”, He entered me. The rhythm this time merciless, he looked proudly at me practically yelling, my head against the mirror from my arched back, enjoying him. I would lie if I said I knew how long he had me like that. I didn’t time blurred with every thrust and I just submitted completely to him. I felt his hand meet the sweet spot, starting aggressive strokes. Soon enough I was convulsing on his embrace. He continued the pace until he found his own release, at which point he buried himself in me. 

“Good lord”, I mumbled after a while, feeling my body tense when he separated himself. I was still wearing the bath robe too. I stroked his face with the back of my hand. His eyes piercing mine. 

For a moment I wanted to ask him how many of these we had left, of many times we could do something like this, this way. So needy, so intense, like lovers who have not seen each other in a lifetime and suddenly had one more chance. Like an animal who has found the perfect prey. I also wished it would never stop. He, as always, seemed to know exactly what to say. 

“You make me feel something primal everytime you are near”, he said, and I could not understand why those words made me so happy. 

He untied my robe and guided me to the still warm bath tub. I was thankful for water heaters. He got in first, guiding my hips to sit right in front of him, my back flushed to his chest. I hummed when I got comfortable.

“Let’s see what you have here”, He looked around, taking one of the strawberries and guiding it to my mouth. I opened it and he placed it on my tongue, He seemed to enjoy the way I bit down and sucked on the fruit. 

We continued this for a while, I feeding him a couple of grapes and him enjoying the way I ate the strawberries. The steam around us for a second separated us from the real world to this one, one filled with childish kisses and hand feeding. This time, neither of us tried to hide the butterflies flying in our stomachs. 

Waking up the next day was hard, mainly because after our little vignette on the sink we had another one on the tub, and another one on the bed, and a smaller one when I woke up in the middle of the night for water and couldn’t resist the way he was hugging the pillow I had been using. Thing is, it was a blessing that it was a saturday. I wanted to sleep all morning, but then I noticed something, I was cold. I moved around the bed, not finding my personal human blanket. For a moment panic ran through my mind. Maybe he had left, again. But then I started smelling coffee, and possibly pancakes, and my smile grew wide on my face.

When I stepped outside I saw him on the phone. “Yes, yes. Please you take care alright? I am fine, I promise. I love you”, I heard him say, My heart beating fast.

Surely he wouldn’t. I mean, surely he won’t be seeing someone else. No, he said I love you, so if anything I was the someone else, I spoke, before letting any more thoughts run through my mind. 

“Good morning”, I said, wearing his sweater that I had found in the floor. That would drive him crazy, I thought. I had, however, buttoned it up, because I am not a sex machine. My body was actually, physically tired. Now, now I was really regretting that decision.

“Good morning”, He said distractedly flipping a pancake. Ok, he was clearly not phased. He was wearing what I assumed were his clothes that he had on the go bag. A plain white shirt and plaid flannel pajama bottoms. I stayed there, he put the phone down, okay.

“I was talking to my mom”, he explained.

“Oh”, ok that made sense.

“She lives here?”, I asked, not really ready to walk up to him.

“No, in Vegas, she… she is in a mental facility”, He said, my heart fell. “Schizophrenia”, he explained.

“Oh I…” I’m sorry? there were really no words, there were, but I didn’t know which ones were the right ones. “I bet she is like her son”, I decided to say instead. “A genius, probably a beautiful woman.”

“Oh she is, she would love you”, he said, his voice clearly changing to a normal one, relaxed. I exhaled, okay I hadn’t said the wrong thing thank God.

“You are making me pancakes?”, I asked excitedly, when I saw the cut up fruit and fried bacon already on the counter. 

“The least I could do”, He finally turned around, eyeing me up and down, a smile on his face. Not one that I expected though, not a playful or flirty, or hungry one. A warm smile on his face as he continued his pancake making. “Clever girl”, He did say after about a second.

“Hmm Dr. Reid”, I hummed perching myself to his side, He moved his arm around me, making me stand closer. His body relaxed, he had probably said more than he wanted to share with me, still he placed a kiss on my template. 

I grabbed his coffee from the counter, sipping from it. A very bad idea, this was not coffee, this was simple syrup, with half and half with a splash of coffee, it was extremely hot too.

“Ugh”, I said out loud, sticking my tongue out. “Spencer what the fuck”, I said, still my tongue out.

His eyes ran through my face, before lowering himself to me and licking my tongue, I jumped back.

“Ew”, I said and he full on laughed, it was a belly laugh, a ‘I’m genuinely’ happy laugh. “Weren’t you the one that does not want to have sex on the floor because there are germs?” I asked, cleaning my mouth with a towel, he just laughed a little more.

“Oh dear, there is nothing I wouldn’t do for that mouth of yours”, he almost sang, flipping another pancake into the plate.

“Why do you drink your coffee like that?”, I asked, looking at the mug, that was legally not called coffee anymore. People had died in the guillotine for far less offending crimes.

“I like sweet things, I thought you knew that”, He winked at my direction. “Now, go sit down so I can actually serve breakfast”, He took my shoulders spinning me and giving my buttcheek a slap when I was already walking.

Although my body jumped a little I still continued to the table, where I sat down, my eyes going outside. “Did you take goof out?”, I asked, the couple of times he has been in my apartment he hasn’t touched him. Always rambling about diseases, and canine bacteria or whatever. I couldn’t help but smile.

“Yes, his mom is a lazy pants and doesn’t wake up till mid morning”, He placed everything in front of me. He must’ve heard me calling him my son, still it moved a special heart string. 

“Well, that is because somebody doesn’t let her sleep.”, I said, cutting into the pancake and eating a piece, it was warm and fluffy and it tasted heavenly. A moan escaped my mouth.

“Good?”, he asked smiling my direction, I nodded as I took another bite.

My phone started vibrating in the table so I flipped it, gesturing at Spencer to see who was calling, He tilted his head to read the name.

“Hi JJ”, I said, when I picked up, putting her on speaker. 

“Hi (y/n), so glad you are finally calling me JJ”, she said, her voice ever warm.

“I was calling because the team is going out tonight, and honestly they kinda loved you. I thought you should join us? It will be a grown ups dinner”, she snickered.

“Sure”, I said eyeing Spencer, he seemed surprised, like he didn’t know about the dinner. “I’d love to go”, I said.

“Great! I will be texting you all the details. It probably will be at around eight thirty. Hey (y/n) another thing, Derek kinda liked you, well he said you were cute, I probably should not tell you this but you know. If you want I can hype you up a little, just let me know. Okay, Henry is spilling his OJ, see you tonight.”, Spencer now had a very interesting look on his face. I hung up the phone.

“Wow”, I said directing my eyes outside as I sipped from my coffee. “Derek said I was cute, what do you think I should wear tonight? What would he like? ”, I smiled devilishly. Although I did not get the response I wanted from him, He took his sweet time to put syrup on his pancakes, then dabbed his mouth with the napkin. He even checked his phone. I was about to say it again when he stood up, bending to my eye level, putting his face so close to mine.

“She said eight thirty right?”, he whispered with a threatening tone, I nodded my head. “That is ten hours and seventeen minutes away, predicting it’ll take you two hours to get ready, plus forty minutes of travel, adding to that thirty minutes for lunch, and twenty for other mundane activities. That leaves us with what? six hours and forty seven minutes for me to make sure that the only thing you can wear tonight is a long sleeve turtleneck, and pants. I do not know what Morgan would like you to wear. But I will make sure when he undresses you he finds my fingerprints all over your sweet sweet body. He won’t even need forensic samples to know that every teeth mark, every hickey, every scratch was done by me ”, he calmly smiled, as if the words he had just said were the weather. He placed a soft kiss in my lips, as he sat back down, going back to eat.

His phone rang and he picked it up. “Hey!, Yeah tonight? sure, Ok Jaje, love you too”, he hung his phone up, sipping from his coffee. I stayed there open mouthed waiting for the air to come back to my lungs. He looked at me with that warm smile again.

“I hate you Dr Reid”, I stated, going back to my breakfast.

“Sure you do”, he said, a smile creeping on my lips, my face definitely as pink as the raspberries in front of me.


	6. Chapter 6

These could be the most comfortable I felt around people in a long time. At the end I had wore a high necked beige dress, with a golden belt around my waist. It was shorter than what I normally wore. Since it didn’t have any sleeves I threw in a long coat, that I actually didn’t need at the restaurant, so it had been forgotten in the coat closer.

“Phobias are a common form of anxiety disorder, and distributions are heterogeneous by age and gender. An American study by the National Institute of Mental Health found that between 8.7 percent and 18.1 percent of Americans suffer from phobias, making it the most common mental illness among women in all age groups and the second most common illness among men older than 25. Between 4 percent and 10 percent of all children experience specific phobias during their lives, and social phobias occur in one percent to three percent of children and adolescents.”, the man next to me said. finally catching a breath. 

Did love make you deaf? well no, no love, did attraction make you deaf? did he always talk this much.

“Okay, drink”, I said, serving him more wine, he looked reluctant at first but then drank the whole thing. It was in my best interest though, for him not to drink. See, the more he drank the more unhinged he became. It started with him brushing up my leg, then my inner thigh. Then resting his hand on my thigh when I had put a stop to that. I’ve been trying to pry the hand away. Then he had tried to kiss my cheek, to which I’m thankful I could pretend I dropped something. Still, if he stopped drinking now it’ll look suspicious. And both of us had talked about how it was for the best not to talk about your relationship. He had actually used the word relationship, which was surprising. 

“She asked”, he blurred.

“I so did not”, emily had a horrified burrowed eyebrow face.

“Kid, she said that she thought she saw a snake in a lake and freaked out”, Rossi said same expression.

The whole table laughed now, not with malice though, just some light banter.

“Spence there are better ways to get drunk”, JJ said, to which Spencer laughed now too.

“So anyway, I’m there, like literally yelling bloody murder, and my mom is terrified right? My friend just decides that he is going to be the hero of the story and jump!”, Emily continued her story… 

Yet my mind could not concentrate, I was too busy with the hand on my thigh. He apparently thought it was a good idea to sneakily get an ice cube from the table and rub it on my leg. I shot a glance at him, my body shivering.

“You okay?”, Derek, who was sitting next to me asked. 

“Yeah”, I smiled, prying his hand away from me. I could see from the corner of my eye his cheeky smile. I heard the ice cube hit the ground.

“Wait, who finished the bottle?”, Derek said, serving him and Hotchner wine.

The whole table looked around, everyone had already been drinking, and since there was no intention to stop Rossi called the waitress.

“We probably need more wine”, He said flashing the woman a smile.

“I am so sorry sir, but the policy says that after certain amount we need to get a card for a tab”, she pointed at the bar behind us. “We can also close your previous check and start a new one.”

“Ok, that’s fine”, Will said for the group. “so the check will split in…”, he started counting heads.

“No actually”, I said loudly enough to get the attention now, “Everything in this card please”, I handed her a card. “Close the tab and open a new one? I will say one bottle of the red, one of the white, as well as some more bread?”, I smiled at her.

“Hey”, Garcia looked surprised.

“That’s very kind”, Kevin said, he was Garcia’s boyfriend and honestly adorable as her. I was happy to meet him, that woman deserves everything pure and good in life.

“(y/n) is not necessary”, Hotch said, looking slightly confused as to why I would pay a bill for everyone. Everyone had full course meals and a lot to drink. 

“C’mon is fine”, I waved at the waitress.

“Ok, Ms”, she read the card “Harley, I will be getting your card to the bartender.”

“Harley?”, everyone said in unison, turning to face me, ok that had backfired.

“(y/l/n), Harley?....”, Rossi said, something in his mind clicked. “Are you… are you Donna’s and Victor’s daughter?”, he asked, in pure surprise.

“Yeah…” I rubbed the back of my neck.

“Victor Harley?”, He asked, you nodded.

“Victor Harley The Hawk?”, Morgan asked.

“Oh no”, Garcia said in recognition.

“Who is Victor Harley?” Kevin asked confused.

“He is a lawyer, he is known for…”, JJ stopped, eyeing me like she did not want to say it.

“He terrifies me, I met him once”, William said.

“He is a monster”, I said, in a very casual tone, “Known for getting criminals out of jail, and having some really questionable people walk free. Don’t worry guys, I hate my father as much as anyone with morals does”, I shrugged. the tension seemed to lift.

“You look nothing like him”, Hotch pointed out, to which everyone seemed to agree.

“You look like Donna”, Rossi said.

“You knew my mom?”, I asked, smiling now, he nodded his head.

“Wait why didn’t you tell me your dad was the hawk?”, Spencer finally said, Morgan eyed him confusedly. “I hate your dad”, he said that much closer to my face now, like if he wanted to whisper it but couldn’t. I push him back to his seat chuckling. Trying to get everyone’s attention on me.

“Because I like to forget the fact myself”, I said, prying his hand away one more time. He put it immediately back, I just sighed and let him.

“Wait what is the story?”, Emily asked, leaning on the table.

“Yes, I do not like gossip but c’mon, you don’t even use his last name?”, Garcia said surprised.

“Guys…”, Hotch started, like a father telling their kids not to talk about the topic.

“It’s okay.”, I said waving him off, “I don’t mind telling it. Okay so you guys might know Johnny my brother right?” It was true, it wasn’t like it was a secret, there was nothing I was ashamed of.

“Ugh”, Emily said rolling her eyes. I nodded in agreement.

“Exactly. So he was born five years before me, he was everything that my dad wanted. Well he is everything my dad wants, a mirror of himself. He only wanted one kid, my mom wanted another one. When she got pregnant with me my dad decided that he was not my father, saying the kid was not his. He got even worse when he realized that I was going to be a girl, of course. So my mom lived in Italy during her pregnancy, moving back to Arlington to have me. My dad still out of the picture, too angry to even see me for the first year of my life. Then my mom got Cancer, she died two years later, not before sending my dad the DNA test he so clearly didn’t want to see”, I took a sip of wine. “So I move here to DC with him, well not with him, I lived most of my childhood with babysitters and nannies. I don’t know, I will not complain completely. He did give me a great education. He paid for my university, he still gave me this card. But as soon as I turn twenty five in three months and my trust releases I will forever forget that my father is my dad.”

Everyone looked like they wanted to say something.

“If I had known Donna’s kid was out there, I would’ve…”, Rossi said, lacking the words.

“I don’t remember my mom, but I have some old pictures, I will see if I can find any with you in it”, I smiled sweetly at the man, clearly more moved remembering my mom than I.

“Let me tell you, I’m surprised you turned out like this”, Garcia said sounded impressed, the whole group just looked at her reprehendetly. 

“what?”, I asked, slightly confused.

“That you did not adapt a fem fatale style. Although not always most kids with roughly a same background adapt a more rebellious lifestyle. You just turned out sweet”, Spencer said sipping from his drink. “And adorable”, he finished, making me blush. Spencer looked like if he wasn’t propping his head up he would fall at any minute.

“Yeah well…” I rubbed the back of my neck

“So this card, he gave it to you?”, Hotch asked, I knew exactly what it looked like.

“I know. It feels good to spend a chunk of his money, although I know it won’t even put a dent in his pocket. I like to spite him by using it a lot. Is that wrong?” Everyone seemed to consider that for a moment, shaking their heads in agreement with me. “Besides, my dad is absent, still I’m legally obligated to get a trust, I guess grandpa’s rules. This is a way for him to not get a lawsuit, although I wouldn’t do it of course. I’m not a digger I promise.” I smiled.

“NO! I would’ve bought myself a mansion and four boats already”, Emily said.

“So the Hawk is paying, I should have ordered the lobster”, Morgan said, making everyone laugh, even Spencer, who in a moment of pure stupidity pulled his hand out of the table from right in front of me. 

“What was that?”, Morgan asked quickly 

“What?”, Emily asked confused.

“OK baby girl”, Morgan was facing me completely now. “You have another story you want to tell us?”

“Nope”, I said innocently.

“Boy wonder, what is going on?”, Spencer had his elbow on the table, propping his head up and looking at me. My face melted at seeing him, how could I not? he had stars in his eyes. He was the cutest thing to grace this land. He was looking at me like you were sharing the same thought. Apparently that last glass of wine did him in.

“Nothing”, He mumbled, his eyes still glued on me.

“Spence, are you and (y/n)”, JJ started.

“Oh my God Spencer”, Garcia said excitedly.

“We are not… we are… no”, I started. Trying to find the correct combination of words, we are not dating but we are fucking and I might be falling for the boy but I do not want to think about it because I’ve never been in love before?

“Ok, I think Reid has had enough to drink”, Hotch said, clearly trying to save both of us, was he an angel?

“Hey buddy, let me take you home”, Morgan stood up, walking to his side.

“NO”, his voice was so high it was adorable. “I’m going home with (y/n)”, he said, sending Emily into a fit of giggles.

“Hey Spencer, I think Morgan should take you home alright?”, I said sweetly, forgetting the people around us. All that mattered was him right now.

“Morgan no, I want to be with her”, he said pointing at me. I chewed on my lip, expecting him to just pass out so that Morgan could take him.

“He normally doesn’t get this drunk”, JJ said standing up and walking towards him.

“JJ!”, he said excitedly.

“Hey Spence, why don’t you go with Derek? I think you should go to sleep”, she said sweetly, clearly having done this with Henry several times.

“You are my best friend”, He said smiling.

“Hey!”, Morgan complained, his arm around Spencer.

“I like her JJ”, he puckered his lips now. He totally meant to say it as a secret. 

“Hey Spencer”, I called him, when his eyes met mine I felt the way my heart stopped. I was utterly fucked. “Why don’t we go home?” He nodded now, letting Morgan prop him up.

“Well guys I think that this is the end of the night for us. Thank you for inviting me out.”, I said standing up as well.

“You ended up paying, next time our treat”, Rossi stood up and went around the table to give me a quick hug. “If you need anything kiddo”, I nodded my head, waving goodbye as Derek dragged Spencer out. 

“Finally”, Derek eyed Spencer who was now snoring softly in the back seat.

I looked back at him. We had been in the road for thirty minutes. He hadn’t stop talking. Morgan asked whose house, and when I said I would probably go to mine and he to his he lost it. Threatening to get out of the car. Alas I had agreed to go to his house, it wasn’t like I didn’t want to. It was that I would have rather he asked me in a much different state. Still when Morgan started driving he started talking about how he had chosen a bad route, and how the streets of Washington came to be. Then about tourists and the economy, then about the history of the coin. Thing is the boy had talked for thirty minutes and now we both had a headache.

“Hey I’m sorry if I called you both out. I was surprised I’ve never seen him with anyone”, He said sincerely.

“It’s okay. You were surprised?”, I said, it was impossible to believe that Spencer Reid didn’t have the woman crawling around him.

“No, everytime someone flirts with him he is so clueless”, he laughed, probably remembering something. “There was a case involving an actress, she practically launched herself at him and he didn’t realize until she kissed him”, he said looking at the man. It was obvious that he loved Spencer, good, Spencer deserved to be surrounded by people who cared about him.

An actress uh? I looked through the window. How could the Spencer I know be so timid? So unaware of how amazing he was?

“(y/n), I have a question.” Derek said eyeing me.

“Yeah”, I looked at him.

“Did he go to your house on Tuesday, after a case”, he asked, eyeing him again.

“Yeah…”, I said looking at him. “How did you know?”, He shook his head, but there was no way I was going to let it go. “You have to tell me now”.

“I shouldn’t”, he said softly.

“Please? I was wondering why he was there anyway, please tell me”, I said, fidgeting with my fingers.

“I’m, well, known for having more than one female friend”, He smirked, I gave him a small chuckle. “well, he asked me how I knew which girls were different. Don’t get me wrong I don’t get with girls if I don’t respect them first.” That made you smile, he probably was trying to cover his ass. Still Morgan didn’t come across as nothing short of a gentleman.

“Sure”, I said sarcastically, he laughed.

“Well, I told him, none of them had ever made me want to run to them you know? Like after a case, I never want to run home to them. I always want to go home and stay there alone until I’m ready to go out again”, he explained, looking at me waiting for the words to soak. 

I stayed quiet, a smile on my face as he parked in front of the building. He helped him and guided me to his apartment. Once we were inside I stayed in the living room for long enough for him to place him on the bed. I looked around, there were so many books, amongst other things. Puzzles, different kinds of what seemed to be rubik's cubes. A small table designated for a chess board.

“I am not undressing him.”, Morgan called me in. His room smelled of wood, and old books, and coffee. It smelled of him, everything about it was warm. I smiled seeing him sprawled on the bed. “I’ll leave you kids”, He smiled walking to Spencer.

“Hey kid look at me”, he took his face with one hand, squeezing his cheeks, I smiled watching them. The only answer he got from Spencer was a hum.

“Morgan”, he said cheery.

“Listen to me, you take care of her alright?”, he guided his face to look at me. “Don’t you dare break her heart.”

My whole body tried to hide behind my crossed arms. Derek walked out of the room.

“Hey Morgan”, I called the man when he walked next to me.

“Yeah baby girl?”, he asked smiling.

“Thank you”, I said softly

“Thank you”, he eyed Spencer and then me, a bright smile planting on his face before leaving.

After changing myself into an oversized shirt from his closet I decided to start the task of undressing him. Task that turned out to be a workout. Every time my fingers even brushed against his skin he tried to pull me into his laps. Once I finally put his bottoms, I decided to give up with a shirt. It wasn’t going to happen. I just crawled on top of him he half opened his eyes.

“Finally”, he smiled.

“Do not think I will have sex with you in this state”, I laughed, giving him a kiss, one that he actually replied to.

“I don’t want to have sex, I want to sleep with you”, He sighed on my lips.

“okay, let’s sleep then”, I continued kissing him. 

I knew he was drunk, I was not going to let him do anything. I just wanted to kiss him, I wanted him to know, through my actions the painful truth. The truth that I was spiraling out of control. You know how in every relationship you are constantly wondering what was next? With him I knew, I knew that I would never kiss someone with as much need as I did him right now. He kissed me back, his hands now on my hair. He pulled my lips slowly and I looked down at him.

“You have shattered all my defenses”, he said, looking right through me. 

“And you have mine Dr. Reid”, I answered, accepting his embrace.


	7. Chapter 7

“Yes, say it”, he prompted.

“Dr Reid”, I practically yelled, my knees about to give out on me. “Please.”

That seemed to be enough for him to help me now, guiding my hips up and down in a frantic manner. When I finally found the release I couldn’t hold it any longer, I fell on him, feeling his member so deep in me. I shivered feeling the activities of the last thirty minutes finally take a toll on my body. Once I knew he was finished and he had exited me, I let myself fall backwards on the bed, my knees still bended. I was laying in between his legs.

“Look at you all pretty”, he said, he had been sitting and he prompted himself up to get on top of me.

“Thank you”, I could barely breathe, I smiled when he gave me a small kiss. with his hands and a towel he delicately wiped between my legs. Throwing the towel we had used to protect the bed spread on the floor. We had discovered from a rip on the bed sheets from one too many washes that it was best for us to find other ways to avoid making a mess. It had been three weeks ago, the day after the dinner. 

After the post orgasmic bliss died out he sat in the bed again, putting his boxers and pulling his laptop to his lap. I sat next to him, taking the newspaper I had been working on and a pencil. Life with Spencer was easy, although we had not actually labeled whatever was happening between us. It was a Sunday and we had woken up extra early for whatever reason, for a moment it was just him and I in the world. in our own little bubble.

“That’s wrong”, he eyed my work.

“No”, I simply said continuing putting numbers.

“It is, a five there doesn’t make sense”, he furrowed his eyebrows thinking.

“You are doing homework, I am doing my sudoku”, I said hiding my work from him. Yes, I liked doing the sudoku, it was fun.

“Technically I am not doing homework, I am revising my Professor’s lectures”, He said, pursing his lips.

“Aren’t you cocky?”, I stated distractedly.

“Well sometimes he is wrong, I just need to make sure he isn’t”, he shrugged.

“So you are smarter than the professor”, I said.

“I have an eidetic memory, that helps me make sure he is not changing any of the data from the books.”

“You are a nerd”, I said this time looking up at him, his mouth opened in disbelief.

“What did you call me Miss (y/l/n)?”, he asked, putting his laptop away carefully. He also took off his damn glasses, those things were the reason we crawled back to bed after breakfast in the first place.

“A nerd”, I said challenging, I recognized that voice. Surely he couldn’t be ready for round two right?

“That is not a nice word”, He said kneeling on the bed, pulling me down to him. he was on all fours on top of me. I smiled innocently now.

“Can I say sorry?”, I fanned my eyelashes at him.

“You will”, He said coming down very slowly. 

“Nerd”, I whispered right before our lips met.

“Is that what you think?”

Then his phone interrupted us, because of course it did. I closed my eyes as he reached for his phone. Part of me begged that it wasn’t his job. I just wanted him with me today, is that too much to ask.

“Hey, yes, is everything okay?”, his eyes met mine. “okay give me a second”, he muted his phone.

“JJ, she says Henry is a little fuzzy today, Garcia went to NYC with Kevin, she is asking if I can babysit until she is done running errands”, he explained, I exhaled in relief. “Do you want to babysit with me?”, he asked sweetly

“Sure, she can drop him off here if you want”, I said smiling.

He put his phone back on his ear, “Yeah JJ? I’m at (y/n)’s place just come and drop him off here. Yeah, I will send you the address.”, He said into the receiver before hanging up, typing something and putting his phone back on the nightstand.

I smiled looking at him, he looked back at me. 

“I will try to finish this before my Godson gets here”, he said, I nodded my head. 

“Of course Dr Reid”, I said standing up. I walked towards the bathroom covered with one of his sweaters. “Hey Doctor”, I called as I walked in.

“Yeah”, he looked up at me, smiling when his eyes met mine.

“Here’s something for your eidetic memory”, I simply let uncovered my body, before I hurriedly got in the bathroom and locked the door.

“You’ll pay”, he exclaimed from the bed. 

After the quick shower I decided to put a V neck white shirt tucked in some high waisted black jeans. When Spencer got out of the bathroom already changed he eyed me up and down, as if confused.

“What?”, I snickered, he got closer to me, looking at my outfit. “I own more than skirts and dresses you know”, I said when I finally understood the reason of his stares.

“I know”, he said running his hands on my thighs. “I just like it when I can touch you.”

“Yeah that is exactly why I’m wearing this”, and that was the truth, the man just seemed to go crazy every time he could get his hands up my skirt. Or any parts of my body. 

“That seems like a punishment”, he tilted his head.

“Me not letting you get your hands up my skirt is punishment?”, I asked imitating his gesture. He nodded like it was obvious. “You are just…”, I smiled when he pulled me close to him.

“Just what?”, he asked kissing me. Then, in a very us fashion the knocking in the door interrupted. 

“Guys you have no idea how you two just saved us”, She handed Henry to Spencer, the kid simply snuggled on his chest, he had been crying.

“Hey”, he soothed, walking inside with him.

“No problem”, I said, she had handed me the bag with stuff I might need.

“He didn’t want to cooperate today, and we needed to run some errands.”, she brushed her hair back.

“Hey, it’s okay, it happens even to the best of kids. You let us know before you come to pick him up”, I smiled warmly, which seemed to calm her down.

“Yeah I will try to make it here before dinner, is there anything I can do for you? Can I get you anything from the grocery store?” she asked.

“No, I’m fine”, I reassured her.

“Thank you, thank you”, she said again walking to her car where William looked exhausted. “Bye baby I love you”, she exclaimed, Henry was a couple of steps back, perching on his Uncle’s arms.

I closed the door and walked in, Spencer putting Henry on a bar stool, where the kid dangled his legs. 

“Where are we?”, he said finally noticing his surroundings. “Miss (y/l/n)!” He said excitedly, I smiled at him getting closer. He was on one of his stubborns moods I’ve seen it.

“hey buddy, how are you?”, he hugged me around the waist. I smiled running my hand through his hair.

“Is this your house?”, he finally said. He looked like he was considering something. “Where is he?”, he asked now jumping on his seat.

“Hey”, I picked him up before he fell from the chair. 

“Where is Goofy?”, he tilted his head. I had shown them pictures of the dog in class, I smiled.

“He is outside, want to come say hi?”, the kid nodded enthusiastically. 

I walked with him in my arms outside, as much as I trusted Henry, and as much as I trusted Goof it was not wise to let a kid and a dog play alone. I noticed Spencer following us from a distance. Once we were outside he came with us. Probably knowing that I would need help.

It took about fifteen minutes for dog and child to calm down before we could play some fetch with Goofy, Henry was delighted every time he had the ball back on his hands. At this point I was sitting on a patio chair and had the kid on my lap. Spencer had refused to be near the ball at all. We played there for a minutes before the game became repetitive and the dog decided to instead chase squirrels.

“I’ll go get some coffee:, Spencer placed a kiss on the kids forehead and on mine. I was thankful he left. The way he was looking at us was almost painful. I remembered that one night. We had been careful after that night. He had pretty much memorized my cycle, making sure to always be protected on the high risks days, as for the other days...

“He is very cute”, Henry threw his hands in the air.

“I know”, I said smiling, “Time to go wash our hands”, I picked him up walking inside. 

“... Twenty seven, Twenty eight, twenty nine… thirty”, I announced when he had gotten all the soap off his hands. I dried them carefully with a paper towel.

“Uncle Spencer, did you wash your hands for thirty seconds?”, Henry brough his hands to his hips, eliciting a chuckle from his uncle.

“Of course buddy”, Spencer said smiling.

“Let me see”, he reached his hands out. Spencer laughed but still he walked towards us, offering his hands. The kid took a very dramatic inhale as he brought his uncle’s hands to his nose. “Yes”, he said, as if the smell told him whether the hands were clean or not. 

“Here”, Spencer offered me a mug.

“Do you want anything Henry?”, I offered.

“Coffe”, the kid said in a very confident manner.

“You know you cannot have coffee”, I said, walking towards the fridge. All the kids had gone through a phase in which the only thing they were interested in was the content of the thermos in your hands during class, after that you switched to drinking tea instead.

“Uncle Spencer gives me coffee all the time”, honestly the kid sounded annoyed. 

I put the apple juice down on the counter. Meeting Spencer’s eyes who looked like the kid had revealed his biggest secrets.

“You, do, what?”, I said, my lips on a straight line.

“I gave him a sip of a blended Mocha once”, his voice was higher, he looked at Henry then at me a couple of times. “Henry”, his voice got even higher. 

The kid chuckled now, obviously knowing he wasn’t supposed to say anything.

“What did I tell you that coffee has”, he asked, the kid brought a finger to his chin thinking. I smiled watching them, no wait I should be mad. “Caf…”, he started helping the kid.

“Cafen”, He said again confidently.

“Caffeine”, Spencer corrected, “and you cannot have any you remember that right?”

“But you said I could be like you when I grew up, and you drink a lot of coffee”, Henry said almost like a plea.

My heart shrunk, my hand without me thinking went to my lower stomach where it rested.

“I shouldn’t”, he said, “Caffeine is a highly addi… it is very easy to want more of”, he said choosing his words.

“Like candy?”, Henry smiled now, bouncing on his feet.

“Yeah like candy”, the man said now poking his nose with a finger. “Now tell Miss (y/l/n) what you want to drink. They both faced me, the kid eyeing the open fridge behind me, and Spencer’s eyes traveling to where my hand was resting, I quickly put it away.

“HHHHMMMM, I would like one apple juice please”, He said putting one finger up, eyeing the cartons behind me.

“Sure sweetheart, thank you for asking nicely”, I said breaking one from the pack and giving it to him.

“You are welcome”, he nodded proudly. Clearly the manners class last week had been successful. 

“Uncle Spencer”, The kid said, pulling his uncle down to where he was sitting, the man was hovering on top of him as he ate cookies with his juice.

“Yeah buddy?”, Spencer asked taking his eyes away from his phone.

“Why are we in Miss (y/l/n)’s place?”, the kid asked now confusedly.

I had been cutting some veggies for lunch, I looked up to them from across the kitchen isle.

“Well, your mom told me you wanted to hang out with me, and I was here”, Spencer explained rubbing his hair messy. The kid giggled.

“Why?”, The kid asked trying to brush his hair back.

“Because, well because we are friends”, Spencer said smiling up at me. I smiled back.

It was okay I was okay, it’s not like I was fantasizing on having his kids pfft me? never.

“Henry”, he squatted just a little to meet his eyes. “Me and Miss (y/l/n) are dating”, he started explaining. 

The kid look confused between his Uncle’s face and mine. I dropped what I was doing, a knot on my stomach.

“Like girlfriend and boyfriend?”, he tried making sense.

“Yeah, she is my girlfriend”, Spencer smiled now, looking my way.

“So you kiss her?”, the kid said horrified. Spencer sucked his lips in trying to contain his laughter.

“That’s ew”, he simply said before going back to his cookies.

“Very ew”, I said going back to cutting carrots, now with a big grin on my face. Spencer just scoffed.

“Uncle Spencer, are you and Miss (y/l/n) married?”, the kid asked after putting his apple juice on the counter.

“No… we are not married”, he said, the kid seemed to be thinking something. 

“My mommy says that a girlfriend and boyfriend get married, that she and daddy got married”, he explained this in the same tone Spencer had before, nodding his head.

“Well, we are not married, but eventually...”, he started.

“Eventually?”, Henry and I said at the same time, I bit my tongue.

“Yeah…”

“What’s eventually?”, The kid asked clearly trying to find the meaning on his brain.

“It means some day, in the future”, Spencer’s eyes met mine now, I smiled shyly.

“Good”, the kid seemed to like that answer. “Jack and I play hide and seek, but when he finds me the game is over. We need another cousin to make the game longer”, he said absentmindedly.

While I was standing there feeling like a train hit me head on.

“Ok, but it’ll take time”, Spencer said, oh God someone shut this man up.

“Well Henry, you have to be very patient”, I said walking to them. “In the meantime your uncle could play with you guys”, I prompted, revenge was sweet. Once you got a kid thinking something it would not end.

Instead of an excited response I got a grimace and a head shake from the kid. “He is too tall”, Henry explained looking up at me.

I laughed now, as Spencer hugged me close to him.

“He really is uh?”, I asked, Spencer rested his chin on the top of my head. I could feel his needy hands rubbing my arms.

I leaned back looking at the kid. So unaware that he had just made me have a whole panic attack.

Spencer offered to finish making lunch, he wasn’t necessarily thrilled that the three of us would have mac and cheese and a small veggie salad. 

The kid was FUSSY, his mom wasn’t kidding. He had questioned every single thing laid on the plate in front of him. Spencer had had the patient to explain why each thing was important for his development. Listing vitamins and making him laugh once in a while. After like forty five minutes he finally finished his plate.

“You are great at this”, I told Spencer while he loaded the dishwasher.

“You think?”, he eyed the kid, who was now playing with a very sleepy Goof.

“Yeah, I always noticed Henry’s vocabulary was more advanced, and I think you have a lot to do with it. When you talk to kids in a normal way they learn faster”, I said, I was disinfecting the surfaces, because God forbid a single square inch went without deep cleaning.

“When JJ was pregnant I read fifty eight books on pregnancy and child development”, he pursed his lips. “I still think they make it look so much easier”, he chuckled.

“For sure, try to have a room with twenty of those”, I smiled remembering my babies.

“I will try not to”, he said walking towards the kid, I laughed.

“Let’s watch a movie”, Henry said now sitting on the couch.

“Are you sure you don’t want to take a nap?”, He asked looking at the very looking tired kid on the couch.

“Nuh uh”, the kid said.

“What movie do you want to watch?”, I asked, walking to the tv and grabbing the remote.

“Frozen”, he said cheerily.

“Frozen?”, Spencer said, “Is that a Disney movie?”

“Musical”, I said smiling, his face showing pure horror.

He sat on the couch and Henry quickly climbed on his laps. I sat next to them on the opposite end of the couch before he gestured me to get closer. In one arm he was grabbing Henry and the other he draped around my shoulders.

We had decided on Frozen two, since it was newer. I explained to Spencer the plot of the first one, he nodded solemnly, not knowing what to do with the information he clearly had not asked for. Well that is called Karma Doctor, I thought. Still he kissed my cheek when I had finished.

Let me tell you something about Frozen, the songs are good. They make you want to sing, which is what Henry and I did when Into The Unknown started playing. The songs were good, one or two times. By the fifth time Henry had excitedly clapped and said he wanted to listen to it again Spencer had told him he wanted to watch what happened.

He didn’t seem at all concerned by our faces, the faces of two people who had listened to Into the unknown five times in a row, it just wasn’t human.

Once that very hard experience ended the movie went without much fuss, Kristoff was singing now on the screen. You laughed watching the scene.

“I like him”, Spencer said concentrating.

“Oh yeah, he is super sweet.”, I said smiling.

Spencer looked at me before planting a chaste kiss on my lips. I smiled up at him.

By the time the climax of the movie was coming to an end Henry was snoring softly on Spencer’s chest.

After he woke from his nap it was all games trying to tire him up again. JJ had said she was on her way. She offered to buy the two of us Dinner as a thank you. We had accept it, neither of us looking eager to prepare dinner,

“Oh God” she laughed.

“Your son”, Spencer said handing sleepy Henry to WIlliam.

“Thank you guys so much”, William said smiling, planting a kiss on his son’s cheek.

“Was he difficult?” JJ asked once William walked to the car.

“He was fine”, I said, Spencer nodded.

“It’s Garcia’s turn next time right?”, he asked, JJ laughed again nodding. “Good”, he chuckled now.

“I will see you guys later, I need to get my two kids to bed”, she said handing us a paper bag.

“Good night”, Spencer hugged her before she left.

I was brushing my teeth on the sink when Spencer walked into the bathroom, Hugging me from behind.

“Hmmm”, I hummed contently leaning in on his touch.

“You know how happy I am that you are mine?”, he sighed on my ear. I smiled. He was wearing his pj’s now. 

Spencer had slowly settled at my place, it started with a sweater that he left, I had washed it and put it in a cabinet. Then slowly that cabinet got filled with his belongings. The same thing had happened at his place with my things. 

“Yours”, I said, feeling his hand travel my body.

“I hate when I can’t touch you.” He started running his hands inside my shirt.

“Doctor Reid, you should learn about self control”, joked, my hands all over his.

“Look at yourself”, he guided my face to the mirror. “How do you expect me to show any sign on self control when you look like that. Knowing that you are all mine. I’ve discovered every single nook and cranny of your body, yet I’m still in awe every time I feel it again. ”

I blushed, feeling his hand meeting my breasts. I moaned softly. Feeling his hips persistent on my back

“So sweet, so easy to need, so easy to love”, My heart skipped a beat once again. The word was out there, it couldn’t be taken back. Honestly it had been a lot less terrifying now. 

“I need you Spencer”, I whispered He guided me to the bedroom.

Once inside he took his time undressing me, making sure to place kisses on each inch of my uncovered body. When my turn had come he still guided my face to his, kissing me tenderly.

He laid me down in the bed, in the softest manner he could. My hands seeked his when he reached for the box on the nightstand.

“I need you Spencer”, I repeated the words. When realization washed over on his face he met his lips with mine one more time. 

The pace was slow, it was careful. This was not screwing, this wasn’t sex, it was love.

I sighed on his lips when we both met our orgams at the same time. He stayed there though, not moving an inch. Kissing my lips. 

“I did tell you not to be kind to me, you won’t be able to take me back, ever”, he said locking eyes with me.

“I don’t want to, ever.”

I would follow this man to the depths of hell if that meant his kisses won’t stop.


	8. Chapter 8

Right before I was falling asleep on his arms, I thought ‘life cannot get any better than this’.

Turns out it cannot. Do you ever have a week in which anything that can go wrong will and does go wrong?

Let me start. Monday I woke up at the sound of Spencer’s phone ringing. Turns out a prisoner on death row was finally going to speak, he and Aaron needed to leave immediately. So he had packed his bags and gone to Texas. That is fine, I can live without him for a couple of days. That morning I had decided to put on a white dress that I had been excited to wear. Of course a white dress and a classroom full of children did not mix, but I hadn’t even made it out the door. When I stood up after eating breakfast I saw the pool of blood I was sitting in. I had gotten my period. The day was just me wailing in cramps trying to do my job.

Tuesday right after school I got home to the smell of bile, turns out goof had eaten something on his walk to the park and had gotten sick. I drove e him to the vet and stayed there until around ten PM when he was as good as new. I was grateful he was okay, still the cleaning process was a pain. I was exhausted and to be honest Spencer rubs off on people. I had found myself disinfecting with the strongest chemicals I could. Of course if Spencer was here he would’ve read the labels and I would have avoided getting light headed. 

Wednesday I had a couple of parent-teacher meetings. People do not like talking about what their children needed to improve. I tried as hard as I could to teach them but there were some things that required out of school practice. I had repeated practice makes perfect at least a thousand times. With Dads yelling about my incompetence to teach, and moms yelling about my inefficiency. 

Thursday had been just magnificent. The train had a malfunction which trapped us for forty minutes. My boss was on a very bad mood and almost wrote me up. Jason had said how he didn’t feel good, he and his boyfriend had gotten out to eat last night. The kids were on one of those stubborn moods which didn’t help. And as I was walking home my small heel broke bending my ankle.

Finally today, I woke up praying that it would be better. It was too much to ask, very early as I was starting my lecture a kid stood up and told me they didn’t feel good. I pulled them closer to me to ask what was happening before he projectile vomited on my dress. Which of course made several other kids follow. We had to call all the parents and send everyone home. I was on the bathroom getting change. Something you learn working with children is that you need a change of clothes in the classroom. Thankfully my reflexes made me move before anything else happened, it was mainly the lower part of my skirt. I was placing the clothing on a bag when my phone started ringing. It was the cherry of the cake, the owners of the building I parked my car in. I needed to go get it because the building next door was undergoing emergency construction.

Why did I own a car? I don’t know. I had gotten it when I was in college, but it was pointless. I didn’t needed in New York, where I had studied, or here. I rode the train or bus most of the time. It took less time anyway since I avoided traffic. On top of that I was a bad driver, very bad driver. At least I had found a parking spot right in front of my house. I rested my head on the steering wheel. Breathing the AC and listening to the music loudly playing on the radio. I had finally made it home, and it was a Friday. My class was excused from going Monday because of the stomach bug, my own stomach turned thinking about it. I breathed heavily as the song changed. I missed Spencer, I didn’t want to be dependant on him, but on days like these I needed him near. He would’ve said something funny about everything, or told me statistics and facts about the possibilities of everything happening to me. He would’ve put a stop to my thinking that I might be curse, instead showing me data.

Now that was something I never had considered cute or romantic, but now it was. The only highlights of my days were when he called late at night, he didn’t ask much, neither did I. He just wanted to hear me fall asleep on the phone, so did I.

I heard a knocking on the glass, quickly sitting up I saw the culprit. A smile finally drew on my face as I rolled the window down.

“(y/n)? What are you doing here?”, he asked confusedly, leaning inside.

“Contemplating”, I simply said getting out of the car and walking around it. Before he walked towards me for a hug I stopped him with my hand. “A couple of kids came down with a bug, I don’t think I have it but still”. I explained, I don’t know if he looked at my eye bags or the tiredness of my body, but he pulled me in for a hug.

“That’s okay”, He kissed the top of my head. “I missed you way too much to care about it”, he said rubbing my cheek with his thumb, I looked up at him relaxing on his arms.

“Rough week?”, he asked still not letting me go.

“Awful, how was yours?”, I asked. He probably had a lot worse week than mine, I didn’t want to be complaining when I understood the gravity of his job.

“It was informative, We got useful information for research. I just wanted to come home though”, he said, finally meeting my lips with his. I let that tender kiss clean everything that had week brought.

The words I wanted to say were, please don’t leave me again, but that was straight up selfish and unrealistic. Instead I just hugged him tighter, letting the way his lips felt on my forehead be enough.

“Did you eat yet?”, he asked separating himself from me and eyeing my body. I bit my lip, knowing he wouldn’t like to know I ate ice cream for dinner two nights in a row. I was extremely hungry.

“No, did you?”, I asked avoiding his eyes.

“No, I was going to your place and cook for us, but”, he said taking my hand and kissing the back of it. “What do you say we go for a walk and grab something to eat?”

I smiled at him. “Like a date?”, we hadn’t had a real date, which was stupid, but neither of us had complained yet.

“Yes, like a date”, he rolled his eyes playfully. How could I tell this man that I loved him so much without actually saying it? “Do you need to go home?”, he asked.

“No, Abby still has goof, I’ll text her.”, I pulled my phone out of my purse.

“Do you want to take your car?”, he asked.

“No, please”, He chuckled at the horror of my voice.

“Let’s walk”, he said taking my hand. It meant more than he realized, I knew he didn’t like PDA, yet here we were, talking about our weeks while our fingers intertwined between us.

Going on a date with Spencer Reid was as good as life got right? We had chosen a very casual dinner, we sat across each other on the booth. Ordered some burgers and shakes, our feet touching as we talked about life, he was telling me about his education, how he went to college at fourteen, I told him about mine, how I had a rebellious phase in NYC.

“The big city, everyone has their moments”, I defended myself.

“I just cannot picture you a party girl”, he shook his head. “You are wearing a vintage dress right now and sipping from a vanilla shake”, he said laughing. Shoving a couple of fries on his mouth.

“I will need to show you some of the clothes I wore”, I laughed too, remembering the nights when I stayed out so late that I just showed to class straight from the pub. I had a very close group of friends and we liked to have fun nights, not your typical party nights but nights in which we talked until the sun came out in a bar.

We decided to hit the financial district afterwards, it was one of the perks of cities like this. Everything was opened all the time. Spencer was explaining the history of the streets we were walking on, talking about how the city was built and slipping some fun facts in between. I did not mind it one bit, just listening to him. The streets were full of both locals and tourist enjoying the warmth of the night.

“As much as I would love to listen to the economy, I need to go to the restroom”, I said, pointing at the public restroom sign.

“Ok, go, I’ll wait here”, He smiled letting my hand go.

I looked at myself in the mirror as I washed my hands. How could someone get this lucky? How could I get a boy who loved me as much as I loved him? How could boy wonder, genius, Doctor Spencer Reid be with me? I smiled widely exiting the area when my eyes saw something I did not want to see.

In front of Spencer there was a pretty blonde, playing with her hair on one hand while the other caressed his arm. I could only see his back but he did not flinch as the blonde stopped her hand on his forearm and smiled. She was so clearly flirting with him. I didn’t consider myself to be a jealous person. I firmly believe that in a healthy relationship with communication jealousy doesn’t have a place. True maybe I should be, since my last three official boyfriends all cheated on me. Of course they were assholes, and Spencer well he was Spencer, right? I decided to step closer before my brain convinced me to run to the nearest bridge and jump from it. 

The blonde stopped talking as she eyed me, getting the attention from the man in front of her.

“(y/n)”, Spencer smiled moving away slightly. “This is Ashley she is a writer for The Hill, Ashley this is (y/n), my girlfriend”, he said introducing us.

I was the first one to extend my hand, trying to smile as I felt the anger on my chest. She seemed surprised, quickly changing stances and shaking my hand.

“Nice to meet you”, she chirped. “I love your dress”, she pointed at my dress and that wasn’t bad, but her tone, her tone was the same tone those sorority girls used on me all the time. 

“Thank you, nice to meet you too”, I simply said nodding.

“Well, Spencie”, she said turning to see him. Spencie? “I hope I see you around”, she smiled and tilted her head. I narrowed my eyes sucking my lips in.

“You will probably see JJ more than me”, he joked waving as she walked away.

“So, you still want to look for that macaroon’s place?”, he finally faced me.

“Actually I think I’ll just head home, I’m tired”, I said pointing in the direction of my home.

“Ok sure…”, he looked confused, if not hurt. “Am I going home with you?”, he finally asked.

“I don’t know Spencer, you also have a shot with little miss ‘I will not stop blinking until you get in my bed’”, I bursted, it wasn’t fair. It was my awful week finally taking a toll. 

His eyes opened in surprise. “She is just a friend, not even that, she is someone I met at work a couple of times”, his voice was higher, which told me he was definitely nervous.

“Sure Spencer”, I nodded. “I’m going home”, I walked away, I didn’t want to fight and he didn’t deserve a fight.

“I don’t say anything when you flirt with people”, he said under his breath, but loud enough for me to hear.

“Who am I flirting with?”, I turned to face him.

“Mr Williams”, he crossed his arms.

“I do not flirt with him”, I said defensively.

“Well that is a clue you should probably throw at him someday”, he said looking right into my eyes. He looked angry now, his lips on a straight line. “Or throw it at literally any other man who you just let flirt to you.”, He added. That made my blood boil. How am I suppose to control if people flirt with me?

“I most definitely will, after you throw her a clue”, I said walking away. The thing is, my ankle still hurted, so as I tried to storm a sharp pain shot up my leg, making me limp a little.

As I stopped I felt his hands grab me softly by the arm. 

“Are you okay?”, he asked concerned looking down at my feet. I was wearing sneakers, they did not go with the outfit but my ankle was hurting in the morning as well.

“Yeah, I twisted my ankle yesterday”, I explained, I did not want to fight with him, I was just hurt. 

“Ok, lean on me, let’s go home”, He helped me get some of the weight off the foot on the way back home. It was a quiet walk, and I hated our real first date ended like this. Once the pain seemed to go away I started walking normally, he did not move his arm from around me though.

I unlocked the door walking in, not waiting for him to ask instead just leaving the door open for him to follow.

“(y/n)”, he stood in front of me as I untied my shoes.

“Look, I’m sorry okay?”, I said, still defensively though. 

When he kneeled in front of me I finally met his eyes, he looked hurt and I hated that I made that happen.

“You have literally no reason to feel jealous, or whatever you want to call it”, he said taking my hands on his.

“I just, I got anxious alright? She was flirting with you and I was scared you’d like it”, my voice was small.

His eyes showed so much sympathy I just wanted to look away, but he guided my face to his. 

“(y/n), I love you”, he said, the words cutting right through me like a hot knife through butter. My eyes flooded with tears. “I am so sorry I made you feel that way my sweet girl. I need you to know that I love you, and that as long as I am alive you do not have to feel jealous.”, he brought my hand to his chest, where his heart beating fast. “Because I am yours, in body and soul, completely yours. I am yours my sweet girl.”, He said, as tears fell from my eyes.

“I love you Spencer”, I echoed, meeting his lips desperately. “I love you”, I said again placing my hands on the back of his head. “I love you so much”, I sighed when his lips started traveling to my neck. 

“You’re mine”, he said, pushing me slowly into the couch.

“I’m yours”, I confirmed, letting his hands travel my body.

I sank further into the mattress, digging my nails on his back. He panted on top of me, thrusting as deep as it was humanly possible. I shook underneath him, feeling how his own release made him drop some of his weight on me.

“I love you”, he said as I played with his hair, it was longer than when I had met him, now going to his shoulders. I loved it, it was nice to run my fingers through.

“I love you too”, I felt his hands pulling me up, making me lay with my head on the pillows. I waited for him to lay next to me before I hugged him again.

“I know it isn’t your fault if people flirt with you”, he said, running his hand on my back. “It still makes me jealous though.” He confessed, his voice not as confident, instead the shy voice that he used with most other people. the doubtful Spencer. 

“I know, and it makes me jealous to see girls flirt with you too, but I’m yours Spencer” I whispered on his neck.

“My sweet girl, as long as you are next to me I know no fear. As long as I get to hold you I will not doubt you for a second. You are my family”, He said, my eyes filling with tears again.

“It’s not fair that you get all poet on me”, I chuckled, wiping the tears away. 

“hey”, he looked down at me. “Why are you crying?”

“Because I had an awful week and all I wanted is to be in your arms”, I confessed, burrowing my face in his side.

“We are here now, so stop the crying I need to see that beautiful smile.” I felt his hand travel down my side, to the place he knew would elicit a response.

“Don’t you dare”, I giggled feeling my skin creating goosebumps.

“I will resort to tickling if you don’t smile”, He said impishly.

I smiled up at him, my smile becoming genuine when I met his eyes.

“Yes, just like that”, he placed a delicate kiss on my lips. “Now let’s go to sleep.”

We shifted on the bed, Moving to our sides where I pressed my whole body on his. 

“You are the person I love most in the universe”, I whispered making him draw me closer.

This was the only place in the world I needed to be. He had one arm folded under my head and the other one around me, hand on the mattress. I took his hand and guided it to my lower stomach, feeling his breath catch for a second.

“And you are mine, until there is more of you to love. Then I’ll go back to school to see if I can somehow measure with mathematics the infinite love I’ll feel.” I smiled widely.

“So you don’t feel an infinite amount of love for me?”, I asked, playfully.

“Well actually…”

“Please don’t say some infinities are bigger than other infinities.” I giggled, following his train of thought.

“Why not?”, he asked confusedly.

“Because that would be from a book, the fault in our stars?”, I asked he shook his head, I chuckled.

“They are right though”, He said, his voice signaling he was about to explain math to me.

“I’m sure they are darling, now go to sleep”, I said closing my eyes. Feeling his fingers rub my skin carefully.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok so, initially at this point of the story I was going to add some angst. Something major happening to the couple, but then I decided not to. Every fic with Spencer has some angst lol. I just want this to be soft and cute. I apologize if anyone thinks that it's repetitive. Maybe in the future I will add something shocking, for now please enjoy soft Dr Reid.

Life is what happens when you are too busy making other plans right? In this case, life's what happened while I was too busy loving Spencer Reid. Because loving him was the easiest thing I’ve done. I had met him in the middle of February, I remember only because the air was crisp but filled with hope. Time has been a blur since, don’t ask me how the months rolled around and the end of May came to be, but here we were. The first official week of Summer Vacation. I wondered if the seasons knew that somewhere in a condominium of Washington DC a real life love story was unfolding. I let the man in front of me guide me, I was too tired to think anyway.

“Vegas here we come!”, Derek exclaimed loud enough to make everyone around him flinch, Five AM was way too early to be yelling at an airport.

“Remind me, what are you doing here?”, Spencer looked at him, a little disgust on his face as he gulped his coffee down.

“We finally got Strauss to agree to give us an extra week of vacation for our excellent job. Then you said we should go to Vegas”, Morgan said spinning Penelope around, who just giggled at his childish antics.

I smiled, I knew the team had about a month of just awful cases, cases that made Spencer come back home tire. With intense headaches, even then on the bad days I just laid by his side trying to soothe the pain away. They had an extra week of paid vacation more than earned.

“Actually, what happened is that I said I will go to Vegas and visit my mom with (y/n), since the school year had ended. Then you said that it was a great idea, I did not know you invited yourself until later that day when you started asking what flight we should take.”, Spencer said, putting his arm around me and pulling me closer, as the whole group walked to the gates.

“That is hurtful talk Reid, you didn’t say anything when Rossi invited himself too”, Derek pointed at Rossi, who was walking in front his eyes on his phone.

“I am not going with you people, I am going to visit my female friend”, He said without slowing down.

“We don’t need you to have fun old man”, he called putting his arms around Emily and Garcia, one woman under each arm.

“Actually, I am invited to the female friend’s party too”, Emily said, pulling herself and catching up to Rossi.

“Not fair”, Derek said, “You and me baby girl, till the end?”, he asked Garcia now.

“Of course mon ami”, She replied.

“All of you will meet us at the resort right?”, Hotch asked, His hand guiding Jack through the almost empty hallway. He, JJ, and Will had decided to take the kids to disneyland. The group had agreed to meet them at the end of the week for a day in the happiest place on earth. I was more than happy when I heard the plan, Spencer being far less thrilled. Something about bacteria, and crowded places, and overpriced food. All complains ceased when I told him what we would do in the hotel after a long day. 

Rossi seemed to be about to say something when Emily cut him off. “We will”, she smiled.

“I don’t see why any of you want me there, you know I’m not”, he eyed Jack who was busy looking around, and Henry sleeping on William’s arms. “Fond of kids”, he finished his thoughts.

“Because We will definitely buy you glitter Mickey ears and make you ride the teacups.”, Garcia stated excitedly.

“And because the resort we will be staying in has all amenities, so at noon when you have had enough you can head back for a spa day”, JJ said. That seemed to have a positive reaction on the man.

“C’mon Dave is not going to be as bad as you think”, Hotch said smiling. 

“Somehow I doubt that”, Rossi said, still he said goodbye with a smile as he approached the first class lounge.

“We will see you guys Thursday”, Hotch said, signaling for Jack to say goodbye. The kid drowsily did.

“Take care, don’t party too much”, JJ started hugging everyone one by one, when he go to Spencer she smiled brightly, “Say hi to your mom from me”.

“I will”, He smiled, “Bye”, he whispered to Henry, kissing his hair. My heart soared at the sight. I perched to his side not wanting him to move an inch away from me.

“Someone is clingy”, he said when we were sitting in the plane, as soon as the seatbelt sign turned off I hugged him, putting my head on his chest and moving the armrest away.

“Have any complains Dr Reid?”, I asked softly.

“Not at all”, He rubbed my back, my eyelids heavy.

I woke up not even two hours later to the recognizable feeling of my stomach turning, an acid feel traveling up my throat. I moved away quickly bending over as I breathe heavily.

“Hey”, Spencer placed his book on the small table in front. “Are you okay?”, He rubbed my hair.

I simply nodded, trying to concentrate on not letting my body throw up. He must’ve called the stewardess because she approached us with her cart, looking at me before asking in the most kind and friendly manner.

“Are you okay sweetheart? Do you need anything?”

“No, some water maybe?”, I said squinting my eyes while looking up.

“Sure thing”, she started serving on the small plastic cup.

“Do you want more coffee?”, She asked Spencer who simply nodded as she refilled his mug. Handing him an outrageous amount of sugar packets and creamers.

“Do you want some coffee?”, she asked me now, colors coming back to my face.

“No, can I actually have some herbal tea?”, I asked sheepishly.

“Of course”, she started preparing my drink as Spencer pulled me closer to him.

“Motion sickness?”, He asked kissing the top of my head.

“Yeah”, I said accepting the drink. The rest of the trip had been a lot easier on me, I fell asleep quickly on his arms once again. He checked on me every now and then to make sure I was doing fine. I was, in fact I was doing more than fine, I was doing amazing.

“(y/n)”, Spencer said entering the room, “What are you doing”, he asked amusedly.

I was standing in front of the bed, my outfit choices spread in front of me. I felt awful knowing I was taking time away from him and his mom.

“I think you should go alone”, I said crossing my arms.

“Why?”, he asked confusedly getting closer to me.

“Because I don’t know what to wear”, I admitted sounding defeated, he chuckled as he pulled me into a hug, as soon as he saw my serious expression he sucked his lips in. “I’m serious, what happens if I don’t look good? and she decides I am not enough for her boy? What if she thinks I’m dumb or something?”, I asked, feeling the insecurity on my throat.

“Hey, I already told you. I’ve talked about you, she loves you”, He rubbed my cheek with his fingers.

“Yeah, but I want her to know that I love you and that I’m capable of being with you”, I said looking into his eyes, which softened at my words.

“My sweet girl”, he said with such admiration I swore I was going to burst out crying. “I know that, and that should be enough.”

“If your mom hates me it’s your fault”, I whined as I picked a dress from the bed, walking into the bathroom and getting changed.

I knew how much his mom meant to him. I knew most of his stories and they tore me to pieces. I needed Diana Reid to like me, I needed to somehow let her know I loved her son so much, and that I would not hurt him ever. I wanted to tell her that as long as I had control I would give Spencer a life that made him forget about the past. There was this thing deep inside me that needed to connect with her. The bald man had guided us through the hallways, the place was much more nicer than most institutions. I took a deep breath when he knocked the door, opening it immediately.

“Hey Diana, look who made it finally”, the doctor announced. In the other end of the room a blonde woman with short hair was reading on a chair.

“Spencer”, a smile grew on her face as he let my hand go to hug his mom. He held her for a while before letting go.

“Hi mom”, he said softly, kissing her cheek, “How you’ve been?”, he asked scanning her face.

“You know, nobody here likes to have fun”, she joked, making Spencer laugh softly.

“Now, now, He is going to actually believe it”, the doctor said in a friendly manner. “Well Doctor Reid I’ll leave you to it, I will be stopping by in a while so we can talk?”, He asked, gathering an empty tray that sat on a table. Spencer nodded as the doctor walked out.

“Mom, this is (y/n), remember that I told you about her”, Spencer extended his hand towards me to walk closer.

“It’s very nice to meet you ma’am”, I said politely while giving her a small wave of my hand.

“Oh you are even prettier than what he described”, she said pulling me into a hug. “Please call me Diana or Diane sweetie”, she said I nodded as she pulled away.

“You are too, prettier than what he described”, I said. She signaled for me to sit in the chair across hers and I did, flattening the skirt of my soft green dress.

She took a seat on the chair, Spencer taking her hand and sitting on the arm rest.

“So, how was the flight?”, she finally asked, looking up at her son. Right there they looked so similar, their factions were a carbon copy of each other.

“It was fine mom, how have you been feeling lately?”, he asked, again in his soft voice.

“I’m always fine son, you should not worry about me too much.”, She rolled her eyes dramatically, yeah that is something that Spencer would do. “I will say that I like to see you’ve been eating healthy”, she patted his stomach, making him purse his lips. “I’m going to assume she has been feeding you?”, she smiled my way.

“I try as best as I can”, I snickered.

“Good, he better be doing exactly as you say”, she winked my way.

I blushed a little, “Most of the time”, I joked, seeing his jaw drop slightly.

“I’m not surprised”, she shook her head in a playful manner. “You write me any time he misbehaves and I’ll make sure to put him in his place”

“How did this ended up here?”, he asked rubbing his mom shoulder.

“We just did”, she rubbed his knee. “Had any flare ups recently?”, she asked, he shook his head slightly. My shoulders tensed. I knew about how he was shot, actually I knew about many things, things I did not want to know. Things that made it all a miracle that Spencer was even sitting here in front of me.

“Spencer I think you should talk to the doctor, I’m sure he has lots to tell you”, She said now looking my way.

Spencer looked between the two of us, before understanding and standing up.

“Sure, don’t scare her too much”, he was clearly joking but I took a fistful of my dress in nervousness.

“I’m not joking, if you need to put him in his place”, she said, when he walked away.

“No”, I chuckled. “Your son is the perfect gentleman”, I saw her, that seemed to please her.

“Sometimes he gets too in his head, does he talk about work?”, She asked. I thought Spencer was able to look right through me, but his mom was even better. He could have gotten it from her. Or maybe I was too easy to read.

“Yeah, I try to keep him with me”, I spoke before drawing my eyes away from her.

“Then what is it?”, she asked, leaning towards me and grabbing my hands softly. I looked up at her, her maternal eyes scanning me.

“I’m, scared…”, I started, she tensed. “He is fine I promise I’m just, I don’t want to ever lose him, I cannot afford to.”, I said, the words leaving my mouth before being registered by my brain.

She nodded her head, “I have been worried about my baby for thirty years, always wondering what day he would write me and it wouldn’t be him. Spencer is a brilliant man, a very complex one, I’ve been worried since the moment he was born about the day life took a piece of him that was integral to who he is”, She said. I felt the tingling sensation on my nose, the one telling me tears were coming. She actually put into words my worst fears.

“I don’t know if I’m enough”, I confessed, and I shouldn’t have. But she in a very motherly manner pull me to the front of her, my knees on the floor as she hugged me.

“I have been worried about him for thirty years, and a couple of months back you know what happened?”, I shook my head, her embrace was so similar to the one I’ve come to know. “He wrote about you”.

I knew about the letters, I had seen him writing page after page, it didn’t matter if he talked to her on the phone. He tried to tell her everything he could through his writing.

“He wrote about you, and for the first time in three decades I could breath, knowing that my baby was safe.”, She said, I separated a little, trying to avoid the tears to hit her shirt. “Whatever you did, whatever you are doing, you have given me the Spencer I love the most. The one with a purpose, for that I will eternally be grateful to you.”, She smiled rubbing my shoulder.

“I love him so much”, I said, she softened a lot more. 

“I know you do”, She eyed my body as I stood up to sit back down. “He’s going to be so happy…”, she smiled so brightly, not unlike Spencer.

I furrowed my eyebrows slightly. “How did you….”

“Hey”, Spencer said walking in, “Am I interrupting?”, he asked with some guilt on his tone.

“Not at all, me and (y/n) were just baskin in each other’s company”, she said smiling my way. Spencer looked apprehensive. “Don’t worry I haven’t shown her your baby pictures yet”, she said devilishly. 

Spencer relaxed sitting next to me.

“I don’t think she wants to”, he said taking my hand.

“I do, I’ve never want anything in life more than to see your baby butt”, I chuckled. He groaned throwing his head back a little as I bit my tongue.

Diana was sitting in between the two of us, She had an old leather back photo album on her lap.

“This is his first day of college”, She pointed at a picture. Young Spencer looking almost annoyed at his picture being taken, he had some books under his arm and was wearing a Caltech sweater.

“Oh my God Spencer you were adorable”, I cooed looking at the picture.

He grimaced lightly.

A knock came from the door. “Dr Reid I just wanted to know if you were sleeping here tonight?”, The doctor asked. 

We had talked about it, Spencer would spend the night here and I would head back to the hotel. I told him that it was okay although he seemed to only accept the idea.

“Actually they both are”, Diana spoke quickly, taking us both by surprise.

“That’s okay, I’ll make sure that someone brings up blankets.”, The doctor nodded walking away.

I was about to protest.

“You two are sleeping here and that is final”, she said, authoritative.

“Yes ma’am”, the two of you said in unison, as the woman was now flipping more pages.

Every picture, every little detail about his childhood made my heart shrink. I wish I could go back in time and tell young Spencer that he was going to be okay, that somehow somewhere along the line he and I would find each other. I felt his hand rub my arm on the back of the couch.


	10. Chapter 10

I put my phone back on my purse as I accepted the two drinks from the bartender. I flashed him a smile and struded around the room. The sin capital of the world right? I snaked around yet another couple dry humping on the room. I felt confident, and I wanted to embrace that. I had pulled an old dress of mine, a black leather dress that was tight on my body, now more than before. It still was not too tight, giving me some mobility. The only thing separating my naked body to the world was a golden zipper cutting right in the middle of my front.

“Love the tan”, I said handing Emily a drink, she smiled accepting it. 

“You look bomb”, she pointed out drinking. I smiled, I did. I walked towards the man everyone was gravitating around. 

I stood on his sides, running my fingers in his shoulders and handing him the glass. He looked concentrated on the screen in front of him.

“One more and you take it home”, Morgan said excitedly, with the girl he had chosen right on his side.

I drew his face to mine, he smiled, a dark smile.

“For the good luck”, I said kissing his lips, a passionate kiss that belonged in the bedroom and not a casino on the lobby of our hotel. He bit my bottom lip as he pulled away. It was a miracle he didn’t say that these games weren’t about luck but rather algorithms. 

He moved his fingers around the screen one more time. Bright lights and obnoxiously loud noises letting him know he had just taken five thousand dollars home. He stood up quickly pulling me to an even more passionate kiss. I heard the people celebrating and whistling on our direction. 

“Dude”, Morgan shook him a little, handing him the slip of paper. Still Spencer looked at me, I knew that meant our fun night was far from over.

“Ugh”, I groaned, throwing my purse on a table, I was about to bend over the bed to untie my heels.

“Don’t you dare”, Spencer said standing really close to me, I could feel the heat radiating from his body. “This number you pulled”, he ran a finger through the zipper of my dress.

“Did you like it Doctor?”, I asked playfully. “It’s all for you”

“Tell me, is it the first time you use this dress?”, he asked, his breathing hitting my neck.

“what do you think?”

“I would like to think you bought it for me, because you knew what it would do, that is why you asked me to wait in the lobby. I would like to think you knew what the dress would do to me”, I chuckled. “Are you having fun?”, He purred on my ear.

“The most fun a girl can have”, I smiled, I felt his knee separating my legs slowly.

“You stay right there you understand? You will not move an inch, if you do I will not fuck you”, He said, pulling himself away from me. I breathed, weighing my options.

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep”, I said, when he came back he was wearing nothing, I could feel him freely in my barely covered body.

“Yet you didn’t move, that is why I don’t believe your rebel phase story, too sweet yet not rotten”, He unzipped my dress, letting the piece of clothing fall to the ground. He guided my arms behind me, where I felt the cold heavy material being placed around my wrists, it wasn’t till I heard the clicking sound that I understood.

“Brought some equipment with you?”, I joked, He bended my body over the mattress. “Where the tax paying dollars ended”, I continued.

“You are chatty today aren’t you? Any other day I would find a way to make you shut up, but tonight. I want the whole city to hear you scream.”

Sloppy kisses on my back as he started his journey to my butt. His teeth grazing my skin and pulling my panties down by biting them. I yelped at the sensation. The only response I got was his tongue traveling from my ankle to my inner thigh.

“Always so wet for me”, he groaned before shoving his head between my legs. 

“Spencer”, I yelled, immediately followed by the separation of his face and my core. “Dr Reid”, I corrected my hips pushing against his breathing. “Please Doctor Reid”, I said again.

“Since you asked nicely”, he said putting his head back where it was. I could feel his persistent tongue against me, taking, slightly biting. Like a dog who has found a bone I thought. My legs weak as he harshly dug his fingers on my buttcheeks. The sounds coming from me could only be perceived as growls. Just when the wave was building inside me he stood up.

“Please Doctor Reid, I’m so close”, I cried.

“Why should I give it to you?”, he laughed with a hint of anger in his voice. 

“Please Doctor Reid.”, I repeated my words on a beg.

“Why should I fuck you? You come out looking like that, and kiss me in front of everyone, knowing what you were doing, torturing me”, He said, I felt the mattress shift at his weight.

“Doctor Reid I need you, I’m sorry. Please fuck me”, I said, every combination that popped into my head.

“Did you enjoy all the eyes on you? My sweet girl”, he said kissing my neck, his sucks becoming harsher at his words.

“Only yours”, I replied.

“Only mine”, He entered me at once, Eliciting a scream from my chest.

“Let them hear you, Let them know how much you want this”, He placed his hand in my throat, hard enough to make my head dizzy but not to disrupt my airway completely.

“Please”, I said, his rhythm only increased. My hands yanking on the metal when I felt him in the deepest part of me.

“My sweet girl”, he moaned, making my body shiver. He yanked the handcuffs making my back arch as he finished, taking a couple of pumps before my body fell on the mattress. I was nothing but a death weight at that point. I still was careful to avoid him falling on top of me, just shifting slightly so that his weight laid beside me.

I had taken a calculated risk, but boy was I bad at math. I don’t know how Spencer pulled it off but by the next day I could barely walk. Which was not good. In the morning we had visited his mom, who just eyed me weirdly as I wore a longer skirt and a long sleeved turtle neck. I initially didn’t want to go, but she was persistent and I wanted to make sure she and I got along. Which we did, I mean she even laughed when Spencer gave her a hug and she noticed a hickey, well not a hickey, a nasty bruise on his neck. I had blushed so much before she told us to go and have fun. Which for me it was going to the hotel room and laying there. For Derek was inviting us to the pool, I tried every play on the book but he didn’t accept no for an answer.

I swear I could almost see the pride in Spencer as I took my beach dress off showing some of last night’s evidence. I had worn a one piece, still it didn’t take an FBI agent to know the marks on my butt looked exactly like a handprint. Thankfully nobody said anything, just giving us conspiratory looks. There was something hot about everyone knowing that I was his. 

Before I knew it we were in Disneyland, which again, I didn’t know what to do. I had to tell the team I was scared by sudden movement, which prompted a couple of stares between them. I had decided to be the person assigned to look over the bags as everyone rode the attractions. Spencer stayed by my side the whole time, his issue being the bacteria. I empathize with the employee who he had approached with questions about the cleaning routine. When she didn’t know the answers to. He gave her an entire chemistry lesson on how they could clean to prevent the spread of diseases. She looked lost as I pried him away. Still he was happy to be around the kids, so much rambling for nothing.

“Congratulations”, I leaned over the man on the other side of the bench.

“Are you sure you had nothing to do with it?”, He asked, a smile on his face as he saw the image in front of us. Henry and Jack running around as Spencer and JJ followed them. The giggles flooding our ears. 

The rest of the team had gone to the restrooms and to grab something to drink. Except Rossi, who stayed for the total of two hours before sneaking away back to the resort. 

“I promise”, I smiled at him, “The principal had already accepted him when I knocked on his door”, I saw as Spencer pulled Henry off the ground, placing him on his shoulders.

“You know”, He saw as Morgan snuck from behind now pulling Jack to his shoulders. “Jack was always so quick to pick things up, he walked faster than other kids, did things faster. I was scared he was too eager to grow up, these are the moments that I see him as the kid that he is, just doing kid stuff”, His smile was genuine. 

“Tell me why the line for the restroom is longer than the line for Splash Mountain?”, Penelope said coming back, I laughed.

Henry demanded be put on the ground as he saw his dad coming back with a drink on his hands. Spencer met my eyes from where he was and walked towards me.

“Hey”, I said, licking the ice cream cone on my hand. 

“Hey”, he said, his breathing a little heavy, he leaned to lick the ice cream before I tilted it enough to leave some on his nose. A childish giggle exploding from my chest now.

“I hate to say this but Reid is right, overpriced everything”, Emily said with several bags on her hands.

There were few more magical things than to stand below the fireworks after a long day, kissing Spencer Reid. It was a religious experience, to feel his lips on mine as our hearts beat as loud as the explosions. Now granted, the reasons why my heart was beating fast was due to the nervousness of what would happen next.

When we got to the hotel I took first dibs on the shower, I was on the bed, zapping through the channels on TV, nothing too interesting. I stopped it at some house renovation show, not being able to concentrate.

“I know you were very detailed about what you wanted to do after this day, and believe me I want to. But I’m too tired, so if you want to do anything to me just do it”, he flopped belly up on the bed, his eyes close.

I chuckled as I climbed on top of him. “I didn’t know you could get tired”, I smiled when his hands landed on my hips.

I took both of them and placed them in front of me, I kissed them. “If you are tired now I cannot imagine in a couple of years when we come back”, I said waiting for a reaction. When he finally opened one of his eyes I pulled one of his hands to my lower stomach. “Your son will be just a toddler and we’ll have to chase him around”, I finally said.

The reaction was almost too comical. He opened his eyes as he propped himself up to sit down, his hand still on my stomach as I sat on his lap.

“What?”, he asked, confusion on his face. 

“To be a genius you are clueless sometimes”, I rolled my eyes dramatically.

“(y/n) are you…?” I nodded my head, “Are we?”, I nodded my head as tears flooded my eyes.

“Oh God”, he pulled me for a hug, a very tight one. “How long have you known?”

“Almost two weeks now, I wanted to tell you sooner. Then I decided to let you have one last vacation before I lock you down”, I giggled, feeling his hand on my belly.

“(y/n) we are having a baby”, he cried now, fully, I pulled him closer to me. Feeling my body shake as the tears didn’t cease. “Thank you so much”, he said kissing my face. 

“I love you”, I said kissing his lips. He delicately placed me on the bed. I smiled as he hovered on top of me, but his eyes didn’t meet mine, instead looking at my body.

“I love you”, he replied finally looking at my eyes. “How far along are we”, He lowered himself to place kisses on my belly.

“About seven to eight weeks, according to my calculations, I haven’t gotten an ultrasound yet. I wanted you to be there”, he nodded his head.

“I love you”, he said again, but this time he wasn’t talking to me, I brushed his hair with my hand. “I love you so much little one”, he said, and I started crying again, a good cry.

“There is just something I don’t understand”, He said coming back again to my eyeline, He wiped the tears away. “You said son, and I believe you meant daughter”, his smile was brighter than I have ever seen before.

“No Doctor, he is inside me, I would know. I am carrying little Spencer Reid Jr.”, I rubbed my stomach now.

“I don’t think you get to decide that?”, he said chuckling.

“And you do?” I asked teasingly.

“As a matter of fact yes, I’m a doctor you have to trust me”, he said making me laugh. 

“Little Mr Spencer”, I said again.

“I don’t care”, he said now kissing me. “I don’t care about what it is I’ll love them no matter what”, He placed kisses all over my face now. “Because they’ll be a little piece of me and you.”

“Poor kid doesn’t stand a chance”, I smiled.

“No…. Wait”, he said realizing something. “You were in Vegas, how you? did you?”

“i didn’t drink I promise, my ‘rum and cokes’ were all coke no rum”, I said knowing where his train of thought was.

“But people were smoking on the street, and the air pollution, and the vibrations at the theme park. I read somewhere about loud sounds. Wait no, that was in the later stages” I pulled him to me when I knew his mind was leaving. I had made Mr eidetic memory forget, to me that was an accomplishment.

“Spencer, Spencer”, I said grabbing his face calling him back to me. “We are good, I stayed safe I promise. We are safe”, He hugged me again, being careful not to place any weight on my abdomen.

“My sweet little girls”, He kissed my forehead, and this time I did not argue. I just smiled at the feeling of his skin on mine. 

“Does anyone know?”, he asked, getting comfortable behind me, as I spooned closer to him. This little life inside me craving their dad’s touch. He started drawing intricate patterns on my skin. 

“No, well your mom”, I said he faced me confusedly. “I don’t know how but she knew the moment she saw me, that is why she said she expected us back in a couple of months.”

“Thank you”, he said softly.

“What for Dr Reid, I have done several good things”, I joked.

“Everything, for being you.” He placed a small kiss on my nose as he plopped back on the bed.

“You can thank me by changing diapers”, I joked, but deep down I knew Spencer Reid was about to be the best dad ever.


	11. Chapter 11

“You are making me look like that one time that I ate a whole pizza by myself”, I patted my belly. Seeing my reflection in the mirror, now that the scary first trimester was over I had nothing but love in my heart. Love for this life growing inside me, for this little Spencer who was occupying my body. I wasn’t showing yet, but you could tell I was bloated, well not bloated pregnant. I made a beeline for the kitchen, humming along to a song playing in the background, I checked and stirred dinner as I grabbed what was left of the laundry basket. I did my best to pick as many books on my way back to the bedroom. Because of course Spencer had bought a hundred books on pregnancy. 

“Daddy really went ballistic uh?”, I said putting some of my clothes in the cabinets. “That is only because he loves you little peanut.” I said smiling. Yeah I did know that he couldn’t hear me yet, and Spencer knew too. That still did not stop us at all from speaking to him. 

“Ugh”, I groaned opening the cabinet. “Daddy is so messy”, I said, dumping the contents of the basket without even trying to fix the mess. It did not matter how many times I fixed his sock drawer, he somehow ended with a pink and a purple sock on each foot. “I hope that is not a genetic trait”, I chuckled at my own ideas.

“It is not, at least it hasn’t been proven. Messiness, as well as some traits are environmental factors, technically learned”, The man said behind me, I jumped up.

“You scared me”, I chastised while pouting.

“I am so sorry”, he laughed with no sign of regret in his voice. He sounded amused almost as he walked towards me pulling me in for a hug. “I didn’t mean to interrupt a conversation between my two favorite girls”, He smiled.

“You are not, you are interrupting a conversation between the love of your life and your son”, He wanted to argue but I didn’t let him, instead pulling him closer for a kiss. 

Spencer was laying on the couch with his head on my lap as I played with his hair. Goofy was laying on my feet. He had become very territorial of me, Spencer actually liked that. I actually believe that the dog knew about the baby before me. My finger just changing the channels on the tv, I liked the domesticity of the situation.

“I told Hotch”, Spencer said, I knew he wanted to tell me something after dinner, which is why I had told him to lay down. I was very good and taking his defenses down, even when he didn’t notice.

“You did”, I muted the TV, knowing there was a story coming.

“Yeah I had to, I told him that I might want to take a job at HQ”, He said, his voice low. I looked down at him as he laid belly up for me to see his face.

“A job at HQ?”, I asked, trying to calculate my next move.

“Well not completely, just, assisting on the cases from the office, and only going on the field when necessary.”, His eyebrows furrowed making his forehead create wrinkles, I smoothed them out with my hand delicately. I wanted to ask him why, but I was scared of the answer. I really wanted Spencer to be happy, and I knew how happy his job made him. Which is why I had decided to not say anything about it before. He saved my suffering by answering my unasked questions. “I know you worry when I’m in the field.”, he said trying to give me a sympathetic smile.

Ok, now I felt like crap. “I do, I will always worry about you Spencer. I want you to be happy though, and I don’t like thinking that I’m keeping you from your job, from doing what you love.” There it was, that feeling of pure guilt. The one that had popped into my head when I sat on the floor with the positive pregnancy test. Where we moving too quickly? Were we actually ready to take the next step. It didn’t matter now, there was a life growing inside me and we were both head over heels for it.

“(y/n),” He took my hand delicately. “You are not. I know you worry about me, and I was thinking, I don’t want our little peanut worrying about it either.” Our little peanut, that had been the only thing we had agreed to call him, they, until we found out the sex. “I think you and I know very well what is like to live without dads, I don’t want her to feel that way. I want to be there for her, I want her to know that her dad is there, always.”, He gave me a weak smile.

“She will, because you are not like them. You are going to be a great dad Spencer”, I drew circles on his lips as he was about to pout. “So what did Hotch say?”, I finally asked.

“Well, he said that he was happy. He agrees that it’s for the best, I don’t partake in many takedowns anyway, so unless necessary I will be kept from the field. I will still be there with them, just not in the same location.”, He explained, pursing his lips. He was scared a knew that.

“Penelope is going to murder you after a week of you staying with her”, I chuckled, really trying to lift the tension.

“She will be so happy”, he smiled now. “I’m her favorite”

“Uh-hu”, I said mimicking his smile. “I love you Spencer Reid”, I told him. Maybe by saying those words I would let him know that I was with him in every step of the way, it didn’t matter what his decision was.

“I love you too”, He squeezed my hand lightly.

“By the way, you keep saying her when our son is right here”, I chuckled at the way he just looked at me challenging.

He shifted now, facing my belly. I helped him fold my shirt up exposing the small bump.

He pressed his lips to my skin, humming a little making me giggle at the sensation that his vibrating lips sent up my body. It was his little experiment, he would do that to see if when the baby is born they could recognize the action. For the moment it just made my heart grow.

“Mommy is a little insecure right now. She thinks I want to stop working because of her. When in reality, once I meet you I will not be able to let you go little one.”, I smiled, I knew better than to interrupt the conversation. “She also thinks you are a boy, so in a couple of months you need to stay still and let her know you are my little girl”, He smiled now, lowering his voice, as in whispering a secret. “I actually don’t care what you are, I’m going to love you so much my little peanut, you will come to this world with a dad who already would do anything for you”. Tears threatened to come out of my eyes as I saw him. He looked so appeased. 

“Has she been giving you a hard time?”, He asked looking at me now, I shook my head.

“Just in the mornings really, Oh and we found out the bad way we don’t like bananas apparently.”, I said twisting my lips when I remembered how my stomach completely rejected my morning snack.

“So tuna and bananas so far?”, He asked, I nodded my head.

“You need to stop upsetting mommy’s stomach, she needs to eat to keep you healthy in there”, He went back to whispering. I played with his hair. as he went on a ramble about his day. “Then Uncle Morgan slipped his paperwork on my desk, but daddy is very smart and I knew it wasn’t mine as soon as I saw the cheeto prints on the file.”, He said making me chuckled slightly.

“I think the three of us need to go to bed, tomorrow is a very important day”, I said, when I noticed his eyelids beginning to close.

“Okay dad you can sit over there”, Doctor Arya said pointing at a chair next to the bed I was laying in. We had loved Doctor Arya since the beginning, she was warm and personal. She had answered every single one of Spencer’s questions and soothed out every one of my concerns. We just hadn’t had time for an actual ultrasound. With Spencer’s work all I could do was go visit the doctor to make sure everything was fine. I had one other ultrasound but had chosen not to see anything. I wanted the first look at my baby to be something He and I kept forever.

“The gel is really cold alright, so just relax”, she said squeezing some of the transparent gel on my belly, before she started moving the wand. “Ok”, she said moving it to an specific location. “There is your baby”, she smiled. 

“Spencer”, I whispered squeezing his hand.

“That is our baby?”, he asked, looking in awe at the image.

“Yep, and we are, fourteen weeks right? we should be more than fine to do this”, she pressed something in the keyboard.

A rhythmic beating filled the room, My eyes watered. Spencer brought a hand to his mouth as he softened.

“Your baby is perfect”, she smiled. “I see nothing to concern me, according to everything you are now officially into your second trimester”, She said writing some stuff down as she took the wand away from me.

“Ok mom and dad, I will go put this on the system. For right now I will leave you with the video, I’ll come back with some pictures and a CD alright?”, She asked, handing me a towel to clean up and walking out.

“Our baby”, I sobbed.

“She is perfect”, He smiled rubbing his hand on my now clean tummy. 

“I love you so much Spencer”, I said when his lips met mine.

“I love you too so much, both of you.”

Have you had the feeling of pure happiness? that is what the car ride to Quantico was, just us talking about everything. From names, to nursery colors, to activities we should do while the baby was on the womb. We held hand the whole way up, when the elevator doors opened I saw around. 

So this is where he works?, I saw a cluster of desks where I could see Emily and Derek laughing, Their eyes met mine.

“Hey! I thought you took the day off”, Derek said standing up. “Hi beautiful”

“Hi Derek”, I said smiling.

“What’s going on? Missing work already?”, Emily came to hug me.

“Actually we have something that we want to tell you guys, meeting room?”, Spencer said getting confused nods from the team. It took a couple of minutes for everyone to enter the room.

“So, as you guys know you are the closest thing to a family I have, and I know (y/n) loves you all very much.”, He said flashing me a smile. “So it was only fair to let you guys know first”, he stuck his hand on his satchel as he fumbled to retrieve the pictures. “Let you see for the very first time, the newest member of the BAU”, He placed the pictures on the table.

What followed was chaos, Penelope was the first to hug me.

“Oh my God! that is why you look even more radiant than ever, oh my I’m going to be an auntie again”, she smiled widely.

“Spence!”, JJ said hugging Spencer tightly.

“I thought you were leaving us you asshole”, Emily punched Reid on the arm before hugging him.

“Kid! congratulations!”, Derek said to Reid before hugging me. “I’m really happy for the both of you”, he said.

“Congratulations”, Rossi said looking at me softly. “I’m sure the little one will be loved.”

“She will”, Reid said smiling as he hugged me to his side.

“You know Gender already?” Hotch asked inspecting the pictures with smile on his face.

“No, this one just seems to be sure that it’s a girl”, I rolled my eyes with a big smile.

“Well she better be, I need a little girl to spoil.” Penelope said, as she and JJ rubbed my tummy.

“No wait”, derek said approaching me. “I need you to have a baby boy, look, if it’s a girl she can be part of the team but if it’s a boy we can go semi pros.”

“What”, I said confusedly.

“He has this mini league of baseball”, Emily rolled her eyes as she added your hand to the other hands caressing your tummy.

“There’s going to be two of him walking around”, Rossi said looking at Reid as the group laughed.

“Hey JJ, we kinda want to tell Henry ourselves, as well as Jack”, Spencer said looking at her and Hotch.

“Sure thing, just let us know when”, Hotch smiled patting my shoulder as he muttered another congrats.

“Do you guys know what these are?”, The kids shook their head as they worked on their chicken fingers. Spencer smiled “They are images.”

“They look weird”, Henry said first picking one up and inspecting it confusedly. 

“Well they are of the inside of (y/n) belly”, He said.

“Why are they taking pictures of her stomach?”, Jack said leaning on the table to see the other pictures.

“Her belly, not her stomach”, Spencer laughed softly.

“Well boys, they take pictures of my belly so we can see the baby.”, I said, smiling.

“The baby?”, Henry said confused again.

“Yes, in a couple of months, you boys will have a new cousin.”, I explained, the immediate response was jaws dropping, then a high five between then as they celebrated.

“A boy cousin?”, Jack asked smiling.

“We don’t know yet, we have to wait”, Spencer said.

“And the baby is in your belly?”, Henry asked, I nodded.

What followed was a lesson on pregnancy by Doctor Reid, the kids losing interest quickly, more concerned over what they were going to play when the baby came.

“Maybe I can go get some pork chops for dinner”, Spencer said rummaging the fridge.

hmmm pork chops, glazed with some…. I felt the bile up my throat as I ran to the restroom. Spencer quickly following and holding my hair back.

Once I was done he hugged me into his lap.

“Pork?”, he asked amusedly.

“Yeah…”, I breathed out. “You better talk some sense in your daughter Spencer Reid, I cannot go around puking just at the mention of something she doesn’t like.”

“Daughter?”, He asked softly, a big smile on his face.

“No oh fuck, I meant Son”, I corrected myself, but the damage was done. Spencer had the smile of someone who just won the lottery.


	12. Chapter 12

Spencer reached his hand to grab mine, I jumped at the sensation. I could hear him chuckle and the only thing I wanted was to see that beautiful smile of his.

“Did you really need to use the same blindfold?”, I asked, intertwining our fingers.

“I can’t help it, you just look way too cute on it”, He said.

Let me tell you where I was pregnancy wise. I was HORNY, I was beyond that, I was feral. At nineteen weeks, I couldn’t stand the touch of anyone because I wanted to immediately get in bed with them. And that was a problem, Spencer had gone on a case a week ago, a case involving children. He didn’t give me much details but I knew that now those cases were a lot different than before. He had been home for three days, all I did was stay at his side as he slowly drifted back in routine. Routine that did not include us having sex, because he was terrified, even when science proved him wrong. I swear he thought he would break me, the fact that once he threw me in the bed just to immediately remember I was pregnant did not help. It wasn’t until yesterday that I finally found what I was yearning for.

_ “I love you”, I say running my hands through his hair, he smiled on my lips. _

_ “I love you” he echoed, then I made my move, biting his bottom lip and pulling it a little. He dug his fingers on my head before letting me go completely. “Do you mind if I take a quick shower before dinner?”, He asked, giving me a chaste kiss. _

_ “No”, I took a step back. “It’s not like I didn’t have two plates already”, I tried to smile while scratching the back of my head. _

_ If he noticed my demeanor he ignored it as he walked into the bedroom. Well that stung, did he not think I was sexy anymore? Did he not like me? I tried to hold tears back. I ran my hands through my now much bigger tummy. I smiled weakly, damn hormones. _

_ I took a deep breath before putting the salad on the fridge, if he wanted to eat he could serve himself. Fuck Spencer Reid. Again, blame the hormones. I walked to the bedroom, noticing the bathroom door slightly ajar. Which was weird, Spencer liked to take hot showers and he was worried of the steam, something about the mold and the particles of water building up. I realized neither the vent or the shower were turned on yet. I walked slowly about to close the door when I heard that melodical sound my body immediately recognized. He was moaning, I stuck my head through the door very carefully. _

_ The sight almost made me faint right there and then. He was leaning against the counter, his head was pushed back. I swallowed noticing his face muscles tense, his mouth a little bit open. His clothes were still on, his pants just pushed a little bit down, which let me know he had been in a hurry. He had his erection out, his hand pumping methodically. My heart raced just at the image, yet he was doing that, instead of well, me. I was about to close the door and cry myself to sleep when I heard the most beautiful sound. _

_ My name, as a moan, coming from his lips. I scanned his face, his eyes closed forcefully, he looked to be in deep thought. He was imagining… me. I smiled, pushing all thoughts aside and acted quick. I stripped down of my clothes as quick as I could, and snuck into the bathroom. He had to be as horny as me since he didn’t hear me. When I finally placed my hand on his he yelped. _

_   
_ _ “(y/n)...”, He said flustered. I didn’t respond, instead just tightening my grip. “I… I can’t”, I was not used to him using this voice in these types of situation. _

_ “Why?”, I asked, there was no stopping me now. He took my hand away as he placed his on my cheeks. _

_ “I don’t… I don’t want to hurt you”, He said, clearly fighting with himself. _

_ “You won’t”, I said, as he was about to protest again I placed his hand on my breast, and I cannot stress this enough. The most guttural moan came out of my lips. I was that touch starved, and the only man I wanted was him. “I need you…” I said, putting my hands on his face. _

_ He leaned towards me, scrunching his nose as his mouth opened, unsure on where to kiss me. Before I leaned towards him. He close his mouth making his teeth clank inches away from my face. _

_ “I need you Dr. Reid”, I said, and that seemed to do the trick. It had been a while, so of course it was quick, and the next one wasn’t as quick. He had pulled the whole blindfold, roll play, slow burn thing, and I loved it, I realized then just how much I had missed him and he had missed me. _

  
  


“Are you sure you are okay?”, He asked.

“I will be, once you tell me where you are taking me”, I said, I felt him tug on my hand as he brought it softly to his lips.

“We are almost there”, and what was three songs later I felt him pulling the car over. The driver’s door opened and then close, a second later he was helping me out.

“Spencer”, I giggled. “Where are we?”, I asked as he carefully guided me, there was an excitement on my voice.

“you’ll see”, He said taking the blindfold off, I had my eyes close, so it took me a couple of blinks for my eyes to finally adapt to the sunshine. We were in a driveway, of a home. Derek was standing with another man I did not recognize.

“Spencer, what?”, I said confused, my mind racing.

“Come here”, He said leading the way, with a big smile on his face.

“Hey guys, it’s very nice to see you”, Derek hugged both of us. “This is Martin my contractor”, he pointed at the man next to him.

I waved slowly, very confused. His contractor, was this Derek’s home? 

“If you need anything”, he shook Spencer’s hand and mine as he walked away.

“I believe these are yours”, Derek handed me a couple of keys.

“What?”, I blinked slowly now, my eyes traveling to Spencer who was beaming.

“Welcome home”, He said softly.

“Is this?”, I finally looked around, trying to process.

“Morgan flips houses, about a year ago he bought this one and I thought it was perfect. So I decided to buy it from him once he finished, then you came into my life and I knew right away I needed this house, for the family we’d built”, His voice came slowly, as if he was holding back tears. “I understand if you are mad because I bought a house without you looking at it, but anything that you want to change, Morgan is here for that.”, He explained, now horrified at my lack of response.

“Honey…”, I said, tears forming in my eyes, “You bought me a house? you bought us a house?”, I said, I was ugly crying now.

“... Yes..?” He said as he moved his legs nervously.

“This is our home?”, I asked, just to make sure I wasn’t daydreaming. He nodded. “Oh God”, I threw myself at his arms, knowing he’d catch me, knowing he would never let me fall. 

“Do you guys want a tour?”, Derek asked after a second, I nodded enthusiastically Dragging Spencer with me.

Morgan was informative, letting us know of any changes he made to the house, explaining some features and answering any questions Spencer had. “So there was a little area up here”, He said when we got upstairs. “We torn down the wall to make it open, like a family area. We are still working on the bathroom here, but we should be done tomorrow. (y/n) will have to choose a carpet though.”, He said I looked around in awe. “I figured it was fair since Reid had me do most of the remodeling.”

When you had finished looking the bedrooms and the bathrooms Derek let you downstairs.

“Reid mentioned you have a dog so I made sure to leave enough space here for that. Still there is plenty of partying space as you can see”, He said showing you the backyard. There was a little roofed area with elevated wood floor. I hugged Spencer closely as he walked you around the common areas.

“Now, here is something Spencer hasn’t seen, this is the main bedroom”, Derek said opening a door. “Of course it has its own bathroom, walk in shower, a big tub and everything. But, if you open this door”, Derek said walking towards a door that was in the bedroom. He gestured for me to open it. I did, a little room, with a window, and a crib in the middle, it had a big bow on it. “A nursery, originally this was an office, and it wasn’t connected, but when you told me the news I took the liberty to do this, as you can see the room opens to the main hallway as well. Whenever you two are done having babies we can remove the door and it’ll go back to being an office.” Derek smiled. “The crib is just a little congratulations gift.”

“Morgan, thank you”, Spencer said, surprised as he shook the man’s hand.

“Thank you”, I said hugging him.

“Anything for you guys”, he hugged me back. “I also left it with no paint so you guys can decide.” I nodded my head running my fingers through the crib a white crib that was soon to be the first bed of our baby. Tears ran down my face.

“Thank you”, I hugged Spencer now, sobbing in his arms.

“I will leave you guys, if you need anything let me know”, Morgan patted Spencer’s shoulder, I couldn’t bring myself to let him go. I was so deeply in love with the man. 

“Hey”, Spencer pulled me away enough to see my face. 

“Spencer this is our house”, I said still crying. “Where our children will be born and raised”, He softened at the words as he pulled me back in.

“I’m so glad you weren’t angry”, he kissed my forehead.

“How could I be angry you silly? You are giving us a home Spencer.” I kissed him now, feeling the overwhelming sensation that was love. 

  
  
  
  


I was sitting on his lap, while he sat on the nursery floor.

“Spencer I think we need to talk”, I said, he pulled me closer.

“About what?”, He asked carefully.

“About your job”, I played with the curly hair in the back of his head.

“Okay…”, He said softly scanning my face for any signs I would give him.

“I know you love the BAU, and I know you haven’t told the guys you will not be going in the field.”, I started.

“I will as soon as I come back from paternity leave, or while I’m at it.”, He explained, a smile tugging in the corner of his mouth.

“I think you should think things through. I know you talked to Rossi who told you about other units you could join, but I know that would be a weird transition on you. So I want you to be sure about what you want to do. I will not be teaching next year.” I confessed, his face dropped.

“(y/n) no, you love your job”, He said with guilt on his face.

“I know, I really do, but I’ve always wanted a baby. I want to be able to enjoy my pregnancy. Besides our son is due in the first week of January, I wouldn't be able to go back for the second semester.”, I said, running my fingers through his jaw, the stubble tikling my finger tips. He nodded I could hear the gears turning in his head. “I will take the time off to get my certification to teach Special Ed”, I added.

“Have I told you how amazing you are?”, He smiled rubbing my back.

“You have, but I wouldn’t mind hearing it again.”, I chuckled. “But for real, With me home you have a whole year to decide what you want to do. Whatever you do I know it will be the right thing. With me home you’ll have to worry less about little peanut, or so I figured”, He inspected my face before giving me a small kiss on the lips.

“You figured wrong”, he pursed his lips. “Because you and little peanut are the most important things in my life and I would live the rest of my days to worship both of you”, He said.

“Still I think my decision of retreating from the field is final”, he said and I nodded. “But you are right with you home I’ll be able to also decide for myself if I want to join the team out there.”

I smiled, I loved this man and him being happy made me happy. He rubbed my nose on his, now kissing me properly. I continued the kiss. We stayed quiet for a second, immerse in our thoughts in the room that was soon to be occupied by our baby. 

“I was thinking, regardless of gender we should do a nature themed nursery”, I said running my fingers through his arms.

“With little forest creatures”, He smiled visualizing. “I think our daughter is going to love that.” He placed his hand on my belly.

I opened my mouth to correct him and say son but then I felt it. I had been feeling the tingling sensation lately but I thought it was just my over sensitive body. This time it was clear, a little sensation like electricity was coming from inside my body, but this time like a push.

“Spencer the baby kicked”, I said, eyes wide open.

“What?”, he said putting his hand back on my belly, and there it was, as if in command, another one.

“Do you feel it?”, He shook his head as he frantically pulled my dress up to make skin to skin contact. There it was again. This time his eyes met mine, he looked as surprised as I did, he quickly put me in the floor carefully as he lowered himself to my stomach. He did the humming he always did to try and communicate with the baby, I could feel tears falling on my skin. And there it was again, this time about three consecutive kicks.

“I think he is saying hi”, I cried putting my hands where I had last felt the kick. 

“She”, He said kissing my belly before coming up and peppering kisses on my face.

“We will find out in nine days”, I reminded him.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Okay, so what is the final one?”, I asked into the receiver.

“Ok mama here we go, Team baby girl; Me, JJ, Rossi, Will. Team baby boy aka team that is about to lose; Morgan, Emily and Hotch”, Garcia said, as you heard people arguing in the background. “of course they are not in on this but Henry and Jack both said they wanted a baby girl cousin because they need a wonder woman in their justice league.”

I smiled at that, I could only imagined how spoiled of a girl it would be. If it was a girl, which it was not.

“Hotch changed his mind?”, Spencer asked furrowing his eyebrows.

“Yeah, apparently Morgan convinced him, I know my love, bummers”, She said.

“And is everyone one hundred percent sure that they want to do this?”, I asked. 

“Yes, everyone has swore in. So now you guys go in and let us know about the little girl, I love you”, she said hanging up.

I smiled at Spencer as he ran his fingers through my exposed belly.

“I’m about to prove you wrong Dr Reid”, I joked taking his hand.

Dr Arya entered the room smiling. “So are we all set?”, she asked.

I nodded my head. 

“Hopefully the baby’s in a good position for us to see it”, She squeezed the liquid as she starting looking for the baby. She stopped though, staring at Spencer, who was concentrating mouthing something at the monitor. She studied him for a second. “Did you learn how to read an ultrasound?”, she asked, narrowing her eyes at him. She had come to understand that anything Spencer could do to know about the baby he would, the man had no boundaries. 

“Spencer!”, I chastised him, I didn’t even need to answer, the shy smile on his face told me everything.

“Ok”, she said thinking, “What about I move the monitor away until I find the baby and get in position, then I can show you the image and you can tell her the gender?”, She said Spencer nodded happily.

“I told you not to do that”, I whispered smacking his arm, he giggled. A big smile planted on my face as the Doctor tried to find what we were looking for.

“Ok here we go”, She said finally moving the monitor back to our way.

I saw Spencer as he moved closely, squinting his eyes at the image. As soon as he knew I knew. His hand traveled to his open mouth, with tears streaming down his face as he looked at Dr Arya for reassurance.

“Spencer what is it, tell me”, I whined, feeling my heart palpitations.

He looked at me, still with his mouth open, he closed it and opened it again, unable to speak. I had seen Spencer happy, angry, sad, pensive, shy. I had seen every version of Spencer there was to see, everything except this. Spencer Reid was speechless.

“We are having a baby girl”, his voice came as a whisper, my eyes shot at the Doctor who just nodded. 

“We are having a baby girl?”, I asked, my hands going to my tummy. He nodded before hugging me. Now we were both crying. “A little girl”, I repeated dumbly.

A little girl, a little me walking around. A little girl that Spencer would follow around the house, our house. Our little girl.

“I love you”, he said, his voice was raspy and low.

“I love you too”, I said rubbing his back.

  
  
  


“Drumroll please”, I said pointing at Garcia who started making the sound with her hands. We were sitting in a bar, the whole team had decided not to drink alcohol in solidarity, which made my heart swell.

“We are having”, I looked at Spencer

“A girl”, we said at the same time, as he hugged me closer. I heard everyone start to freak out.

“I knew it”, JJ hugged Spencer. 

“Oh a little girl”, Garcia pouted with her eyes wet.

“Guys congrats, seriously this is about to be the most spoiled girl ever”, Morgan said sending us a warm smile.

“yeah, but that means team baby boy lost”, Garcia clicked her tongue.

“As your superior I think this is extremely inappropriate”, Hotch said in a serious tone.

“That is your fault for switching teams at the last minute”, Spencer said, making the group laugh. Aaron tried not to smiled but failed.

“Make your way”, JJ stood up waving her hand, before she went to talk to one of the servers.

As Emily stood up she bended in front of my belly. 

“Traitor”, she whispered, a playful smile on her lips as she made the way with the others.

  
  


The rest of the table turned around to enjoy the show.

“Hello everyone”, Morgan said into the microphone, everyone in the room turning to see them. “We are team boy, the losing team, and we’ll like to sing a song for you guys”. Morgan said pointing at the computer guy.

As soon as the music Started the whole bar erupted in laughter. The trio stood on a small stage, screens with the lyrics around them.

  
  


Aaron approached the microphone, looking at serious as ever. “ Listen up, y'all, 'cause this is it The beat that I'm bangin' is de-li-cious”, he said, not even trying to follow the actual rhythm.

“C’mon Hotch”, Rossi yelled looking satisfied.

“Fergalicious definition make them boys go loco They want my treasure, so they get their pleasures from my photo”, Morgan started singing. The bar just wouldn’t stop laughing through the whole thing. Emily and Aaron joined him as the team danced around now that they were standing up.

“This is the crazy family you are coming into”, Spencer bended on his side to talk to my belly. I smiled placing his hand where I felt her kick. He smiled contently kissing the side of my head. “My two favorite girls”, he sighed hugging me close to him, as the whole place helped with the chorus of the song.

This is the crazy family our little girl was coming into, and I couldn’t be happier.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BTW I don't know a lot about pregnancy so that is why I'm going so fast. I also am super excited for you guys to finally get to see daddy Spencer, because if you thought this was cute before you have no idea.

I sat on the chair we had put on the Bedroom, eating my way through a party size bag of doritos. I sipped from the giant drink on my other hand. Spencer had told me many times how bad sugary drinks and chips were, but right now he knew it was the only way of entertaining me. The man really was a genius. We were finally on the last trimester barely starting. The energy that had surge during the last months was slowly fading away. Still it was just nature to be stubborn and argue that I could help. 

“You want this color next?”, Morgan came out holding a bucket.

“Yep”, I smiled. “on the ceiling”, I added.

“You got it baby girl”, He flashed a smile at me. 

Derek had volunteered to help Spencer paint the nursery. Because God forbid I even got a whiff of the non toxic child safe paint that Spencer had gone to four places to find. He had sat me down in a chair where I could see everything, opened the windows and handed me the food. I cheerfully accepted, the baby already eager to see what I was about to eat. I patted my belly as I felt the baby move around. The nursery was looking beautiful, a soft green on the walls that faded into a darker green on the bottom. The ceiling would be a soft blue color mimicking the sky. ‘Whimsical Woodland’ was the term we had decided on.

“Spencer”, I called the man. He came out quickly, he looked so ready to hear anything I had to say. “I was thinking, since the changing table is going on the opposite wall we should probably put the wall stencils around the rocking chair”

“Sure thing honey”, he looked adorable, he was wearing an old gray hoodie. Derek told him that if he showed up on a vest to paint the nursery he was going to make sure he could not have any more kids. Since last time he had volunteered he blamed his outfit of choice for the fact he didn’t want to move planks of wood.

I looked around, the move was going smoothly, we tried to move little by little. We wanted to be all moved by the first of December though, to give plenty of time for Little Peanut to come, if she decided she wanted to meet us early. I shifted on my seat, as I felt a pressure on my ribs. I groaned putting my hand where the pain was.

“Are you okay?”, Spencer came out looking concerned. 

“Yeah, she kicked my ribs, not pleasant.” Spencer smiled before kneeling in front of me. His lips traveled to my belly.

He called his daughter, humming softly, the kid immediately made herself known. Such a daddy’s girl and not even here yet.

“You need to be gentle with mommy”, he whispered, my hands traveled to his cheek. “Me and uncle Morgan are trying to paint your room right now, we’ll go home as soon as we finish”, he said. Then he placed a gentle kiss where my hand was resting.

“If you are uncomfortable we can go home”, He looked up at me, I shook my head.

“It’s okay, I’m sure she will stop”, I smiled softly. “You need to stop worrying about me”

“Never”, he met my lips in a soft kiss.

“Okay Romeo I am about to climb the ladder, you need to spot me.”, Morgan came out with a long paint roller.

Spencer nodded as he made his way back into the nursery. Ugh how was this man literally perfect? I continued stuffing my mouth with the snacks. If this was the life Spencer had for us I was more than ready. I grabbed the book on baby names that was next to me, scanning through the different categories.

“Catherine”, I said reading another one, a silence fell on the phone.

“No”, he finally said.

“Katie?”, I asked now.

“No”, he said again.

“Any variable of Emily? Emma, Emmy?”, I said, as my eyes traveled through the list.

“No”, he said. “We can just call her (y/n)”, Spencer said.

I scrunch my nose up, before realizing he couldn’t see me.

“No”, I said into the receiver.

“Okay then we brought the list down to…. forty five names”, I said looking at the computer screen.

“That is not as bad as I thought”, he sighed.

“Yeah at this point she’ll have a name at 24”, I joked, I could hear the scoff.

“Bold of you to assume she is going to grow, she will grow until she turns three then she’ll forever remain my little princess”, He said. I smiled at that.

“Sure, like one of those puppy dogs that stay small forever?”  
“Exactly like that”, He said, there was a pause, and I knew, even when he was in LA away on a case I knew what his mind was thinking.

“We had a good day over here yesterday, we went shopping for some wall art, and we called grandma. We also found a really good donut shop on our way back”, I rubbed my belly, the baby must be asleep right now.

“That’s good, what did you guys have?”, He asked, a soft voice. He knew what I was trying to do.

“Bacon and chocolate”, I said smiling.

“Ew”, was his only response.

“Don’t say anything, that is what your daughter wanted”, I chuckled.

“Like that time you ate a tub of ice cream after eating pickles?”, he asked at which I just stayed quiet.

“Yeah”, I said after a while, making him laugh.

“We also went to yoga”, I said.

“Good, how was that?”

“Like always, everyone asked about you”, I knew I probably shouldn’t have said that as soon as I said it. He had been not happy about leaving his seven months pregnant girlfriend alone. Specially since on our last appointment they said that the baby was developed. That meant that if she came out right now she would be a preemie, which the doctor said it was very unlikely given the fact that I had no complications.

I liked being pregnant, well if we ignored that I was hungry all the time, I was hot all the time, I was sore all the time. My feet swelled at night, My back hurt all the time. The baby was using my bladder as a football. And there had been several times that I had forgotten what I was doing all together. My mommy brain was bad.

“I miss you guys”, he said, I could hear the pain on his voice.

“We do too, but I told her daddy is away being a superhero”, I smiled. “And he would be back for his birthday, which by the way, do you want to do anything for that?”, I asked, trying to stir the topic away.

“Not really, I want to spend time with my girls.”, I smiled softly. We had also asked his mom if she wanted to come visit, she had been having a couple of good months. She had said that it was better for her to not come, if there was an emergency she would just be in the way. I knew Spencer felt bad about that, as right as she was. That was another thing, those two were always right.

“You got it”, I smiled, I grabbed the bowl of fruit that had been on the coffee table.

Spencer stayed quiet for a while.

“Spencer I’m going to eat now, do you want to talk to her?”, I asked, hoping that would make him feel better. I eyed the clock, it was six AM where he was, I wanted the man to go to sleep until he had to go back to work. Still I knew he wouldn’t, I would make sure he caught up in some Z’s this weekend. 

“yes please”, His voice broke my heart. It was clear he was missing her a lot.

“Okay you are on speaker”, I announced.

“Hi my little girl, how are you?”, he said, the phone laid on my belly. “I hope you are taking care of mommy like I asked you to, well I know you are. You know, Aunt Penelope came with us, and she bought you a bunch of gifts last night, I’m sure you’ll love them”, He started telling her about LA, and about her aunts and uncles.

The baby shifted, as in trying to find the source of the voice. I smiled rubbing my belly lightly.

“You woke her up”, I said.

“I’m sorry”, he said.

“That’s okay my love, we’re okay”, There was a pause again, and it pained me that no mattered how many times I told him it was okay he would still worry too much. “Spencer we love you so much.”

“And I love you, my sweet little girls”, he said. I pouted at that. 

I had fallen into a deep sleep, Spencer had called saying that the case was done but the team was exhausted, after talking with him for a while I just drifted. It wasn’t until I was awaken by hands around my body that I stirred.

“Spencer”, I said immediately recognizing his body pressed against mine.

“Hi”, he said, spooning me closer to him.

“You said you wouldn’t be able to make it until tomorrow, what happened?

“Well the team said that I looked miserable and they agreed that I should get back home”, he chuckled, but there was a pain in his voice.

I rolled, now facing him, I placed my hand in his face. He did look miserable, he looked haunted.

“Talk to me”, I prompted, he buried his face on my neck. His hands running through my belly. I didn’t want to push him, I wanted him to tell me what was happening.

“The case, a guy had kidnapped three young women, they were all fifteen.”, He started, I ran my fingers through his hair. “The kind of girls who are just… they volunteered, they were straight A students, they had no enemies. The pictures around the houses showed happy girls you know?”, I nodded my head.

“Are they…?”

“No, we got to them they are safe, they are at home. But as I watched them hug their parents I couldn’t help but see the ruined innocence, three girls who are probably going to be scare of the world.”, I pulled him closer, as close as the belly would let me. He placed his hand on my tummy again. “How am I going to… how can I see her in the eye, knowing what I know. And not tell her what the world does to girls who see the beauty in everything? What am I going to do when she asks me about monsters? When she runs to us when she has nightmares”, I could feel the shakiness in his voice, I searched his glazed eyes.

“We don’t, we tell her the truth, we tell her that there are things out there, things that are going to be scary”, He flinched so I started rubbing his face with my thumb. “And we make sure she knows that her dad and her mommy will always be there, to protect her. We’ll be there to help her. We tell her about the countless times her dad has put monsters away for good.”, He sighed closing his eyes. “We love her no matter what Spencer.”

“(y/n)?”

“Yeah?”

We just look into each other’s eyes for what seemed to be forever.

“I love you more than anything”, I smiled hugging him again.

“I love you too darling”, I replied. 

“What are you doing”, Spencer said horrified, running to where I was and putting his hands around my waist.

“I’m organizing”, I whined.

“On a step ladder? I don’t think so”, He helped me get down.

“It’s very sturdy”, I defended myself, his eyes just shot up.

“Sure”, He guided me out of the office, Morgan had built in shelves for Spencer and I was just putting some books away. “That doesn’t mean you should be in elevated sufraces.

“One foot Spencer”, I rolled my eyes.

“Yes, but your center of gravity shifts during pregnancy, what if you lose balance?”, He asked exasperated.

“I won’t do it again, I promise”, I say meeting his eyes.

“Why were you organizing anyway?”, he asked now making me sit on the couch.

“Because you haven’t let me move anything, or help in any way shape or form.”, I played with the neck of his sweater, trying to sound as innocent as I could.

“Yeah, because you are creating a life inside you”, he shot back, I smiled before putting a kiss on his lips. “I will need to keep an eye on you”, he said kissing me back.

“That sounds very interesting doctor”, I said on his lips.

“I’ll stay so close you’ll be tired of me”

“That sounds great”, I smiled and he rolled his eyes.

“Mommy is just so stubborn, and then she says that she isn’t but it’s okay because she is cute”, He said now lowering himself to my belly. “And I know you’ll be just as cute so that is going to be a problem uh? Daddy is going to be in trouble when you’re here”. He smiled pressing his lips on my belly and humming. The baby started moving on my belly as his smile grew wider. “You are squeamish today aren’t you?”, he asked.

“I think she just wants birthday cake”, I said.

“Oh does she now?”, He asked playfully, I nodded my head with a smile.

“Happy birthday Spencer”, I said as he got closer to my face, my lips quickly finding his.


	14. Chapter 14

I drizzled honey on top of the bowl, making sure to add enough to coat all the granola.

“What time is it?”, Spencer’s croaky voice made me looked up at him. He looked adorable, his hair was a fluff in the top of his head, he was still wearing everything from last night’s work and he was missing a sock.

“A little past noon”, I smiled, he rubbed his eyes.

“I slept fourteen hours?”, He asked, his eyes barely conforming to the light. “Why didn’t you wake me up?”

I smiled beckoning him with my hand. He walked drowsily to the place I was standing in. I started undoing his loose tie and taking it off. 

Yesterday had been the last day Spencer was going to work before his leave. He had come home a mess from trying to squeeze as much work in, so after we ate I tried and succeeded to make him fall asleep on the bed. In the morning when I woke up I was going to undress him but that might have woken him up, so I didn’t risk it. 

“Because you looked like you were having a good night’s sleep. And Aaron made me promise you’d get some of those”, I said undoing his buttons, once it was done I helped him get the shirt off his shoulders.

“He did?”, he asked, he still looked sleepy.

“Yeah, and he was right, you needed to sleep.” Now that he was standing there with his under shirt I smiled satisfied.

“Hmmm, so you took all the devices out so I didn’t know the time, and closed the curtains so that I didn’t see the light?”, He asked grabbing the clothes, I nodded smiling. “Smart move”.

I beamed at that, taking a spoon and breaking into the yogurt concoction in front of me. I drove the spoon to Spencer’s mouth who accepted it. 

“It’s been a while since you slept like that uh?”, I knew for a fact it had been.

“I always sleep good with you by my side.”, he stood behind me, throwing his clothes on the counter and hugging me by the shoulders.

“I will still make sure you have plenty of sleep for the next couple of weeks before you have to wake up in the evening to a crying baby Dr Reid”, I said giving another spoonful after I had eaten one.

“I would wake up in the evening everyday for the rest of my life for our kids Mrs Reid”, He said planting a kiss on my cheek. I smiled at that name, it sounded really good.

“I see no ring on my finger”, I chuckled, i felt his arms part from around me and a hand making me turn around, I watched as he started to kneel. Then I stopped him. “Spencer…”

He just stood there, inspecting me. “I will, soon.” He smiled now, pulling me closer, as closer as an eight months pregnant belly let me. I knew he wasn’t really going to ask me, it had been his little game later, and honestly it made my heart flutter every time.

“I will say yes, just so you know. So if I were you I would think twice about it”, I smiled, putting my hands on his neck.

“You have been the only thing I’m sure about in life”, He said, kissing my lips softly.

“I thought that was supposed to go on my side of the bed, for when the baby woke up crying for food?”, I asked, walking into the bedroom and seeing the bassinet by his side of the bed.

“Well, I can always wake you up if we need you, but babies wake up for many reasons, not only food”, he explained sitting on the bed. I was too tired to say that I already knew that. He had read so many pregnancy books to me I was sure I could become an expert on pregnancy once mine was done.

It was Christmas Eve, and we had stayed home having a small meal. The team was coming the next day to spend Christmas day together. I was extremely excited, the baby was coming very soon, my due date was in ten days. I wanted to spend time with the guys before we actually became responsible for a little human.

“Sure”, I rubbed my belly, the baby had been fussy all day today. I walked to the bed and sat down.

“Are you okay?”, Spencer asked sitting closer to me, I nodded my head. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, she is kicking extra hard today”, I smiled, reassuringly.

He lowered himself and pressed his lips against my belly, doing that humming thing I had become so accustomed to. Immediately I felt the baby kick again. 

“Are you kicking mommy?”, He asked, another kick. “I think you are just excited to come meet us uh? You will, very very soon and we’ll have so many adventures together.”

I smiled looking down at them. Spencer had his head on my lap, his fingers drawing on my skin as the baby seemed to follow the movement of his fingers.

“Ready to go to sleep?”, he yawned after a minute, sitting up just to pull the blanket and lie down.

“I think I will stay awake a while, I know I won’t find a comfortable position”, I said tiredly.

“I can stay up if you want”, he said, I shook my head.

“No babe, you sleep. Maybe if I see you I’ll get tired enough”, I smiled.

He pulled my hand to his lips and kissed it. I saw the time, an hour till midnight.

“This time next year, I’ll be dressing up as santa and sneaking presents under the tree”, His eyes were now close, his voice a murmur like if he was dreaming it.

I smiled at his comment. Knowing that he probably will. I rubbed my belly as the discomfort grew stronger. I had a hot flash, so I decided to stand up and grab some water.

“Where are you going?”, Spencer asked, his eyelids heavy.

“I’m just going to grab some water, go to sleep”, I said softly, he seemed to follow my command as I walked to the kitchen.

Once in there I served myself a cold glass of water, drinking it as I saw the backyard. Snow covered every square inch on the place. I smiled, it was going to be a beautiful Christmas day. I cradled my belly, feeling the baby still moving, I finished the water just as I felt a sharp pain. 

The glass breaking to pieces around me. Shit, at least there wasn’t any water in it.

“(y/n)!”, Spencer ran out of the bedroom. “What happened?”, he tried to walk towards me, I put my hand up to stop him.

“There’s glass on the floor”, I said, through an exhale, the pain was gone now.

“Oh”, he said now noticing the pieces around me. “What happened?”

“I don’t know I think she kicked too hard, go get the broom and dustpan”, I said without moving from my spot.

“I think we need some towels for the water”, He said. 

I shook my head, “I drank the…”, that’s when I actually noticed the puddle around me, but this water was warm… “Spencer…”

“Yeah”, he said, coming back with a towel.

“My water just broke”, I said, seeing the colors drain from his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short Chapter I know. The next one is pretty long though.
> 
> Is everyone ready to meet baby Reid? Place your bets for the name.


	15. Chapter 15

“Spencer”, I called him again, my mind rushing,

I’m having a baby.

“Spencer”, I raised my voice, his face pale, his eyes wide open and his jaw dropped.

“Spencer”, No response.

I’m having a baby, I need to get to the hospital, I need to time my contractions, I need Spencer not to pass out. How am I going to take the noodle man to the hospital? Oh God.

“REID”, I yelled this time, as another pain sprawled on my pelvis. That seemed to do the trick, he quickly but carefully approached me. “Spencer Reid listen to me”, I groaned. “You need to clean this up okay? When you are done I’m going to take a shower”, I explained, he was nodding his head.

“You need to go to the hospital”, he exclaimed, his tone indicated that his brain had a big break through. For the first time in my life I wanted to punch the man as the pain stopped again.

“Babe I really need that IQ of 187 here okay?”, I said, as he knelt to clear my path. He nodded.

“Contractions are coming far apart, I will call the doctor, c’mon let me help you”, he carefully guided me to the shower, once I was inside he left.

“Ow”, I said slightly bending when another one came. This one was longer. I saw Spencer enter the room, already changed, he saw his watch and nodded.

“Ok”, he said getting me out of the shower. He helped me put on some sweats and a shirt.  
Once that was done he guided me to the door, his arm around me.

“IT HURTS”, I said again, an understatement really. I gripped the front door as he soothed my back. 

“We are at 11 minutes,”, He put a thick coat around my body as we walked out to the car, once there he reclined the seat enough and made me step in.

“We need to send the text”, I groaned.

“I know I know”, he said hopping in and starting the car. I saw him type something and put the phone away. “I will drive slowly okay? if it starts hurting too bad you let me know okay?”, I nodded.

“Dr Arya?”, I asked, my breathing getting heavier.

“On her way”, he started driving once the car had heated enough.

I looked over at him, the man looked a mess, but his eyes were focused.

“We are having a baby”, I said, once his eyes met mine. I realized this was the first time in a good forty minutes he actually realized it. His expression softened as he grabbed my hand. The guy was probably working out of his logic.

“let’s go have our baby girl”, he nodded, getting his eyes back on the road.

We got to the hospital quicker than I thought, well quicker considering the fact that I was in excruciating pain.

“eight minutes”, I could see the concern on his face. The nurse nodded his head as another approached me with a wheelchair, Dr Arya had made it before us and was waiting.

“What’s wrong?”, I asked him.

“Nothing, everything is fine my sweet girl”, he kissed my forehead before the elevator doors opened.

“Dad I need you to fill this”, a woman, who I recognized from the Doctor’s office approached him with a clipboard.

“Spencer”, I called out to him, I needed him.

He looked between me and the clipboard. “I’ll be quick, I promise”, he said his hand scribbling on the papers.

“Okay, you are doing amazing”, Doctor Arya said closing my legs again. “Do you want to stand up?”, she asked, I nodded my head, standing put pressure but got rid of the horrible back pain. I had already changed in a hospital gown.

“How are we”, Spencer burst into the room.

“We are perfectly fine, Dad you can help mom do some breathing exercises?”, she said, Spencer nodded approaching me.

“Hey”, he rubbed my lower back, I turned to him, grabbing his shoulders.

“It hurts”, I cried.

“I know baby I know”, he said instructing me to inhale and exhale on a methodical rhythm.

I followed his instructions until another one came.

“Doctor”, he called out.

“Okay sweetheart you are being really strong, do you want to lie down for me?”, I nodded as Spencer helped me climb on the bed.

“Doctor Arya”, he said his eyes meeting the woman.

“I know”, she said now, nodding her head as she inspected me again. “We are at six”

“What is happening?”, I asked, seeing the concern in their faces, Spencer almost looked gloomy.

“Nothing”, he gave me a small smile.

“What is happening? is the baby okay? Is she okay? Please don’t lie”, the tears started pooling in my eyes.

“(y/n) we believe you are experiencing precipitous labor”, Doctor Arya said.

I knew what that meant. The contractions were coming too fast, the odds for the baby were good, but...

“The baby is safe right?”, I asked, she nodded. I sighed as another contraction came. 

“Hey”, Spencer said helping me back on the bed. 

“Spencer it hurts”, I cried out.

Time was a blur, I had lost count of how many times nurses had entered the room, and exited. 

“You are doing fine okay? We have nothing to worry about, precipitous labor only increases risks, you were low risk the whole pregnancy. I need you to breath with me okay?”, She started instructing me to change my breathing patterns.

“Spencer”, I gripped his arm as another one came, they were getting far far worse.

“We are at ten!” The doctor exclaimed. “(y/n) do you feel pressure right now?”, I nodded my head, I was feeling pressure alright. “Let’s start pushing.”

“No”, I said now horrified. 

“baby?”, Spencer said taking my hand.

“I can’t do it Spencer I’m so sorry, I can’t do it”, I started crying as the panic closed my chest. The room became a blur for a second.

“Do you remember what happened when your water broke?”, Spencer’s voice came as a plead. I nodded my head. “You went full mommy mode (y/n) we are ready for this okay?”, He said.

“yess…”, I dragged the s while the pain made me close my eyes. 

“(y/n) hear me out, I haven’t met anyone as brave as you, you can do this alright? You are strong enough. I’ll be right here by your side, the whole time.”, He said, the tears streaming down my face. “Our baby is so close to being with us”

“our baby”, I sobbed, The pain was unbearable, but we were finally going to meet our little girl.

“Okay momma when the next contraction comes I need you to push for me”, She said.

As soon as I felt the pain again I started pushing.

There was only so much I could hear and I could understand. 

“You are doing great” “we are crowning” “keep going” “Vitals?”

The pain was the worst thing I have ever felt, I squeezed Spencer’s hand harder, his fingers were white at this point.

“We are almost there (y/n)”, I heard her say.

I propped myself up with my elbows and pushed as hard as possible.

“Almost there, one more”, She said. I pushed and pushed until a relief washed over my body.

I saw Spencer’s face softened, and then a shrill cry filled the room..

“A beautiful baby girl”, Dr Arya announced, as I could barely see the tiny head.

“Does dad want to cut the cord”, a nurse asked handing him the scissors.

Once Spencer came back to my line of sight he was crying, so was the baby. Our baby.

The doctor handed her to me, she was covered in a white substance and blood, I barely had a chance to see her when she was pried away from me. I reached when another nurse approached me.

“We are going to get her ready okay?”, He said with a warm smile.

“Spencer…” I whispered, I felt the other nurse retrieve from between my legs.

“We are fine”, she nodded her head, helping me close my legs.

Spencer sighed relieved, he brushed his hair with his hand as he helped me sit up now.

“19.35 inches, 6.7 pounds”, The nurse finally turned around with the crying baby. “Congratulations”, He said placing her on my waiting arms.

She was tiny, a tiny human. As soon as a cradled her closer she stopped crying, and I started. Tears freely falling from my eyes. “Hi…”, I said softly.

“Spencer…”

“I know, she is perfect (y/n)”, he said, sitting next to me. He kissed my head. “You did so good”, I could feel the shakiness on his voice, his eyes meeting his daughter one more time.

She looked like him, she opened his eyes, looking around. I chuckled.

“Look at her…” Spencer put his hand softly on her, she immediately took his index finger on her tiny hand. Spencer started sobbing.

“hi baby, this is mommy, and this is daddy.”, I spoke with my baby voice, whispering as the child made a squeaky sound. “We’ve been waiting for you.”

“Mom, dad, do we have a name yet?”, we both looked up to the nurse.

We looked at each other with big smiles on our faces.

Spencer held the baby as she slept. I smiled perched as his side, we were both sitting on the bed.

“Hi…”, Penelope said walking in, with the whole team behind her.

“Hi guys”, I smiled.

“How are we doing?”, Morgan asked softly.

“Like we just went through six hours of labor.”, I joked. I saw JJ approach the bed cautiously.

“You look beautiful kiddo”, Rossi said smiling. I smiled back at him mouthing a tired thank you.

“Spence…”, JJ said pouting.

“Spencer she looks like you”, Emily smiled.

“No she doesn’t”, he looked at the kid, inspecting her for a second before his smile came back on his face.

“She is beautiful, congratulations” Hotch said, with a soft smiled.

The baby opened her eyes slightly, squirming a little. She seemed to be interested on the people who had walked in, her eyes traveling around slowly.

“These are your aunts and uncles… guys we want you to meet Abigail Reid”, Spencer smiled.

“That is a beautiful name”, Emily smiled holding her hands under her chin.

“Abby Reid… oh jeez”, Garcia had tears in her eyes as Derek hugged her.

“It derives from hebrew, it means my father’s joy.”, I explained, I saw a couple of heads nodding as they saw the way Spencer looked at the baby.

“Can I?”, JJ asked reaching her arms out, Spencer slowly helped her put the baby in her arms.

“Hi Abby”, she said clicking her tongue softly as the baby took a big yawn.

“She is the cutest little thing”, Emily said as the whole team gathered around looking at the girl. Who just cooed as she watched everyone.

“Quite the Christmas present uh?”, Morgan said. They took turns holding her for a little, as Spencer watched carefully. He held his breath every time the baby passed from one person to the other. I placed my hand on his thigh reassuringly.

After a little bit she got squirmish and came back to my arms, where I cradled her close to me, feeling the way her soft skin felt against mine.

“I really appreciate you guys coming, but I think you should go back and spend Christmas at home, it’s like seven am”, I said.

“We’ll be back later”, they started saying, They had been there for the past two hours waiting. Everyone looked tired

“JJ, Morgan”, Spencer called the pair over, they said goodbye to the rest and stayed behind.

“We want to ask you guys a very important question”, I said looking up at Spencer who just smiled.

“Would you guys be Abby’s godparents?”, he asked, to which the pair responded with a hug.

“Just so you know, as the Godfather I’m going to be awesome, she is going to love me. I’m going to be the cool uncle Morgan”, Morgan said smiling, as he hugged me careful of the baby.

“I love you guys” JJ said hugging him again. “You guys are my family”, she hugged me now.

“We love you too”, I smiled up at her.

“I need to get going though, I’ll be back, possibly with Henry depending on his mood.”, She tilted her head apologetically as she hugged the both of us and walked out.

“And I drove Garcia, take some rest. We are coming in the late afternoon.”, Morgan said now. “Bye Abby baby”, He leaned to see the girl, who just bought her tiny fist to her mouth. He smiled waving as he exited the room.

“Our little girl”, I said in the silence of the room now, as Spencer got back in the bed.

“We created something quite amazing”, Spencer smiled, his finger carefully rubbing her chin.

“We really did, she is perfect Spencer”, I looked down at her. She was the most beautiful kid, she did look like Spencer, she had his eyes and his nose, but she had my mouth. She also had some hair, although now covered by the little baby beanie.

“She really is”, He smiled. “Oh I want to try something” He said, almost with a childlike excitement. He leaned over her carefully, his lips touching the part of her tiny chest that was not covered by the blanket. He hummed lightly.

My bottom lip trembled a little. He had been doing that for the past seven months, and now she was finally here in my arms.

The baby slowly opened her eyes, meeting Spencer’s who just squeaked softly.

“Hi”, his voice was softer than ever. “Hey sweetheart... I love you so much”

The kid started fussing a little, so with Spencer’s help I positioned her, unbuttoning the gown. I moved the convenient slit as she quickly latched. It had been just as easy the first time, which the doctor congratulated me for.

“Remember how you got all dumb before?”, I chuckled at Spencer, whose eyes were on his little girl.

“yeah… I’m sorry about that”, he said, his eyes meeting mines now.

“I love you Spence, dumb and everything”, I joked again.

“I love you (y/n), to the point that you make me dumb”, he quipped back before giving me a soft kiss.

When I felt the baby stop I put a towel on my shoulder and proceeded to burp her softly. She was tiny, I could barely feel her weight in my arms.

A kock came from the door as a nurse walked in. 

“Hi, how are we doing”, she asked, when we both nodded she smiled. “We are going to blackout the room okay? so Mom can have some rest as well as dad. Do you guys want me to take her to the nursery?.”

I possessively shifted one of my hands to get Abby closer to me. I did not want anyone to take her away from me, which deep down I knew they were professionals but. But she was my baby, and she felt so right on my arms.

“Can she stay?”, Spencer asked, looking at us and then back at the nurse.

“That’s okay”, she smiled in a friendly manner. “Just know that we will be here if you change your mind. We really encourage you to get some rest though.”, She said walking into the room and drawing the curtains, then she proceeded to dim the lights. I felt the tiredness on my body. “Merry Christmas”, she smiled walking out.

It really didn’t take long for the three of us to fall asleep, the hospital room was unusually warm. We both slept looking at the little transparent bassinet where our daughter was. Where little baby Reid laid peacefully. It was quite magical how this little Christmas present would change everything from now on. Like a promise that although the past had been rough the road ahead looked bright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Abby Reid is finally here! Now brace yourselves for the cutest Dad!Spencer content.
> 
> A I'm really just writing as I go, I do have some ideas of things I want to do and write in this fic. I will continue to do so as long as you guys want. I appreciate you guys reading and I'm very happy that you seem to be enjoying it. <3


	16. Chapter 16

I placed the keys on the little table, careful as to not make too much sound. The house was quite which meant one thing. I kicked my shoes on the side. The girls had finally convinced me to go out with them, and no matter how many times Spencer had told me it was okay I still felt bad leaving them alone. 

I made the walk to the living room, where my boyfriend was sitting, his head forward and messy. His shoulders raised and dropped at the rhythm of his soft snoring. Abby was sleeping on his arms. Little girl was two months old, and she was as much as a daddy’s girl as I expected. She just seemed to love having him around, and so did he. I walked carefully prying her away from his arms, to my surprise he didn’t react. I quickly placed a pillow. He cradled it, and I walked to the nursery to put her on her crib. I turned the nanny cam on, taking one of the monitors with me. 

The house was a mess, well, it was a mess compared to how clean it normally was. But doing chores with a baby is extremely difficult. There wasn’t a routine, or a rhythm. We just tried to do as much as we could and as quickly as we could. I loaded the dishwasher, cleaned the counters and picked all the blankets from the living room floor. I saw Spencer stir a little. I bended over the coffee table, looking at the envelopes still sealed, I sighed.

Spencer finally opened his eyes, his face with a hint of panic for a moment before he noticed the nanny cam showing the video of our sleeping girl. 

“Hey”, He said, sitting up and rubbing his eyes with his hands.

“Hey”, I smiled, sitting next to him and throwing a blanket over us.

“How was it?”, He asked now hugging me close to him.

“It was okay, how was it over here?”, I asked him, snuggling closer to him.

“It was great, she was really good.”, He smiled.

“Isn’t she always an angel with you?”, I rolled my eyes playfully.

“That she is”, He said planting a kiss on my head.

“They sent you the files again?”, I asked after a second.

“Yeah… I still have eight days of leave though.” Spencer sighed, looking at the envelopes with the FBI seal on them.

“I know, but they seem to need you”

“You guys need me here”, he whined. I turned to see him.

“We do, but daddy needs to go back to work, and we understand that.”, I said, he looked too sad for my liking so I placed my hands on his cheeks.

“Strauss says that she will be understanding of my situation… She is promising that the task force will not be difficult.”, He explained. 

“Do you want to do it?”, I asked him.

“Do I want to lead my own task force? Yes, do I want to be away from home?”, Spencer said now, hugging me again. “No”.

“You won’t be in the field, it will be a nine to five, and when you get home we’ll be here to greet you”, I said, feeling the way his arms relaxed.

“I know, Hotch says I should definitely do it. It will probably last a couple of months.”

“Well I know that Morgan will be lost without you but he’ll survive a couple of months”, I joked. “They will understand that Dr Reid needs to do something else right now.”

“They will. I’ll call her”, he finally said, I nodded my head. I knew how hard it was for him to accept being away from Abby, but it had to be done sooner or later. 

Truth be told I did not want him to go, mainly because he had been the greatest support the past months. He had woken up each and every time she cried, even if it was just to stay awake as long as we were. He had been there every time I had lost my cool because sleeping only a couple of hours each week takes a bigger toll than what I thought. He even had been understanding on the fact that I was not ready at all for him to see my body. I was there when he broke down too, when he seemed to realize that at some point we had to go back to the world with a little person to come back home. I understood how hard it was for him. We made a good team when all said and done.

I smiled up at him, as he brought his face close to me, our lips only an inch away when we heard the high pitched cry coming from the monitor.

“I got her”, I said, giving him a small peck on the lips as I stood up.

“Hey baby”, I smiled picking her up, her cry ceasing a little as I started bouncing lightly with her. “Did you miss me? Because I missed you guys so much”, I said on my baby voice, as I felt her relax in my arms. I sat on the rocking chair as she quickly closed her eyes again, soothed by the movement.

“Hey”, Spencer came after a second, sitting in the floor in front of us. “I go back Monday”, he nodded.

“That’s good, we’ve got two days still”.

“Forty eight hours, Two thousand eight hundred and eighty minutes.” 

I rolled my eyes again. 

“Do you want to hold her?”, I asked him, he shook his head. 

“I enjoy watching you two together, it makes me happy”, he confessed softly, my heart skipped a beat. 

“Do you want to read us before we go to sleep?”, I asked, now he nodded his head, reaching for one of the books in the pile. I stood up, walking to the bedroom.

“I thought you said we should start trying to see how she did in the nursery?”, he asked, yet there was something happy in his voice.

“I did, but something tells me dad is just going to try to get her back somehow in the night”, I smiled, sitting in the bed with the baby in my arms, Spencer sat next to us. 

“Abby, this one is one of mom’s favorites.”, He said, positioning himself behind us, one arm around me.

“There was once a velveteen rabbit, and in the beginning he was really splendid. He was fat and bunchy, as a rabbit should be; his coat was spotted brown and white, he had real thread whiskers, and his ears were lined with pink sateen.”, he started the story.

They don’t lie when they say motherhood is the hardest of jobs. Abby wasn’t a difficult baby per se, but there were times in which nothing seemed to help her. I had tried everything, food, change her, I had moved from a cooler spot to a warmer one. I had bounced her, tried to play with her but nothing seemed to be getting her to stop crying. It broke my heart, even making me question how good of a mom I was. Then I got an idea. I went into the room and grabbed the first thing I could find of his, an old red sweater he hadn’t used in a couple of days, and I put it on me. I held her close, making sure she could snuggle against the soft fabric. Then she stopped. I was finally able to finish the dinner.

“(y/n)”, I heard Spencer’s voice from the front door, he walked to the kitchen where I stood with Abby on my arms.

I narrowed my eyes at him.

“There they are, my sweet girls”, He smiled, clearly not seeing my expression. “How did we do today?”, he asked, his smile dropping when he saw my face, then he saw my body and a cheeky smile appeared on his lips.

“Don’t you dare laugh Doctor Reid”, I cautioned, handing him the baby.

“She got fussy uh?”, He asked smiling.

“She got fussy alright.”, I smiled now, seeing the way he just melted when she snuggled up to him.

“I’m sorry”, He whispered.

“It’s okay babe, really. I just think she knows she’ll have you for the weekend now and was too eager.”, I said, starting to serve dinner. “How was work?”

“It was good, I went through three years of financial records. Once we are done there is no way that those companies are getting away with laundering again.”

“Your mom called”, I smiled up at him.

“Yeah she called me too, she wants more pictures to show her friends”, he smiled softly. I could tell there was something else he wanted to say.

“I’ll make sure to send her more”, I said. “We should definitely go visit her, as soon as you think we can with her.”

“Yeah, I could also bring her over. I will have to check with her doctors, she’s transitioning in meds right now.”, He said it as an afterthought, but I knew how hard it was in both of them every time she had to change meds.

“You didn’t tell me that before…”, I looked up at him, there was this gloomy cloud over his head.

“I didn’t want to put it on you, this being the first week alone with Abby and everything.”, He apologized.

“It wouldn’t babe, I promise, I need you to share your thoughts with me”, he just nodded at my words.

“I love you so much you know that?”, he said, I smiled playfully.

“You keep saying that Doctor Reid, but it seems to me that another girl owns your heart.”, I snickered.

He smiled, a real smile now, as he looked down. He then looked up at me again. I got closer to him. Giving him a soft kiss. 

“But I’m serious, next time I have to wear your clothes to stop her crying you’ll pay”, I said, taking the plates to the table.

“I cannot wait to see how you’ll make me pay”, he said from the kitchen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is like a transition chapter, before we start with the "milestones" chapters. If there are any baby milestones you guys want me to cover please let me know just so that I can add them. Of course soon we'll have Dr Spencer Reid with a toddler though. 
> 
> As always thank you guys for reading, your comments and kudos are the thing that keeps me writing. I hope everyone is staying safe.


	17. Chapter 17

I turned to see Spencer, the five month old had her face against his cheek, laughing every time he blew his cheeks up just to blow raspberries. The past months had been chaotic at best. I felt Abby was growing way too fast, but was glad she finally outgrew her crying all day phase. That hadn’t been a fun one, I was convinced that if Spencer and I hadn’t such a strong relationship we wouldn’t be together. Specially the weeks that we only got two hours of sleep each. Ever since the crying non stop phase had stopped she had become a very curious baby. The first time I heard her giggles had definitely been the happiest day of my life. She was with Penelope as she was making gestures at her, she seemed to be extremely entertained when she let out the most beautiful sound ever. Now she just wouldn’t stop, she loved playing peek a boo with me, and loved having her dad make mouth noises to her. Life had slowly but surely settled now, with Spencer back at work and us finding a routine. Although it had been a process, Spencer had find comfort behind the pile of paperwork, and it was good to finally see him be him again. I had found that housewife life was definitely not how they picture it, but I was happy nevertheless. 

“There he is”, I said, standing up when I heard the doorbell ring. I walked towards the door, opening to find Hotch at the other side.

“Hey”, I smiled.

“(y/n), how are you?”, He asked, shaking my hand.

“I’m doing fine, come on in, he is on the living room waiting for you.”, Hotch had called Spencer with some urgent news. The past month Spencer’s taskforce had found enough evidence to take down a local money laundering ring. The problem was that the people involved were powerful members of DC’s socialite. The stress of the situation could be seen in the bags around his eyes. “No Jack today?”, I asked him walking with him to the living room.

“No, he had a playdate”, He smiled at me. 

“Hi”, Spencer waved when we finally made it to the living room.

“Hello”, He smiled, reaching his arms for Abby, who accepted happily. “Hi sweetheart, how are you?”, He asked, the kid simply babbled at him. 

“She is been all personality this past week”, I smiled sweetly. The little girl had the whole BAU wrapped around her little finger.

“I bet, I remember how Jack was”, He twisted his lips and I chuckled.

“Can I offer you anything to drink?”, I asked.

“A coffee perhaps?”, he replied, I nodded my head walking to the kitchen to fix his drink.

I could hear them chatting about the taskforce, once I was done I walked back, handing him his drink.

“Thank you”, he took the mug and sat down, Abby was now back in her dad’s arms, sucking on her fist.

“I can take her if you want”, I offered, extending my arms for the kid, who just turned and buried herself on her dad.

“No, you can stay”, He said hugging her closer to him, I nodded. Sitting next to him I flattened my skirt, now that my body was closely resembling what it had been before pregnancy I was excited to come back to my old clothes.

“You said that they hired a firm?”, Spencer asked, curious as to why that made the man come all the way from his house.

“Yeah, I think you should see this”, Aaron had had a file under his arm, and was now handing it to Spencer. Whose eyes shot up when he read it.

“They paid good money too, in the six digits…”, Aaron clenched his jaw.

“So far any investments that these guys make are merely that, investments. Why pay this kind of money? They have enough knowledge on money to just give it away, if they are doing this is because they are sure it will be the thing that it saves them”, Spencer narrowed his eyes while he read the paper.

Abby extended her arms at me so I quickly pulled her to my lap. The kid quickly got comfortable in my embrace.

“I think they know your investigation would sink them, and the only option was to do this”, Aaron said, I noticed how his eyes traveled to me every couple of seconds.

“We might lose the case Hotch”, Spencer whispered, his voice breaking a little. When I got a glimpse of the paper he had in his hands my whole body tensed. I knew now why he was scared.

In the top of the paper was Harvey’s Law firm, my dad’s firm.

“(y/n)”, Hotch said, clearly reading my body language. God I forgot I was surrounded by profilers.

“I will, I will take Abby to her room, I think she is getting sleepy”, I gave them a small smile, it wasn’t a lie, the kid had burn her energy and was now drooling on the top of my dress. I quickly took her to the room.

There was something absolutely wrong with having the person I loved the most go against the person I hated the most. I took quick breathes as I fixed Abby her bottle. I had stopped producing much milk in the last few weeks. Abby had not liked the switch but once she made it she got a hold of it pretty quick. I sat on the chair, singing softly as she fell asleep on my arms. I hadn’t thought about my family in a long time.

Last time I saw them, well last time I saw them was a little after my birthday, when I was called to sign the last of paperwork for my trust. That day I had left the house crying, that day I ran to Spencer’s place who had no idea what had happened. I had been a good liar just telling him I had a rough day. I thought that was the last time I ever had to see them, but now? Did they even deserve to know I had a baby? Did they even care? 

I stayed in the room while Abby slept. My dad and my brother had ruined my life enough already, I could not let them… I did not want them to be part of my family. I thought the inevitable thoughts one has when your own baby is in your arms. Will she ever ask me about them? About her grandma, her grandpa? She had Diana, and William Reid had tried to contact Spencer a couple of months back when he found out, he didn’t answer though. The team was all the family she knew, Rossi had made a point of calling himself Papa, taking the role of her grandfather. That was funny and really cute, but what would happen when she actually asked about her blood?

I put her down on the crib, turning the monitor on and walking out. I saw the two men look up at me.

“She is sleeping now”, I explained, showing the little screen on my hand and sitting down where I had been before.

“I was telling Spencer he has airtight evidence, the probabilities of them being able to write that off are slim to none.”, Aaron said, swiping through some documents. 

“Your brother is acting as primary”, Spencer said, looking at me.

“Isn’t that, wouldn’t a relationship ruin that, the case? I mean because you are my boyfriend and he is my brother”, I asked, trying to formulate the question.

“No, there is no conflict of interest, Spencer is only presenting the investigation to the jury”, Aaron answered the question, I nodded my head.

“I can’t let the families down, the ones that have actually suffered because of their illegal practices”, Spencer said.

“You won’t”, Aaron reassured him, handing him the file. “I will need to go now, but please feel free to call me if you have any questions”, He smiled. 

“I’ll walk you out”, I said, walking with him to the door.

“How bad is it?”, I asked, crossing my arms.

“Strauss is putting a lot of pressure on him”, He said, “I know how hard he has work on this case. The only thing we can do is hope we win this one.”, He gave me a small smile, I nodded. “Take care”, he said before walking out.

I walked back to where Spencer was reading the files again. His body was diagonally, with his legs almost in the air and his back hunched over the coffee table.

“Don’t you have those memorize by now?”, I asked, my voice soft as I sat next to him.

“I memorize everything I read”, he tried to make it sound like a joke.

“You can beat them”, I said, running my hands on his shoulders and I knelt behind him. 

“What if I can’t?”, He whispered, taking my hand and holding it.

“You will”, I reassured him, placing a kiss on his temple.

“They win over seventy eight percent of the cases they take, they have a very impressive record considering the kind of people they defend”, He sighed.

“I know, but they haven’t been up against Spencer Reid the mighty professor”, I chuckled, I had stolen that nickname from Penelope a while back.

“Come here”, He said, pulling me into his lap. I didn’t resist, just sitting with my butt on the couch and my legs over his lap.

“I know that you will do everything you can Spencer”, I said, putting my head on his chest.

“Do they know about me?”, He asked, I shook my head.

“But you have told them about Abby?”, He asked again.

I looked up at him, his eyes were scanning my face.

“No”, I said, his lips pursed a little, his eyebrows furrowed.

“Any reason in particular?“, I just shrugged my shoulders biting my lip at his question. I had to ask myself that.

“Not really, but I think, I think they should know… I just don’t want them to be a part of her life”. I said.

“That’s okay, I understand”, he said. “If you don’t want them to meet her, they won’t.”

“I want them to know”, I nodded.

“Maybe we can arrange dinner?”, He proposed, I shook my head. There was no way I could sit with them for more than a couple of minutes.

“I’m still going to the trial”, I reminded him, he nodded understanding.

“I love you Spencer, you and her are my whole world”, I whispered.

“You are mine, and no one will ever take that away”, he said. I made our faces meet, our lips used to the feeling of the other’s. I separated just a little. We hadn’t done anything since Abby was born, At first I was reluctant of letting him see me, after a while it had been inevitable, then we didn’t really have time. I needed him just as much as he needed me. “No one”, he said again. This time he was quick in standing up, carrying me bridal style to our bedroom. 

“Her gums are starting to swollen, if she starts getting fussy out of nowhere you can try giving her one of the frozen breast milk pops from the freezer. All of the emergency information is in the fridge.”, Spencer said.

“Thank you for the heads up, I will not be getting anything from the freezer”, Derek said, trying to take the baby from Spencer, he simply walked around.

“This is her favorite blanket, do not put it on the crib with her, and make sure she is laying in her back the whole time. I will have my phone muted, but call (y/n) if you need anything.”, He said.

“Dude don’t worry we got this”, Derek rolled his eyes.

“We definitely do”, Penelope entered the room, taking Abby away without paying attention at the way Spencer didn’t want to let her go. It was at the end, the first time we both left her with someone else. “We are going to have so much fun aren’t we? Yes We are Yes We are”, Penelope clicked her tongue at her. Abby let out a giggle.

“They are waiting”, I said, extending my hand at him. He sighed, placing a small kiss on Abby’s head. The kid tried to extend her arms at him but Derek started pushing him out.

As we walked out the door we could hear her cries. He turned to see the now close front door.

“I can stay if you want”, I offered.

“No”, He sighed, “She is going to be fine”, it had been more of a question than a statement, I nodded my head.

Aaron and Rossi were both waiting in the car as we climbed in.

“We are late”, Rossi said, starting to drive.

Once we got to the courtroom Spencer was pulled by one of the lawyers, I crossed my arms walking in. Today was the big day, the final arguments were to be presented in the morning, with the hopes of having a decision reached by the end of the day.

I walked in the courtroom, Where a couple of people chatted.

“What are you doing here?”, I heard, turning around. My brother looked just like me, just a taller masculine version of myself. We both had gotten our looks from mom, but his personality, that was all our dad.

“Johnny”, I put on a smile. “How are you? long time no see”, I said.

“I know that only makes you happy”, He snarked back. “Trust me it makes me happy too. So what brings a kindergarten teacher to a courtroom?”, He asked again, his arrogant tone just made me want to scratch his face off.

“Johnny”, I heard a high pitch female voice behind us, she launched at his arms. “There you are silly”, She said. “OMG (y/n) how are you?”, Tiffany asked. Tiffany was his wife, well his second wife, she wasn’t the brightest tool in the shed. She hugged me with I returned with one arm.

“Tiffany”, I nodded.

“What are you doing here? are you here for moral support?”, She asked.

“Yeah you could say so”, I sucked my lips in when I felt a familiar arm hooking mine.

“Agent Reid”, Johnny said with a bitter tone. He eyed our arms.

“Doctor”, Reid corrected, his expression wasn’t giving anything away.

“This”, Johnny said gesturing at both of us. “Is low even for you sister.”

“Johnny”, Tiffany cautioned, lightly slapping his arm. “How long have you two been dating?”, She asked. 

“Over a year now”, I said, Spencer just seemed to be trying to kill my brother with his eyes.

“(y/n)?”, I heard another voice, my body tensed up.

“Father”, I sighed when he joined us, standing next to Johnny.

“How have you been?”, he eyed Spencer up and down and then me.

“Fantastic”, I said. “We have been just great”

A smirk crossed Johnny’s mouth, “Your daughter is dating the fed”, he announced. Victor just pursed his lips.

“Well, a little bit more than dating. He is the father of my daughter”, I announced, just in time as one officer started calling everyone to sit down. I walked with Spencer to where Hotch and Rossi sat, through the corner of my eye I could see their surprise, if not pissed expressions.

“How did they take it?”, Rossi whispered.

“I don’t think they quite took it yet”, I said, he took my hand in a warm manner. I sat straight and tried to keep up.

Trials lasted a long time, once the final statements were done and the jury was ushered to the room we stood there, we grabbed a quick bite but were back in the room just waiting to hear anything. I could see my dad sending glances my way. I ignored them, instead listening how Hotch had profiled each one of the members of the jury. There was the possibility of them taking a very long time to reach a conclusion. Spencer had gone out to call Derek and see how things were. I was just about to join him when everyone was called to sit again, they had reached a verdict. Spencer quickly came back, sitting next to the woman Rossi had pointed to be Chief Strauss a couple of rows in front of us. She seemed to whisper something to him.

“Is this a good or a bad thing?”, I whispered at Aaron.

“They took a little over two hours, I will say good. I think proving the point that they are innocent would have taken longer”, He said back. 

I glanced at the two man at the other side, hovering over the three accused man.

The judge started explaining the process, I fidgeted with my fingers as a silent filled the room. A tall woman with a pixie cut stood up. She read something from a paper, as everyone caught their breath. “We the jury”, she started reading, calling the names of the three man. “Found them guilty of all charges.” There was a commotion, A couple of woman crying on the other side of the isle, and some celebration in the side we were seating in. Spencer was pulled by the other FBI members who worked with him in the taskforce. The judge announced when the court will go back in motion, reading some other procedures.

Spencer finally walked to us.

“Congratulations, your investigation was a success”, Aaron shook his hand, Spencer smiled accepting.

I hugged him as soon as he finished the hug that Rossi had pulled him in. He had worked really hard to collect the evidence he needed for this.

“Doctor”, the woman, who I had only seen from afar approached him. “If it wasn’t for your fine work this wouldn’t be possible, the FBI is lucky to have you”, She shook his hand, then nodded my way as she walked back to the crowd.

I saw how the three man were put in handcuffs and walked away, My father following them saying some stuff I couldn’t hear.

“Well that is the closest thing to a compliment Strauss has said”, Rossi chuckled. “Shall we get going?”, he asked. Everyone just nodding as we walked out. 

There were a couple of people who stopped Spencer to thank or congratulate him, I could see a crowd of reporters around some FBI agents, Strauss included.

We walked all the way to the empty parking lot, “So this means you are finally coming back to the BAU?”, Rossi asked, Spencer looked at him and opened his mouth. Then I felt a hand grabbing me by the wrist and pulling me back.

“Hey”, I said, a pain where the fingers were digging in my flesh. I looked up at Johnny.

“You have things to explain to us”, He hissed.

“No I don’t”, I shrugged his hand away as Spencer got closer to us.

“Are you okay?”, He asked, his face tense, I nodded.

“This is nothing to do with you”, Johnny said, his face red.

“She is my girlfriend, so I believe this has something to do with me”, Spencer said, I stopped him before he tried to get closer.

“You are nothing but part of her deranged fantasy. Don’t tell me she didn’t tell you how long she was looking for some stupid guy to fulfill her fairy tale dream? Don’t tell me she didn’t tell you what a whore she was in college.”, Johnny said, with a burlesque tone. I Stood between Spencer and Johnny.

“I think you should stop”, Rossi said walking next to me.

“David Rossi, Why am I not surprised to see you here? Don’t tell me you are on it too? Screwing mother and daughter, this is just something you would do”, He said. Rossi stood closer to him.

“I cannot imagine how disappointed would Donna be if she saw what an excuse of a man you’ve become.”, He spat.

Johnny tensed. “I don’t care what that woman would think, she did everyone a favor by just passing, it was a shame that she had to have her before doing that”, Johnny said, clearly taunting Rossi. 

“Let’s go”, Spencer said, pulling me back, I saw around to make sure no one was looking, Hotch was standing next to Spencer, his eyes dark as he made sure Johnny didn’t do anything. 

“It must be killing you to be with someone like him. And you two have a daughter? Did you actually intent to have her?”, Johnny asked, raising his voice to get my attention, I turned to see him, Rossi had walked back now. Just as he finished. “Or was it too late for you to get rid of her when you found out? I bet she will grow to be a piece of trash just like her mo-”

That’s all I heard, before I felt the pain in my fist. Spencer pulling me away quickly as Johnny hunched with his hand in his face.

“That is enough”, I heard another voice, my dad walked fast towards Johnny, who sucked in air. “From both of you”, He said in a serious manner. I could see him leaning towards his son to inspect him. 

As Spencer pulled me away, He looked pissed. Rossi looked just as pissed and Hotch looked the most serious I have seen him. In the background I could hear my father reprimanding my brother.


	18. Chapter 18

The ride back home was a lot quieter than it had been, and I couldn’t help but feel guilty. We were suppose to be celebrating. Spencer had accomplished something big, yet everyone in the car looked tense. As soon as the car parked in the driveway I muttered a thank you and got off. I opened the front door to see Derek and Penelope walking towards the door, with big smiles on their faces.

Penelope’s smile faded quickly. “Woah Sweetie, are you okay?”, She asked, I just nodded my head. She handed Abby to me carefully I saw Derek’s gaze on my red knuckles.

“Thank you”, I gave them a small smile and walked in, listening as Spencer entered the house. 

I quickly walked to the room, I placed abby in the bed. Shrugging my dress off, I took the robe and put it around my shoulders, without tying it. I took Abby again, sitting in the bed. I pressed her against my skin. Inhaling the smell of her head. I hugged her close to me, she babbled a little as I placed delicate kisses on her head. Spencer walked in a little bit after.

He quietly sat across me in the bed, just a sympathetic smile on his face.

“How are you?”, he finally asked. I saw a small first aid kit on his hand.

“I’m sorry”, I whispered.

“You don’t have any reason to be, what he said to you was deeply wrong.”, He said.

“I’m not using you Spencer”, He cut me off, taking my hand.

“I don’t doubt you, you have never given me any reason to believe that…”, there was something else in his voice, besides the shakiness there was fear.

“What is it?”, I asked.

“I just feel like I could have done more”, He furrowed his eyebrows.

“This is not your fight my love”, he just looked away. “It isn’t, this is something that has been going on for longer than I care to admit. My brother, he kinda blames me for my mom leaving him when he was a kid.”

“It isn’t your fault”, he sounded hurt still.

“I’ve come to that conclusion a long time ago, come here”, I called him closer.

“Has he ever hurt you before?”, He asked, I got quiet. “he has?”

“I’m not a victim Spencer”, I whispered. “I’m okay really”

He scooted until the only thing between us was Abby, who was looking between both of us.

“Me, you and her”, I looked down, Abby was trying to get in her dad’s arms, I gave her to him. “That is all.”, I smiled up at him. He seek my face, making our lips meet. Abby started fussing.

“She is probably hungry”, he said.

Spencer looked down at her, then looked at the first aid kit. He seemed to be debating whether he should give his daughter some food or take care of my wound.

“I know how to bandage, go fix her a bottle before she starts the yelling sesion”, I said, Spencer nodded and walked out with the baby on his arms. 

I cleaned my hands, placing a bandage around my hand when done. It stung a little, I had never punched somebody. I had no idea how much your fist hurt afterwards. I walked out to the kitchen once I was done. I saw Spencer giving Baby her bottle while he hummed at her.

“What do you want for dinner?”, I asked, joining them in the kitchen.

“I can make dinner if you want”, he offered.

“You want to make dinner…”, I asked amusedly.

“Yeah, I read some recipes online that we might like.”

“Babe, reading recipes versus actually making them is a leap”, I tried to tell him before he turned to see me, he looked offended.

“You still don’t trust me in the kitchen do you?”, I bit my lip trying to hide my smile. “I told you I forgot I had the chicken in the oven.”

“The chicken is acceptable, you somehow undercooked rice in a rice cooker”, I chuckled.

He opened his mouth just to close it again, “We can have pad thai delivered”.

“That sounds yummy”, I smiled. 

Abby was now grabbing his tie to get his attention. He looked down at her, taking the almost empty bottle away. 

“Are you full little one?”, He asked, the baby simply babbled at him. I walked towards them extending my arms but she burrowed herself on his chest. 

I narrowed my eyes at her. “Sure, but when I was your source of food you couldn’t get enough of me”, I joked. 

“You are daddy’s little girl aren’t you Abby?”, Spencer smiled hugging his daughter.

I heard my phone ring, muting it as soon as I saw my dad’s name on the screen.

“Why don’t I order the food and you two go pick a movie to watch?”, I asked them, Spencer placed a delicate kiss on my lips before walking away.

I made the call to our favorite restaurant, listening as music filled the living room. I had heard way too many times how classical music helped the brain develop. As soon as I hung up another call came. I locked the phone and placed it on the counter.

Walking into the living room I smiled at the sight. Spencer had Abby laying on her back on a blanket. While he moved a pink and purple giraffe in front of her. The baby moved her limbs happily. Everytime Spencer brought the animal to her belly and blew raspberries at her the kid giggled frantically. I took my shoes off and got into the carpet with them. Spencer was really careful to keep the carpet germ free for the baby to lay in, still she was placed in one of her carpets. He had surprised me when he not once whined about poop, or any body fluids from the baby that got on him. And it had been more than once he had to change his shirt in the morning due to throw up. 

I sat next to him, Abby now looking at me. The kid quickly lost focus, looking around the room.

“Abby”, Spencer called her attention, I swear the kid just seemed to brighten every time she saw her dad. Spencer leaned to place a kiss on her cheek, she smiled.

“Hi pumpkin”, I said, grabbing another of her toys, and playing with her. She seemed to be enjoying the attention right now, just giggling and trying to roll on her back every now and then.

Spencer narrowed his eyes.

“What is it?”, I asked him.

“She is growing too quick”, He pouted.

“Owwe, Abby he wants you to be his little bundle of joy forever”, I said to the kid, pressing my face softly against hers.

“She is always going to be my little bundle of joy”, He said. The kid just reached her arms at him. She got comfortable in his arms a little before she saw Goof on the corner of the room sleeping.

Spencer wasn’t really a fan of Goof just yet, but he was very protective over Abby. He had been great about boundaries too, he didn’t get in the carpeted area or in the nursery at all. 

The kid blew some air through her lips, sending spit all over the place. I laughed as Spencer cleaned her with a little towel he had over his shoulder.

“I think she wants to speak”, he said looking at her. “Most babies say their first syllables at six or seven months, parents think is babbling but the inflection of say syllables show that they are actually trying to communicate. Of course there are cases in which babies start speaking earlier, and that in part depends on the numbers of conversations the parents have with them. The more that the people around them speak the easier it is for them to start finding the meaning of words.”, He said.

“Then she’ll have no problem finding her way through words”, I joked, he shook his head proudly.

“My first word was book”, He said, rubbing Abby’s back, who just sucked on her thumb as she started dozing off.

“Why doesn’t that surprise me?”, I smiled at him, resting my head on the couch. “That is still unusual, mine was probably mommy”.

“Actually one syllable words are fairly common, that includes books, dogs, cats. I said books because my mom used to read me every night, and there was a night she forgot.”, He said softly.

“How is she?”

“She is fine, the doctor says she reacted well to the medicine”, his body tensed. “It is taking a lot of her energy though, so she has been asleep when I’ve called her lately.”

I reached to grab his hand. “Then we should go visit her soon”, I offered, he nodded his head. “Have you thought about what I said? That we should get her over here?”

“I have, I’m just scared she won’t like the institute here in Washington, she is used to her doctors and nurses”.

I just nodded my head as he bit down his lip.

“Have you talked to your dad”, I finally asked, his eyes met the floor.

“No, the Doctor said he had visited mom, and he asked to see Abby’s pictures. Still he stopped calling me”, Spencer sounded hurt, I placed my hand on his thigh.

“Did your mom enjoy the scrapbook?”, I asked, trying to fan out the conversation.

“Oh yeah”, he smiled now. “She says she will keep one like the one she had of me”, He smiled.

“The one with all the pictures of your baby butt?”, I joked, he scrunched up his nose.

I heard a knock on the door and stood up quickly.

“Finally, I’m starving”, I said padding to the front door. I was ready to get the food when I saw who stood on the other side of the door.

“Tiffany?”, I said, looking back inside before stepping out and closing the door carefully. “What are you doing here? How did you know where to find me?”, I looked at her empty car.

“I came alone, I have my ways, believe it or not.”, She gave me an apologetic smile. “Johnny told me what happened, and I wanted to see you were doing okay.”

“Yeah”, I cleared my throat. “I’m doing fine, you didn’t have to come all the way down here”

“I’m sorry I know I’m crossing a line here. It’s just… Well I know how Johnny sometimes says things he doesn’t mean and hurts people.”, She fidgeted with her fingers.

“He knows exactly what he says”, I said defensively, taking her by surprise. She just took a small step back. She wasn’t the enemy, she was just being nice. “Still, thank you for checking on me…”

“You’re welcome, and you told us you have a baby girl so I brought her this, well I don’t know how old she is but I hope she likes it.”, She handed me a small gift bag. “Look, I know you and I are not friends or anything, but I’m happy for you…”

“Thank you Tiffany”, I took the bag from her. After a second she just seemed lost, like she was waiting for something. “Her name is Abigail, she is five months”, I said a smile grew on her face.

“Oh how wonderful. Abigail is a beautiful name”, She said clapping her hands. “I’ve always wanted kids but Johnny, well he isn’t really open to the idea.”

“yeah um…”, I said looking at the door. “Look, to be honest today has been a long day, but if you want I can give you my number and we can arrange for you to meet her? soon”, I said rubbing the back of my neck.

“No need, I took your number from Johnny’s phone”, she said nonchalantly “I would love that though”, She smiled. “Have a good night”, she waved as she walked back to her car. 

“Hey tiffany”, I called her, she turned around. “Can you… preferably…”

“I won’t tell Johnny or Victor a word”, she smiled getting in the car.

Just in time as another car parked behind, this one with a guy bringing me the food. I paid and got back inside. I sighed walking back to the living room.

“Rossi says that tomorrow we are hosting a pizza night, and that is not a question”, He said putting his phone down. “What is that?”, he asked looking at the bag.

“Oh a present for Abby, from Tiffany”, I said casually.

“Your brother’s wife?”, he seemed confused.

“Yeah”, I put the bag aside. “So are we sure we want to let Rossi in our house? you know how he gets about italian cuisine”. I said as a distraction. 

Spencer just laughed shaking his head as he proceeded to tell me about the first time Rossi hosted one of his cooking classes.


	19. Chapter 19

I took my phone, checking it for the first time in the last seven hours. Forty nine calls from my dad, fourteen from my brother. I put my phone down on the counter, grabbing the glass of wine and watching as Morgan finishes loading the dishwasher.

“Again, thank you”, I say, turning to see the team in the backyard. Spencer looked happy, he was wearing a white button up and his red sweater over it. As Penelope told a story his head was slightly pushed back, letting a free laugh escape from his lips.

“So, are you angry at him?, Morgan asked, standing next to me now. I took a sip of wine.

Was I angry at him? When Hotchner raised his glass to toast the return of Reid to the BAU I was shocked. My shockness was noticed by the team and the tension fell on the table. He had explained how he had filed the paperwork two weeks ago. Was I angry because he was coming back? No, the team had promised me that when he did join them on the field they’ll look out for him, and although that isn’t their responsibility it did give me a sense of peace.

“No”, I simply said, pursing my lips. 

“No you are not angry at him for getting his position back?”, he asked again, I shook my head. “Then why?”

“Damn I hate profilers”, I muttered, no bitterness on my tongue though. Derek spun me by the shoulder carefully, looking me in the eyes.

“Baby girl you can tell me you know that right?”, He asked. Yes I knew that, if there is something Derek Morgan was is a good friend.

“I’m not angry at him for accepting the position back. I’m angry because he hid it from me so easily”, I said.

Understandment dawned on his face. 

“Fourteen days, and he did not tell me a word about it.”, I said, crossing my arms and pressing the cold glass against my chin.

“He could’ve been nervous about your reaction…”, He tried to razionalized.

“I know, but he should have pushed against that and tell me. Derek he is way too good at keeping people in the shadows.”, I whispered now, my voice slightly breaking.

He crooked an eyebrow before he looked at him, even if he didn’t say it he agreed with my statement. 

“So you think there are things he hasn’t said to you?”, He asked.

“I think that there will be things he’ll keep from me. To somehow protect me, but I’m not a child Derek, neither am I stupid. I know…”, I took a deep breath. “I knew the moment I started going out with him he would never see me as his equal, and I accepted that. I was okay with that because frankly there are few people as smart as him, or as good as him.”, My mind trailed off. I could see Morgan’s face as he tried to say something. “Out with it, it doesn’t take an FBI agent to know something is bothering you too”, I said.

“Ever since you two are together, you have been head over heels for one another. I’m just… it surprises me to see you like this.”, he confessed, and of course he was scared for his friend. For a second I felt remorse, I was venting to his best friend.

“I love him, I love him more than anything.”, I said, there was no doubt in my mind. “I just think my brother got in my head yesterday”, I tried to chuckle.

“(y/n), I know, trust me I do. You are not dumb, he knows that, he just has a hard head and thinks he can spare you some worries.”

He took the glass from my hands and placed it in the counter, carefully approaching me. Derek pulled me in a hug, and I understood why Penelope wanted to be in his arms forever. The man gave amazing hugs. 

“I;m sorry”, he said.

“What for?”

“Because I cannot give you peace of mind, The only thing I can tell you is that he undoubtedly loves you. You and Abigail have made him happier than I’ve ever seen him.”, He said pulling slightly back. “The whole team has seen it, he now has a reason to go home. That’s all because of you”. 

I gave him a small smile. His hands were on my arms as I looked up at him. He wouldn’t lie right? He had no gain in lying in behalf of Spencer. Well he actually had, all the reasons, but he wouldn’t.

I heard someone clearing his throat. We both turned to see Spencer, he just looked shy as he looked between us. Derek gave me another small hug as he walked out patting his shoulder.

“Should I be worried?”, He asked, his lips twisting as he walked carefully towards me.

I simply shook my head taking my glass back, he took my hand before I could grab it. I looked up at him. He took both of my hands now slouching just a little to see my face. He looked at me expecting me to say something.

“If you don’t want me to go back to the BAU I can always accept the offer of staying with the white collar crimes”, he softly said. “Strauss is assuring me that I will not be in the field as often”.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”, I whispered, his eyes went slightly wide before he took his gaze away from my face. 

“Because I was scared”, he whispered, I seeked his face.

“Of my reaction?”, the words came out bitter from my mouth.

“No…”, He took a deep breath. “I was scared about the reason why I didn’t hesitate to join back…”

“Which is?”.

He took his hands away from me.

“While I was in the taskforce, the team had more than five cases, and… I couldn’t help but feel like I was doing less than them. I know I wasn’t but there was a part of me that felt extremely right about being a profiler.”

“You like to save people”, I said, I was right based on the nod on his head.

“It sounds selfish”, he narrowed his eyes fixed in the floor.

“It isn’t though. Is that really why you didn’t tell me?”

There was panic in his face now as he looked back up at me. He placed his hands on my waist, his long fingers on my back. There was some hurt in my chest as I thought how our bodies completed each other so well. Every part of him fit like a puzzle piece on every part of me.

“Yeah that’s it”, he said. “Please say something.”

There was a pregnant silence. In the backyard I could hear laughter.

“I love you”, were the only words in my mind in that moment.

“I love you too, so much”, he breathed out, his hands quickly on the side of my head. He drew me to him, our lips kissing as his fingers lightly dug in my skull. It was a messy kiss, too messy considering everyone was at earshot, and there were kids in the backyard. Still there was tenderness and need. “I promise you…”

My hand covered his mouth, my thumb then proceeded to clean his lips. I knew the words he wanted to say, and it wasn’t right to let him say them to me. Because no matter how many times he said he would be safe he had no control over that.

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep”, I whispered, his face dropping. “Instead, promise me you’ll love me. Promise me you’ll love me and Abby. That no matters how bad things get you know we’ll be here for you”, I said.

His eyes filled with tears. He brought my face to his chest as he kissed my head.

“I promise you.”, He whispered. I snaked my arms around him, hugging him close.

“Aunt (y/n)”, I heard the little voice say. I pulled back from Spencer quickly catching the kid in my arms. “Uncle Dave said that you needed my help”, He whispered, looking at Spencer.

“Oh and I absolutely do! how else am I supposed to take the pie out? I need the strongest guy in the house!”, I said kissing his cheek. He beamed at my words. 

Spencer smiled looking at us. I walked with Henry in my arms to the place where the pies had been cooling, I put him down, handing him one. I saw Spencer reach for the dessert plates. He placed a kiss on my lips before walking out. I followed them with the other pie.

“Ugh finally! I even pulled back on the pizza for that cherry deliciousness”, Emily said standing up.

William helped Henry place the pie in the table as Aaron called Jack. The kid had been playing fetch with goof, but seemed very ready for dessert.

“You need to give me the recipe for this peach pie”, Penelope took another spoonful as I chuckled.

“Is it okay if I just say that love is the secret ingredient?”, I rested my glass on top of my crossed legs.

“As cute as that is, no, I need actual quantities”, Penelope said. The group just laughed.

“I recognize a good pie when I see one, and this is one”, Will said, Henry had crashed from the sugar and was now sleeping in his arms.

“because you are from the south?”, JJ asked teasingly, he just looked at her as a smile drew on his face.

I looked over at Spencer, his leg bouncing where Abby was happily playing with his fingers. The kid had exhausted both Henry and Jack, apparently no one was a match to the little girl. Yet when she started getting sleepy she refused anyone hold her but her dad. His sweater had been discarded now, hanging in the back of the patio chair.

“This has been a lovely evening”, Aaron said, looking over at Jack who was dropping his head again. “But I think someone is ready to go to bed.”

“I can walk you out”, I offered, standing up.

“Oh no please, stay here”, He gave me a warm smile, I nodded my head. “I will see everyone on Monday.”

“Love you Boss”, Penelope said. He simply rolled his eyes playfully, as he took Jack with him.

“Aaron”, Rossi called, finishing the rest of his drink. “I don’t think I’m fit to drive, could you take me home?”

“David Rossi’s getting old”, Morgan teased.

“For your information, I will most definitely be going out tomorrow, I just need to save my strength”, He said. “I love you all weird kids, have a good night” He said walking out with Aaron. 

“Actually Hotch is right, bedtime for us is long past due.”, JJ said “And I have two boys who look ready for bed”, She signaled at Will and Henry.

Will simply accepted her hand as she stood up.

“Thank you for hosting”, he shook my hand and waved at Spencer.

“Bye guys, love you”, JJ lean in to kiss both of our cheeks.

“Drive safe”, Spencer said. She just nodded as she walked out.

“Well seeming as Party is over, I will kindly accept the invitation of a warm bed”, Morgan said.

“And I will have to agree with my favorite boy”, Penelope said standing up.

“Left room, there are extra blankets on the drawers.”, I said pointing up, I was about to ask if they were sure they wanted to stay in the same room but I knew they would just say yes.

“I’m going to assume I’ll be taking the room in the right, and if it doesn’t bother you I will be taking a piece of this with me”, Emily grabbed another piece of pie after I gestured for her to do it.

“If you guys need anything let us know”, Spencer smiled up at them, he finally had gotten Abby to start sleeping.

“Thank you Mr brains, love you guys”, Penelope waved as she and Morgan made their way upstairs.

“I better not hear funny business”, Emily said walking up with her plate and a glass of fresh wine. She quickly disappeared walking up as well.

I sighed, putting my head on his shoulder. He placed a small kiss on the top of my head.

“Is it bed time for the Reids as well?”, he asked, I nodded.

“Yeah, too much wine”, I whined, he simply chuckled.

“I’ll put her down and then come to help you tidy up?”, He said, carefully getting up.

“No, you go”, I said, starting gathering the plates and glasses.

“Ok, I’ll wait for you in bed”, he said, but I knew he would stay next to Abby’s crib until I dragged him to our room.

I nodded my head, starting my trips to the kitchen, too tired to actually wash anything and just placing them in the dishwasher, once that was full I just put them on the sink.

When I was done I called Goofy in, who happily walked to his bed in our bedroom, I turned the lights off, making sure to take a glass of orange juice and painkillers with me. Self care right? I walked to the nursery, where leaning against the doorframe.

Spencer was singing softly to Abby who was still in his arms. Love definitely made you deaf because to me he sounded good as he sound nonsense. I gave them privacy as I walked to the room. Placing my belongings in my nightstand. I walked to the dresser where I tried to reach the zipper of my dress.

After a second I felt one of his hands on my hip, while the other one slowly dragged the zipper down. His lips meeting my now exposed skin and creating a tingly effect. I let him continue, his kisses trailing all the way to my lower back before he came back up. Moving my curled hair aside.

“Say that you are mine”, He said against the sensible skin of my neck.

“I’m yours”, I sighed, he helped my dress slip off my body as he started sucking on the skin of my neck.

Loving Spencer Reid ached, it ached how much you could love a person. How willing I was to give him every part of my being. And though it ached I loved it, I wouldn’t want it any other way.

“My sweet girl I love you so much”, He said, his fingers playing with the elastic of my underwear.

“I love you too Dr Reid”, I moaned when his teeth dragged against my skin.

His kisses were intoxicating, almost making me forget the reason why he seemed to need me so much. He for a split second thought he could lose me, and I was willing to show him that I wasn’t going anywhere. It was my mission tonight to demonstrate just how much love I felt for him, love to the point of insanity. I turned, meeting his lips, he quickly pulled me up, my legs hooking around him as he walked me to the bed. I needed him to know I was his, in body and soul. And although I had felt insecure before my love for him was stronger. 

He seemed to want to do the same thing. Sweet praises slipping from his lips as his mouth and hands trailed my body. The words drowning me as he told me how much he loved me. I understood then how much he wanted me to feel exactly how I wanted him to feel. And we did. His mouth promising me he would not keep anything from me ever again.

Yet it was a lie, because there were two secrets he was keeping from me as our bodies became one. A harmless little secret in the form of a velvety black box, sitting in the pocket of his sweater that I had forgotten to get inside. Another, a little less harmless, in the form of a phone call made from Spencer’s phone to a Victor Harvey.


	20. Chapter 20

I watched as the people in the waiting room moved around, nurses pushing wheelchairs. A couple of people with luggage walking out. I dangled the toy in front of my six month old daughter as she leaned trying to catch it. My hand on her chest trying to balance her on my leg. I looked up trying to find any sign that Spencer was coming, nothing. I just kept playing with Abby.

I was a little tired, traveling across the country with a baby is tiring, but it was worth it. Diana was going to finally meet her granddaughter, or so we hoped, Spencer had received a call this morning when we woke up in the hotel, saying that she was having a bad morning. We only had two days in the city and I prayed she would get the chance to meet Abby. Spencer had entered the room to see if he could get her to be relaxed enough. That had been over forty minutes ago.

I felt a presence in front of me, as I looked up I saw a man who I did not recognize. 

“is this your baby?”, he gave me a warm smile. I looked around, this place was very secure, but living with Spencer I had learned to be hyper vigilant.

“Yeah…”, I said cautiously, my gripped tightening just a little around her.

“She is beautiful”, He inspected her just enough, before looking at me and smiling again. Okay, I wasn’t getting any weird vibes, and besides only family members could be in the area I was in.

“Do you have family here?”, He asked, sitting next to me, I shifted a little.

“Yeah, My… my mother in law is here”, I said, giving him a polite smile. “You?”

“Yeah, yeah I do”, he looked hurt, I gave him a sympathetic smile as Abby looked at the man sitting next to us.

“How old is she?”, he asked, a smile again on his face.

“Six months”, I said smiling down at her.

“Oh god”, he said sweetly. 

“Her name is Abby”, I told him, bouncing my leg just a little. “Well Abigail”, I corrected.

“What a beautiful name. Abby”, the man called, the kid perked up at the sound of her name. “She is very attentive”

“Yeah, very active.”, I said.

“Is this her first time out of Washington?”, he asked. My body tensed immediately as he realized what he had just said, my free hand traveled to the diaper bag, where Spencer had placed a can of pepper spray, ready to take action if anything happened.

“How did you know we…”

“What are you doing here”, Spencer growled at the man. I, in instinct, stood up hugging Abby close to me as I placed my body next to him. Now that I could see the man from another angle I saw it, it was definitely him.

“Son…”, the man said standing up carefully.

“What are you doing here? How did you know we were here?”, Spencer seemed to be fuming. 

“Spencer…”, I said, as people around us started staring.

“You were the one that startled her yesterday weren’t you?”, He said.

“Son I came to visit her”, He tried to explain, walking closer.

“You can’t, nobody can visit her without my permission”, His jaw clenched. “Who let you in?”.

“Spencer let me speak”, he said, putting his hands up.

“No”, He spat. “I don’t want you close to her”, Spencer leaned to grab the diaper bag as I stood in shock. He grabbed me by the arm as he walked to the desk. After just one step he looked back. “And if it wasn’t clear I do not want you close to my daughter or my girlfriend either.”

I could see the hurt expression of William Reid.

“I’m sorry to bother you”, he sighed, looking at me now. I just nodded apologetically at him. 

Spencer walked to the desk. 

“I need a list of all the nurses who worked yesterday, now”, he demanded, the poor nurse just jumped at his voice and looked back.

“Doctor Reid is everything okay?”, he asked.

As Abby started getting fussy I tried to calm her down.

“No, Can someone explain to me why my mother received a visit from my father without my consent? Or at the very least without me knowing?”, He said bitterly.

“Doctor Reid I can explain”, The doctor said, walking around.

“You better, I want to know who let him in, and I want that person fired immediately.”

“Spencer…”, I said, a little taken aback from his words. This wasn’t him.

“Doctor Reid your mother was the one who requested him.”, The doctor said, his expression now serious.

“She is in no condition to do that, it’s because of him that she is now having a bad day, she was fine all week then suddenly she is not lucid this morning?”, he said same tone as before.

“Please Doctor Reid, just calm down. I completely understand this but your mother had been having a clear week, and she insisted.”, he said rationalizing.

“Spencer”, I said trying to gain his attention, he looked at me. “Maybe she wanted to see him…”, I said softly, he seemed hurt by my words. 

In that moment a Nurse approached us with a smile on her face, clearly not reading the energy.

“Diana is very excited in there, She is good to go now”, she said, her smile fading after finishing the sentence.

Abby was still fussing her noises now turning into soft wailing.

“We’ll be there in a second”, he said, carefully taking the kid from my arms. It had been one of the first thing the doctor said, the baby had to be calm in their interactions. He bounced her a little as she started to calm. 

“I’m sorry”, I apologized, to everyone as I took Spencer to the side. The doctor simply nodded understandably, turning to say something to the nurses.

“Spencer”, I said now, he just shot an angry glance at me. “First of all I did not know it was him, second you need to take it down a notch” 

He looked like he was about to argue before I continued,

“We are here to see your mom, aren’t you the one always hoping that she knows about her autonomy? Well I’m pretty sure she will not appreciate how you reacted”, I said with a serious tone.

He just unclenched his jaw as he continued bouncing Abby, the kid was calm now, possibly just been scared by her dad’s tone from before. He took in a deep breath, breathing out through his mouth.

“Do you want to go in now?”, I asked him, crossing my arms.

“Yes”, he said softly. I took Abby from him, letting him lead the way inside the room.

“Hey mom”, he said, walking in carefully, Diana who was reading a book looked up at him, a wide smile on her face.

“Spencer”, She said, greeting him. It was clear she did not remember the interaction she previously had. 

I walked around Spencer, her eyes landed on the baby on my arms. Her face drop in awe.

“Is this… Is she…?”, She brought one hand to her mouth.

“Mom this is Abby”, he said, with a small smile on his lips. I carefully walked to her. The baby seemed very interested in her grandmother.

“She is so beautiful”, she sobbed, a shaky hand traveling to the baby. Abby giggled when she got close, placing a small hand on her cheek. A tear escaped her eyes. “I cannot believe it”, she said closing her eyes.

I smiled at her, she opened her eyes and looked at me.

“Thank you so much”, she whispered.

“You have nothing to thank me for”, I said softly. “Her name is Abigail Diane”, I smiled at her.

“Oh”, she sighed. “I’m going to sit, I want to hold her.”, She quickly said sitting down on the couch. 

“Here”, I said placing Abby carefully in her lap.

“My grandaughter”, she said, still surprised. “Took you long enough to give me one”, she looked at Spencer, whose eyes were bright watching the scene. The lack of words coming from him said more than anything.

“Is she eating solids?”, She asked looking down at her.

“We started her with some purees but she seems to only like the fruit ones.”, I said, I was kneeling in front of them, sitting in my feet.

“Yeah, He was like that too, only liked the sweet ones”, She said.

“She is such a cute little thing”, She said looking at her. “She looks like you (y/n)”, she said.

“Really?”, I smiled proudly. “Everyone always says she looks like her dad”.

“Well She does have some resemblance to him”, she said inspecting Abby, who seemed very happy with the attention.

After a second Spencer got close. Diana looked up at him.

“You look healthy son”, she smiled. He just knelt on the other side, right in front of me.

“You have been treating my son and my grandaughter right”, she smiled at me.

“I do what I can”, I said tilting my head.

“You have made me a very happy woman by doing so”, she reached for my hand, which I took. She squeezed it lightly.

“I should be thanking you”, I said softly, looking at Spencer. 

He pressed his lips together before putting his hand on top of ours. A smile on his face as he did so.

“So, I asked for all the pictures, did you bring them?”, She said, I proceeded to take out the book with all the professional pictures we had taken of Abby.

We all skimmed through them, laughing at the silly ones and seeing her reactions at the cute ones. We stayed there for about an hour, just telling her the story of the birth and every other story we could think of. Then a very familiar smell came to me as Abby’s face started forming a frown.

“Oh”, I said standing up. “I think somebody did something”, Diana handed me the baby as I took the diaper bag.

“Do you want me to get it?”, Spencer offered, but he was perched at Diana’s side.

“No, it’s fine. I’m also getting some coffee.”, I smiled walking out, giving them the privacy they needed. I headed to the restrooms where I was thankful her dress was intact. Once we were done I walked to one of the Visitor’s lounge to get some coffee. My eyes traveled around the room, noticing William Reid standing by the entrance.

He had stayed all that time there. I walked towards him. My feet almost having a mind of their own.

“Hey”, I said carefully.

“Hey”, he said surprised. “I wanted to apologize for earlier, I shouldn’t have approached you like that”, he said, with sincerity in his voice.

I nodded my head. “How did you recognize me?”, I asked.

“Diana showed me pictures of you guys, she told me you were coming today. She wanted me to come too but I thought I couldn’t interrupt a moment so special for him. Then curiosity got the best of me, I didn’t think he would see me.”, he explained.

“Yeah….”, I bit my lip. The right words not crossing my mind.

“I got her this”, he handed me a small bag. “It was Spencer’s favorite book when he was a baby, his mom read it every night”.

“Thank you”, I said softly, giving him a small smile. 

“She seems like a happy kid”, He pointed at her.

“She is”, I smiled. “She is very active, loves her giggles”, I bounced her a little, making her laugh a bit.

“She looks like Spencer”, he said.

“Everyone says so, well except Diana and Spencer”, I smiled.

“That’s because they look alike as well, she didn’t think he looked like her when he was a baby”, he said, his voice breaking a little.

“Yeah that might be it”, I smiled.

“William”, Spencer said behind me, I closed my eyes accepting my faith. I waited for him to resume his previous fight.

“Son”, William said. “I’m sorry, I wanted to wait for you to come out and apologize.”

“You stayed?”, he seemed surprised, I turned to see him. He had been crying by the red around his eyes.

“Yes. I know there are no words or actions to make amends for what I did to you but…”

“You are right there aren’t”, he cut him off. William just gave him an apologetical smile as he was about to turn around. “But at least you didn’t leave this time, Mom says she wants to see you”, he finished.

William Reid had a smile tuck in the corner of his lips as he nodded.

I looked up at Spencer.

“I’m sorry”, He said, rubbing my arm.

“Don’t be”, I smiled, handing him Abby. “I’ll get myself some coffee, you go spend some time with them”, I said, he didn’t seem to like that idea very much but still walked after his dad.

As I watched them leave my heart sank a little. I poured myself a cup of coffee and walked out. The sun hitting my face. I took my phone out of my purse, my finger hovering over the contact name before I took a deep breath and pressed it.

“Hello”, a voice came from the other side.

“Hi dad”, I whispered.

“(y/n)”, he said surprised. It had been a month and more than a hundred calls later. “I’ve been trying to reach you”, he said.

“I know”, I replied.

“How are you?”

“I’m doing fine”, I looked around.

“I’m glad to hear that… how, how is my granddaughter?”, he asked, the word just seemed wrong coming from him, but I needed to be the biggest person here.

“She is doing good”, I said. “She is six months.”

“Oh wow”, he said. There was a long pause. “I’m glad you guys are doing okay”, he said.

“yeah”, My nail was scrapping my coffee cup as I heard the silence on the other line. I felt my chest tightening “Goodbye dad”, I said, hanging the phone as I heard him trying to say my name. 

I had made a mistake,I should not have called him. If all he wanted is know we were fine then at least I did that. I put the phone back in my pocket, staying out for a little bit more as I finished my drink.

After a while William came out, looking around till his eyes found me.

“I’m leaving now”, he announced.

“A pleasure to meet you Sir”, I smiled politely. He shook my hand walking away, then he turned around.

“I always knew Spencer would grow up to be a much better person than I ever was. He is for sure a better dad than me already. He is lucky to have you.”, he gave me a small smile as he walked away.

I closed my eyes leaning against the wall. I discarded the paper cup walking back inside. I made my way to the room. I knocked on the door before entering.

Spencer put his hand on his pocket quickly, he seemed flustered as Diana gave me a cheeky smile.

I looked between them crooking an eyebrow

“The doctor cleared her to go have some dinner”, he announced happily. 

I smiled at them. 

Diana had chosen a little dinner place, we had stayed till late just talking and stuffing on cheesecake. Once we made it to the hotel we were both mentally and physically exhausted.

I let went to the bathroom changing me and Abby into our pajamas. The kid had a very long exciting day as well. Once we came out Spencer was sitting in bed reading a book he had brought. I crawled into bed with the baby in my arms, positioning myself in front of him. he opened his legs for me so sit in the space between them. I leaned my back against his chest humming contently.

He brought his hand to my belly, I looked up at him.

“Last time we were in Vegas you had a little secret in here”, he smiled.

“Yeah I did, a little secret that’s not so little anymore”, I said, feeding Abby her bottle as she started dozing off. “I don’t have one now if that is what you are asking”, I joked, after a while of him not taking his hand away.

“I know it’s just… I can’t believe we created a life.”, he smiled.

“A very cute one at that”, I replied. “How many do you want to have?”, I said, this is probably a conversation we were probably having fifteen months too late.

“Is ten an excessive number”, he said.

A gasped escaped my mouth. “Unless you are planning on pushing out some of those yeah”, I chuckled. “Seven too many”, I looked at him, his eyes soft as he scanned me.

“Three it is, two girls and a boy”, he concluded.

“I told you you have no control over that”, I rolled my eyes playfully.

“I believe I do, I was right with her”, he said looking at the baby who was now peacefully sleeping.

“That you were Doctor Reid”, I placed a small kiss on his cheek. He smiled.

“I love you future Mrs Reid”, he said, I smiled my heart leaping on my chest.

“I’ve said this before Dr Reid but I see no ring on my finger”, I said playfully.

“You never know, I’m full of surprises”, he wiggled his eyebrows as I pulled a laugh back in the sake of letting Abby sleep.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is called, please google pink Peruvian lilies with pink roses and tell me that is not the most beautiful bouquet.

“You know Rossi, I would be so helpful if you told me what’s going on”, I said, the man, whose arm was hooked around mine, just rolled his eyes.

“You are really impatient aren’t you?”, he said, looking around the park before changing directions.

“Spencer is in on this right? Whatever this is”, I said, David didn’t answer, instead just walking.

It had been a weird Saturday so far, I had woken up to an empty bed. Which immediately startled me awake, I was used to the morning cuddles with Spencer and being deprived of them made me feel uneasy, my fault for being so dependent on him. I didn’t care at this point, I was totally in love with him. What made me feel really uneasy though, was the fact that my daughter was not making a sound. 

Abby, at her ten months of age, was making sure her presence was known at all times. She was an adventurous little girl who kept me and her dad on our toes. We had to quickly baby proof even the things I didn’t think could be baby proofed. The first time she crawled she almost gave me a heart attack, we were in the bed in the morning and Spencer had left to get ready for work, she decided to follow him. That was a thing she liked to do, follow him around. Her eyes just brightened every time he was near. She liked to have me sing to her, but she liked it more when her dad read to her. If at any point I had my doubts it was clear now that she liked to talk as much as him. Still there were things that made definitely made her mine. Like our smiles, who everyone pointed were strikingly similar. We liked to watch Disney movies together, she even seemed to like some songs more than others. She also seemed to be mimicking me most of the time. It wasn’t the first time that while I brushed my hair she brought her little stuffed animal to her hair following the movement. Right now, besides the two of us her favorite person was Emily. Penelope had voiced her feelings of betrayal as Abby crawled towards Emily when we showed the group her new skills.

I sat on the bed my eyes traveling to the small table placed next to the bed. I took the piece of paper quickly.

_ “My Sweet Girl, _

_ Abby and I will go visit aunt Emily. I want you to eat the french toast I made for you. In the bathroom you will find an outfit you are to wear today. Take your time taking a bath, and doing whatever else you need to do. _

_ Yours always, Doctor Reid.” _

I smiled looking at the breakfast on the table, it was slightly warm still. How did he do this without me noticing?

I ate the french toast in bed and after I walked into the bathroom. Around the bathtub he had placed a tray with rose petals, as well as some bath bombs and candles. My eyes traveled to the dress hanging from the door. A beautiful baby blue short dress, sleeveless with a sweetheart neckline. The dress had a silk white belt with a bow on it. I smiled. Next to it was a black coat, which he probably wanted me to use too. 

I smiled foolish as I started running the water. I was about to text him before I found another note next to the bathtub.

_ “By now you probably have seen what I prepared for you. _

_ You have been the most amazing girlfriend and mom these past months.  _

_ You deserve a break more than anyone right now. _

_ So please just relax, no texting or calling me. _

_ We’ll find each other later today.” _

I sighed, bringing the note to my chest. I placed it in the counter where it was safe and I got in the bathtub.

He wasn’t wrong, I needed a break. Even when Spencer always made sure that we split responsibilities having a kid is not easy. I relaxed in the hot water closing my eyes and drifting away for a second. After the water started getting cold I got out. 

I checked my phone, no texts from Spencer, I simply walked to the dresser where I proceeded to do my makeup. I was putting on a pair of high heels that complimented the dress when the bell rang. 

I made my way to the front door.

Rossi looked up and down at me. “You look beautiful, I need your help with something”, he said, I narrowed my eyes. 

This was definitely Spencer’s doing. Rossi was way too quiet, just sending glances my way every couple of minutes, a smile on his face everytime I caught him looking. Then he had parked the car and taken me into the park.

Rossi stopped, his eyes traveling to someone. I looked at the direction and there it was, Spencer was reading a book in a bench. I looked at him suspiciously.

“Go”, he said taking his arm away from mine.

“Ok…”, I said, looking at him questionably. He stopped me, giving me a hug. 

I was even more confused right now, wait where’s Abby? Spencer did not like her to be without at least one of us at all times. I walked towards him, he looked up from his book, he looked terrified.

“Hey”, I said carefully sitting next to him. “How are you?”, I asked.

“You look stunning”, he said smiling, putting his book down and turning my way. He handed me a bouquet of flowers.

“Thank you”, I said bringing the bouquet to my face and relishing in the smell. Pink Peruvian lilies with pink roses, both my favorites.

“You know where we are?”, he asked.

I nodded my head, we were sitting in the same bench I was sitting in that day our non official “first date” when we took the kids to the museum.

“There is something I never told you about that day, Henry didn’t run to you because he spotted you. I saw you and pointed out you were sitting here. I wanted him to want to say hi, I didn’t think he would break away and run to you”, he said with a chuckle.

“Let’s not tell JJ that story”, I giggled, taking his hand on mine. My mind was clouded, what was happening?

“Good idea, but I think about that day, about how I literally ran to you. I ran to our future, to our life. So today I decided to wait instead, to have you take your time as you came to me.”, he said, I could feel his nervousness.

“If I knew where you were I would’ve run to you the moment I woke up”, I tilted my head.

He gave me a closed mouth smile as he checked his watch.

“Somewhere you have to be Doctor Reid?”, I asked.

“Yeah, actually we have tickets for a local production of Hamlet, and I also made dinner reservations”, he said.

“Are you inviting me on a date?”, I beamed. We hadn’t had a real date since Abby was born, and he always made them special. Today he had just gone above and beyond.

“Yeah, well no”, he looked confused, and I just looked at him. He stood up, pulling me up with him. I left my coat and purse on the bench as I stood up. “I am inviting you on a date, but I want you to go on this date as future Mrs Reid”, he said kneeling to the ground.

My heart stopped for a second, I brought my hands to my mouth as I saw him. Was he really…

“The moment I laid eyes on you, I doubted you were real. I wondered how someone so beautiful and sweet could walk the same earth as me? You were a silver line in a very dark world. A drop of honey in a bitter reality. You still are, and this past year you”, he cleared his throat “You have given me more than I ever wanted”, he said softly. My eyes watered.

He did not have to ask me, I knew the answer. Still I was unable to say anything

“I don’t know if I deserve you, but if you let me. If you let me I’ll live the rest of my days trying to make you feel as love as you make me feel. (y/n,y/l/n) Will you marry me?”, he asked.

I nodded my head, but he was still expectantly waiting.

“A million times yes”, I blurted out.

He slipped the ring on my finger carefully before standing up. I launched myself at his arms, not caring at the way we almost tumbled to the ground. There was nothing in the world right now that could take this moment from us. I hugged him by the neck as he happily kissed me, raising me from the ground and spinning with me a little. I kissed him feeling the way my lips couldn’t contain the big smile. 

“Yes”, I repeated as we continued kissing, he put me on the ground again carefully. “You didn’t even have to ask”, I said, drying the tears with the back of my hand. I inspected the ring, tears back in my eyes. “It’s beautiful”, I sobbed.

“Garcia helped me pick it out… I wanted, I wanted it to be perfect just like you.”, He said shyly. I hugged him again. He simply wrapped me with his arms, kissing my head.

I don’t know how long we stayed like that before he spoke.

“We do have plans though, Rossi even bought a box for us to watch the play.”, He said, I just smiled up at him.

The day couldn’t have gone better. I was unable to get myself away from Spencer for a second. Rossi had the right idea when buying a private box because as good as the actors were I couldn’t get myself away from him. He whispered facts about the play every now and then, and I just replied by kissing him each and every time. He quickly picked the pattern up, giving me more facts as the play went on. It took every effort to not crawl in his lap right there and then.

Dinner hadn’t been much different. We sat across each other. Our hands didn’t leave the other’s for a second, to the point that the waitress was suspiciously looking at us by the end of the night. It may had been the giggles that escaped our mouths every now and then. Or the whispers of sweet nothings we spoke through the night.

  
  


“How long have you been planning this for?”, I said, as we walked to Emily’s apartment.

“About five months, I’ve had the ring since the day Abby was born though, I wanted to propose in New Years but then…” He just waved his hand.

“Yeah, you know you could have asked me anywhere at any time, I would have said yes.”

“I know”, he scrunched up his nose. “But I read some surveys, do you know that thirty seven percent of women have been proposed to twice before saying yes? Actually one in every four turns down the proposal.”

“Well that one in every four isn’t marrying Doctor Reid”, I said calling the elevator. “I am. Soon I’ll be Mrs Dr Spencer Reid”, I said happily. Turning to see him. 

When he doors opened he gently pushed me inside, his arms around me as he kissed me. 

“Mrs Reid”, he said, his lips hungry on mine. I dug my fingers in his hair, pulling it lightly as he sighed in my lips. He pressed me against on of the walls, his hand traveling up my leg.

“Ugh you guys”, Emily complained putting her hand in front of Abby’s eyes,We had called her saying we were coming. The grimace in her face disappearing when I pulled away from Spencer and showed my hand. 

“Oh”, she squeaked, giving me a hug. I hugged her back. “Why didn’t you tell me? I thought you wanted me to take care of baby genius so you guys could f-u-c-k”, She spelled it out.

Spencer just scoffed shaking his head. Abby quickly made grabby hands at him. He picked her up.

“Damn that FBI salary really showed up uh?”, she said inspecting my hand. I smiled widely.

“E-mi-ly…”, Spencer warned as Baby started babbling.

“Yeah, baby, sorry”, she said. “Congratulations”, she hugged me again.

“Thank you so much”, I beamed hugging her back.

“I am in charge of the bachelorette party”, She wiggled her eyebrows as she pulled away, hugging Spencer now.

“What does that mean?”, he asked frowning slightly.

“Nothing”, she innocently put her hands up before winking my way. I chuckled under my breath.

“I can keep her through the night if you guys want to have some sexy times?”, she said. “Which I do not want to think about but totally understand.”

“It’s okay”, I said smiling as Abby leaned towards me now. I took her in my arms. “Thank you Em”, I smiled.

“Anytime”, she hugged us both before saying goodbye to Abby and walking back to her apartment.

  
  


The ride back home was filled with Abby babbling, the kid seemed to be monologuing, just making some pauses in between which Spencer happily filled.

“Really”, Spencer gasped, as the baby continued her story. “And what happened next?”

“aba abuyibuba”, she said before giggling.

I shook my head laughing at the conversation they were having. I closed my eyes pressing my head on the window as my daughter and my fiance continued. How can someone be this lucky?


	22. Chapter 22

During the pregnancy Spencer had told me enough about his childhood to have a mental picture of Baby Spencer Reid. He had told me how he was a very quiet kid, which worried his dad. His mom was the one who had to beg him not to take the little baby to another doctor, just for them to say it was too soon for any diagnosis. It wasn’t till later that he started to show the signs of a prodigy. His mom had put everything she had in order to give him all the opportunities he deserved. He stunned even the best of teachers, wowing everyone in his path with his mind, Still, I knew how insecure he could be, and how scare of his own mind he was. I had seen it first hand, when his headaches were too much and he was forced to lay in darkness. I made sure to lay by his side then, surrounded by the silence that contrasted the loudness inside his skull. Spencer Reid had to fight several battles to be the person he was today, growing through life way too quick. His childhood and adolescence cast aside to pursue something much bigger than him. He had joked once about how he felt he grew up trying to catch his mind. I knew about the demons in his brain, the ones that made him overprotective of me and Abby. Even the worst of them the reason why in the worst of his pains he would only take a couple of painkillers and refuse anything else, or why he read so many books on early signs of schizophrenia. 

I on the other hand had a different childhood, one on the other side of the country. I had always been a girly girl. The pink everything, ballet lessons and manner classes kind. I remember very little of my early childhood. Camille, my first nanny, the woman who stayed with me for the first eleven years of my life, always told me how I was an awfully loud baby. She meant it with all the love in her heart though. She used to tell me how I spoke from the moment I woke up to the moment my eyes closed at night. Of course like everything in my past life she was exiled away by my father. I had kept my personality for the next four years I lived in that haunted house, until at age fifteen I left. With a black eye and tears I promised that I would not let myself become one of them. It wasn’t foreign to me how privileged I was though. How I still received private education, and didn’t even have to try hard to get into college. I made it my priority to make sure everyone knew I was still there for my own merits. I studied extra hard to prove myself. I had few friends growing up, with the only constant in my life being the abandonment. Even to this day every cent that my father was obligated to give me was untouched. On my bad days I still yearned on a childhood where i received love from my own blood. Money really couldn’t buy everything.

We had different lives up to the point we met, sure. It was like we lived in two different worlds. Up to the moment faith had made him walk through the doors, that had been the best thing to happen to both of us. Because right now, right now I was looking at the best parts of us. Sitting in front of me on the carpet the baby simply giggled at me, unaware of how much of a miracle she was.

“Mo-mmy”, I said, dragging the syllables hoping that they would catch on her. 

Ten and a half months was early for the first words, but Dr Arya had told us how her constant babbling could signify early linguistic development. Which just meant she might be so eager to speak she would start making sense of her words early. I couldn’t help but notice how happy that had made Spencer, a sigh of relief leaving his lips. I did not mention it, knowing exactly what it had meant. He was happy she wasn’t a quiet baby.

“Mo-mmy”, I said again, I shook my head making my ponytail wiggle, which in turn made Abby giggle again.

“Ma… bababybububty”, Abby said, sticking her tongue out and blowing. I laughed. 

“Yes baby”, I praised her, Spencer had said that constant reassurance was crucial in this stage, it encouraged her to keep trying.

“Mommy Mommy Mommy”, I said quickly, leaning forward and showering her little face with kisses. She laughed happily, even getting some hiccups out of the little human. I separated myself laughing as well. 

“Come on Ab, I know you can baby. Mo-mmy”, I said again. The baby simply ignored me, playing with her stuffed animal instead. 

I let her rest, she had been grumpy all day so even getting her to be relaxed right now was a good sign. I selfishly wanted to think she missed her dad, at least that I could relate to. I layed in the floor, propping myself up with my elbow and with my hand reaching out to pet Goofy, who as always simply kept a close eye on the baby. Spencer had been gone for five days, and it did not matter how supportive I claimed I was I missed him to death. I knew he had to, they had gone to Alaska, the middle of nowhere. Even Penelope had joined them. Thanks to Penelope everyone got satellite phones to communicate. He had been very punctual with his calls, three times a day. One in the morning right after our normal wake up time, one at night right before bed time, and one in the afternoon at the time Abby normally took her nap. That last one was for me, he used it to tell me about the progress, and ask me about my day. The case was one of those rare cold cases that had gained traction the past few days, which made their jobs harder.

This morning though, the call came later. With the good news that he was finally coming home. I had been happy all day, leaving the house to run errands and buy what I needed to make Spencer one of his favorite meals. I tried to tell Abby how her daddy was finally coming back, but everytime the word daddy escaped my mouth she simply looked around expecting to see him. Which in turn made her have a not so pleasant day. 

I sat back up, crossing my leg and tugging my skirt between them. Abby crawled towards me and I placed her in my lap. Giving her a soft kiss in the forehead. The soft Classical music played in the speakers.

“Mo-mmy”, I said, once more.

“Mo….”, She said before she started blowing raspberries.

“Almost there but not quite”, I said in a praising tone. The kid giggled happily. “Why do I have the feeling you’ll say daddy first?” I narrowed my eyes at her.

When her face started wandering around the room I reached for her, making her stand on my legs and started blowing in her chest and belly. The kid laughed uncontrollably, squirming at the tickles. She started hiccuping as my face retreated.

“Laughter induced hiccups”, I heard a voice say, me and Abby both looked up. “At this age babies neves are learning about the world which is why some outburst result in the spasm of the diaphragm causing the hiccups.”, Spencer finished.

Abby and I both chirped up at him, with big smiles in our faces.

“I didn’t hear you come in”, I looked behind them, Penelope and Derek stood smiling. “I didn’t hear you guys come in”, I corrected smiling at them and standing up with Abby.

Spencer placed a chaste kiss in my lips as he took Abby from me. The kid bouncing excitedly in his arms. 

“I’m sorry for invading but the case was an ugly one and I needed to see the little bundle of joy”, Penelope said hugging me.

“And you know I needed to see my Goddaughter”, Derek smiled.

“They invited themselves- ouch”, Spencer said when Derek gave him a small smack on the back of his head. 

I chuckled.

“That’s okay, good thing I made lots of food”, I smiled.

“Hey baby girl”, Derek said hugging me next, I hugged him back. “I got her the Alaska memorabilia”, he said wiggling a little snow globe. Derek had said he wanted to get Abby one from every state. She already had a couple of them tucked away. I smiled taking it.

“How are you guys?”, I asked, I got three expressions of quick grimaces. “Please sit down, I’ll get everyone drinks”, I offered. They both eyed Spencer, who was too busy smelling Abby’s little head and giving her small satisfied kissed in the head. They knew there was no way they would get their turn to pick her up right now.

“wait”, Spencer said, I turned to see him. He pulled me with his available arm and placed a kiss on my lips, a proper one now. “I missed you”, he sighed.

I smiled still close to his face. “I missed you too”, I said, placing another small kiss on his lips as I walked to get everyone some beers.

The case had been officially finished yesterday but they only got clearance to flight in the morning. Bad weather, which was why Spencer hadn’t told me. He did not want to get my hopes up in case the weather didn’t allow them to come home. 

I checked the oven, lowering the temperature as I saw the golden color the chicken had taken already. I checked on the sides too. It was a good thing I always cooked for a small army, normally food would just end up being the next day’s lunch for both. It was one of those things, I was so used to cooking for one since I was fifteen that when Spencer finally entered my life I got carried away. I took my time, seasoning the salad a little more, and popping the covered potatoes back in the oven for them to warm up. 

I walked back to the living room after about fifteen minutes.

“(y/n)”, Spencer said, his hair was pushed back, there was a drop of sweat in his forehead and the pitch on his voice was higher. Add to that the fact that he referred to me by my name, which I knew was stupid but it was normally ‘honey’, or ‘darling’, or ‘sweetie’. 

“What…”, I asked confused, as I looked at Penelope and Derek both hovering over Abby who was in the floor with her hand in her mouth. 

Spencer tried to cover my sight with his body, but I pressed a beer in his chest for him to take before walking towards them.

“Hey”, Garcia looked at me wide eyed like a deer caught in the headlights.

“What’s going on?”, I looked around the room. To the faces of nervousness. 

“(y/n) I can…”, Spencer said walking towards me carefully. 

Abby crawled towards him now, tucking on his pants.

“Daddy”, the kid giggled, the word was babbled but somehow clear.

My jaw dropped as I quickly handed Derek the drinks, in an effort for them to not end up in the floor.

“Abby did you just?”, I knelt on the carpet, the kid oblivious of her own achievement. I swiftly got her in my arms. I started kissing her cheek. “Oh my God Spencer she just…”

When I looked up and saw the horror planted on everyone’s faces in dawned on me.

“She said it before didn’t she?”, I said accusatory.

“I’m so sorry I know you have been trying to get her to say mommy but if I am being completely honest it was Morgan’s fault”, Spencer said quickly.

Morgan just looked betrayed as his jaw hung.

“It’s true he started prompting her to say it”, Penelope added quickly. Derek just sent a glance at her and she pressed her lips shut.

A hearty laugh escaped my lips, as I hugged Abby close to me. Spencer knelt in front of me, a timid smile on his mouth.

“She said her first word”, he said, now letting his fear wash away.

“I thought she had bump her head or something”, I said, because the first time she bumped her head with the control remote she had gotten her hands on, I had the same reaction. 

“That kid is a genius already”, Garcia said happily.

Spencer hugged us both. We then put ourselves together standing up.

“I’m so proud of you baby”, Spencer said. “You are such a smart little pumpkin”, he placed a kiss on her cheek

The baby smiled widely at that, her eyes traveling around the room.

“De-rek”, Derek said when Abby’s eyes landed on him.

“Oh no, no no no, next word that comes out of her mouth will be mommy.”, I laughed.

“Or Penny, she can say aunt Penny”, Penelope said smiling.


	23. Chapter 23

“Spencer!”, I called again, knocking the door. “I know you are ready just come out”, no response, “Aaron is coming to pick you up at any minute now.”

I rearranged the blue bow on my pony tail, brushing the hairs in my head. I eyed the baby in the green dress who was playing on the mesh playpen.

“Ok Spencer I’m coming in”, I announced before opening the door. My lips immediately sucked in my mouth at what my eyes were seeing. 

Spencer, dressed all in green, with high boots. What really made the look was the green pointy hat with the red feather. 

“You look adorable”, I smiled at him.

“You don’t need to lie”, he pouted, crossing his arms and sitting on the edge of the bathtub. “You do look adorable”, he added.

“You do Peter”, I joked, he just pushed his bottom lip out even more. “You know Peter Pan was like a big crush of mine when I was a kid, besides don’t you love Halloween?”, I asked, getting closer to him.

“Yes, but traditionally Halloween costumes are modeled after supernatural figures. It is widely believed that in the early nineteenth century by dressing up as creatures associated with fear people poked fun at Satan, although the dressing up part seems to have originated just as a kid’s game.”, He said, letting his arms fall as he started getting comfortable with the facts.

“Well, too bad that we are dressed up as Disney figures champ”, I snickered.

It was kind of his fault he was dressed like that, the day we had planned on going costume shopping he had been called for a case last minute. Leaving me in a big warehouse turned Halloween store, and a heart full of love for Disney characters. Well it wasn’t his fault, it was the serial killer in Texas who apparently did not care one bit about my plans. 

“I look ridiculous”, he said, I knew if he was completely opposed to the idea he would not have dressed up. 

Time to pull out the big guns. “You can stay here then, but then you will not find out what Wendy has under her dress”, I said the last part as flirtatious as I could, putting my hands behind me. I was going as Wendy, of course, a collared blue dress that ended right on my knee, white stockings and black short heels. It was what was underneath that had me excited, Spencer had been gone for his birthday too so I had to improvise his make up gift.

That seemed to get a reaction out of him, I was close enough for him to just reach his hand. Hovering in the skirt he looked up at me, I just shot him an approving glance as he started pulling the skirt up, standing up with the movement. I could see his Adam’s apple traveling in his throat, his eyes getting a little darker as he saw me. The white stockings ended on a lace pattern mid thigh. They were attached by suspenders to a teddy bodysuit, the same tone of blue as the dress. He pulled me closer to him, I could already feel his excitement.

“And you are torturing me because…?”. he asked, lowly in my ear.

“I am not torturing you Doctor Reid, I simply thought you would like to take a look”, I said coyly, just fanning my eyelashes to him. When he was about to put his hand on my butt I took it, clicking my tongue. “I’ve told you before about self control haven’t I?”

He just looked at me with a serious dark expression in his face, but as he was about to say something a cry came from the other room. I quickly pulled my dress down walking to the bedroom where Abby had thrown one of her toys out of the playpen and was wailing at it.

“Oh come here little baby”, I cooed as I picked her up. “There there”, I dried her tears placing a kiss on her nose. Goof had entered the room, as he always did when Abby cried. He of course had a nursemaid hat on his head, just like Nana did on the movie. 

“Everything okay?”, Spencer asked, a raspiness on his voice. It was clear he had to take time to compose himself.

“Daddy”, the kid wailed again, leaning forward in the air, her arms out for her dad to pick her instead. 

“Got you”, he said picking her up carefully and placing her in his hip. 

I smiled at them. “Peter Pan and his Tinkerbell”, I said excitedly, picking up the little fairy wings and attaching them to the velcro of her dress. Spencer fixed the front of her little green dress. “I need to take a picture”, I picked my phone up taking several pictures. 

Spencer was now smiling, probably realizing just how cute this actually was. 

“You know”, I inspected the pictures, “If this FBI thing flops you could totally play Peter Pan at one of the Disney parks”, I joked.

“Very funny Mrs Reid”, he said sarcastically, still he used what had become his favorite name for me. I smiled leaning in to give him a kiss before the doorbell rang. 

Spencer closed his eyes probably understanding that actual people were going to see him. I gave him a small kiss before walking to the door and opening it.

“Trick or Treat!”, the two kids said in unison,

“What do we have here? Are this Iron Man and Spider Man?”, I smiled, as both of them nodded their heads. I grabbed the bowl in the table and waited for them to open their bags to drop two handfuls on each one.

“That will help them Sleep”, Aaron said with a smile.

“Thank you”, they said, launching to me to give me a hug. I crouched a little to hug them back. 

“And you are….” I said, trying to make sense of his costume, the hat… the coat… 

He placed the old pipe on his lips.

“Sherlock”, I nodded. “And Cowboy?” I looked at Will.

“Woody, you’ll have to see Jen to get it”, he said smiling. “How are you…”, he asked looking at my costume.

“Oh!”, I said excitedly. “Spencer come here”, I called him. I waited a little bit before he stood next to me.

“Oh that’s adorable”, Aaron said smiling. 

“Wendy”, Will concluded, I nodded my head.

“Abby”, Jack said excitedly, as the kid reached for him. Henry joined them as Abby laughed putting her hands on Jack’s Iron Man mask. Henry took his mask off letting his hair a mess.

“Hey boys”, Spencer smiled at them.

“Uncle Spencer are you Peter Pan?”, Jack asked, slightly confused.

“I am”, he said, sending me a look.

“Ok, I think you gentlemen should get going.”, I said. “I’ll be right behind you, if you need anything”, I looked at Spencer.

“Don’t worry, I got this”, He said confidently.

“I don’t think we’ll be out for long”, Will said giving me a reassuring smile.

“Okay”, I turned to see him, giving him a small kiss on his cheek as I grabbed the bucket of candy and placed it out.

“Is this a good idea?”, Aaron asked.

“If it ends up being stolen, at least I hope they enjoy it”, I joked. I grabbed the diaper bag and the keys, making sure to close the door as everyone stepped on the driveway.

The dads were taking the kids trick or treating while the rest of us were meeting at Rossi’s house for a little Halloween Party. It had been Penelope’s idea to take the kids trick or treating in his neighborhood because ‘they have money, they will totally give them full size snickers’. Spencer had decided to take Abby in her very first Halloween, even if she wouldn’t remember we could tell her about it. Once they all got in the SUV I entered my own car. 

“Hello”, Rossi opened the door, his voice trying to make a spooky tone.

“Count Dracula hello”, I smiled at him. He hugged me quickly before moving for me to enter.

“You are..”, he said inspecting me.

“Until Spencer and Abby come back it will not make sense”, I rolled my eyes just flashing the picture that was now my lock screen. Rossi chuckled.

“You got that man whipped”, he said, guiding me to the living room.

“Hi!”, JJ said excitedly, she was dressed as bee bop from Toy Story, of course since Will was Woody.

“You look so good!”, I said hugging her. 

“So do you, Wendy”, she smiled. She was the only one who knew about the costumes beforehand.

“(y/n)”, Penelope waved from the couch where Derek and her were sitting. I walked towards them,

Penelope had a very short wig on… the plaid suit…

“Doctor Who?”, I asked, she nodded her head excitedly. 

“Hey baby girl”, Derek smiled up behind his aviator glasses.

“Maverick?”, I asked.

“You know it”, He said. When they both looked at me I simply showed them the picture.

“You are telling me Spencer Reid will walk in here dressed as Peter Pan?”, Derek said amusedly.

“Abby looks adorable!”, Penélope pouted.

“Oh let me see!”, Emily, dressed as catwoman entered the room followed by a man I didn’t recognized dressed as Batman. I showed her the picture.

“She is so precious!”, She said. “(y/n), this is Clyde Easter”, she said pointing at the man. “An old friend”

“Hi nice to meet you”, I offered my hand.

“Very nice to meet you too”, he said in a heavy british accent while shaking my hand.

The next hour was filled by lots of laughter as everyone shared anecdotes about past Halloweens. When my glass was empty I walked to the side where the bar was.

“Hey Kiddo”, Rossi smiled. “Let me help you”, he said, starting to mix another drink for me.

“Thank you”, I smiled. “It’s clear I will not be designated driver today”, I chuckled.

“There’s always extra rooms here”, he offered.

“Abby is in this wake up at five AM and scream bloody murder phase. I love you too much to do that”, I joked. He simply scrunched his nose finishing the green drink. I could see his eyes on me.

“You know living with a profiler has its benefits, out with it”, I said sipping from the glass.

“Your dad’s birthday is coming up”, he said. I nodded I knew what he actually wanted to say.

“Yeah I… well”, I just shrugged my shoulders. “I’m glad I met you, I have gotten to know her better through you than from anyone else.”

He gave me a sympathetic smile.

“What a cruel joke for her to die the day of his birthday uh?”, I said. He nodded and we both drank.

“I take flowers to her every year…”, he said. I felt a little pain in my gut. I had only gone to visit her a couple of times. Another drink from both of us.

“He invited to a dinner for his birthday, he says he wants to meet Abby and get to know Spencer”, I said after a second.

“Are you going?”

“Maybe, I don’t know. I want to talk with him first, see if he has anything to say”, I said and he nodded. 

“(y/n) come on! you totally need to tell us that story on how you ended up in new jersey after Halloween”, Derek said, I shook my head walking back to the group. 

“That’s the night I swore off Absinthe”, Derek finished his story with a grimace.

“Are you sure because I remember a day in which I clearly saw you…”, Spencer said. They had gotten back about two hours ago.

Derek threw a cushion at him, which landed on his face before hitting the floor.

Everyone simply laughed.

“Mr Eidetic Memory”, Derek said mockingly. Spencer smiled proudly bringing the candy bar to his mouth.

Abby who was too busy with Jack and Henry was now crawling towards me, her face in a slight frown.

“Mommy”, she cried when I picked her up. This was her ‘I’m done for the day’ signal.

“Someone is ready to go home”, Spencer said looking at her.

“I know. Thank you guys for the good time but if Miss Ab doesn’t get to bed soon I will pay tomorrow”, I said, everyone just agreed and started with the goodbyes.

“My dad invited us to his birthday party”, I told Spencer, we were making the turn before getting home.

“He did?”, he asked parking the car in the driveway.

“yeah, I think we should go”. He turned to see me, before giving me a single nod from his head. 

I gave him a small smile before getting out of the car. He quickly got the sleeping girl out of the seat and walked to the door.

“Do you want me to get her?”, I asked.

“No, I got it, you sweet girl go sit in the bed for me”, he said as we both walked in the room.

“I thought you had forgotten”, I tried to hide my smile.

“I have not”, he said. “Come here boy”, He called goofy, who had been following us the moment we stepped on the room. We had placed a dog bed in the nursery for him, although he did not sleep over night there I guess tonight was convenient for him to stay.

I walked to the bed, shrugging my dress up and sitting in the bed. I took time going through my phone as I knew the night routine. Before I heard the door close behind him, his eyes traveling up my body. I was sitting against the headboard. One leg extended and the other one crossed over it with my foot flat on the bed.

He did not say anything as his shirt was shrugged and thrown in the floor, he kicked his boot off. His eyes not leaving my body for a second as he climbed in the bed. Positioning himself right in front of me he took my foot and unwrapped my legs. I looked at him as he brought one leg up to his face, his nose running through the side of it to the inner thigh, where I could feel the hotness of his breath in my exposed skin. 

“Tell me what you want sweet girl”, he prompted.

“I want you Doctor Reid”, I sighed, moaning as his kisses started traveling up.


	24. Chapter 24

I stood a couple of feet away, feeling like an intruder. As the man in front of me bent over and placed the bouquet of white Peruvian Lilies on the stone. He stood there for a second before walking towards me again, we both sat on the bench that was placed right in front. He reached for the bottle next to him on the ground and filled both of the glasses in my hand halfway.

“I loved her”, he confessed, his voice low and steady. “I just wish I told her before. I know everyone jokes about my marriages but I did love every single woman who I’ve been with, they have made me who I am today.”, He sipped from his drink sighing. “Your mom was one of them.”

I looked over at him, words not being enough to tell him what I wanted. Because there were no words, yet I reached for his hand his fingers intertwined with mine.

“I’m sure she loved you too”, I said. 

He looked at me with a tight smile. I fought for the tears to come out but somehow it was physically impossible. He squeezed my hand as tears pooled in his eyes. Although I pushed the thoughts away I couldn’t help but feel like a monster, what kind of person doesn’t cry for their own mother?

“I”, I said, letting go of his hand, “I went through her stuff, she was very careful to leave everything organized before she…”, I said trailing off, taking out an envelope. “This pictures, I found them and I thought they belonged to you”.

I handed him the slightly yellow photograph. He looked them over, a quiet sob on his body.

“This is the first date we had, I took her to the theater”, he said showing me a picture.

In it, a young Rossi stood next to a woman, a woman strikingly similar to me. A laugh on her face as the man had his arm around her. 

“I have that dress”, I whispered with a smile. It was a vintage off the shoulder light green dress, with a white belt. 

“I bet it looks as beautiful in you as it did in her”, he said, running his finger through the picture.

“I also noticed, she is wearing a locket that I couldn’t find. Until I dug deeper.”, I said taking a little red velvety box with two letters in gold. “DR, that’s you right.”

His eyes watered again as he took it carefully. He opened the box, a small round gold locket inside.

“I gave this to her”, his voice was shaky. “That same day, I… confessed my love for her.”, he whispered. “She told me I deserve something better, and not even a month after she was already seeing Victor. We had an argument because I told her she deserves someone better as well. I stormed off, and I didn’t see her again for another four years. By that time Johnny had been born, everyday I wish I had actually taken the time we had left.” He said softly. “I wish I hadn’t wasted time arguing with her, the precious little time we had left.”

“There was no way you could have known, she… she didn’t want anyone to know”, I said swallowing. My mother had not told anyone about her cancer, deciding instead to prepare everything and leave everything in order. Which is why my brother hated me, he believed that she did it to protect me, so I would not have to remember my mom at her worst. The thing that tore my heart is that he might be right.

“She kept this very well hidden”, I told him. What could I say to make this be better? Would anyone want to hear that someone they loved and lost loved them back. “It belongs to you”

“I- thank you”, he whispered taking his drink again, I did the same.

“She would be so happy for you (y/n)”, He said. I gave him a small smile. 

“She would be happy I found you”, I said, we both sipped our drinks again.

“Are you going to see him tonight?”, he asked after a moment of silence, I nodded my head.

“What am about to say, will sound horrible”,I said. “I wish that DNA test came back negative, or that it was never taken. At least then… At least then I would have some hope”, I looked at him, his face seem to fall at that, a tear running through his cheek. He left the drink aside, pulling me into a tight hug.

“We do not need to be related for me to love you kiddo”, he said kissing my head.

We stayed there for a long time, words not being enough. Silence simply enveloping us like a soft blanket as the words left unsaid tingled between us. 

“I made several mistakes with my own blood, I would not let me ruin this”, he whispered.

I smiled at him when we separated, Me offering him a handkerchief that I had on my purse, he accepted as we both turned to see the old grave on the ground. The winter air whistling and messing our hair. 

  
  
  
  


I arrived home about an hour later. I placed a hand behind my neck and crooked my neck to let some tension out. It was barely noon and I felt like I’ve been awake for a week. The house was quiet, They were probably taking a nap. I walked to Spencer’s office. Kneeling on the ground I opened one of the lower cabinets, pulling a moving box. I fumbled a little before finding a white frame the right size. I carefully placed the picture Rossi had giving me. The one with him and my mom on a date. I smiled as I put everything back in the box. As I tried to push it back in something seemed to be jammed behind it. I shoved my arm as I pulled a manila folder, papers falling in the ground. I quickly collected them,reading them to put them back in order. This were transfers papers, from the FBI. My eyes narrowed as I looked them over.

“I thought I heard you”, I jumped a little bit, as the man entered the room, his face groggy and his hand running through his face. “What are you doing?”, he asked confusedly. 

“Are these transfer papers?”, I asked, standing up with them on my hand.

“Where did you get those from?”, he said in a defensive tone.

“Spencer these are dated March from last year”, My voice was a little lower than what I intended.

“I had received an offer from an anti fraud unit in New York”, he explained, his arms crossing in front of his body.

“These are dated March from last year…”, I repeated once it was clear he was avoiding the question. “They are filled… were you?”, I asked.

Was he going to leave me? Was the only reason he didn’t because I got pregnant. My could feel the knot on my stomach.

“NO!”, he said quickly walking towards me, I took a step back. “I filled them because Strauss told me I should, I promise I wasn’t…” He ran his hands through his hair, which was a little longer than usual, almost to his shoulders. “If it panned out I would’ve taken you with me, and if you said no I would’ve stayed here. And then, and then”

And then Abby happened. I thought I bit my lower lip avoiding the way I could hear my heartbeat.

“Did she stop your plans?”, I asked.

“No”, he simply said, but his eyes avoided mine. I could almost see the way the barrier built around him, his lips pursed and his shoulders slightly raise. “She is taking her nap”, he said clearly changing subjects.

I wanted to tell him, why couldn’t I? Why couldn’t I say anything right now?

I simply nodded, dropping the papers in his desk and taking the picture with me. I walked into the nursery where Abby laid peacefully. I sighed, standing next to the crib. My mind unable to process a thought. She was the best thing to happen, to both of us. Right?

Spencer cleared his throat, entering the nursery but staying in the door. “I will go get a haircut”, he said, pointing out. “I’ll take goofy with me, that way he can get some exercise.”

“That’s okay”, I said softly. He looked at me, his body like he wanted to walk towards me. He simply nodded getting out of my line of vision. I sat for a while looking at her.

Spencer got home about three hours later, by that time Abby and I layed on the bed, watching as Simba sang a song. The baby bounced on the bed excitedly, a giggle escaping her lips.

“Hey”, Spencer gave me a small smile as he entered the room.

“You look good”, I said. His hair was shorter than the normal haircut he got, faded in the back but his curls remained in the front.

“I told him just the edges but he convinced me”, he chuckled. 

It was clear we were not having the argument. Abby crawled on the bed, looking confusedly at the man.

“Hi”, he laughed crouching to see her. She inspecting him a little before smiling widely. “Oh so you approve”, he picked her up.

“Daddy og”, she said pointing at the tv. Og was what she called Goofy, and what she called any animal that could be a dog.

“That’s a lion baby, can you say lion?”, he said, walking towards the bed and sitting next to me. If he noticed the way my body slightly shifted away from him he did not say anything. “Lion”, he tried. “A lion goes aghhh”, he said roaring lightly. Making the baby explode in laughter. He roared again.

This time Abby imitated the sound, or tried to. I smiled looking at them.

“I’ll take a shower, Abby already had hers”, I said, Spencer nodded with a smile as he and Abby continued the movie.

I took my time in the shower, and then curling my hair when I got out. I walked towards the closet, pulling one of the dresses in the back, a black fabric bag around it. I pulled it out and put it on. The dress my mom was wearing in the picture. I walked into the bedroom when I was all done. Seeing the image in front of me. Spencer was laying in the bed with a book on his hand. The other arm was around Abby as she quietly sucked her thumb with her head on his chest. 

“What do you say we let daddy get ready while we put you in something nice?”, I said approaching them, Spencer looked at me.

“Wow (y/n) you look really nice”, He said. I smiled at him.

“Thank you”, I said leaning forward to grab Abby, the girl let me pick her up for once. It was Spencer who placed his hand on my arm.

“I love you”, he said, in a way that made my heart hurt. I knew that right?

“I love you”, I echoed the words, a small smile tucked on his lip as he sat up once the baby was fully in my arms. I walked into the nursery where I started changing Abby into her own dress. 

  
  


By the time we made it to the front door we were fifteen minutes late. I did not care, actually I wished I wasn’t here. Because as soon as we walked up the stairs to the door I remembered the numerous times I ran down those stairs with tears in my eyes. The weight setting on my shoulders to accompany everything else that the day had thrown at me.

“Ready?”, Spencer asked, I nodded my head as he rang the doorbell. One last deep breath before someone opened the door.

“Ms (y/l/n)”, Joseph said, Joseph was the Majordomo, and right hand man of my dad. Because of course Victor Harvey had someone like that. “It’s so nice to see you here”, he added.

I gave him a polite smile. “Joseph these are Doctor Reid, my fiance, and Abigail, my daughter.” He seemed surprised by my words.

“Nice to meet you”, he nodded as we heard footsteps approaching us.

“We’ve been waiting for you, you are late”, My father said, matter of factly.

“Traffic”, I lied. He looked at me up and down, clearly recognizing the dress.

“Doctor Reid”, he nodded.

“Mr Harvey”, Spencer said in the same tone.

“Is this…?”, he said, walking in closer to us, inspecting the little girl who was burrowing herself in Spencer’s suit.

“Dad this is Abigail”, I said, extending my arms for her to take, she simply shook her head looking at her dad. He moved a little so the girl could see him. 

A smile appeared on his face. “She is beautiful”, he said, I nodded my head. 

Joseph probably palping the awkwardness of the situation pointed out that dinner was ready, and guided us to the Dining room.

“I got her a high chair”, He said pointing at the chair that was placed between two others. 

Spencer walked and placed her in it. She seemed to not want to be there as she complained.

“Wow”, Alissa, one of the maids said smiling widely, I had known her in the last years I lived here. She was the one who would put a tray of food in front of my doors the days I could not sit next to the two man. I smiled back at her, a genuine smile.

“She is so precious”, she whispered.

“Thank you”, I said.

Johnny walked in, Tiffany around his arms. And I saw another woman, who walked towards my father. She quickly hooked her arm around his. This woman could very well be my sister.

“Victor is this your daughter?”. she smiled at me.

“Hey sis”, Johnny said giving me a smile. 

“Hello”, I said.

“I see you bought your… boyfriend”, he said looking Spencer up and down. Spencer simply stood closer to me, his body language screaming protective. Still for respect he simply greeted everyone.

“Oh she's getting cuter by the day”, Tiffany said looking at Abby who was now busy with the plastic sippy cup in front of her. I saw as Johnny eyed the baby. “Hi Doctor Reid”, she smiled up at Spencer. Who relaxed a little.

“Hello Tiffany”, he greeted.

“Your dad talks about you all the time”, The woman next to my father said to me, everyone looked at her weird. Because it was the most blatant lie she could ever tell. 

“(y/n), this is Hannah my girlfriend”, My dad said, I nodded towards her. “This is my daughter (y/n), and her fiance, Spencer Reid”, he said pointing at him, he extended his hand towards the blonde who seemed about ready to undress him with his eyes. 

“Shall we?”, Johnny said with a fake excitement as he pulled a chair for Tiffany.

Spencer did the same for me as we all sat on the table.

Wait, how did my dad know Spencer was my Fiance…?

I eyed Spencer who was tense again, he couldn’t have right?

The first course, the salad. Went well, everyone simply talking about normal stuff, work stuff. A couple of questions about Abby and about life. Of course the not so pleasant comments from my not so pleasant brother. There was a very weird question from my father, asking whose last name Abby had.

By the time we were halfway done with the quail things starting getting tense.

“I’m just saying, the FBI must keep you away for a long time. It must make you happy my sister is predisposed to being a trophy wife”, Johnny said, taking a bite of his food.

“That’s enough”, My dad said cautiously.

“I try to help her as much as I can at home”, Spencer simply said. 

“Why? is housekeeper a job way too hard for you sis? I remember just how much you liked things being handed to you”, I put my hand in Spencer thigh as he was ready to say something.

“Very audacious for you to say that bro”, I said, washing down my last bite with wine. “Because you are still living here right? And you are still working in the firm?”

I smiled behind my glass as the crimson color settled in his ears.

“That’s enough”, my dad said again. This time he put a hand up and signaled for the maids to pick everything up. Abby started getting uncomfortable again as I turned and saw her.

“Alissa, can you take my granddaughter to the living room”, He ordered. I looked at him confusedly. “I just want to have a talk with you”, he reassured me.

“Don’t worry”, Alissa said with a warm smile to Spencer, I nodded my head as she took her away.

“Tiffany, Hanna”, he raised an eyebrow. Both woman stood up and excused themselves out.

“What is happening?”, I asked confusedly.

I saw as the plates were taken away from the table, being cleaned in less than a minute. Joseph re entered the room, handed my father a folder.

Once everyone was out. Except Johnny, My dad, Joseph, Spencer, and I. He slid the folder towards me.

“Abby’s trust”, he explained, I frowned slightly.

“I don’t want her to have one”, I said.

“Come on sis, you don’t?”, Johnny asked sarcastically, my dad shot him a look and he shrugged his shoulders. 

“Johnny and Tiffany found out recently she is unable to bear a child”, He said.

My eyes narrowed. I felt really bad for her, even worse because she wasn’t even present for this very personal talk.

“I’m sorry”, I said sincerely. I took the folder. What did this have to do with Abby? I opened it, the trust looked just like the one I had, there were more papers, which made me hand it to Spencer. He was a lot faster reading anyway.

“What does this have to do with us?”, I asked suspiciously.

“they are naming her next of kin”, Spencer breathed out. His eyes traveling on the papers. “This is the firm’s hierarchy line.”

Then realization washed over me.

“You are making her you heir?”, I looked at Johnny.

“I wish I didn’t have to, but a dynasty is a dynasty”, he said bitterly.

“You know there are other ways to have kids”, this small part of me still felt for Tiffany. I couldn’t imagine what she had felt. It was implied that Johnny had wanted her to have his kids, if anything to ensure his legacy. Which was messed up in a thousand different ways.

“I know, but until then and in case anything happens to us it falls on her.”

“She is a baby”, I looked at them, my veins boiling with rage. It all made sense now. “Is that why you’ve been calling every day?”, I looked at my dad.

“I can explain….”

“You want to change her last name?”, Spencer spat putting the folder down on the table. His jaw clenched.

“Are you two delusional?”, I asked. “Are you trying to use my daughter to secure your fuckiong last name? Are you shitting me?”, I shouted.

“She can have all the opportunities in the world. The ones you had, and the ones you didn’t have”, My father said calmly.

“What opportunities dad? Tell me, which ones, the ones in which I was only useful when your pervert friends needed some eye candy? Or when you needed me to stand by your side as a way for the press to sympathize with you?”

“This is bullshit”, Spencer threw the folder in front of Johnny.

“Very brave for you to say something Doctor Reid”, My brother salty laughed.

I looked at Spencer confused.

“What? didn’t your little boyfriend tell you he called dad before proposing to you? Look I don’t know how that conversation went but it had to be enough for my dad to try and get her back”, my brother leaned in the table.

“That is not what happened”, My dad said looking between us.

I could feel the room spin around me.

“My daughter is not a chess piece”, I said in the most monotone voice I could. Standing up and throwing the fabric napkin in the table. I stood up and walked to the living room. My feet having a life on its own.

Tiffany looked at me apologetically, probably knowing exactly what the conversation was. 

Alissa’s smile to Abby faded when she saw my probably pale face. 

“We are going home”, I said leaning to grab Abby, thankfully the baby reached her arms up at me.

“Mommy”, she said excitedly, my heart breaking to pieces.

“(y/n)!”, Spencer ran into the living room.

I walked past him to the front door.

“(y/n) please”, his voice was desperate as he followed me.

“We can explain”, Victor said. “He only called to ask for my blessing”, he said, there was a hint of hurt in is voice. I clenched my jaw looking as Johnny smiled widely leaning against the wall.

“I knew it was a mistake coming in here”, I said, exiting once I had Abby wrapped about my own coat. Spencer followed me.

“(y/n) please talk to me”, Spencer said behind me as I put Abby in the baby seat. I entered the driving side slamming the door. He entered the passenger side. “I promise you I had no idea”, he said. I put the music on and started driving, trying to shut any and every noise away. 

Why was everything so loud? Why did everything hurt? Why couldn’t I shed a tear?

My eyes on the road drowning the attempts of Spencer to talk to me as I drove home. My stomach a knot and my heart aching. Why did this happen to me?

Once I parked Spencer was quick to get Abby out of the seat. I walked in the house directly to the bedroom. I needed quiet, Abby had fallen asleep on the car so she was fast off once he put her on the crib. Entering the bedroom minutes after me. I stood there, my arms crossed looking at him.

“How dare you?”, I said between my teeth.

And that seemed to have an effect on him, his jaw clenched.

“How dare I?”, He asked bitterly.

“How dare you speak to him?”, I asked again.

“You are one to talk”, he rolled his eyes. My arms dropped to either side of me. “You were the one who spoke to my father twice”

“Because I did not know it was him”, I raised my voice.

“That seems convenient for you”, he bitterly said under his breath.

“What the fuck did you say to me?”, I growled at him. As he opened his mouth again. “You know what seems convenient Spencer? the fact that you seem to be completely comfortable hiding stuff from me. If I had known you were like them…”

“I am like them?”, his eyebrows shot up. “Last time I checked you were their family”, he raised his voice making emphasis in the you, enough for me to take a step back. The fury in his voice was burn between us.

“So is you daughter”, I breathed out. “Who now I understand is a burden for you”.

His face dropped, clearly understanding now what he had just said. But he said it. As in on cue Abby let out a high pitched wail. I collected one pillow and a blanket as I walked into the nursery.

My hands shaking as I got Abby.

“Daddy”, she cried for her father. My heart dropped even further. I hugged her shushing her as she calmed down. I kissed her head repeatedly. 

  
  


She was the best thing to ever happen to me, and the fact… I breathed heavily sitting in the chair. Part of me wanting the door to open, but it didn’t I curled up with my daughter in my arms in the chair. Throwing the blanket on us.

I would protect her, I would always protect her. I would not let what happened to me happen to her. I breathed in the distinct smell of her head. The smell of the baby soap with her own natural scent. I closed my eyes, letting slumber creep on me.

When I woke up I could feel the emptiness in my arms. I jerked up quickly my eyes landing on the man with the baby in his arms next to the crib. He hummed softly.

_ ‘I wish I hadn’t wasted time arguing with her’ _

Rossi’s words came back to me as I saw Spencer. How many times could we fight before we became our parents? A pain stung my heart. If he really just asked for his blessing, that wasn’t that bad right? If he really was going to ask me to go to New York with him, there was no harm in that right?

There was something worse than to argue, it was to walk away. Because the pain I felt right now was indescribable and I wish we could have found closure to our arguments today.

But he stood there, his back to me. Not realizing I was awake. He stood there and he was there and I could reach him, and I could hug him if I could. He could hold me because right now we were both alive. Broken but breathing.

He turned around when I put my feet on the ground.

“You fell asleep with her”, he explained, his eyes were swollen behind his glasses. He had been crying.

I nodded, right, parenting 101 do not fall asleep with your baby in a place where they could just crawl away or fall.

“(y/n) I’m really sorry… for everything”, he said softly, hurt in his words.

I looked at him. I loved him, I loved him more than life itself.

“Let’s go to bed”, I said. Refusing to let precious moments slip from me. I was here and he was here. There wasn’t anything assuring us we would be here tomorrow.

He seemed hopeful, but then he looked down at Abby.

“All three of us”, I nodded, collecting the things and walking to the bedroom. 

  
  


They walked to the bed but I entered the bathroom. I took my makeup and clothes off. Walking to one of the cabinets I pulled out on of Spencer’s undershirts. I shrugged into it. The smell of him and laundry filling my lungs. Tears pooled in my eyes, there was a sense of relief in them.

When I got out Spencer sat in the bed looking at Abby who was still sleeping, I walked to his side of the bed, eyes following me. I sat in front of him.

“Let’s argue”, I said, he narrowed his eyes confusedly. “Let’s argue this out, even if it takes us all night, because I’m scare the moment you stop talking to me”, My voice got smaller, as tears pooled in my eyes again.

He reached for my hands quickly. “Abby did not interrupt my plans, I swear to you. She is the best thing to happen in my life I would never ever see her as a burden.”, he said.

“Why did you not send the papers in then?”, I asked him, my eyes seeking his. The hazel glossy eyes drilling mine. He knew what I was doing, Trying to see if somehow they could tell me if he was lying.

“Because i realized asking you to move was too much, and the thought of losing you was too hard to accept. So I decided not to, and then you gave me the best news you could have given me. I was already the happiest man on earth, I didn’t want things to change”, he said. 

I rubbed his hands. His eyes had not left mine, not even when his voice broke mid sentence.

“I did not know I was talking to your dad the first time, but the second. The second time I did not see him as your dad, I saw him as any other dad. Any other parent who was trying to prove something”, I said. 

“He called me for my birthday, he never calls”, he frowned slightly. “I shouldn’t have thrown that at your face, I was frustrated.”, I nodded.

“I believe you when you say you called my dad for my blessing”, I said.

“I did, I told him we will get married. I told him you would never feel alone ever again… and I broke that promise.”, he said, again taking his eyes away from mine.

“I know you had good intentions, I get it. I wish you could have told me, and I wish I didn’t have to find out through my brother”, I said. He looked at me again.

“I don’t want to lose you”, his voice shook me to my core. “I promise you I will not keep secrets from you”, he said. His face seeked mine but I moved it away.

“I’ve told you a thousand times to not make promises you can’t keep.”, I said, his face dropped. “So I will be holding you on that one. Spencer please talk to me, never stop talking to me and I promise I will do the same. We cannot walk away everytime we fight, and we are not perfect people. So if we need to fight let’s fight”, I said letting the tears roll down my face.

“I know, I know. I want to live the rest of my days with you. I don’t want to go to bed wondering if you’ll be here the next day. I want to be the love story our daughter and future kids grow up to look up to. I want to give them everything that was taken from us”, he said, drying the tears of my face as some rolling down his.

“I love you Spencer”, I cried.

“I love you too”, he breathed out, this time I let his lips meet mine.

I knew we could make it, I knew it because it was him and I. My mouth opened to make room for his tongue as my hands placed themselves behind his neck. Every single atom of my being needed him. He placed his hand behind my face as the messy kiss continued. the saltiness of both our tears flavored our puckered mouths as we tried to express to each other the admiration we felt. Our entire world, our entire lives shrunk to this moment as his mouth danced with mine. I could barely feel it, like an extension of my being that belonged there. Although my heart soared everytime I took a breath and smelled his entire being. He was letting me know he would not waste another day, he would not let time slip from us either. Once we pulled apart the smacking sound of our mouths was the only evidence of our mutual worship. He gave me two smaller kisses.

“I love you”, he said again, I nodded with my eyes closed.

I took a deep breath and stood up, walking to my side of the bed I laid down. We both laid sideways looking at our daughter in the middle. When my hand placed on her back he placed his on top.

“You two are by far the best thing to ever happen to me”, he said. I squeezed his hand as my eyelids getting heavy. 

  
  


_ “Often a sweetness comes as if on loan, stays just long enough to make sense of what it means to be alive, then returns to its dark source. As for me, I don’t care where it’s been, or what bitter road it’s traveled to come so far, to taste so good.” _

_ -Sweetness,, by Stephen Dunn _

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! I really really hope you're liking the story so far. I received a comment about how the whole story was just messy and meaningless fluff. Although that person seemed to delete the comment before I could reply I agree. Yet I have become attached to the characters of (y/n) and Abby, and of course in a way I am proud of the way I've used the CM characters. 
> 
> So for those who are liking the story, thank you, from the bottom of my heart. I will continue this fic until you guys stop liking it.
> 
> Also! I'm sorry for the angst lol, this chapter was really fun to write.


	25. Chapter 25

I watched as the kid and the dog stood on the glass door, their noses pressed against it. Abby whined again now pressing her hands against the glass.  
The innocence radiating from the duo as their mesmerized faces tried to take in the scenery, 

“Daddy is coming any minute”, I said buttering some bread as I put the tray in the oven. I put it in the lowest setting and walked towards Abby.

The backyard looked magical, the first snow of the year had fallen for the last hour. Now that the snowflakes fell few and far between the whole place was covered by a thick layer of white fluff. I smiled looking at Abby. Yeah there was the possibility she will not remember her first snow, but we would show her pictures. Most importantly we would have the memory ingrained in our brains. That’s why I was waiting for my fiance to get home.

As I sipped from my hot tea I heard the front door. I walked to the hallway, where he stood shaking the snow off his clothes. He looked adorable under his black coat, a beanie in which some of his curls poked out of, and his purple scarf. Running towards him I launched into his arms, making him tumble and press against the door as I hooked my arms around his neck.

After our fight two weeks ago we had become a lot better at communicating. The relationship felt stronger now, which in turn made us two idiots in love. 

“Hey”, he chuckled with a big toothy smile on his face. 

“Hey”, I said, puckering my lips for him to press a kiss in them. He did, giving me a couple of loud kisses, I smiled halfway through.

“Sorry I’m late, some roads are blocked.”, he apologized looking at me with his lips twisted now, I kissed his scrunched nose as he smiled again.

“It’s okay”, I smiled foolishly up at him. “Did you get the stuff?”, I asked, taking one step back as he handed me the bag.

“Yes you got the good kind of Maple syrup”, I said excitedly.

“Only the best for Mrs Reid”. How could a simple Mrs make my knees tremble? I would never know. 

“How was your day?”, he asked, undoing his scarf but leaving it around his neck.

“Good, we are super excited”, I said, moving aside so he could see at the end of the hallway the little girl. I

“Hello Abby”, Spencer said loud enough to get her attention, she immediately turned around and crawled towards us, giggles escaping her mouth. 

He walked towards her, when she was in front he squatted on the floor, the kid propped herself up on his knee, she had been doing that a lot lately. She would start walking any day now. Spencer puckered his lips now, and Abby placed a kiss in them. He smiled widely.

“You need to do your dad a favor and stop growing up so fast”, he picked her up, putting the baby on his hip. 

I glided towards the counter where some of the clothes laid. Spencer sat the girl on the counter as he helped me change her. Once she was done the faux hairs covered her face. Spencer smiled as he adjusted the little hoodie.

“There’s my little girl”, He said smiling. Abby in return just put her gloved hand up to him, moving her fingers. She babbled a little probably complaining of being bundled up.

I got ready myself, stepping into the boots when I was all done. 

“Are you ready?”, I asked excitedly. He nodded picking Abby up as I grabbed the bag. 

When the door opened the crisp cold air hit our faces. Spencer eyed Abigail as her eyes lit up. Goofy was already bouncing on the edge of the property, burrowing himself in snow.

I grabbed the circular sled that we had bought and placed it in the ground. Spencer walked over and placed Abby in the middle, the snow crunching and giving in a little bit. 

The girl giggled excitedly. Although Spencer had made sure to buy heavy duty clothes he stopped Abby’s hand when she tried to reach in to the snow. I squatted in front of her. The snowflakes were falling a little more now, I stuck my tongue out waiting for one to land on it and then smiling when it did. 

Abby who was slightly frowning did the same, bursting a laugh when her tongue felt the coldness. 

Spencer grabbed some snow placing it in the sled, the kid played with it, interested in the way the snow molded at her will. 

“Daddy”, she complained, when she noticed her glove had some snow stuck on it. She put her little hand in front of his face.

“Let me help you with that”, he said cleaning her hand, she inspected it again, and when she decided it was clean enough she stuck it back on the snow.

I laughed contently, sitting now in the snow and letting my body fall on it.

“Be careful sweet girl”, he said, I smiled.

“I love snow, I love winter”, I said sitting back up when the coldness crept on me.

“It’s okay”, he shrugged.

“Oh I’m sorry Mr Vegas, I forgot you had hot blood”, I joked.

“I don’t, I quite like the cold weather, I do prefer the temperatures of fall though. It’s the perfect balance between cold and not cold enough to need shelter.”, he concluded.

“Well I love the cold cold”, I said smiling. “The one that has one needing to cuddle”, I started getting some stuff out of the bag. He tilted his head watching me. The kid was too busy inspecting the slightly melted pile in front of her. 

I made two little indentations on a pile of clean snow and I poured some of the syrup in them. Opening the lollipop sticks I started poking the liquid until it became hardened, at which point I sprinkled some of the ginger powder and rolled them around the stick. I handed one to Spencer and I kept the other one.

He smiled liking it and nodding his head.

“You are right this is good”, He said.

“I know it is, see? you are eating something that was literally made in the ground”, I said licking some of my own candy. 

“Well, according to several studies fresh snow is as clean as any drinking water. Since snowflakes have less probabilities of catching pollutants than raindrops”, he said licking his candy again. 

Now abby was more interested in whatever we were eating than the snow. She leaned forward.

“Daddy”, she said in a questioning matter. Spencer looked at her then at me.

“I don’t want her having a sugar rush like that time Penelope gave her chocolate syrup”, I said.

But Abby looked at Spencer with those eyes she made. The ones I was one hundred percent sure she only used on him because they worked. He could not say no to her and she knew that.

Spencer pouted my way and I rolled my eyes trying to content my smile. 

“Just a little bit”, I said, as he happily complied.

The kid licked the candy and licked her lips a couple of times, probably trying to decide how to feel. Once she decided she liked it she opened her mouth, Spencer chuckled placing a little bit on the candy on it. I took pictures of the whole interaction.

Feeling the warm in my chest as Spencer and Abby looked at each other with the purest form of love. The last picture was the last, Spencer’s laugh captured as Abby opened her eyes widely at the flavor of ginger mixed in the sugary substance.

She chewed before the mixture melted, a laugh escaping her mouth.

I was too busy working on my own treat when I felt the snow hit my face. Spencer tried to play innocent, instead focusing on the kid, a grin in his lips though.

“Spencer!”, I said, cleaning the snow out of my hoodie. I grabbed a handful, making sure not to press it and keep it as light as possible, I threw it and hit it right at the side of his face. 

I stuck the tip of my tongue out.

“You are on”, He said quickly getting up, I did the same as my fight or flight hit me. Running on the other direction, I collected more snow turning around and throwing it at him.

Abby clapped excitedly at our childish antics as he repeatedly threw snowballs at me. We ran around the backyard, neither of us ceasing until we made it back to where Abby was. Still in the sled but slightly knelt now, having probably followed us around with her gaze.

I felt his weight hit mine as we both tumbled to the ground, he placed his hand behind my head before it even hit the snow. 

“Spencer”, I complained laughing, as the grin on his face grew.

“Pencel”, the baby repeated, her tongue twisting at the last letter. 

Still on the ground we both turned to see her. A big laugh exploding from my chest.

“Oh no”, he laughed, sitting up and placing her on his lap.

“I think you are no longer daddy”, I joked sitting up.

Abby looked confused but still continued to play with the snow. I noticed her red nose.

“I think that’s enough for tonight”, I took a couple of breaths before standing up, lending a hand at Spencer as he stood up with me.

“She called me Spencer”, he narrowed his eyes and I laughed again.

After the three of us got a hot bath and ate the soup I had made we decided to take all of the blankets and pillows we had at home and throw them around the big window, so we could see the snow as it fell again over the city. 

I handed Spencer his hot chocolate, as Abby nursed on her bottle, too busy looking outside. It was a miracle her sugar rush had died after the bath. 

I sat next to him, placing my head on his shoulder.

“A winter wedding?”, he asked, I shook my head.

“Fall, someone told me how fall was the perfect weather”, I joked.

“Fall it is”, he smiled, as we both drank from our mugs. Even when the chocolate was sweet Spencer felt the need of adding an outrageous amount of marshmallows on top.

“At this point your blood is like ninety percent sugar”, I joked.

“Weird because I know this sweet girl who I’m sure that is her body composition. Her lips taste of butterscotch and her smile is made of cotton candy. Her face as sweet as caramel syrup and her body made of honey drops.”, He looked at me, I felt my cheeks burn.

“Are you always this flirtatious Doctor Reid?”, I asked. I giggled dumbly at the way the chocolate had given both of us mustaches.

“Only for the love of my life”, He licked my top lip and I laughed again.

Abby who had decided she had enough of the night crawled towards Spencer.

“Daddy tory”, she demanded, Spencer smiled at her. He placed a kiss on my lips before I collected the mugs and bag of marshmallows and put it in the side.

“Are you ready for your bedtime story?”, he asked. When she just looked up he placed a kiss on her forehead. Abby was very smart, too smart sometimes. She surprised me sometimes at how quick she could pick stuff up. She knew bedtime story signaled time to sleep, and demanded to always be read one.

I reached for the book we had chosen beforehand.

Spencer was the first to lay on the ground, placing Abby at one of his sides. I layed next to her.

“Mommy and daddy love you so much, my sweet sweet little pumpkin. Forever and always”, I kissed her nose and she puckered her lips for me to give her another one. She looked up at Spencer, now that her goodnight words were said she was ready.

Spencer cleared his throat, opening the book. 

“Once when I was six years old I saw a magnificent picture in a book, called True Stories from Nature, about the primeval forest.”, he started reading. Our bodies were close enough to feel the warmth radiating from each other as we both looked up at him.

The Little Prince was probably not a book to read a eleven month old. But one, Abby was content to just hear her father’s voice most of the time, Spencer could read out of a physics book and she would fall asleep to it. Two, the book was a little longer, and secretly I wanted to hear as he read it. A smile on my face as I saw how Abby fought to keep her eyes open.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Getting back with the fluff <3\. 
> 
> I have some more angst for the future but I just need to write all the Dad!Spencer I have store din my heart.


	26. Chapter 26

“Are you ready to have a toddler at home?”, JJ asked, with a comical tone.

I looked over at where Abby Jack and Henry were, watching as Spencer showed one of his magic tricks. I shook my head.

“Not at all”, I said.

“You guys will be fine”, Aaron said handing me an JJ a mug of tea each. 

“I don’t think he will”, I said pointing at Spencer. “He thinks she is growing way too quick”

“Of course he is”, JJ rolled her eyes.

“Well that I can sympathize with, I cried when Jack went potty by himself”, we both looked at him amusedly at the impromptu confession by the man. The three of us smiled before looking at the kids again.

If Abby had her dad wrapped around her finger, and she did, she had her cousins eating from the palm of her little hand. Jack and Henry were head over heels for her, making sure they only played games that she could participate in and not complaining when all she wanted to do is play with one of her interactive toys. Spencer, had also changed her magic routine. Showing only the ones that the infant could understand, mostly the making colorful objects appear out of thin air.

“She is really turning one in a week uh?”, Aaron said. I looked over at him.

“Don’t tell me, I remember that night so vividly. I really thought I was going to bed and getting eight hours of sleep, and then I didn't have proper sleep for six months”, I said, twisting my lips.

“Oh yeah, the sleepless nights, can’t say I miss them.”, JJ said with a smile on her face.

As I sipped from my drink I saw her hand travel to her lower stomach. I didn’t mention anything, instead just focusing on the three laughing kids now.

“Dinner is ready”, Will announced. Everyone turned to the table that had been laid out.

“Let’s go wash our hands!”, Spencer said standing up, the kids took off running to the bathroom as Abby stood up without propping on anything. Spencer who was standing in front of her took a step back, crouching and opening his arms. She had been really good at walking while grabbing onto stuff. Her new favorite activity was standing up on the crib and yelling until someone went to get her, just for her to demanded be put on the floor right away so she can explore.

I sat on the edge of my seat, my heart racing as Abby looked uncertain. When the kids re-entered the room Jack ran to where Abby was.

“Come here Abby”, the kid said, reaching his hand out. Jack and Henry had both asked about a thousand times when the little one was going to walk. Spencer had been patient, explaining them how the whole walking process worked. Abby seemed to consider it for a second. Looking down at her feet before losing balance and falling on her butt.

I sucked my lips in, waiting to see if she would cry or just ignore the fall. To everyone’s luck it was the later. Looking up at her dad unbothered.

“Come here Abby”, I called, the kid looked over and crawled happily towards me, climbing on my lap quickly. I kissed the side of her head looking at Spencer, who just smiled softly.

“Almost there”, I said, as everyone stood up and walked towards the table. 

I’ve had three other serious boyfriends before Spencer. None of them had come close to make me feel what I felt for him. Right now as we were both naked in bed, the morning sun peeking through the curtains I was a hundred percent sure no one will make me feel like this. I rested my head on his shoulders as my hand dragged across his chest. His fingers lightly scratched my back. 

“I don’t know about an outside wedding”, he replied at my idea, the one that had made us lose the clothes in the first place. “Weather is unpredictable, the probabilities of something going wrong increase. Besides we would need a lot more preparations to make sure the place is suitable for kids.”

Making wedding plans was difficult. Even more when any mention of the wedding prompted Spencer to start undoing my clothes. I thought we had a lot of time, having decided on November sixteenth for the ceremony. I was mistaken, planning a wedding was hard. I had asked Garcia to be my maid of honor and after she gleefully accept it she was the one who opened my eyes to everything. Every little detail had to be planned, deadlines just seemed to blur with each other at this point. Of course there was always Rossi’s option in which he offered to fly us all to Italy and have the ceremony there, everything paid and prepared by him. When I had declined, saying that we couldn’t let him spend that kind of money he talked us into letting him pay for the honeymoon. Idea to which both of us weren’t keen of, but he had been insistent and refused to take no for an answer. I would be lying if I said that a honeymoon in Europe didn’t sound like a dream.

“Yeah I don’t want to wear a coat over my dress”, I scrunch my nose up. His eyes seeked mine, I could see the brightness in them as he gave me a small kiss.

“You are going to be the most beautiful bride, even if you come out in sweats”, he said. I smiled foolishly at him.

I hummed happily as I snuggled closer to him, and then the familiar cry came from the next room. I closed my eyes quickly, snoring softly through my mouth. When I didn’t feel the movement from Spencer I opened one eye. Seeing as he looked at me amusedly.

“I got her”, he smiled. I snored again closing my eyes. Once he was gone I sprawled across the bed, groaning as I stretched over the mess of blankets.

“What do you want for breakfast?”, Spencer entered the room with Abby, who was sucking her thumb and sleepily laying her head on his shoulder.

He was wearing his pj’s now, the ones that matched Abby’s and I’s. A red flannel set.

“Oatmeal?”, I said, he nodded his head as he walked out.

It was a saturday, so I didn’t care when I slipped into my own Pj’s and walked out. Opening the door for Goofy and then closing it quickly when the cold air hit me. Spencer was busy boiling the milk as Abby laid on the couch watching some cartoons on TV. I walked towards her.

“Good morning sunshine”, I said, picking her up and sitting her on my lap. She complied now laying on top of me. I puckered my lips at her, she saw them and ignored them, paying attention to the TV again.

I chuckled just hugging her until Spencer called us for breakfast. He read a book while I tried to convince Abby to let me feed her, when that didn’t work I gave her the spoon and scrolled through my phone for the rest of breakfast.

“Have I told you you are the best fiance ever?”, I said, putting my dishes in the sink after I was done.

“You might have mention it”, he said, I stood on my toes to give him a kiss on his cheek. He smirked at that as he continued washing the dishes.

I walked towards the front door, opening it and considering if it was worth it to go get the mail in the snow. I decided to do it, putting my coat and boots on and as quickly as I could going to the mailbox. Once I was inside in the warm house I shrugged the snow off, taking the gear off and walking back in the kitchen.

“Almost done baby?”, I asked Abby. She seemed to not be having it today.

She frowned at me.

“You are not in the mood today uh?”, I pointed out the obvious, planting a kiss on her forehead, lingering to see if she had gotten a fever. When I saw she didn’t I turned back to the counter.

Spencer looked worriedly at her. I shot him a smile. 

“She’s fine”, I assured.

I fumbled through the mail, separating the letters in small piles and taking one from the bunch.

“Is that from my mom?”, Spencer asked, his eyebrows slightly furrowed.

“yep”, I popped the p, Opening the letter and reading it.

“Can I know what it says?”, he asked curiously.

“Nope”, I said in the same tone. He pouted at my direction. “We are having girl talk about the wedding.”, I explained, he pushed his bottom lip even more.

“Next time you write her tell her that she also has a son, and that he’s been waiting for a reply to his letter for a week”, he said trying to sound bitter but failing.

“I will, if it fits.” I said absently, as I saw him approached the girl on the high chair. The morning oatmeal, which she refused to have fed to her, was sprawled all over the place now.

“Did someone make a big mess?”, he asked.

“Daddy”, the girl cried, reaching her arms up at him, he picked her up quickly. She snuggled on his chest, as he tried to get everything back in the plastic bowl.

“You need to eat more than that”, he said bringing the bowl to the sink. 

I walked towards the living room once I was done with the letter, happy to hear how Diana was doing.. We had spent Thanksgiving with her in Vegas, and she was happy when I had asked her for advice on the wedding. She had been really helpful on everything. It made me happy to know she was going to be involved in all the planning, and I know it made her happy as well. I sat on the couch, Spencer sitting next to me with a clean Abby in his arms.

“Daddy”, the girl cried trying to break away from him. He sighed putting her on the ground, where she crawled towards the toy in the middle of the carpet. She started pressing the buttons, letting different animal sounds fill the room.

“I think I’ll take a shower”, Spencer said after a second, I sniffed dramatically and nodded. “Oh is that so?”, he asked playfully, pulling me close for a hug, I chuckled at the way he pressed my face against his body. 

When we separated Abby was looking at us with a frown on her face.

“Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed today”, I said, sliding off the couch and joining her. She ignored me while pressing more buttons.

Spencer stood up from the couch with a smile. Abby looked over at him.

“Daddy”, she cried.

“I need to take a shower baby, I’ll be right back, be good with mommy alright?”, he said softly. I was surprised he didn’t succumb to the child and stayed immediately. 

Abby frowned even more, pouting now as Spencer watched her entertained by her temper.

He, without turning around, took a step back. In defiance the kid crawled towards him, he took another step. Abby now propped herself up with the help of the coffee table, not at all happy by how her dad was not giving in. He tried to hide a smile as he took another step. Abby did so too, taking small tumbly steps till she was on the edge of the table. Spencer took another small step back. The kid considered it for a second, letting go of the surface and taking a shaky step towards him. We both caught our breaths. The kid took another two steps, tumbling as she was about to take the fourth one. Spencer catching her in the air before she hit the floor.

“You did it!”, he said now excitedly.

“Oh my God Abby!!”, I exclaimed, standing up and joining them.

“You took your first steps”, Spencer sobbed hugging both of us. He peppered kisses on her face. She was confused now, not understanding what the fuss was all about.

I laughed happily as he placed a kiss on my forehead. She had just taken her first steps without help. My heart beat becoming faster from the excitement of the moment. Before realizing that I would be soon chasing little Abigail Reid around the house. The horror settled in my face, as I looked up at Spencer who had the same face. We probably were thinking the exact same thing. Still he laughed, hugging us both closer to him now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there it is, your daily dose of fluff. 
> 
> I hope you guys have a great weekend, I love y'all!


	27. Chapter 27

“Doctor Reid”, I offered the man his glass of champagne.

“Thank you Ms (y/ln)”, he said in a soft tone.

I smiled, taking my own and sitting next to him on the couch. Tucking my legs under me I rested my head on his shoulder. He smiled down at me, kissing my head.

The glistening lights of the Christmas tree were the only source of light in the house. The speckles made Spencer’s eyes glow while he looked it over. The bottom surrounded by presents, some with birthday wrapping paper some with Christmas ones. The choice of putting the presents the day before was a tactical one, mainly to get Abby out of opening everything. The kid was adventurous, and after one time Spencer let his satchel on the floor and she decided that his files needed rearranging we learned our lesson. 

“To think that two Christmas ago I was at my apartment, thinking this could never happen to me”, he confessed in a soft manner. 

I hated when I heard stuff like that, it made me realize just how oblivious Spencer was of his own worth. Was it really that hard for him to understand any woman would be lucky to have him? But not any woman had him, he was mine, so I climbed in his lap. Resting my feet on the couch as he hooked an arm around me.

“Two Christmas ago I was walking the streets of New York City aimlessly”, I chuckled.

“Looking for trouble I suppose”, he met my eyes. I smiled coyly.

“I would never”, I said, he smiled.

“Do you know that over fifty six percent of adult Americans think soulmates exist?”, he said, I shook my head no while listening to him. “They do, which I always found particularly strange. The numbers are exponentially larger in the south, but still fifty six seemed ridiculous to me. Even weirder the young couples are the ones who believe it the least, with older couples expressing how sure they are soulmates are real. I remember reading this a while back and thinking how weird it was to believe in it, I considered it one of those lies people decide to believe because it gives life meaning. Little unharmful lies that we tell each other to get us through the day.” He paused for a second, looking down at me.

I placed my hand on his cheek, rubbing the stubble with my thumb.

“Then I met you, and everything made sense, I thought to myself ‘this is what those people felt’. Suddenly the data seemed correct, and when you loved me back I realized that soulmates was much more than just love. It was finding that person who made you feel like those lies were not lies after all.” He smiled at me when he was done.

“You Doctor, are going to be in trouble when you write those wedding vows.”, I said with my voice shaking more than I intended it to.

How could he say those things and expect me not to instantly combust? 

“Not at all, the oxford dictionary has two hundred seventy three thousand words. With more being created every day. Besides I could always use another language”, he proposed in an entertained tone. I crooked an eyebrow.

“Te amo”, he gave me a small peck on the lips. “Ich liebe dich”, another one. “ya tebya lyublyu”, another one. “je t’aime”, He pressed his lips against mine, this time giving me a proper kiss as I returned it more than happily. His lips were persistent on mine, I could barely breath from the way our faces wanted to be physically impossible close.

“You can use the language you want”, I said separating a little to catch a breath. He smiled victoriously at my comment as he placed a small kiss on the top of my nose.

I looked over to the clock on the wall.

“Merry Christmas Doctor Reid”, I took my glass again, clinking it against his.

“Merry Christmas Ms (y/ln)”, he said as we both drank.

“Coming!””, I said walking to the front door, who was going to be knocking our door Christmas day at ten AM?

The team had disperse this Christmas. Penelope joining Morgan in Chicago to visit his family. Aaron and Rossi were probably going to celebrate together with Jack. Emily had said her mom was planing a Christmas Eve event. JJ and Will were joining some of her family in Arlington. We had decided to stay and celebrate Abby’s birthday at home.

That’s why when I opened the door, and saw everyone standing with a bright smile I was confused.

“Merry Christmas!”, Everyone said excitedly.

“What are you guys doing here?”, I smiled.

“Do you really think we will miss Abigail’s first birthday?”, Rossi asked, I moved aside as he made his way in. I guess it was a good thing Spencer and I had gotten dress up in the morning.

“Aren’t you supposed to be in Chicago? The two of you?”, I looked at Derek and Penelope.

“We took a plane at seven this morning, I told my mom I had to be here for my Goddaughter”, he smiled.

“You guys didn’t have to do that”, I said surprised. “And you two, I thought you were staying in Arlington for the week.”, I looked at JJ.

“Oh come on, it’s a really short drive”, she waved me off.

I looked over at Emily who just put her hands up.

“I love my mom, in small doses and once a year”, she said. I chuckled.

“Merry Christmas!”, Henry and Jack came forward to give me a hug, which I reply.

“Merry Christmas boys”, I smiled. “Come on in do you need help?”, I offered, as everyone had their hands full with what I imagine was food. Penelope handed me a bag of produce as we made our way to the living room.

“Hey!”, Spencer said surprised standing up from his spot on the floor and walked to offer everyone hugs. “What are you guys doing here?”, he asked.

“Well, we had to spend Chrtismas with family!”, Penelope said.

I watched as Jack and Henry walked towards where Abby was playing. The kid was excited to see her cousins.

“Show me the birthday girl!”, Emily said, and everyone followed her to offer Abby her congratulations. She bounced on her butt excitedly at the attention. Spencer collected some of the torn wrapping paper and walked to the kitchen to dispose of it.

“Did you know?”, he asked, I shook my head with a smile.

“Okay okay”, Garcia came in shushing Spencer out. “You might be a genius but you cannot cook, so out”, she said.

I watched the scene amusedly as Will and Rossi came and joined us.

“Turkey is ready, we just need to reheat it”, Will said taking the foil out of what looked like a delicious Turkey.

I nodded helping him with the oven, 

“Were you guys having candy canes for lunch?”, Rossi asked narrowing his eyes as he started cutting vegetables for a salad.

“We had a Christmas dinner yesterday”, I explained. 

“Well, good thing we came prepared! Where is your wine opene- Aha!”, she said finding it in one of the cabinets as she proceeded to open the bottles. “Now out, we are preparing everything”, she said pushing me out of the kitchen to the living room where the rest were sitting around Abby.

“Merry Christmas”, Aaron said when I sat next to him.

“Merry Christmas Hotch”, I said giving him a hug.

“Jack loved the presents you guys gave him”, he smiled at me.

“I’m glad he did!”, I smiled back as our attention was now with the kids.

I looked over at Spencer who just looked confused, but with a smile on his face.

“You are not helping your case”, Emily said.

“You can say anything you want, but when bars played this songs, those were simpler times”, Rossi said. As everyone heard the soft music coming from the speakers.

After lunch we all sat down in the living room, playing some soft music as we waited for the food to settle in all of us. I was sitting on Spencer’s lap, who seemed too happy to have me there as he hugged me closer.

Spencer narrowed his eyes. “I’m pretty sure this music was predominant in the mid twenties”, he said.

“You are too young kid, even in the seventies, with the boom of disco, there were many places that liked to play smooth jazz. Ladies loved being taken there to dance.”, he said.

“Oh and I bet you loved to take them”, Morgan joked.

“Of course I did”, he stood up from the chair, walking towards Emily and offering his hand. “Like the gentleman I am”

Emily took it with a smile as Rossi started guiding her to the center of the room, quickly picking up the pace of the song.

“Okay Mister Gentleman, you are not the only one”, Morgan said standing up and pulling Garcia with them, the two followed Rossi and Emily.

“Let me just tell you gentlemen, I am from Louisiana, so I will definitely make you both look like fools”, Will said, as JJ laughed when he guided her to the center of the room.

Aaron laughed watching everyone. “Are you not taking her?”, He asked looking at Spencer.

He looked up at me for a second before putting us both in the ground.

The kids were taking a nap, Henry and Jack asking if they could take it in the nursery in case Abby woke up. It warmed my heart, and made me think about how much trouble anyone who messed with Abby was going to be in. With the people in her life she was more than protected.

Spencer guided me to the center of the room, instead of placing his hands on my waist he placed his arms around me. His hands on my back as I placed my own arms around his neck. We started a slow pace of swinging, My head on his chest as he guided us around the room. The intimacy stretching around us, making us forget about the people who were with us in the living room. Right here right now and for all means, we were alone in our little bubble as Duke Ellington played his slow blues. From the corner of my eye I saw how Garcia was now pulling Aaron to dance, leaving Morgan as he fixed himself another drink.

Spencer pulled me closer to him, like he was avoiding me going back to reality. I too eagerly got closer to him. Our bodies barely able to move by the proximity of each other. Still our feet moved softly making our bodies dance. 

After what seemed like an eternity later he pulled away, I noticed some smiles sent our way as the song had probably ended a while back. I pressed a kiss on his lips which he replied. 

We hear a familiar giggle coming from the nursery as Spencer gave me a quick kiss and went to check on a now awake Abby.

“If I knew the only thing I needed to get Reid to shut up was to get you and him together I would’ve taken you to him the first day of Henry’s class”, Emily joked.

I chuckled at her shaking my head and taking a seat. I felt slightly lighter than before, my head around spinning with the clearest sign of love.

“Daddy!”, the kid called again, from her place on the bed. 

“I’m coming I’m coming”, Spencer came out now in his pajamas. Abby reached her arms out for him to pick her up, which he did. Then he laid on the bed with her laying on his chest.

“She is officially one”, I said, laying next to them and smiling at the image.  
“She really is”, he kissed Abby’s head. The kid was sucking on her thumb with her eyes wide open. I caressed her cheek and she just let me, her eyes seeking mine.

“You are no longer a baby”, I said smiling. Spencer frowned.

“Yes she is”, he said. “She’ll always always be my little baby”, He kissed her head again, the kid giggled like she could understand.

“I don’t know Doctor Reid, I think now you have a toddler to chase around…”, I joked.

He looked down at abby as his eyes sparkled. 

“Tell mommy you’ll always stay this tiny, so you can always and forever sleep in my chest like this”, he cooed. I smiled widely at the way he hugged her closer.

I shook my head, leaning to give them each a kiss on their cheek. I stayed next to Abby, pressing my face against her and tickling her cheek with my nose.

“Happy Birthday little princess.”, I cooed as the kid pushed me away. She seemed not thrilled that I had ruined a very intimate moment between her and her dad. 

I laughed letting my head fall back on the pillow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just as an FYI the next chapter will include some hurt/comfort. I’m trying to find a balance between fluff and angst but one always seem to win. Can you guess which one?


	28. Chapter 28

“I don’t know, I think you are not an expert on Indian cuisine”, I said absentmindedly while the teenage girl scanned our groceries.

“I never said I was an expert, I said I’ve read some very throughout books that encouraged me to try and cook a dish myself”, he corrected, an amused tone in his voice as he bounced Abby in his arms.

“You should know that from the book to the practice there is a long way”, I warned, with some laughter in my voice.

“I learned to cook mostly by reading”, he defended himself.

“Exactly, that’s why I’m the one that cooks”, I said. The girl in front of us left out a chuckle.

“In my defense I did cook for myself for the first thirty years of my life.”, he added looking between us as we shared an amused glance.

“I know, and I cannot wait for you to make us some curry”, I said looking at him, as I slid the card to pay.

“Daddy is about to surprise mommy tonight.”, Spencer said bouncing Abby as the kid giggled. “Yes he is, we are going to prove her wrong”, he placed a kiss on her cheek. “You are going to help me little pumpkin”, He smiled. I dumbly looked at them as another guy bagged the groceries.

“Oh sorry”, the girl said, looking at her ringing phone, soon after everyone’s phone followed in the noise making.

Here is the thing, before dating Spencer when I heard an Amber alert. My reaction was the same as everyone’s. A sad thought, reading the information that would probably be ingrained in my brain for a couple of minutes maximum and then that was it. The world continued spinning. There were a couple of times in which I thought about how awful this was, while a family was probably devastated the rest of the world was oblivious. My point proven by the way the grocery store came back to life after everyone had silenced their phones. Now that I was with Spencer thought, my heart ached in a whole different way. Sure enough not even two minutes later he was receiving a call.

Abby was quickly passed to my arms as he loaded the groceries in the cart. I followed him after getting the receipt.

“Yes, I got it”, he said, by the time I was next to him he had already loaded the car. I buckled Abby as quick as I could, the kid moving uncomfortably by the restrain before I handed her her bottle.

“Can you drop me off? We are close to the abduction site”, he said, looking at his phone. I nodded climbing in the driver’s seat. 

Once he gave me the directions I made my way through the neighborhood, taking us less than fifteen minutes to get to the house. The house where it had happened wasn’t hard to find. Two cop cars and several people surrounding the area. I could see a woman, about my age, yelling uncontrollably as a female officer hugged her. A man, a couple of feet in front of us, pulling on his hair as a police man took his statement. The scene, was clearly heartbreaking for anyone. For me, with Abby in the back seat, it was impossible. I couldn’t imagine what I would do if something like this happened to me. The feeling in my heart only got worse once Spencer pulled his holstered gun from the locked glove box. 

I couldn’t ignore the guilt in my body. Most of the time I liked to ignore the fact that Spencer was always the first who got in the car, so he could put his gun and secure it. Most of the time I liked to ignore how dangerous his job was, and it wasn’t fair. Because he knew that everytime he put a foot in the field he was in danger. He turned to see me.

“I guess I’ll be having takeout tonight”, I tried to joke, to lighten the mood. 

“I’ll see you guys soon”, his words sounded more like a prayer than any of us cared to admit.

“Be safe, come back home to us”, The so familiar words left my mouth without my brain absorbed them.

We had promised a long time ago we would not say goodbye. ‘I’m not going anywhere’ He had said. Instead I just begged him to come back to me in one piece. My words were heavy in my heart. How could so little words mean so much? But he knew they did. ‘Don’t let this be the last time I see you’

He nodded solemnly, turning to see Abby. I could tell how impossible it was for him to be brave enough to say the words that came out of his mouth.

“Daddy loves you so much little one, take care of mommy while I’m gone okay?”, He extended his arm to caress her cheek. Once he pulled it he gave me another weak smile as he left the car.

‘Don’t let this be the last time I see you’, I thought, as I watched him approach an officer. His stance totally different from the one I was so used to. But this was Spencer too, this was the same man. As painful as it was I needed to learn to accept it. I made a U turn, getting out of the neighborhood as a black car passed me, I knew it probably contained another member of the BAU.

Spencer had always been clear about how important it was for me not to stop my life for him. When he was gone he was sure to check on me and tell me to get out, to live as he was not where he was and instead he was at a regular job. So for his sake and mine I continued the list of errands we needed to run in the afternoon. Going to the dry cleaners, and to the postal office to mail a couple of letters. I made sure to have Abby with me at all times, not letting her move away from me for a second. Refusing to put her down and instead taking more than one trip from the car to the dry cleaners. Once we were heading home I dared to check the news.

The typical stuff came on, until there was a call for a public to keep an eye out for a woman. A voice that I recognized came through the radio. 

‘We are looking for a woman named Allison Parker, she is a twenty eight year old caucasian female. She is the aunt of Stephanie, you can find more information as well as current photo of her on the FBI’s and WPD websites.’

Aaron spoke, before another voice I didn’t recognize gave information on vehicle on when she was last seen. Then a statement from the parents, my heart sank but I pulled through. The mom in tears begging her own sister not to harm her daughter, asking her for mercy. Telling her how if she was to turn herself in now she would be in less trouble.

‘I just want to see my little Steph again, I just want to have her in my arms one more time.’

The words hit me like a train. Eyes pooling as I made the last turn to the house. My arms almost feeling the weight of Abby in them. I tried to shake the thoughts away, the awful thoughts like, if something were to happen, how long would it take for my brain to forget the feeling of her sleeping in my arms. I knew the numbers too well. ‘most child who are abducted are dead within the first three hours’. There was hope though, because it was her own aunt. I let myself be hopeful for once.

When I parked in the driveway the thoughts went away immediately. My hands alert as I saw the car parked in front. I didn’t recognized it. I looked through the rearview mirror, my hand traveling to the side pocket of the diaper bag, where the pepper spray can was.Yeah I might be hyper vigilant, but can anyone blame me?

I got out of the car, carefully. Before the two men came out of the parked car.

I sighed in relief, although I was still confused. “What are you doing here?”

I asked, trying to look casual as I opened the car.

“Hello daughter, is that the manners I taught you?”, My dad said crossing his arms.

“You didn’t teach me any manners, Ms Camille did”, I reminded him, opening the back door to get Abby.

“Joseph please help my daughter get her groceries inside”, My dad commanded.

“That’s not necessary”, I said lowly, but Joseph already had his hands full as we walked to the front door. I opened it with Abby in my arms, letting the man in.

“You don’t have to take them all the way to the kitchen”, I said, but he stood in the hallway waiting for the invitation anyway.

I sighed. “Ok go”, I said defeated.

Abby leaned forward trying to recognize the man in front of us.

“To what do I owe your visitation?”, I asked, more annoyed than what I meant to sound. It my defense I did not have an easy last couple of hours.

“Can I come in?”, he asked, I knew Victor Harvey too well, whatever he was here for it was best to let him have it so he could be out of my house. The sooner we could get him out the better.

“Ok”, I said moving aside. Joseph got the last of the groceries and closed the car and the front door.

I walked him to the living room. 

“Can I offer you something to drink?”, I annoyedly asked, hoping he would say no.

“A brandy”, he nodded, without putting Abby down I walked to the mini bar area and fixed him a drink, giving it to him when done.

“So this is where you live?”, he looked around the house.

“How did you know where I live?”, I asked sitting down, Abby seemed very interesting in the two strange man.

“You know I have my ways”, he waved me off. “She has gotten so big”, he said looking at Abby.

I sighed, putting the kid on the floor, she stood up before deciding she wanted to climb back in my lap.

“Daddy?”, The kid said confusedly at the absence of her father.

“Where is Spencer?”, My dad asked in a much similar tone.

“He is out on a case”, I explained shortly before looking down at the baby. “Daddy is coming home soon okay?”

The kid pouted and I placed a kiss on her forehead. I needed everyone to give me a minute right now.

“So what are you doing here”, I said looking up at my dad again.

He had a disapproving look on his face. “Well since is Saturday I hoped that I could get you both, so we could talk about Abby’s trust.”, he said.

“There is nothing to discuss, I already declined your offer.”, I said.

“You know my father left very clear instructions, anyone on the direct line has to have one.”, he said.

I wanted to roll my eyes so far back they dislodged from their sockets.

“It isn’t necessary, me and Spencer can provide her everything she needs”, I said. 

“He isn’t even here”, he pointed out. I sighed. “A trust will ensure Abby has a comfortable life, and she could need it in case anything happened to her dad.”

The words came out so easily out of him, but in this moment they were daggers to my heart. I clenched my jaw.

“We have plenty of ways we can survive”, I said bitterly.

“You know I could solve all of your problems right?”, he looked at me. I frowned looking at him.

“Spencer could come work for me”, he explained.

A huff left my lips, “Work for you?”, I said. He was incredible.

“Work with me… He could have a very comfortable job in the firm, we are in need of someone with his brains. He could come and go as he pleased, he could definitely be his own boss.”, he said.

Could he really not see how wrong he was? Even if Spencer wanted a legal job he would never work for him.

“I don’t think that’s something he would be interested in”, I cut him off.

“I could offer the three of you everything”, he said.

“Why are you doing this?”, I asked, hugging Abby close to me in a possessive manner.

“I want to make amends”, he said.

“Make amends?”, I almost yelled. “You are twenty six years too late for that”

“I know that what I did to you was wrong-”

“Wrong? Dad? Wrong?”, I hissed. “What you did to me was beyond wrong, to pretend you are not my father, to put my mom through what you did.”

“Everything I’ve done I’ve done for you and your brother”, he defended himself sternly.

“No, everything you have done you have done for yourself. For eleven years I lived under your roof, living though the abuse you and your son put me through. Part of me can't even blame Johnny, he didn’t even have a chance. I least I could escape but he never did…”

I was surprised when he just seemed sad at my words.

“Is there anything I can do for you to forgive me?”, he asked. If I didn’t know him I would’ve change my stance. Maybe given him the benefit of the doubt, let myself for a moment think he might actually change this time. I knew him though, I knew him better than what I cared to admit. For him lying was a second nature, it was what he did when he wanted to get what he wanted. And he was really used to doing that.

“You know, when I found out I was pregnant with Abby I… I was terrified dad. I really was, I thought about my own childhood. I thought about Spencer’s childhood. I thought we wouldn’t be fit to have a kid. For a split second I was scared I would ever feel something against her as you did with me. As soon as I heard her heartbeat though, I knew. Right there and then I knew I would never ever leave her. I knew I could never do any harm to her. It made me wonder why you did it to me. I knew me and him will protect her no matter what, we would never hurt her ever. We promised that to each other, that we will never make the same mistakes our parents did. You can say anything you want about him or me, but we have been true to our promise”, I said, with a tear rolling down my cheek.

“I’m sorry”, he said, his words slamming against me. I had never heard them coming from him, at least not in the discourage tone he now held. “I will leave the redacted trust, please. Consider it, you and Spencer read it carefully. If there are any things you want to change I will, even if you want more money.” 

I moved my eyes away from him. “Not for you, not for me. For her, and her future. This will ensure she has choices when she is older, she is going to be able to be whoever she wants, without financial burdens/”, he said.

Deep down I knew very few have the opportunities that Abby was being offered right now. I knew that he was right, as much as it pained me. I needed to think of her. I nodded my head slowly as Joseph placed a file on the coffee table.

As the three of us silently walked towards the door we heard a knock.

I opened it, my heart stopping.

“David Rossi?”, My dad asked in surprise.

“(y/n)”, he said ignoring him.

A buzzing in my ears clouded my mind. My heartbeat became louder and louder. Why was Rossi here? Why did he look slightly disheveled? Where was Spencer?

My stomach twisted inside me as a bitter taste flooded my mouth. The world seemed to have stopped under my feet.

“There’s been an accident”.

The words crashed against my body. I felt Abby being pried away from me as Rossi’s body tried to keep mine in my feet.

Spencer...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> remember I love you guys <3


	29. Chapter 29

Words didn’t make sense. I could hear them, I could see them. Rossi and my dad were talking, but I could not understand them. Flashes of Spencer flooded my mind, this couldn’t be happening. This cannot be happening, Spencer has to be okay. Spencer has to be in the black car, waiting to get out and hug me and hold me. He needs to be here, he needs to hold Abby. She needs to know her dad is okay, she needs to grow up with her dad by her side. I could see his face right now, so why wasn’t he here? I could smell his clothes, I could still feel the warmth of his lips on mine. Hazel eyes hunting my brain as I tried to make sense of what was happening. Why if I could feel the touch of his hand on my face wasn’t he here?

I could see Rossi calling my attention, I wanted to tell him I was here. I couldn’t. What finally pulled me out from the shock was the high pitch wailing of Abby. I turned around, as she squirmed in my dad’s arms. I quickly took her, hugging her close to me as she continued crying. 

“Tell me he’s okay”, my voice was shaky and low but it was coming. “You need to tell me he is okay”, I prayed out loud, to any entity who might be listening.

“Aaron sent me to get you, (y/n), you need to be calm for Abby.”, he said as a warning, his words came in a soothing manner but there was nothing that could stop me right now.

“Where is he?”, My dad asked.

“He is in surgery right now, he was stabbed on his side”, Rossi explained. Stabbed, what a small word. What a small word for something like that. 

“I need to go see him”, I started walking, Rossi stopped me with one arm, I felt another hand on my shoulder pulling me back. No, I can’t stay here, Spencer needs me, I need to tell him that I love him. I need to tell him that we are okay, and that he is okay. That no matter what happens he is the love of my life.

My soulmate.

My best friend.

I couldn’t fight though, and once I stopped trying to break free Rossi pulled me into a tight hug. That was all it took for me to break down, I tried to get away from his grip, Spencer needed me. My body however, was weak, and as tears started rolling down my eyes I let Rossi pull me back. 

“He has to be okay, please Rossi tell me he’ll be okay”, I said, I would’ve accepted a lie at this point. A lie that could get me through the moment, a lie that gave me enough strength to take a breath for a second. 

“I don’t know”, he said defeated, “I’ll take you to the hospital”, he said. I could see him fighting his own tears. I nodded my head, as we quickly made our way to my car. I handed him the keys as I as quickly as possible put Abby on her seat. The girl was extremely confused, and in her eyes I could see his.

Before pulling from the driveway I heard Rossi and my dad say a couple of words, before he and Joseph jumped into their car.

The drive to the hospital was quick, but also really slow. Painfully slow, I wanted a call to come, I wanted to know where he was right now. At the same time no news were good news right? I tried to keep collected, I needed to be. I needed to be fine because if I let my mind go where it wanted to be… I cannot afford to lose him.

Once Rossi parked the car he went to get Abby, I made my way inside. In the emergency room I saw the faces of everyone except the one face I wanted to see.

“What happened?”, I asked, once they all got around me. I could see the concern glances they sent me. 

Penelope was the first to hug me, based on her face she had been crying. I broke down in her arms once again.

“Tell me he is okay”, I begged Aaron, who, when Penelope pulled away sat me in a chair. 

“We don’t know”, he said, my heart shrunk. “He was stabbed on his right side”, he said. 

What did that mean, was that supposed to give me hope?

“What happened”, I asked him, he seemed to consider if I should know, before giving in.

“We got a tip with the location of the unsub, and… Spencer went in alone, Prentiss was a couple blocks away and she told him to wait. It really isn’t his fault, he followed procedure. He de-escalated the situation, but the unsub also had a knife on her, once Spencer bent to get the baby she…”, Everyone turned to see the woman who came in running into the emergency room.

“I’m so sorry”, Emily cried, crashing in my arms. I hugged her tightly. Not even an ounce of my being could be mad at her or Spencer right now. I just wanted to know he was going to be okay. 

It took a second of clarity for me to see everyone, gloomy faces looking directly at me. I hated this so much. I saw my dad and Joseph stand on the side, I didn’t even know they were here. Right now I didn’t care.

I would give everything I am and everything I own right now just to see him. For the next hour and a half the only thing in my mind was him. There was this instinct that every couple of minutes followed Abby around the room. She changed arms everytime she was getting fussy, which was often. I couldn’t even hold her right now, knowing that I couldn’t soothe her in my own state. 

As often as Abby changed arms someone changed seats. Sitting next to me everyone got their chance to try and help. Words of hopes, or silent prayers. Heavy hugs in shaky arms as my mind dissociated from the place. Spencer would have the perfect words right now, I’m sure of it. He would not let the silence fill the room, he would say something. He would talk until everyone’s attention was on him, he would make the room gravitate towards him. He would be hugging everyone, taking care of everyone. Because that is who he was, that is who he is. That is the man I fell in love with every day.

He had to be okay.

As in an answer to my prayers a doctor approached the group.

I broke away from Emily, who held my hand quietly. The group stood up, but I walked to the front, standing a couple feet away from the doctor who seemed to be considering who to speak to. Something gave it away because he looked me right in the eyes. Rossi stood by my side, with Abby in his arms. I saw as Morgan took the baby away, probably trying to protect her in case things went sideways.

Please

Please God

Please make Spencer be fine

Please… 

“Doctor Reid is fine, the knife managed to avoid any organs. He did however lose some blood, and from the position of the wound he will need some time to recover. The angle of the wound warrant for him to be put under until we could get things in control, but he has since woken up.”, he explained, I could hear some sigh of reliefs as my own body relaxed, everything after is fine was a blur for me right now.

“Are you (y/n)?”, he asked, I nodded my head with the knot in my throat still there. “He has been asking for you, and for his daughter”, his eyes traveled to Morgan. “You can come in but he needs to be still. You can get someone else to hold the baby while you see him”, he said. “Let Nurse Kelly know when you are ready”, he said.

“Thank you”, I said, he put his hand on my shoulder with a friendly smile as he walked away.

“I told you he’ll be okay”, Rossi said hugging me tightly and kissing my forehead.

I could see the expecting faces of everyone, they probably were wondering who was coming in with me. I looked around, my eyes landing on the woman. She had been crying the most, her nails almost halfway bitten. 

“Emily”, I said softly, she seemed surprised. “Would you come in with Abby and I?”, I asked crossing my arms trying to make my body regain some heat.

“Of course”, she sighed, nodding her head and drying her tears. Derek handed her the baby, hugging both of them.

The nurse very politely guided us to the room. My hands couldn’t be fast enough to open the door. The lights were bright and the air was sterile. Spencer laid in the middle of the room, his eyes closed as the bed was retracted halfway, so that he was sitting more than laying. As soon as the door opened his eyes seeked mine. I walked towards him, as he reached for my face. I hovered on top of him, looking at his face, looking at his body. Making sure he was here.

“Hey”, he said softly, his eyes seeking mine. When we finally locked gazes the tears fell once again. He put his hand behind my head and pulled me down, my face burrowing in his neck. The hospital gown offending the smell of him. I sobbed loudly as he soothed me.

“I’m here”, he said calmly. “I’m here my sweet girl I’m here”, he said again.

Once I took my face back at him.

“I love you”, I cried, and I didn’t care how shaky it came out, and how it didn’t sound like my own voice.

Tears flooded his eyes. His red tired eyes.

“I love you so much”, he said, drying the tears on my face with one hand, His other arm was bounded to his body. 

He was here…

He looked around the room.

“Reid I’m so sorry, I should have been there quicker”, Emily said quickly walking towards him, I moved a little, still taking his hand, refusing to let it go.

“It wasn’t your fault”, he narrowed his eyes. “It wasn’t”, he reassured when she started crying too.

Abby who had been too busy looking around the room looked down at the man in the bed. 

“Daddy”, the excitement on her voice contrasting with the dismal ambiance of the room.

“Abigail”, Spencer sighed, tears coming back to his face. Emily slouched over so he could touch her. I let his hand go, as it traveled to her little face. She tried to reach down at him before Emily pulled her a little, the kid cried at the action. Clearly wanting to be with her dad.

“Hey”, I soother taking her now. “Hey”, I said as she continued squirming.

“Daddy”, she cried. The cry made Spencer’s tears fall now, freely down his face.

“Let me hold her”, he almost begged, I concernedly looked down at his bandaged side under the gown. “Please, I’m fine...”, he begged again. 

Against my judgement I placed the baby on his good side. Abby quickly hugged the man happily. He placed his face on her little hair, taking in a deep breath and kissing her in the forehead.

“I love you”, he whispered softly.

“Wuv you”, Abby said happily. She puckered her lips pressing a kiss on his cheek. She looked confused at the way his face scrunched up as more tears rolled down.

“I love you”, he said, his hand seeking mine again. I took it.

I could see from the corner of my eye how Emily moved aside, giving us intimacy. I sat in the edge of the bed, making sure Abby could not move a lot as he closed his eyes, probably finding the comfort he needed. 

He really was here. I don’t know if the prayers worked, or the hope. I don’t know if the manifestation that he would be okay did the trick. All I knew is that he was here, and he was fine considering everything. I bent down and hugged both of them. The two people I loved more than anything else in the universe. My family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look I don't know if this Chapter is good, but I did cry.   
> Also the next one is full of comfort because I love you guys. 
> 
> Also Also, from the bottom of my heart thank you for following this story. I've been having a rough couple of months and reading your comments makes me so happy. As always I need to remind you you are the reason why I keep writing.


	30. Chapter 30

Sitting next to the man in the hospital bed, Abby was fixated on the tv as Elmo sang the alphabet for a second time. Her attention only deviating every minute or so. When her dad placed a small amount of slightly mushed up Jello with the spoon in front of her mouth. She opened her mouth slightly accepting the treat before going back to the TV, her big hazel eyes wide open in awe from whatever was representing each letter. Spencer took the big spoonfuls of Jello, cleaning the plastic container once he was all done. My eyes went back to the book in my hands. 

Spencer had convinced the nurses to let Abby stay after the first night. The whole day after the accident he had been in and out, probably a result of the adrenaline wearing out and his own body trying to heal. The first night the doctor had told him he needed to rest, and a baby in the room was not going to help. Rossi had taken me back home against my will, JJ had kept Spencer company. To say I fell asleep that night was a generous word. I had laid on the couch with Rossi as he held me while the tears kept coming. The stress of the day washed away with every salty tear rolling down my face. By the next day when I made it to the hospital Spencer had all the nurses and doctors wrapped around his fingers. He and Abby were too similar there. The doctor had approved Abby staying the next two nights he needed to stay in the hospital. Good news was, today was the last day. We were both a lot more rested now that our minds could finally be at peace with the presence of each other near. 

“Abby”, he called the girl, who barely shot him a glance. “Do you think if we pout enough your mom will get us another cup?”. He was clearly not speaking to his child as I looked up. 

His eyes met mine as his lower lip pushed out. I chuckled, placing a marker on the page I left off. I walked to the table on the side where the two bags were. I knew about his Jello obsession since one time while pregnant I had bought a couple of packs. All eight cups disappear by the next day. He had the audacity to blame it on my mommy brain, only confessing a little while later that same day. Apparently everyone knew about it, because Emily had walked in the day before holding two bags full of snack packs. I broke one out of the package and handed it to him. He smiled contentedly. 

“Need anything else?”, I asked amusedly when he grabbed my hand. 

“Mmm I need some medicine”, he said puckering his lips at me. 

I looked down at him. 

“Abby daddy needs a kiss”, I told the kid, she reluctantly looked at the man. Puckering her own lips and with her eyes fixed on the TV he placed a small kiss on them. 

“That’s all?”, I chuckled at his child like behavior. 

To be completely honest we had been teeth rotting sweet the last couple of days in the hospital. I couldn’t blame either of us, not right now at least. He had not said a word about what happened, I didn’t either. For now all I wanted was to enjoy his company, to express my love any way I could. 

“I need more”, he said, resuming the gesture. 

This time I bent placing a kiss on his lips. He smiled widely when I pulled away. 

“I have two kids I swear”, I said happily. He didn’t let go of my hand. 

“I love you”, he said, his eyes going soft. His voice was so low and with such honesty I could melt right here. 

“Let’s get married”, I blurted out. 

He narrowed his eyes, slightly tilting his head. 

“I thought those were the plans”, with one finger he moved the ring on mine. 

“I mean today, when we get out of here let’s get married. I’m sure you know how to get a marriage license, we can even tell my dad so he can pull some strings or something”, I said. 

He furrowed his eyes even more, trying to identify the trigger for my spontaneous hurry. I knew he knew as soon as his eyes went soft again, this time with some sadness. 

“I want our wedding day to be about us. There is no need to hurry”, he said in his soft voice. My own lips pouting now. There was a need to hurry, the reason was the same reason we were here in the first place. “Come here”, he instructed, pulling me down to the bed. I complied, sitting down. 

“I want you to know I’m yours”, I confessed. The idea of eloping had come to me the next day of the accident. When I saw him smile for the first time and I felt the sudden urge to do it as soon as possible. 

“I know that”, he said, I looked over at Abby trying to ignore his eyes. “Hey,”, he moved my face with his hand on my chin. “I know that, you do know I’m yours right? completely and wholly” 

I bent down to kiss him again once the words came out of his mouth. Only moving away when Abby pushed me slightly because I was blocking her view. The three of us turned around when the door opened. 

“I’m sorry to interrupt, I didn’t know your family was here”, the woman said politely. 

“Hello chief Strauss”, Spencer nodded at the woman. 

“Hello”, she said with a small smile on her lips. “Nice to see you again (y/n)”, she said looking at me. 

“Nice to see you too ma’am”, I nodded with a polite smile. Once the room fell silent I pulled Abby to my lap. “I will be getting us some coffee from the cafeteria”, I stood up, knowing she probably needed to speak with him alone. “Can I get you anything?”, I asked when I stood in front of her. 

“No thank you, I need to be getting back soon.”, She said. “Abigail is getting so big”, she slightly beamed at the complaining girl in my arms. 

“She is”, I agreed looking down at her. We both gave each other polite smiles. I smiled at Spencer one more time as he looked between us before I walked out. 

“Doctor Reid I am glad you are doing well”, I heard before I closed the door and walked towards the cafeteria. 

I paid for the coffees, taking my time as I prepared them in the little station. 

“Mommy”, Abby called my attention, I grabbed the sugar packet from her hands. 

“We don’t need you having a sugar rush in here”, I explained once she pouted at me. She was a whiner just like her daddy. 

After about twenty minutes I walked back to the room with the cup holder in my hand. I looked at the time, Spencer should be released in about an hour. 

I walked in the room, Strauss was absent and instead the Doctor stood in front of Spencer, who sat on the edge of the bed. 

“I’m sure”, Spencer said, his eyes meeting us. The doctor turned around and smiled at us before looking back at him. 

“Narcotics might help the recovery time be quicker”, he said. 

“No narcotics”, Spencer said sternly. 

“Okay, We will send you home with the pain killers then”, he wrote something in the chart. “You will also need an anti scarring cream, which you should apply twice a day. It will help with the itchiness.”, the doctor said, writing something down. “I will be sending a nurse with everything”, he nodded at everyone walking out. 

“You look like you need this”, I handed him his coffee, he smiled receiving it. Shifting so he was standing now. 

A small hiss escaped his mouth when his arm dropped in his side. 

“Are you okay?”, I asked concernedly. 

“I am”, he nodded, starting to work on his coffee. “I need to get change”, he said, putting the coffee down. 

“Spencer”, I called when he passed by me. 

“Yeah?”he asked, turning around. 

“Love you”, I smiled at him. Something was clearly bothering him but he smiled widely. 

“I love you too”, he said walking into the bathroom. 

  
I turned the car off once we were parked in front of the house. I was thankful the ride hadbeen smooth, I had tried to avoid any movement that might make Spencer hurt. 

“I got her”, I said, slinging the duffel bag around my shoulders. 

“That’s okay I got her”, he said unbuckling the child from the seat. 

“Spen-cer”, I said when the movement of bending down had a clear effect on him. 

“I’m fine I promise”, he gave me a small smile. 

You are not fine, you were stabbed. I thought, as I walked to the house opening the door. 

“No-uh”, I said when I saw him walk to the living room. He turned around slightly confused. 

“To the bed”, I pointed to the bedroom. 

“But-” 

“No buts, the doctor said you needed to stay in bed for a couple of days.”, I walked with him to the bedroom. 

“I’m a doctor too, you know? I think It's fine if I sit on the couch for a minute or two.”, he said. 

“Yeah and I’m sure your mathematics degree qualifies you to give health advice”, I said jokingly. He chuckled at that, Putting Abby down on the bed and starting to take his sweater off. 

I walked towards him, helping him. He turned around to face me, his face coming down to mine. The kiss turned needy way too quick, his left hand traveling to the back of my neck and pulling me too close to him. 

“Yeah that is not what the doctor meant when he said stay in bed”, I breathed once he pulled away to catch his own breath. 

“What does he know”, he said, his pupils slightly dilated. 

“Sorry Doctor Reid, I don’t think you are in any condition to do what you want to do”, I patted his chest. 

Abby who was previously asleep sat in the bed. Her wavy hair all over her face as she narrowed her eyes. 

I crawled in the bed, moving to my side as Abby climbed on my chest to resume her nap. I kissed her head looking up at Spencer. The image seemed to be enough for him to be enticed enough to join us. His good arm sneaking around my shoulders and pulling us both close. 

“What did Strauss want?”, I asked him carefully. 

“She heard that I might not be able to go back in the field for at least two months. Offered me a lecturer job in the academy”, I looked up at him. 

“Teacher?”, I asked, he nodded. 

“Something like that” 

“You want to do that?”, I asked, my hand rubbing Abby’s back. 

“I really liked when I was Gideon’s TA”, he sighed. His eyebrows furrowing when he remembered the man. 

I had heard enough about him to know how important he was for Spencer. I thought about it for a second. 

“Lucky girls”, I said, he looked at me confused. “If I had a teacher that looked like you back in college I would show up to every class.”, I said. 

He shook his head while his cheeks turned red. 

“I’m serious, I would even show up to office hours”, I wiggled my eyebrows. “I’m kinda jealous those girls will definitely do that”, I said. 

“I have no eyes for anyone else but you”, he kissed my forehead as a smile drew on my face. 

“So you’ll take the offer?”, I asked after a second. 

“I think that’s the fair thing to do”, he said. 

“What do you mean?”, I asked confusedly looking up at him. 

“I think you don’t deserve to be worried about me all the time… when, when I was in the ambulance I heard everything. All I could think of is you and Abby, I wanted to hold you both and let you know just how much I love my girls”, his adam’s apple bobbed on his throat when his eyes watered. 

“You can do that right now”, I snuggled close to him, wiggling a little so the kid was betweenus. 

His arm pulled us closer, his lips kissing both Abby’s and I’s heads. 

“My girls”, he took a deep breath. 

I hugged them both, with the utmost caution to not put my hand near his wound. 

“I think I can get to like Professor Reid”, A cheeky smile grew on my lips. 

He shook his head again before a smile grew on his too. 

I wanted to stay here in bed snuggling with the two people I loved the most forever. Just because we could, the three of us were here right now, and that’s all that mattered. After a second Spencer fell asleep. Soft snores coming from his slightly opened mouth, Abby sucked on her finger as her chest raised in rhythm. How could anyone get this lucky? 

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ladies and gent, your fluff of the day <3
> 
> Also welcome to my strange obsession, in this show we'll unveil why Professor Reid with plaid wool suits with elbow patches is the reason why I live.


	31. Chapter 31

  
Abby was not a difficult baby at all, most of the time she was actually a calm girl. She liked to talk, and to learn new things, but she did like having things go her way. She was very stubborn when she got in her moods. I liked to blame that on the fact that Spencer always gave her what she wanted, but I knew kids always had their moments. Still, she was dangerously aware that as long as she flashed her eyes to her dad she would get anything. 

“Abigail Reid”, I tried to say as sternly as I could, still amused at the quick thinking of my daughter. She had slid from the couch the moment she saw me walking towards her. 

The kid quickly walked around the couch to stand in front of it, while I stood behind it with my arms crossed. 

“We need to hurry or we’ll be late”, I tried to reason with her, which I knew didn’t work like that. The kid still giggled looking at me powerlessly standing there. 

Of course if I ran I could catch up to her and get her, but I wanted her to come to me instead. She knew that and used it to her advantage. 

“Abigail”, I said slowly when I took a step and she did so too in the other direction. 

“What 's going on?”, Spencer asked walking out of the bedroom, a cardigan slung around his shoulders as he groggily put it on. 

“Your daughter is refusing to take a bath”, I said, pointing at the girl who quickly took off running in his direction. Hugging his leg when he was behind him using him as a shield. 

“Come here”, He bent to pick her up, putting her on his hip. “Is that true Abby, are you giving mommy a hard time?”, he asked softly to the baby. 

She gave him a put before burrowing her head on the crook of his neck. 

“I somehow doubt this angel is giving you a hard time”, he concluded looking at me. 

I bit my lip amusedly trying not to laugh. 

“I’ll give her the bath”, he offered, walking towards me. “You can get ready”, he smiled. 

“Okay, but if you two make any messes I will make you both sleep on the couch tonight”, I warned an empty threat. Still I stood on my toes giving Spencer a kiss on his lips and Abby a kiss on her cheek. 

The kid groaned against his neck and I chuckled lightly. Spencer did so too. 

“Not funny”, I said walking to the bedroom with a smile on my lips. 

I started doing my own make up before I heard the commotion in the bathroom. 

“Abby no”, I heard Spencer say before the sound of water hitting the floor hit my ear. I looked up to the slightly ajar door. Deciding to finish my lipstick before walking. 

Spencer whispered agitatedly something when I walked in, laughing at the scene. He turned around, Abby had her hand on the removable handshower, while Spencer was soaking wet from his head to the middle of his shirt. 

He turned around to see me, making me laugh now. 

“I’ll clean this up”, he said resignedly. 

“Oh you will, do you need help with her?”, I said as the kid slammed her hands against the layer of bubbles, sending them everywhere. 

“No, we are fine”, he turned to see him, the kid smiling. 

“Okay”, I said walking back to the bedroom, where I got ready. A flared black skirt with a white turtleneck. I slid in the tall white boots sitting on the edge of the bed. I looked up to Spencer when he came out with Abby wrapped around a towel. I reached my hands to her and Spencer placed her in my lap. 

“I think you need a shower now”, I joked, his hair was now messy from the drying process. 

“I think I do”, he said looking down at his shirt, the white thin fabric pressed against his skin. 

My eyes wandered his body, landing on his entertained face. 

“Like something you see?”, he asked, I started drying Abby with the towel as the kid tried to squirm away. 

“Oh yeah, very much”, I said casually. 

He huffed and got back in the bathroom. 

Once we were all done I changed Abby into her own dress, I put on a pink long double breasted woven coat. Putting Abby in a coat as well. In perfect timing Spencer came out wearing his suit, trying to fix his tie. The attempt failed when the tie stayed crooked. 

I walked towards him leaving Abby on the floor, the kid started crawling towards her pile of stuffed animals in the corner. My hands tried to fix his tie and once I was satisfied with the straightness I ran my hands through his chest. 

“Are you sure you want to go out today?” I asked him. 

‘Of course I am, he has been inviting us out for over two weeks.”, He said putting both of his hands on my back. Once I had access I placed my hand under his wound. 

A week was not enough time to recover right? 

“Hey”, he called my attention. 

I hummed still not looking at him, my eyes stuck to his side. 

“Look at me”, he said softly, My eyes traveled up to his. 

“I’m here”, he said. My heart shrunk. He was the one that was stabbed and I was the one who worried twenty four seven. 

When I didn’t reply he took my left hand, placing it on his chest, his heart beat was right under my fingertips. He put his own hand on top applying some pressure so that I could feel it better. The rhythmic pumping bringing me a sense of comfort 

“You see? I am here, and I’m not going anywhere.” 

This time when I looked up at him he pulled me in for a kiss. My lips parted slightly to make room for his tongue, which he quickly put to use. 

“Daddy”, Abby said in a complaining tone, the kid had walked next to us and was now pulling on Spencer’s pants. 

We both looked down at her. Spencer picked her up, the kid hugged him by the neck. 

“What’s going on baby?”, he asked when he noticed the pout on her face. She looked over at me before hugging him closer. 

“Oh she wants daddy’s cuddles all by herself”, I explained once I understood the reason for her whining. 

“They are all yours”, he hugged her close, kissing her cheek and making the kid smiled now as she pressed her cheek against him. “I love you”, he said looking at her. 

“Wuv you”, she echoed gleefully. 

I smiled before I grabbed my purse and led the way out. Spencer stopped at the table by the entrance, his face scrunching up when he took a letter. 

“Everything okay dear?”, I said putting on a scarf and doing the same with the baby. 

“My mom answered my letter”, he explained, he had told her what happened in writing, that way the doctors could give it to her when she was having a clear day. 

“Is she angry?”, I asked carefully. 

“The letter starts with Stubborn Spencer Reid”, he said reading quickly the contents. “She says she hopes you put me in my place since. That she is writing to you and if you tell her I’ve been refusing help myself she’ll fly here to make sure I behave”, he said with a slight grimace. 

“I don’t think I want to know Diana Reid angry”, I said. He shook his head quickly, making me laugh. 

Abby was especially clingy today, as I knocked on the door of the house she burrowed her face once more in Spencer’s neck. 

“Good afternoon!”, Rossi said happily, moving aside to let us in. Once we were inside he closed the door. “Hello Abigail”, the man said. 

Abby separated herself enough to see the man, a big smile on her face as she reached her arms for him to grab her. Which he accepted as he took her away from Spencer. 

“How is the most precious angel in the world”, he asked, Abby beamed at his words. “How are you guys”, he asked after, looking at both of us. 

“Good, enjoying the week of rest”, I said. 

“Yeah, you should try to do nothing sometime”, Spencer said, Rossi waved him off while walking to the dining room. 

“I’ll have enough rest later in life, right now I have too many things to do”, he said. 

“I’m with Spencer on this one, you should take some time off”, I said, helping him get Abby on her high chair. 

“I just don’t like doing nothing, I get claustrophobic”, he explained. 

“You know, taking time off work can help with productivity”, Spencer said pulling a chair for me to sit in. 

“Are you implying I’m not productive enough?”, Rossi asked with fake hurt. I chuckled at that while the two men took their seats. 

We had finished dinner and were sitting on the table, laughing at Rossi’s stories. 

“I’m not going to lie, the first two times he said something I wondered if he was actually being accurate or if he was just speaking fast to throw everyone off their rhythm”, Rossi said, making me laugh again. 

“Now imagine living with him”, I said. 

“Hey”, Spencer furrowed his eyebrows, I turned to see him. 

“Oh hush, you know I love your rambling”, I leaned forward as he did the same, placing a chaste kiss on my lips before going back to smiling. 

“All I’m saying is, his students are going to be very confused”, Rossi sipped his drink. 

“I haven’t thought of that”, Spencer said, I could hear his gears turning. “Do you think I shouldn’t do it?”, he looked at Rossi. 

“That’s not what I’m saying at all kid. You are very caring, I’m sure they will love you.”, He reassured him, Spencer just nodded with a pursed smile on his lips. 

“Changing topics”, Rossi said now looking at me. “How is the wedding planning?” 

“Good”, I twisted my lips. 

“Good?”, he asked. 

“Well we asked Derek and Penelope to be best man and maid of honor.”, he nodded. “We also did the budgeting already, well Spencer did I just let him scribble numbers on paper.” 

“It’s not too late to let me pay for it”, Rossi offered. 

I shook my head. 

“The average wedding in DC is around thirty eight thousand dollars”, Spencer told Rossi as he tried to clean the smeared mashed potatoes off the table on the high chair. “With most weddings going over budget by about five thousand. Now I know that amount might not bother you, but that’s too kind of an offer.” 

Abby tried to help him as her hands further dirtied the surface. 

“I know, trust me after three of those I know”, he said, making us both chuckle now. “Still let me at least pay for the wedding dress”, he offered. 

“We are fine I promise”, I reassured him. “Well there is something you can do for us”, I said, looking at Spencer. 

"Anything", he nodded.

Spencer shifted on his seat now, knowing I was about to ask the question that had brought us here in the first place. 

“We are trying to get the wedding party together, you know that way we at least have something ready” 

He nodded looking at us slightly confused. 

“I was wondering, if it’s not too much to ask. Would you walk me down the aisle?”, I asked sheepishly. 

He placed the glass down on the table. Standing up and walking towards me, he pulled me up and hugged me. 

“Of course I will, it’ll be an honor”, he placed a kiss on my template and I smiled. 

“Really?”, I asked happily. 

“Of course I will kiddo”, he sighed pulling me tighter. 

I smiled. 

“Does this mean I need to have a talk with you?”, he asked Spencer, the man who had been smiling widely now looked slightly horrified. “I’m kidding”, he said, pulling me into a hug again. “I’m not, we’ll talk later”, he whispered, mouthing the words at him.   


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter? well yes because i forgot to give you guys this important piece of information!
> 
> Also the formatting on my last chapter was weird I apologize.
> 
> Love you guys! I know these chapters are short but I've been distracted writing longer ones. Like the next one that will include some jealous (y/n) and Spencer :3


	32. Chapter 32

I stirred awake at the tingling feeling of lips on my shoulders. Sloppy kisses making a path to the back of my neck. I grabbed his hand with mine, feeling his fingers quickly unbutton the top of my pajamas, his hand making its way to my breast. I pushed my hips back to be greeted by the bulge on his flannel bottoms, I rocked them earning a raspy breath on my ear. Quickly, and experiencely his hands pulled my bottoms down, my own hands helping him get them to my ankles. With one hand he guided my leg up to his, as I pulled his bottoms down enough. Once we were both ready I spooned closer to him, letting him guide himself inside me. We both moaned lightly at the action. His hips were persistent as his gentle hands traveled my body. I had been so scared of touching him and hurting him in the past two weeks, but this touch was tender and careful as well as needy and passionate. I could hear his labored breath behind me as he burrowed his face on my head, the warmth of his breath sending shivers down my spine. My own hips moved back and forth to meet his, until he put his hand on my hip, nails digging on the skin. His rhythm became vigorous yet somehow kept the softness that it had before. With his own hand that was previously on my hip he guided my hand to my lower stomach. As he applied some pressure to the delicate spot where the tension laid. I felt him shift a little, almost hovering on top of the bed as a moan escaped my mouth. He applied more pressure with our hands as I felt his body shake lightly. My own tension dissipating and sending a thousand butterflies around my body. 

While we regained our breaths we both pulled our pants up. I turned to face him, his face floating on top of mine.

“Good morning”, he said with a raspy voice.

“Good morning”, I dumbly smiled up at him. He pulled his face down to kiss me as I reached up to meet him halfway.

“A really good morning”, he pointed out. “And to think that two years ago today I didn’t know you yet”, he caressed my cheek with the back of his hand.

“I know Doctor Reid. You won the lottery”, I smiled feeling the burning on my cheeks as he saw me with admiration in his eyes.

“I sure did”, he said, laying back down and hugging me.

I eye the alarm clock on his bedside table. “You need to start getting ready”, I pointed out, my finger running through his jawline contradicting my words.

He groaned in response, hugging me closer to him.

“You cannot be late on the first Friday”, I warned him.

“You said that about everyday of the week”, he said in a reminding tone.

“I sure did, because it is a very bad example for the teacher to be late”, I said, placing pointless kisses in his chest.

“Most students are late anyway, I’ve had several walk in the middle of the lecture just to sit on their phones”, he said rubbing my back with his hand under my shirt.

“How dare they”, I gasped, he chuckled. 

After a second of deliberation he pulled away, a pout forming on my mouth as he sat on the bed.

“Don’t go”, I whined.

“You told me I needed to be on time”, he said standing up and walking to the bathroom.

“Yeah that was me about five minutes ago, I was dumber then”, I said. Not really expecting a reply as the water started running. I stretched on the bed, groaning at the way my body creaking. 

“Do not stand up, I’ll grab breakfast on my way to work today”, Spencer popped out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist.

“Oh come on”, I falsely complained as I let my head fall back in the pillows. Pillows that smelled like him, I pulled one between my arms as I closed my eyes again.

After a couple of minutes Spencer came into the room, with his underwear on, as he searched on the cabinets.

I turned to see him.

“At what time is Penelope coming?”, he asked, pulling some clothes out.

“Around noon, that should give us plenty of time”, I said with my eyes following his every movement.

“Okay, make sure Abby has her dinner ready before you leave”, he said absently.

“I know I know, the cake for dinner incident won’t happen again, I said, remembering that time Morgan had the brilliant idea after Abby refused to eat anything else.

Spencer walked back in the bathroom.

“Are you picking me up?”, he asked.

“I will, I’ll try to be there before your lecture ends but I can’t promise anything”, I eyed the baby monitor, where Abby stirred around in her sleep.

“(y/n)”, he said walking to the bed now fully dressed.  
I sat on the bed biting my lip while my eyes wandered his body.

“Do not let Garcia hijack the wedding planning”, he said in a serious manner.

I scoffed before smiling at him. “She won’t, we won’t make any decisions without you, any ideas I like I’ll show you tonight during our date.”

He beamed at the idea leaning forward towards me.

“And then in the hotel I can show you some other ideas”, I pulled him by his tie, making his lips crash with mine.

“That sounds good”, he nodded enthusiastically. Once he stood back up he straightened his tie, eyeing the monitor.

“Can you bring her over? I don’t think any of us will be waking up anytime soon”, I said sweetly, just giving him a chance to wake her up without him feeling guilty.

“Of course”, he said a little too eagerly while he walked to the nursery. 

Once he came back out Abby sleepily hugged him by the neck.

“You are going to behave with aunt Penelope right? Won’t give her any problems?”, he kissed the side of the head as the kid closed her eyes again. “Mommy and I will be back bright and early tomorrow”, He whispered before handing her to me.

The kid barely noticed the change in the environment as she snuggled on my chest.

“She’ll be fine”, I looked up at him.

“I love my girls so much, I’ll see you later”, he smiled softly before heading out. 

I closed my own eyes once I made sure Abby was sound asleep.

With around ten months to go for the wedding I had decided it was time to get serious. I had never thought I would get married, this is something that no one knew, not even Spencer. To love someone to the point of wanting to be legally bound to them seemed crazy. I always thought marriage wasn’t that necessary. Having seen plenty of people raise kids and live their lives without ever going through the process. Of course once I met the Doctor everything changed, I needed to make sure that everyone knew how much I loved him, even the government. Hell I’d marry him in every state if necessary. 

The point is, that since I never had the idea of a wedding in mind, I never had the idea of planning a wedding. So I needed all the help I could get, that help came in the form of the other resident genius of the BAU, who had been excited as soon as I asked her for help. Spencer had been a little more hesitant, he loved the idea of having the woman who was like his sister stand next to me at the altar. Wasn’t a fan of the idea of having Penelope Garcia give us her input. ‘nothing personal’ he had said, but always when she came to his place for movie night and he wanted Chinese if she wanted Indian they were having Indian. I tried hard to not point out the fact that he thought she always got her way, an attribute you could adhere to him as well. I needed the help though, and who else but the maid of honor to do it.

Once I opened the door I realized what I had gotten myself into.

“help me”, she said, I reached to help her with the pile of folders on her arms. Grabbing a couple and balancing the weight in my arms I walked to the dining table placing everything in it. She did the same, slinging her purse that thumped on the table. I eyed her.

“hi!”she said excitedly pulling me in for a hug, I returned it. “Where is the little bundle of joy?”, she asked.

I pointed to the sofa where Abby was now peeking from.

“Hi you little princess”, Penelope ran to Abby who happily let herself be picked up. “How is the most beautiful girl in the whole United States of America and the world?”, she cooed.

“Enny”, the kid said hugging the woman,

“I could just eat her”, Penelope said walking to the table.

“I know right?”,I smiled at them as Penelope took a seat with Abby in her lap.

“Ant Enny”, the kid said, showing her her pink giraffe.

“Now that is one adorable animal”, Penelope beamed down at her.

“Do you want anything to drink?”, I asked.

“Iced coffee?”, she replied in the form of a question.

“With caramel drizzles and vanilla bean powder?”, I asked her, she nodded her head happily.

“I see the eidetic memory thing rubs off”, she said. I pulled the ingredients that I had bought specifically for her drink. “You should also have some coffee, because we are going to need it my friend”, she said.

I fixed both of us drinks as I handed one to her, also placing a sippy cup with apple juice in front of her.

I sat down sipping from my drink as my eyes traveled to the mountain of colored folders.

“Buckle up because we are in for a journey. You may take notes but flash photography is prohibited”, she said taking a sip from her drink, I wondered if I should have gotten decaf.

“Every different folder corresponds to a category, each folder is divided in two sections. The first section are things that I definitely have vendors for and are in season for the wedding day. The second one are things that are in season but I do not have vendors for, but don’t worry because if you like anything from them I will make sure to ship them all the way from Australia if necessary.”, she explained quickly.

“We can stick to the first category”, I nodded.

“Reid told me to not hold anything back, so I am not holding anything back. He told me, and I quote, if she likes something make sure that we get it for the wedding.”, she explained.

I blushed with a smile on my lips. I could hear him say those words which made my heart beat faster.

“Ok so anything you like we'll be adding to the white folders so you and Spencer can look them over later, once it’s decided they will be graduating to the silver glitter folder.”, she said.

I reached for a pink folder, a single page with Garcia’s picture on it. I looked up confusedly.

“That is the bridal folder, everything will be in there. From nails to gown to the brand of champagne we’ll be having before the wedding”, she said my eyebrows shot up, it was good I had gotten her help. “Spencer and Derek have a blue one so do not open it unless you want to ruin the surprise”, she warned.

“Does he know about this one?”, I asked.

“No, and if you want you can either keep it and hide it or I can take it back with me”, I thought about it for a moment.

“I think I’ll keep it, I would like to have references for everything”, I said.

“Okay sounds like a plan, okay let’s start here, with the themes.”, she said opening a folder and handing it to me.

“Are these your own wedding ideas?”, I asked when I saw the width of the folder.

“Oh no, mine are all in the computer, I printed all this because Mr anti technology asked me to, of course everything is in recycled paper”, she explained.

I started flipping through the pages, each one looked like a pinterest board of wedding themes. Raging from the fall nature to the contemporary, to one futuristic looking. As I flipped though she showed me the pros and cons of each one.  
I placed the last of the themes that had caught my attention in the white folder.

“The only category that we will not be running is bachelorette party slash bridal shower, that is all Emily”, she said.

“No strippers”, I said looking at her.

“As I said, that is Em’s job”, she defended herself.

I narrowed my eyes as a cheeky smile appeared on her lips.

“We can do dresses now that you have a general idea of what you want, of course I just have ideas for dresses, you’ll pick some out and then we can show them to the boutiques, I will be booking appointments for a month from now”, she explained. 

I bit my lip nervously.

“We can also look at lingerie”, she said, eyeing Abby who had gotten to her nap on the couch, “Let me warn you that the lingerie will be one of my gifts for you guys. There is no arguing about that, I will make sure you guys come back with another niece or nephew for me from that honeymoon.”

I blushed even more now moving my gaze away. Penelope gasped softly.

“Don’t tell me you are”, I looked at her. 

“Oh no! no no”, I said quickly, she sighed in relief.

“Okay because planning a wedding with a newborn is exhausting, we already have JJ’s to worry about”, she blurted out, my jaw dropped. She mirrored me when she realized what she had said.

“I knew it!”, I smiled.

“Please don’t tell her I told you, she wanted to give the news soon”, she begged.

“I won’t say a word”, I put my hand on my chest.

“But yeah omg we’ll soon have so many babies walking around!”, she said.

I smiled, me and Spencer had agreed to try for another one as soon as we got married, hoping Abby would get a little brother or sister before she turned three. This was something no one needed to know, if anything to avoid someone getting their hopes up. A thousand things could happen but we tried to not think about it.

“Dresses”, I said, she nodded her head, handing me the folder.

“Okay so here”, she handed me another folder, I opened it. Feeling a deja vu at the way the hundred pages overwhelmed my mind. Every dress was beautiful but not nearly as perfect as it needed to be. She gave me her opinion on the ones that I liked and I accepted the critics.

About three hours later she sent me to get a nap.

“Go on, you had a crazy couple of hours and Spencer probably needs you in good shape tonight. I will take care of the bundle of joy”, she said pushing me to the bedroom. I happily accepted the invitation dozing off as soon as my head hit the pillow.

I parked the car in the visitor’s parking lot. Putting the folder in the back seat next to the go back we would need for the night. the white folder wasn’t as thick as I thought it would be by the end of the day, but it had an array of choices. I checked myself in the rear view mirror, hoping out of the car. I could see a couple of eyes on my body as I tied the long black coat on my waist. It hadn’t been the best idea to come to a college campus in the dress I was wearing, but once the coat was on no one could suspect a thing. I had chosen to wear a silk short body-con dress, the fabric slightly scrunched up and a slit on the leg. It barely covered what needed to cover but it still managed to look classy. I walked to the building, reading the instructions on my phone. I was too happy to see him, we both needed a date especially on an occasion such as today. Today two years ago Spencer had walked into the school where I taught, and I was about to call the cops on him. A story I was saving for the wedding. I opened the doors to the auditorium, in the bottom Spencer walked around talking about whatever they were learning. I took a seat in the very back. Eyeing my clock. Only twenty minutes left, Spencer did not notice my presence, too busy answering questions from the crowd. He kept explaining how the upbringing of many of the criminals they discussed was the ultimate trigger for their actions, making sure to emphasize that not all people with rough backgrounds end up becoming criminals.

“Remember, your assignment on cognitive behavioral therapy is due Monday. If any of you have any questions relating to that the always kind Miss Stone will be posting everything on the board, she will be answering questions as well. Everyone have a great weekend” Spencer said, pointing to the other woman I had not noticed on the floor with him, she waved at the crowd as she typed something on the computer. The students started collecting their belongings, walking out of the auditorium as they discussed their weekend plans.

The always kind Miss who now? Spencer had referred to his TA only as Charlie. I had assumed it probably was a early twenties student with an affinity for serial killers. He had not corrected me when I misgendered her though, letting me ask him about him.

‘Oh yeah, Charlie is very nice. Helped me a ton on the first day’

He had said. Now it made sense why he didn’t correct me. The charlie that walked to him was nothing like I pictured him. For starters I didn’t think Charlie was going to be wearing a too tight pencil skirt. Or that his blonde curled hair was going to come down to her waist. She walked towards Spencer as a couple of kids approached to ask questions. She sure was very confident standing next to him, She was almost as tall as him but she was wearing heels. I crossed my arms leaning back on the hard bench.

“Hey”, a kid said smoothly, looking at me.

“Hey…”, I said, narrowing my eyes.

“I haven’t seen you on campus before”, he said.

“Not a student”, I showed him the ring on my finger. He quickly changed postures.

“Have a nice day”, he nodded. I shot him a smile.

There was someone else that needed to see the ring on my finger, and she was now standing next to my fiance, her hand on his shoulder as she laughed. He didn’t seem to mind, good thing he was a germaphobe who didn’t like strangers touching him. I bitterly thought, when the last couple of kids made their way out Spencer started conversing with Charlie. I walked down the stairs slowly, doing my best to keep calm. His eyes shifted at my direction, a smile sprawling across his face.

“(y/n)”, he said happily. No defensive posture, no nervousness, no high pitch voice. Not even when the woman was rubbing his forearm a second ago.

“Spencer”, I said in a more hissy tone.

“(y/n), this is Charlie, Charlie, this is (y/n), my fiance”, he explained.

“So nice to meet you (y/n), Doctor Reid has told me so much about you”, she said in her English accent. Because of course the tall perfectly sculpted woman, with the blonde hair who was rocking her bangs also had an English accent.

“Nice to meet you too”, I shook her hand.

“You are even more beautiful than what he described”, she said smiling.

“You are too, actually I pictured you a lot different”, I could see the confusseness in Spencer.

“Well if you excuse me I will be heading out, you two have a lovely evening. I will be seeing you Monday Doctor Reid”, she said a lot more coyly than what I would like, of course she had confidence too! What would be surprising?

My smile disappeared and a tight grin posted on my mouth. “Such a lovely woman”, I said. turning to see Spencer who had collected everything from the desk already.

“She is great”, he nodded trying to keep a monotone voice. “You look gorgeous”, he smiled.

I tried to ignore the way my cheeks were already threatening to blush. I had to send a message to my knees for them to stop shaking as his gaze ran through my body, we are mad at him right now.

“Let’s go to my office, I need to leave everything there”, He said while walking out.

“Sure”, I said following him. 

“How was everything today?”, he asked to unlock the door for his office, he started tidying everything up.

“It was fine”, I answered distantly. “How old is she?”, I asked.

He narrowed his eyes looking at me. “Who?”, he asked, slightly confused.

“Charlie”, I explained.

“Around your age I suppose”, he replied shrugging his shoulders. I don’t know why but a buzz rang through my head like if he had given the wrong answer in family feud.

“She is very pretty”, I said crossing my arms, putting emphasis on the word very.

“She is an attractive woman”, he turned attentively to see me. Another loud buzz in my brain, one more and you are out. His eyes studying my stance. “What 's going on?” He asked.

“Nothing, just I didn’t think she was a woman”, I explained defensively. “You didn’t correct me when I said he”, I said.

“I didn’t?”, he asked in a pensive thought. Another buzz, Mister Eidetic memory and he thinks I’ll buy he forgot. I was about to become one of those Unsubs he talks so much about.

“I mean if you had told me she was a woman, a very attractive woman…”, I said quoting him.

“Are you jealous?”, he asked in an amused tone. 

“No, not at all Reid, I just think is interesting”, I said.

“Interesting?”, he asked slowly, taking a step towards me, I took a step back. My back sadly pressed now against a bookshelf. He walked closer to me, putting his hands on either side of my body. “What’s interesting?”, he asked, dangerously close to my face.

Did this room lack oxygen? I took a deep breath.

“That you didn’t mention the attractive woman who feels confident in flirting with you”, I said, as brave as I could. My confidence shook when I saw the way he eyed my lips.

“He is an objectively attractive woman, no one can deny that”, he nodded. 

My blood boiled, but I was unable to move.

“But I just happen to not pay attention to that”, one hand came to my coat, slightly pulling on the fabric, his eyes following the skin as it appeared, very happy to see the cleavage that seemed to never end. “Instead focusing on other things”

“Other things?”, I asked shakily. 

“Yeah, I happen to be very much in love with another woman”, he mentioned casually, his fingers trailing on the now exposed skin, leaving a trail of goosebumps on the way. 

“The mother of my child”, he placed a kiss on my lips. “Future wife”, he placed another one, my lips trying to follow him when he pulled back. “Love of my life”, he said, now giving me a more hasty kiss. His teeth pulling lightly on my bottom lip as he pulled away. 

I was left there panting against the bookshelf. My mouth slightly open trying to regain my breath.

“And she has nothing to worry about, because no other woman will ever come close to owning me as much as she owns me.”

Now that made my heart fly. I hugged him by the neck, as he looked amused at the quick change in attitude.

“You just have a way with words Doctor”, I tried to explain myself. “But next time she openly flirts with you I will definitely conspire with Penelope to do something”, I tried to sound threatening.

“She doesn’t flirt”, he said, narrowing his eyes.

Of course he couldn’t be so oblivious right?

“Whatever you say Doctor Reid”, I rolled my eyes.

He placed his hands on my sides smiling. Pulling us both back to his desk, where he reached a hand back to grab something. He handed me the bouquet of pink roses. I blushed accepting it.

“I love you”, he reminded me.

“I love you too”, I said taking a breath of the fresh scent. 

“We need to get to that hotel right away”, he said, I looked down to where his eyes were, the skin of my chest still exposed.

“Let’s get going then”, I nodded, taking his hand.

I let the dead weight that was called my body fall in the soft hotel bed. Spencer did the same, laying next to me. When my whole body stopped feeling like I was run over by a steam locomotive I turned to see him. He hugged me close to him. My leg flying on top of his. The sweat in our bodies rubbing against each other.

“Now you see why you have nothing to worry about? I’m yours”, he said. 

I smiled at that. It had been a miracle we didn’t jump each other’s bones in the restaurant. At one point I was sure the waitress saw my foot traveling up his leg. Penelope was going to kill us when we showed up the next morning and we had nothing picked, or even discussed.

Spencer started running his hands in my small back, slowly going down.

“Wait”, I said, he stiffed at the word looking down at me with some concern.

“Tomorrow morning when we wake up, we need to go over the folder”, I said. 

Once he nodded and made sure it was okay he pulled me on top of him. My knees bent on either side of him.

“I can’t promise anything”, he said, pulling me down for a kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had the day off today so I decided to work on another chapter, hope you guys don't mind three updates in 24 hours but I was bored today.
> 
> I hope everyone has a great weekend, love you guys.


	33. Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who ordered the domestic Spencer with a side of Spencer wearing an apron?
> 
> Okay two things, first if you haven't tried alfajores please do!   
> second, I will accept 0 criticism when I say that song from Princess and the Frog is one of the best Disney has.
> 
> Love you guys so much, have a good weekend and thank you for reading!

The house was filled by music playing softly in the background, and the tiny feet of Abby running around. From my position on the dining table I could see her running from the nursery to the living room, where Spencer was. He sat crossed legged in the chair while grading some papers. His eyes quickly ran through the page as the red pen came down every now and then to make annotations. The speed at which his finger coursed through the paper was impressive to say the least, his lips mouthing a few words. I saw Abby run to the nursery one more time, this time coming out with the two pink toy phones. I sipped from my tea amused at the way she placed one on top of the paper Spencer was reading. His eyes came up to meet her, with a bright smile on his face he put the papers aside, taking his glasses off as well. 

It was instances like this in which the impossible happened, and I loved him even more. I remember how JJ told me the group had discussions before, about how good of a dad Spencer would be in the future. Still they had no idea how good he was. Even when he had been awake since early, gone to work and came back with more work he did not think twice to join Abby in her games. Granted he only had two lectures on Thursdays, so he’s normally home before two. 

He seemed to be liking his new job, and I did too. I wouldn’t tell him that straight away though. A month ago when he was supposed to leave his position and go back to the Bureau and he offered to stay and finish the semester I had stayed quiet. Then he had a meeting with his old unit chief from where he worked the money laundering case, nothing had been mentioned since. I especially wouldn’t mention the fact that I listened to a conversation I was not supposed to. One in which Aaron came to check on him, and when I left the room I heard him say something about the lines of ‘I think it’s time Hotch, it’s what they deserve’. Part of me knew Spencer would never leave his job, not fully. Which was proven every time the team called him for help, and he absolutely accepted, offering his advice or giving them some input. It was okay though, and I did not want to push him because deep down I knew he himself didn’t know what he’d do. As for me, I had taken to tutoring Jack with math, he had some problems at the beginning of the year and Aaron asked me to do it. There was no way I could say no the kid was all a gentleman and a sweetheart. 

Spencer’s voice pulled me down to earth

“Do I have a call?”, he asked, before he could get an answer Abby walked to the other side of the living room, pressing one of the buttons on her own phone.

Spencer picked the phone up bringing it to his ear. “This is Doctor Reid”, he answered in a professional tone.

Abby said some intangible words on the receiver.

“Oh I see”, he nodded solemnly, I bit my lip at the seriousness of his face.

Abby continued babbling, some words seemed familiar but most of them were gibberish filled with giggles. It was surprising that she had this energy in the afternoon, especially if we consider that everyone had been woken up at five AM.

I put my mug down, joining them in the living room and sitting on the couch. Spencer stood up and came to sit next to me.

“I see”, he nodded again, putting a finger up at me and covering the speaker up with his shoulder. “The princess”, he explained quietly.

I nodded my head with understatement.

Abby’s babbling got louder, trying to get his attention again.

“I’m here”, he said, putting the phone back to his ear. “oh that sounds wonderful!”, he chirped. “Give me a second, there is someone else who wants to speak with you”, he said. Now he handed me the phone, I put it in my ear but before I could say something Abby stood up and came running to us.

“No, Daddy”, she frowned, trying to reach the phone.

“Oh is this a call for daddy?”, I asked.

“Daddy”, she said, I handed her the phone which she gave back to Spencer.

I chuckled at the way she seemed satisfied and got back to her previous spot. Speaking some more in the receiver.

“Abby”, Spencer said loud enough for the kid to look over at him. “I love you so much pumpkin”, he said.

“Wuv you”, she said smiling, she babbled some more before losing attention on the phone, leaving it there and going back to the nursery.

“I think she hung up”, Spencer said, hanging the phone up and placing it on the table.

“She might have more important business to attend to”, I said, he nodded, bringing my legs up to his lap. I reclined on the armrest smiling. He ran his fingers in my leg as I closed my eyes happily.

We watched as she came back running in the living room, this time with as many stuffed animals as she could, dropping them on the floor as she went back in the nursery.

“Oh no”, I said the second time she repeated the action.

“Are you doing some remodelations?”, I asked, she ignored me, bringing even more toys into the living room.

“We need to tell Garcia to stop buying her stuff”, Spencer frowned slightly at the growing pile of toys on the floor,

“Abby”, I called the kid, this time when she came back she sat on the floor in front of a pile. Pulling out a cat that meows every time you pressed its paw. She brought it to her ear, giggling at the sound coming from the little black animal. She leaned forward to grab another one, this time yawning as she did.

“Someone is tired”, Spencer pointed out.

“Abby, do you want to take a nap?”, I asked her, the kid whose eyes were halfway close shook her head no.

“I do want to take a nap”, Spencer yawned, stretching his arms. “I’m so tired”, he said dramatically.

The kid yawned again after seeing her father. She thought about it for a second, weighing her two options. On one hand she had just opened toys r us in the living room, on the other hand she could take a nap with her dad.

She tumbly stood up, walking to the nursery and coming back a couple of seconds later, with her blanket on her hands.She tried to climb on his lap, not amused that my legs were on her favorite napping spot.

“Mommy”, she complained trying to move my legs with her tiny hands.

“Abby”, Spencer said cautiously. “Don’t be mean to mommy”, he warned.

The kid frowned again, looking over at me with a pout.

“Please mommy”, I said.

“Peash mommy”, she batted her eyelashes at me.

“Now those words I listen to”, I said sitting down, picking her up and placing her between both of us, our bodies leaning towards her. 

The kid handed me the small blanket for me to tuck her in. I got it around her body, tucking the edges between our bodies for her to take her nap. She had been awake since too early today so it wasn’t a surprise she needed her sleepy time. Doctor Arya had warned us about the tantrums that start at 16 months, but she did not tell us Abby would wake up screaming at five AM, and of course once she was fully awake no one was safe.

Spencer’s fingers ran through the side of her chubby cheeks as the kid started closing her eyes. I stopped the music from my phone as her breathing became rhythmical again. At one point she shifted, laying on my lap. I pulled her up carefully. Laying on the couch with my head in Spencer’s lap and Abby laying on top of me. 

He smiled widely before fetching a blanket and covering us both. 

“Finish your work”, I instructed. He nodded.

“In a second”, His fingers slid across my face before doing the same in Abby’s. “Anyone who says she looks more like me than you is wrong”, he concluded.

“She does”, I pointed out, because it was the truth.

“Not like this”, he shook his head. “Right now you two look so much alike, like two beautiful porcelain dolls, too delicate and precious for this world”, he sighed. I smiled snuggling Abby closer to me.

After a second he took the papers and continued his work, being mindful of my head as he balanced a book in the air to be able to annotate the homework.

My eyelids grew heavy as he with one hand brushed my hair gingerly. I let the slumber pull me in knowing we were both in the safest place we could be.

When I woke up a while later neither Spencer nor Abby were on the couch with me. Instead I was hugging a sea lion stuffed animal, and my head rested on a horse one. I blinked and looked around. The living room was completely clean again. I sat up and turned to where some noises were coming.

“Hey”, I yawned, walking to the kitchen Where Spencer stood wearing an apron, Abby had a smaller one on while she sat on the counter. 

“You are not supposed to be awake”, Spencer furrowed his eyebrows.

“What are you guys doing?”, I asked, walking towards them, with several things on the counter and a book on Spencer’s hands.

“I’m making what I assume are your favorite cookies?”, he said, showing me the book on his hands. “based on your handwriting, the text is centered and the letters are neat and curly, so I guess you wanted to make sure this recipe was clear and pretty.”, he explained.

I walked closer to where he was, peeking to the page.

“That’s not mine, it’s my mom’s. It was her recipe book”, I said, Spencer seemed surprised.

“You guys have strikingly similar handwriting.”, he seemed a little disappointed that he could not recognize my handwriting. “She must have kept this well taken care of because it doesn’t look old or worn down, except for a few paces”, he said with a hint of respect on his voice.

I decided to avoid telling him she wrote it for me before she died. Just nodding my head with a tight smile, and changing the subject.

“You are right though, alfajores are my favorite cookies”, and how couldn’t they be? The crumbly soft cookie with milk caramel filling? Yum. 

That seemed to satisfy him.

Abby who was previously liking her fingers looked at me, as if she just realized I was with them.

“Mommy”, she said, extending her arms at me. I smiled hugging her.

“You need help?”, I looked at him as he tried to follow the exact measurements. 

“Yes please”, he said, I put Abby down on the counter, walking and getting my own apron.

Spencer started putting the flour and cornstarch while I creamed the butter and sugar. Abby had an empty plastic bowl and a whisk and was trying to imitate my actions. I cracked the eggs, mixing them with the other ingredients. Abby, who had abandoned her task, reached for an egg shell, throwing it into the dry ingredients bowl and sending flour directly to Spencer’s face.

I laughed at the way he barely had time to close his eyes.

“Doctor Reid”, I said seriously, he looked over at me. “I think you have something in there”, I pointed at his nose.

“Haha”, he mocked, taking the eggshells out and putting them on the other side. 

I did not see what the smaller bowl contained until I saw his hand traveling to my nose. The caramel sauce.

“Mrs Reid”, he said in my previous tone. “You have something there”

“Very funny”, I said, trying not to laugh. Somehow in our childsplay we forgot the actual child, who in a second, flipped the bowl off the table. My arm reached to grab it, saving its contents, still flour dust flew around us.

Abby was unbothered by the action, instead taking the whisk again and putting it into the butter mixture.

We both laughed, dusting our aprons as I handed him the ingredients.

“What are we having for actual dinner?”, I asked him, cleaning the counter.

“I don’t know, Spaghetti and meatballs?”, he asked.

“Sure, do you want to make the pasta?”, I asked him, as he rolled the dough, cutting them in little stars and placing them in the baking tray.

“I’ve never made pasta from scratch”, he said, placing both trays in the oven.

“It’s actually very easy, only three ingredients.”, I shrugged.

“How do we roll it? We don’t have a pasta roller, like the one Rossi has”, he said handing Abby a sippy cup with juice.

“We don’t need one, you can put those arms of yours to good use”, I joked, he rolled his sleeves crossing his arms.

“You are just very funny right now”, he said, still he took the flour bag again. “Is it really that easy?”He asked.

I nodded my head. I was wrong though, because before at least there was a bowl stopping Abby from sticking her hands on the flour. As soon as she did tears pooled in her eyes. 

“Mommy”, she complained with her own body, showing me her hands.

“Well that is really unfortunate, but you did it yourself”, I said, taking the rag from Spencer’s shoulder and cleaning her hands. She inspected her hands, showing them to me again as I tried to get all of the flour out.

“Come here”, I said, picking her up as Spencer started rolling the dough.

“How thin does this need to be?”, he asked.

“Very, unless you want to eat uncooked pasta”, I said, starting to prepare the sauce and putting Abby down. She paddled around the kitchen now, trying to find something more interesting to do.

I took the chance to put the water to boil and to drop the premade meatballs in the sauce. Taking the trays out of the oven. I placed the cookies in a cooling rack as I turned and walked to where Spencer was clearly struggling while rolling the dough.

“Thinner”, I pointed out, Spencer applied pressure with the roller.

“Like that?”, he asked.

“Perfect, now fold it a couple of times”, I moved my hand in the direction he needed to fold. He did so, using enough flour so that the dough wouldn’t stick to itself.

Abby came back with my phone in her hand now, handing it to me. I understood what she wanted. I selected a playlist we both liked, putting it in shuffle as I won’t say (I’m in love) started playing in the speakers. She bounced on her feet as I picked her up.

I sat Abby back on the counter once I wiped it, putting some caramel sauce in the piping bag. With my finger I scooped some and tasted it, rolling my eyes at the delicious taste. I dipped the finger again, giving some to Abby. The kid took my hand and licked my finger carefully, her hazel eyes growing wide when she felt the taste. I placed the bowl in front of her, taking her index finger carefully I dipped it in the bowl. The kid looked in awe as she started to lick it. I used the distraction to start putting the caramel in between the cookies.

“We just need to wait for the pasta to cook in the sauce”, Spencer said, coming from behind me and grabbing the towel from the counter, cleaning his hands. I piped some caramel on my finger offering to him. He leaned forward and tasted it, humming happily.

“Those look good”, he said when I finished the last cookie.

“They are, but no dessert until dinner is done, we don’t want to set any dangerous precedents”, I eyed Abby, who was very interested in the pile of cookies.

Spencer chuckled, turning around to the stove once more.

As I covered the cookies with a clean towel a new song started playing on the speakers. I smiled widely picking Abby up, the kid recognized the song too as her face turned to the ceiling where the music was coming from.

“Mama, I don’t have time for dancing”, I said in cue with the song. I started swinging softly with the kid on my arms. She smiled at me.

I hoped back in when the music started getting faster.

“But I know exactly where I’m going.. I’m getting closer, closer everyday”, I sang, now fully dancing with Abby in my arms. The kid giggled hugging herself closer to me as I spun around and leaned forward making her head slightly fall back. She laughed wholeheartedly as I moved my feet to the beat of the song.

“People down here think I’m crazy but I don’t care”, I sang with tiana as the girl’s eyes started rolling around a little. I laughed putting her on the floor.

She lost her balance, falling on her butt but still clapping excitedly from the adrenaline rush. I saw as Spencer crossed his arms smiling, leaning against the counter. I walked towards him offering my hand, he reluctantly took it. Placing a hand on my waist and taking my own hand with the other one I continued dancing.

I continued singing while we danced to the rhythm of the jazz. The song continued, dying slowly at the final melody.

Spencer hugged me closer to him, laughing now. I placed a kiss on his lips as Abby clapped again. He bended to get the kid, bringing her up with him now, and using the arm that was previously around me to pull me closer, embracing both of us. I smiled hugging them both as well, before we heard the sizzling sound of the stove. I quickly pulled away to remove the pan from the heat source.

I saw as he opened his mouth.

“I love you”, I beat him to it, he just narrowed his eyes at me as I smiled victoriously.

“I love you”, he said, placing a kiss on my head. “And I love you”, he placed another one in Abby’s cheek.

“I’m going to assume she won again?”, I asked Spencer, when he came back in the bedroom with Abby in his arms. 

She sucked on her thumb while her head rested on his chest.

“She just looked really sad”, he pouted.

“Of course she did”, I said, still I moved aside for him to put the girl in the middle.

Judging by the book on her hands she didn’t even give her dad time to read the bedtime story before convincing him to let her sleep with us. I took the book from her hands handing it to Spencer once he laid next to us.

“Which one are we reading tonight?”, I asked, turning off my bedside lamp and hugging Abby close to me. 

“The frog prince”, he said, taking his glasses and laying sideways.

“Of course”, I smiled, not surprised by her choice.

“Once upon a time there was a Princess. Many a suitor came to the palace to win her hand in marriage, but it seemed to the Princess that each one of them looked at her without really seeing her at all.”

Spencer started the story, both Abby and I listened intently.

Before the story was done the kid was softly snoring in my arms. Spencer dimmed the light down, putting everything on the table and laying back down.

I smiled at him, a gesture which he reciprocated. This feeling had become so familiar lately. As we both smiled lovingly at each other, with the proof of our love sleeping peacefully in between us. There was no need for the three little words, because as our eyes closed we both knew they were right here with us.


	34. Chapter 34

“I’ll never find a wedding dress”, I said, letting my body fall on the couch. Penelope handed me a glass of Champagne which I gulped down without much thought. She refilled it with some impression on her face.

“I think that’s a bit dramatic”, JJ said, as she and Emily shared a piece of the cake we were offered.

“No, we’ve been looking for a month, and I haven’t felt the wow yet”, I said disappointed. There had been beautiful dresses, but nothing that made me want to cry, and I had seen Say Yes To the Dress many times to know how it should look like.

“Well you can always call off the wedding”, Emily said casually, I sat up sending her a very concerned look. “Maybe this is a sign of the universe that you and him shouldn’t get married”, she shrugged.

Oh I know what she was trying to do, Spencer did that to me when I was in my indecisive moods. She thought she could reverse psychology me, which was working to some extent. At least I understood what she wanted to say, of course the dress wasn’t as important as the actual meaning of the dress.

JJ shook her head, leaning forward and grabbing my hand. “(y/n)... You will look beautiful in any dress you choose. You just need to relax and think about what you want, what you really want”, she said, her voice soothing me.

“You just need to remember what this day is sweetie. It’s all about you and him and the love you share… and cake”, Penelope chirped happily at the last word. I smiled as she rubbed my back lightly.

The advisor came in with two big gowns again, I looked at her apologetically for what I was about to do. I stood up before she could talk.

“Can we reset?”, I said, she looked at me confused. We had come on three different occasions and she had been extremely helpful.

“You don’t want to see our princess gowns?”, she asked just to make sure she was hearing me correctly. 

I understood her confusion, given that every time I walked in I was all dolled up with my own dresses.

“Can we try… less?”, I told her. “I mean something less”, I extended my hands. “Something simpler”, I finally found the words.

“Are you sure that’s what you want?”, Penelope asked me, as the entourage stood up.

“Yes”, I nodded with a smile. “Less everything, I still want it to be like the description but we can tone it down with everything else”, I said.

“You got it”, Emily said, as everyone exited the area.

I grabbed the champagne, sitting down again. It was about us… about us…

About ten minutes later everyone came back in, with different dresses in their hands. The advisor quickly placed them on a rack. I started looking them over, at this point and after trying thirty dresses all of them mixed in my brain, until my eyes landed on a specific one. 

“I want to try this one”, I turned around, everyone was looking at me expectedly.

“Let’s do it”, the advisor opened the curtain for me to step in the dressing room. 

After she helped me slip in the dress she guided me back out. The thing with bridal shops is that they don’t have mirrors inside, you have to step on the platform to see the gown. As soon as I walked out I could see the positive reaction of the girls.

“Wow…”, Penelope’s eyes watered, as JJ grabbed her hand. Probably wanting her to calm down and see my own reaction.

I stepped in the platform, turning around to see the dress and… Instant tears, I could see it, me walking to the altar wearing this dress. Walking to Spencer as he waited for me… 

I tried to speak my approval but a sob escaped my mouth, that’s when the girls stood up to surround me.

“You look beautiful”, Emily smiled brushing my hair.

“I love it”, JJ said, feeling the fabric of the skirt.

Penelope looked at me through my reflection in the mirror. Her eyes were waiting for me to say the words.

“Before you said anything!”, she said quickly when my mouth opened. She hushed the other two women and turned to grab something, delicately she placed a veil in my head. The fabric floating around me.

“This is my dress”, I nodded as more tears came out. The three of them hugged me in celebration. 

When I got home I tried to make as little noise as possible, in case Abby was taking her nap right now. I took my boots out, holding them with my hand as I walked to the room. The nursery’s door was open which confirmed my suspicions. I checked on her as the kid curled up on her blanket. One of the sides of the crib had come off a couple of weeks ago, when we realized it was safer for her to nap without it. We couldn’t risk it after that one time she tried to climb the side before falling back on the soft mattress. I smiled, making my way to the living room once I left my shoes in the bedroom. Spencer read a book, his eyes traveled to me when I stood next to the couch.

My hands behind my back as I rocked lightly on my heels.

“Hi”, I smiled at him, he narrowed his eyes, putting the book down on the coffee table.

“Hi…”, he said warily. “What’s going on?”, he asked.

“Nothing is going on…”, I said, making my way in front of him. He grabbed my hand and pulled me to his lap. I sat facing him with one leg on each side of his body.

He studied my face, his own head slightly crooked as he tried to make sense of my expression.

“Are you profiling Dr Reid?”, I asked once he didn’t say anything.

“I am”, he confirmed, surprising me a little by his bluntness.

“Am I being suspected of anything”, I said, running my hands under his cardigan.

He narrowed his eyes, a hand traveling to my chin where he moved my head to the side. With his thumb he pulled down on my bottom lip. I could see the gears turning in his head. It made me wonder how no other girl had snatched him before. Because when he was on his deep thoughts the man was nothing short of an adonis.

“You chew on the left side of your lip when you have something you are keeping to yourself. You did that a lot when we went to Vegas and you were pregnant, I didn’t know it back then. You also did that a lot when you wanted to ask me about cases and I was quiet”, he pointed out.

So he did know I wanted to ask him stuff. I didn’t let the thought bother me too much, instead choosing to put a pin on it for later.

“You also didn’t come straight away to me, which you always do after checking on Abby. I do it too, that’s why my satchel always ends up here in the living room. But you took off your boots today, and left them in the bedroom instead of taking them off here.”, he said, running his hands through my legs. “Which is a shame”, he added.

“Why would that be a shame?”, I asked coyly, knowing the answer already. I needed him to be distracted from the topic as soon as possible.

“Because you look good in them”, he mentioned casually. “Although you look very cute today without them anyway”, he ran his hands through the sides of my thighs. “You are a beautiful woman (y/n)

I looked down at my outfit. A button up shirt under a black sweater, both tucked in a plaided pink skirt. It looked very schoolgirl, but the knee high black boots complimented the outfit very well.

“And what do you do when a beautiful woman sits on your lap”, I purred in his ears, trailing kisses from his ear through his jawline. 

He sighed, his hands traveled under my skirt, the thin lace material of my underwear didn’t stop his hands from continuing his path to my hips. His fingers quickly slipped under the material playing with the elastic a little. I ran my hands through his hair, pulling the curls from the root.My hips rocked against his as his lips landed on my neck, sucking the sensitive skin. I breathed out a moan at the sensation. That was enough for him to suck harder on the skin, eliciting a yelp from me.

“Mommy?”, The small voice came from behind me. 

My body launched at Spencer’s side sitting on the couch ungracefully. Spencer pulled a cushion quickly onto his lap. Our faces flush and our hairs a mess. 

“Abby”, I said, as the kid walked towards us.

The kid rubbed her eyes as I pulled her to my lap. Hugging her but looking at the very mortified Spencer.

“Hey baby”, I kissed the side of her head. “How are you?”

She rubbed her eyes again snuggling on my chest. 

We sat there, both adults uncomfortable and kid unaware of what was happening.

After a second it was safe for Spencer to move, the kid lifted her head from my chest to look at her daddy.

“Hi pumpkin, did you sleep well?”he asked, clearing his throat a little. Abby just tilted her head. “Hey why don’t we show mommy what we did today?”, he asked, the kid nodded her head enthusiastically.

She wiggled away to the floor before running to the nursery.

I turned to Spencer with my lips sucked in. His eyes were wide.

“Oh God… what if we scarred her for life?”, he whispered.

“That’s dramatic”, I said.

“No, what if she… oh God”, he ran his hands through his hair.

I couldn’t resist but to chuckle as Abby came back to the living room.

“Mommy ook”, she showed me two pages, in one her little hands and in the other one her little hand next to Spencer’s.

“Oh my goodness!” I exclaimed, pulling her to my lap. “These are so good! Did you and daddy do this when I was away?”, I asked, she nodded her head. “Well we should definitely put these up in the fridge don’t you think Spencer?”

The man seemed a little distracted from the embarrassment now.

“Absolutely”, he nodded, I stood up with the kid on my arms and we both walked to the kitchen. Spencer taking a magnet and hanging both paintings on.

We smiled, her very first artwork.

I turned to see Abby as she concentrately looked at my neck.

“Are you okay?”, I asked the kid. She brought her little hand to my neck.

“Mommy ouchie?”, she asked confusedly. My jaw dropped, the skin was probably red on the spot Spencer had sucked earlier. 

We had explained to Abby that daddy was ‘ouchie’ after being stabbed, it had helped her know why he couldn’t pick her up for long periods of time. She had ‘ouchie’ herself once when her finger got caught in a book.

I turned to look at Spencer as the colors left his face.

“Come here”, I snickered, sitting on the bed and patting his side.

“What if she saw something?”, he whispered yell.

“Babe she didn’t see anything”, I rolled my eyes.

“She could have. Maybe she doesn’t understand right now but when she’s older… oh God”, he saw on the edge of the bed, his back to me. 

I crawled on the bed towards him, running my hands from his shoulders to his chest.

“Do you remember anything that you saw when you were sixteen months old?”, I asked him, he started thinking about it. “Ok don’t answer that, my point is, she is fine she probably thinks we were playing or something.”, I said. “She’ll forget by tomorrow morning”

“You really think so? There are people who claim to have some form of recollection of their memories since they were four months old, and although experts differ on the specific age a lot of kids can suppress memories from very early.”, he started speaking fast.

“Fine, we are never having sex then”, I said, pulling my hands quickly, I went back to my side, sitting back down as he turned in disbelief. “What?, We cannot risk giving Abby more traumas”, I said shrugging my shoulders as I opened my book.

He took the book away from my hands as he climbed in bed and positioned himself on top of me.

“Are you turning the tables on me Ms (y/l/n)”, he asked slowly.

“I’m just sparing you some awkwardness.”, I replied looking defiantly into his eyes. 

“You know I’m starting to remember why we were in that position in the first place”, He said, his voice dropping a little as his pupils dilated.

“Which is…?”

“You found the dress”, he said.

My jaw dropped, opening my mouth and closing it a couple of times.

“That’s enough of an answer”, He nodded with a bright smile as his lips met mine.

It was on me for dating a profiler. I replied to the kiss eagearly, knowing we were both imagining each other in the clothes we’ll be wearing that day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! this is my way of saying have a good week.
> 
> I hope everyone likes the short chapter, also I hope everyone missed good old Johnny boy because this week he might pay a visit...


	35. Chapter 35

I stood in front of Spencer crossing my arms and looking away. He fidgeted with the band of his satchel a little, still unsure as to why I had walked to the door to say goodbye. The silence was numbing as we both tried to look away from each other. Finally he sighed, I met his eyes. His eyes were surrounded by dark circles and puffy. I bet mine were equally as bad. He extended his hand at me, his fingers slightly shaking, I took his hand and let him pull me in a hug. A bear hug and embraced me and warmed my slightly cold body. He kissed my head.

“We’ll talk when I get back, I promise”, he said.

When we both pulled away I crossed my arms and nodded.

“I love you”, he said slowly and as clearly as possible.

“I love you too Spencer”, I said.

When we were both satisfied with our farewells he exited the house. I sighed closing my eyes and letting my head feel the aching now.

To any outsiders our lives were perfect, perfect young couple with a beautiful home and beautiful daughter. The reality of life is nothing is perfect, nothing is as good or as bad as it seems. Sometimes it’s just complicated. This was one of those times.

Abby had been extremely fussy lately, so much that she was barely getting any sleep. We had taken her to the doctor’s at night a couple of days ago, they were sure she was just in a bad mood and all we could do is trust she was in the best hands. That didn’t mean Spencer or I stopped worrying for a second. He had been reading book after book trying to find an answer. I had stayed awake with her the whole time she was, right by her side. The reality of motherhood was that I had barely any time to take a shower, at this point my hair was greasy and I was wearing one of Spencer’s shirts that I had gotten on the day before. What truly worried us wasn’t that she was fussy, all kids were from time to time it was part of the package. The thing was that she had been really quiet, instead of waking up and demanding attention she stayed sitting down on her crib not making a sound. The kid who would babble until she ran out of saliva just stayed quiet while being altogether absent. It hadn’t been until yesterday that we had gotten her to giggle and play with us. Both of us were relieved that our little girl seemed to be back, she even slept all night this time. 

Still peacefully asleep as I made my way to the nursery to check on her. 

But then there was Spencer. I tried to understand how his life had been nothing but challenges up to this point, and even now there were some. I tried my hardest to give him time to come to me, to tell me what was happening in that head of his. It’s just sometimes he was so… obtuse, to be a genius he did have a hard head. He had gotten a lot better at coming to me when something was bothering him. Most of the time all I could do is try and soothe the sorrows away. He had confessed a while back that he thought if he came to me with his problems I would grow tired of him, which was ridiculous. I loved him and I needed him to understand that we needed to support each other, but each and every time it seemed like the words didn’t hold an actual meaning. Which pissed me off. Especially in moments like this. Yesterday we had finally gotten Abby to sleep, so imagine my anger when I woke up at four AM to an empty bed and my fiance in the bathroom in pain. When I opened the door he was examining his scar in clear discomfort. He tried to lie and say it had started hurting right now and that it wasn’t that bad. Which of course only served to fuel my anger. What really angered me was that if I hadn’t found him he would not have told me. We had stayed awake for a while, neither of us speaking. Until I decided we needed to go to bed, because he did need to work. 

It had been the worst not to be able to cuddle with him. Which brought me to the third reason I was having a bad week. After Spencer’s accident he and I had a talk. We both decided that even when Spencer’s money situation was great, and my trust wasn’t even touched yet, Abby deserved to have a back up. It wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world for her to have a hefty amount of money that was hers, something that gave her the opportunity to decide in the future. I had had it before, and it was a little selfish of me to deprive her of the opportunity. The thing is that sometimes I could hold grudges a little too well. I accuse Spencer to be obtuse when I am too. It was hard sometimes for me to understand that I wasn’t the teenager that would do anything to spite my dad and my brother anymore.

I took a long steamy shower while Abby slept. Even when I got out of the shower the kid seemed to be catching up on her Zs so I went back to bed and did the same thing.

Of course I was mad, but it happened. Spencer had told me before how it was healthy to have arguments in a relationship once in a while. He had mentioned how it was a healthy way to release frustration as long as the argument didn’t escalate into something that could wedge the relationship. You can literally ask any couple that is over their honeymoon phase and I guarantee they all fight. Small or big arguments but arguments nevertheless. We just needed to know that we loved each other, and in the end the argument needed to come to a healthy finish line. 

I wanted to hate him sometimes, which seemed impossible, because even now when I was pissed at him I sunk my face in the pillow that smelled like him. I just wish the genius was smart sometimes, and let me in. I closed my eyes letting my body relax for the first day in nine days.

“I love you so much”, I said, kissing Abby in the cheek. The kid smiled brightly at my words. “Daddy and mommy love you so so much”, I said, hugging her close to me.

She squirmed away which made me really happy, it meant that she was back.

I let her continue with her artwork, the crayons scribbling nonsense on the paper. I leaned back on the couch and watched the TV for a second, before the doorbell interrupted.

“You want to come see who it is?”, I asked the kid, who frowned as she continued. “Okay you can stay but I need to put you in the little playpen alright?”, I said, it was probably just a delivery man who needed me to sign something, or someone from the firm here to pick Abby’s trust.

I put the baby on the playpen, making sure she didn’t have pieces of crayons in her hand. She was quickly distracted by the other safer objects in the space. I made my way to the front door.

The smile I had to greet whoever it was faded quickly.

“Johnny”, I said blandly.

“Hey dear sister”, he replied bitterly through a smile.

“I guess you are here for the trust”, I said.

“I am, aren’t you going to invite me in to your”, he waved around with his hand. “house.”

“No, I don’t think that’s going to be a good idea, I’m rather busy”, I said, I turned to face the side table where I had put the manila folder.

“Oh I bet you are, you must lead a very difficult life”, he chuckled. “Tell me is my niece… exhibiting the same behavior as her father, is she a difficult baby? Don’t worry DC has some great Special aid education, and now that you have put a dent in our dad’s pocket money can’t be a problem.”, he asked.

I sighed as I made sure all the papers were in order, I couldn’t give him the satisfaction of a reply as I handed him the papers. When I did though I could feel the smell coming out of him.

“Johnny are you drunk?”, I asked, with some concern in my voice. I hated the guy but he was clearly drunk, and he seemed to have driven all the way here. Now that I noticed the smell I could see how his clothes were a little too wrinkled and his hair a little too messy.

“Why do you care”, he slurred, I noticed how he had been dragging his words. 

“You shouldn’t be drunk”, I pointed out annoyed by his stance.

“Oh I’m sorry Miss Perfection”, he snickered.

“You know what I mean, I thought you had been sober for over three years now”, I said crossing my arms.

“I was, but shit happens doesn’t it?”

“You should talk to your sponsor… does dad know?”, I asked a little bit more concerned now, he was very clearly drunk and not just a couple of beers drunk.

“Oh now you are an expert on rehab? Why is that because of your junkie boyfriend?”, the smirk on his face was met by the serious expression of mine.

“What did you just say?”, I asked slowly and bitterly.

“Oh don’t worry I’m not running surveillance on you guys, I couldn’t give two fucks about him or you… A cop buddy of mine told me he attended some of the beltway meetings. It doesn’t surprise me in the slightest thought, you had always had that hero complex in you”, I could feel the anger building in my chest as he spoke.

“I think you should go”, I said, forgetting his state.

“Oh don’t be mad little sister, I won’t retaliate with this information, that’s how little I care about the two of you…”, he cooed, which just made the anger. “I am curious though, was it heroin, crack? Please tell me he is not using you and your money to get his fixings, because that would just make me laugh so much”, he started chuckling a little.

“If you don’t care about us then why the fuck are you here?”, I said, this time letting the anger show in my voice this time.

He shrugged his shoulders, “Dad told me he needed the papers and I offered. I wanted to see if for once you were going to come clean about what you did”, he said. 

I stood there confused at his words.

“What I did?”

“Oh don’t come all girl who wouldn’t hurt a fly to me. That might work with most people but I know how rotten you are sister.”, he stayed there as I frowned, genuinely interested in what the reason for his anger was now. “Tiffany”

The answer wasn’t enough. “Tiffany? is she okay?”, I asked trying to remember the last time I spoke to her.

“Oh wouldn’t I like to know! She fucking left, somewhere to Europe, said she needed time.”, He hissed the words.

“Oh… Johnny I’m sorry”, I tried to sound genuine.

“You are going to stand there and act like you didn’t know”, he said, angrier now as he stepped inside the house.

“I didn’t”, I stood my ground.

“You are… You are a bitch that should’ve been taken care of when my dad could. I can’t believe you want to stand in there and pretend like you didn’t tell her to go”

“I didn’t!”, I said again frustrated. “Last time I talked with her she asked me about my relationship and that’s it!”, I tried to remember the exact words I used.

“Oh and I bet you told her how you live the perfect fucking life”, he growled. I could already recognize the anger building in him. Nothing short of a ticking time bomb.

“You need to go now”, I said. This was a conversation I didn’t need to have with my brother right now. “If you truly don’t care about us then you should act like it.”

“Oh and you would love that wouldn’t you? You would love to forget me and my dad, who by the way is pissed at you for letting David Rossi have a closer relationship to Abby than him.”

“Well Dave has never done anything to me to make me fear for Abby’s safety.”, I shrugged my shoulder now.

“Ow, boo hoo you fucking baby. You act all tough, like you can actually defend yourself but you can’t. Look at you shivering just from my presence, I can break you down to nothing and you know that”, he said getting closer to me, I took a step back.

“Out of my house now”, I warned.

“You are here living your fucking life. The fantasy life you pretend is all rainbows and butterflies, how do you do it? Does he let you be the whore you are behind his back? Or does he accept it because he knows he needs the money anyway?... Oh no… let me guess, he doesn’t even know right? I wouldn’t be surprised, the guy clearly has issues. Taking advantage of a man like him is low for you sis…”

I had heard more than enough. The next things happened in quick succession without letting me think about it. Before he uttered another word my palm hit his face with a thwack. In a matter of seconds I felt his own palm to my cheek, The world went blurry around me, my ears popping. When my eyes went back to search for Johnny he was on the floor holding his chin. I felt a pair of arms around me and looking up I found Spencer’s very concerned eyes. Joseph was here too, clearly having seen the scene and helping Johnny get up. He shot one last angry look at us, saying some words I couldn’t understand and they were both out after Spencer shouted something.

“(y/n) (y/n)”, I heard when my ears popped out. “Are you okay?”, his words were rushy and high pitched, with as much concerned as I had seen him have.

The other thing I heard was the high pitch wailing of Abby coming from the living room. I practically ran to her picking her up and hugging her. I shushed her a little.

“It's okay baby mommy is here”, I said kissing her head.

Spencer stood a couple of feet away in confusion.

“What… What happened…?”

“He was drunk, he wanted to rile me up”, I explained.

“We need to press charges”, He said, walking slowly towards me.

I shook my head hugging Abby.

“(y/n)... he hit you on your own property… he came here just to bother you”, he tried to reason.

“We can’t, there’s nothing we can do”, I said avoiding his eyes.

“What do you mean there is nothing we can do? He has to pay somehow…”

“But he won’t”, I cut him off looking at his eyes. “He won’t because my dad will protect him”

I had been in this position more times than I cared to admit, than I wanted Spencer to know about. The way he was looking at me hurt.

“Then we need to talk to your dad, make him understand the severity of the situation”, he said as calmly as possible. His eyes were looking at Abby as she sucked on her thumb with quiet sobs.

“Be mad”, I said, almost begging from my chest.

“What…”, his eyebrows furrowed.

“Be mad… please.”, Now the tears were coming. “Stop looking at me like a victim and be mad at me for letting him get me like this, for letting me place a step in the house where our daughter lives.”

“This isn’t your fault… he is a grown man and he should know better”, he said sternly, my eyes traveled to his red fist.

“And I am a grown woman, who has a child and should know better than to pick a cat fight with my own brother…”, I sighed.

Based on the silence coming from the man in front of me I knew he agreed.

“You should have kicked him out the moment you knew he was drunk”, he nodded his head, his jaw clenching a little. “You are talking to your dad, and if he doesn’t listen we will press charges, if you don’t do it I will. I don’t care who they are, I won’t let him ever again lay a finger on you.”, His whole body was tense now.

I stayed quiet. He was right, and as difficult as it was to think about it I needed to confront my brother. Running from the past and pretending they don’t exist wasn’t doing me any good.

“I’ll talk to him tomorrow”, I nodded. “I don’t think I can have any sort of interaction with him today.”

Spencer nodded in agreement, coming and grabbing Abby carefully from my hands.

“Daddy”, the kid smiled happily hugging him.

“Hey pumpkin”, he kissed her head. When Abby got comfortable on his arms I looked up at him.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were hurting?”, I asked him.

“After the week we had with Abby I didn't want to lay anything else on you”, he confessed.

“Spencer I have my hands full worrying about her, I cannot worry about you too. That doesn’t mean I won't, it means that I’m more mad at you for hiding it than anything else. I need to know that you won’t hide this kind of thing from me”, I said, it was my turn to be mad. “If you are hurt there are ways I can help, but you need to tell me.”

“I will go to the doctor’s tomorrow morning, before work”, he promised. “There’s another.. thing”, he said looking down at Abby. His body was clearly nervous about whatever this was.

“Hey baby, why don’t you go and finish your painting?”, I said, taking the kid and placing her on the floor. I pointed to the kitchen to Spencer who understood and followed me there. I positioned myself to be able to see Abby.

“Spencer…”, I said extending my hand, I could see his hand flex on his side but he didn’t reach back. I crossed my arms.

“They changed my mom’s medication two days ago…”, his face dropped and his voice was low.

“I thought that she didn’t have to until next month”, I furrowed my eyebrows.

“She wasn’t responding to it and… well she isn’t responding to this one either”, he said. When he said the last words he turned to the fridge and pulled two bags of frozen corn. He walked towards me delicately, placing it in my cheek.

I hissed at the sensation but accepted the cold quickly. I could see the fire in his eyes.

“She isn’t lucid?”, I asked, he shook his head.

“That’s why you don’t want to go to the doctor’s?”, I asked doing the math.

“I know it doesn’t make sense, but it scares me. Even if this isn’t an illness that shows like that, I… I think about her. I think about me and about Abby and… It scares me”, he said, the shaking of his voice making my own heart quake.

I met his eyes.

“I think you should go visit her”, I offered, putting my hand on top of his.

“I can’t, I can’t leave you here with Abby, what if she is sick?”, he asked with a terrified expression.

“I can manage… You should go this weekend. Rossi has been asking us to go with him to his cabin, I think it could be good for Abby to be outdoors for a while…”

There was a lot of concern on his face.

“You know Rossi’s cabin isn’t a cabin right? is probably a mansion in the woods”, I tried to joke making the atmosphere dissipate.

“Are you sure?”, he asked slowly.

“I am”, I nodded, taking the bag away from my face and placing his other hand on my cheek.

“Abby was a lot better today, she acted like the last week didn’t happen at all”, I said, he sighed in relief. “You should have seen her chase goof around this morning, even the dog missed her”, I smiled.

“Do you think she was just… in a bad mood?”, He asked carefully.

“I actually do, she might have been uncomfortable with the change of season, you know with all the organisms in the spring air.”

“You sound like me”, he chuckled. I smiled at that.

His eyes were planted on my probably already red cheek but I moved my head for him to meet my eyes.

“I love you Spencer”, I said, unlike this morning these words were uttered with all the emotion I could muster.

“I love you too”, He pulled me in a hug. “God I want to kill your brother”, he sighed.

“Yeah I think many people do…”, I said rubbing his back.

“Daddy!!”, Abby called him over now. 

He pulled away going to see the girl and sitting next to her. I let him for a second before joining them.

“What are you guys doing?”, I asked, sitting next to Spencer.

“Abby is showing me the art she has been working on”, Spencer pointed at the papers with all the colorful doodles. 

Once Abby got back to her drawing Spencer looked at me. I leaned to make our lips meet.

“No”, Abby complained, trying to get between us.

I chuckled in his lips. He pressed our foreheads together as he looked down at the girl who was wedging between us, very displeased that her daddy was putting his attention elsewhere. We both leaned at the same time placing a kiss on each of her cheeks. She twisted her face at the action.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this chapter is a little... weird?
> 
> I wanted to add some depth to the relationship and show some of their bad moments as well without deviating too much from the story.
> 
> Don't worry there is plenty of fluff to come including one Abigail Reid dressing her dad up... 
> 
> Love you guys and thank you for reading.


	36. Chapter 36

I hid behind the couch, after a second I took a glimpse at my surroundings. The kid who spotted the top of my head laughed loudly and followed me behind the couch.

“Mommy!”, she spotted me once she walked around and saw me.

Her bubbly laughter just prompted my own as I swoop her off the floor into my arms.

“You caught me!”, I praised hugging her and peppering kisses on her cheek. 

Once she decided the celebration was enough I put her down on the floor. It didn’t make any sense to count anyway so I just turned to the hallway, away from her as her little feet ran around the living room.

When the front door opened and Spencer entered I brought a finger to my mouth telling him to keep quiet. He slid his satchel off his shoulder and into the entrance table. He walked in silence and carefully towards me.

“I’m coming for you!”, I said. We both looked around the room now, two little feet coming out from behind the curtain. “Abby! where are you?”, I said loudly. I pointed at the curtain and Spencer nodded with a playful smile on his face.

“I got you!” Spencer said, pulling on the curtain to reveal the toddler.

“Daddy!”, she said now even more excited than before, her laughter erupting from her chest as she reached up to be picked up.

Her dad did so without hesitation, bringing her to his hip and kissing her cheek.

“Hi pumpkin, how are you?”, he smiled.

“Mommy and I pway”, She explained.

“Oh is that what you did today?” he asked, walking towards me.

“All day”, I nodded. He placed a chaste kiss on my lips before smiling.

“Hi darling”, he said, his voice so low it made me blush.

“Hi Doctor”, I replied.

“How was your day?”, he asked, sitting down with Abby in his arms, I sat next to them.

“It was entertaining, but then again every day with this one is entertaining”, I said leaning forward to Abby.

She narrowed her eyes at me before leaning a little and kissing my cheek. I smiled satisfied and retreated.

Spencer looked between us with a proud smile on his face.

“Daddy and me pway?”, she asked the man.

“Of course baby, why don’t you go ahead and choose what you want to play”, he said as the kid slid off the couch. Once she went to her room he pulled me closer by the legs.

“I missed you today”, he said hovering on top of my face.

“Hmm how much?”, I asked with a grin on my face.

His lips tenderly met mine at first. “This much”, he said, rubbing his nose to mine. My smile only grew.

“That’s a fair amount to miss me”, I nodded.

“Did you hear from your dad again?”, he asked. 

“You didn’t break Johnny’s jaw and he will not be pressing charges”, I said, there was some relief in his face.

“He still has it bruised up right?”, he asked.

“Oh yeah, that said every time he speaks he winces”, I nodded.

“Good”, Spencer said and I chuckled.

My dad had called me over the weekend horrified when Johnny didn’t show up to work Thursday and Friday just to find out Spencer had decked him straight on the jaw. Of course they had threatened to sue and press charges before I had told him exactly what happened. As I suspected he didn’t do much more than say he will speak to him. The thing with the Harveys is that I had enough dirt on both of them to make them rethink their actions towards me at least enough. They had picked the wrong person on the wrong weekend. With Spencer gone to Vegas Abby, goof and I joined Rossi to his cabin. The cold weather made it a perfect excuse to stay inside eating pasta and leisuring. 

“How’s your mom?”, I asked him, running my hand through his arm.

“She is doing better, She’ll be going back to a medicine that worked a couple of years ago”, Spencer said biting on his bottom lip.

“I’m glad to hear that”, I gave him a sweet smile. 

“Thank you for letting me go”, he said softly.

“Spencer, you can go visit her as many times and as often as you want”, I said.

“Yeah… the Doctor was telling me about a research group opportunity that’ll open up in Maryland soon”, he said.

“Oh that’s great!”, I replied.

“Yeah I’ll do my best to get her in.”

“Daddy!”, Abby came back to the living room. 

“Oh I’m sorry for keeping you waiting!”, he said, picking the kid up. “Let’s go play okay?”, he said kissing Abby’s frown away.

I rested my head on my hand as they both walked into her room.

I made my way to the kitchen, pulling out a couple of fruits and starting to cut them up. Once I had a bowl of it I put everything back and made my way to the room. I wasn’t prepared to walk in and see Spencer wearing a tiara and a little multicolored tutu skirt I wore when playing with Abby. 

Spencer’s eyes met mine as his cheek flushed.

“You look cute”, I snickered, putting the bowl on the table where Abby could reach. She made her way grabbing a slice of apple and starting to munch on it.

“Don’t laugh”, he cautioned.

“I don’t think it is funny, I think this is cute”, I corrected.

Behind the furrowed eyebrows I could see the amusement of his face.

“What are you guys playing?”, I asked abby.

The kid looked up at me offering her half chewed apple slice.

“I’m okay”, I said planting a kiss on her cheek. “We’ll probably need to give you a bath before bed”, I said looking at her already sticky chin and cheeks.

I turned around to where Spencer had grabbed his own apple slice and was eating it.

“I will go work on something, I’ll check on you late princesses”, I snickered walking out.

“You aren’t cute”, Spencer said as I was heading out.

“Oh I think I am!”, I shot him a smile before heading to the office.

How The Fuck was I suppose to write wedding vows? The pen hovered over the blank paper. I blamed my lack of words to the fact that Spencer and I were too sappy. Maybe if I just stopped saying I love you from here to the wedding I could get away with surprising him during our vow exchange. I rolled my own eyes at the stupid idea, it was like I was unable to stop myself with him. Then there was the obvious problem that Spencer was a lot better with words than I was, by this point he probably had three of these little black books full, both sides of the paper too. There wasn’t a lack of words either, it was that I needed to make sure the words I said were special. I closed the book, putting it back on the cabinet and running my hands through my head. I decided to put it off for later, walking out I started turning the lights off. I made my way to the nursery where Spencer sat on the chair with Abby on his lap.

“Oh look, mommy is joining us for a bedtime story”, Spencer said as the kid looked up.

I moved quietly to sit on the armrest of the chair.

Spencer continued reading ‘If animals kissed goodnight’. 

“If animals kissed like we kissed goodnight, The sky would turn black the moon would shine bright. All would grow quiet with all tucked in tight- but the sloth and her cub? Still goodnight”

Spencer dragged the last word, eyeing Abby as her eyes shuttered close. We stayed there looking at her.

“She’s so big”, Spencer frowned.

“She is only seventeen months love, she’s still a baby”, I reminded him.

“I know, but it seems like yesterday when she was so tiny she could fit on one of my arms…”

“Getting nostalgic Doctor Reid?”, I asked, trying to avoid the nostalgia myself. Abby had outgrown my favorite dress of hers a couple of days back, that was something I didn’t need to tell the man right now.

He nodded with a pout on his mouth. After a minute he stood up and carefully placed Abby on the crib. I made my way to tuck her in. The kid didn’t even flinch when she was put on the mattress, just pulled a stuffed animal closer to her.

I leaned forward to rub her forehead, brushing some wild curls out of the way.

Spencer’s arm encircled me from behind as he rested his head on my shoulder. His hand rubbing my tummy. I knew what that body language meant way too good. I placed a kiss on his cheek making him smile.

“Ready to go to bed?”, I asked as if he hadn’t asked me without words already.

“yes please”, he said. He turned the light off making sure the little plugged in light was working before following me.

When I walked in the room and made my way to the bed I eyed the black book that was on Spencer’s bed side table. When and why did he leave it there. I tried to avoid looking at it as it would only tempt me. Instead I waited for Spencer to get out of the bathroom. Instead of walking to his side of the bed he sat in front of me, moving my feet out of the way.

“What is it?”, I sat up getting closer to him.

“Something’s bothering you”, he pointed out. I furrowed my eyebrows.

“No…”

“You have been quiet tonight, and when I said I love you early you didn’t reply”, he said taking my hand. “Whatever it is you can tell me”

Oh, I was dumb enough to think he would not notice.

“Well… do you want the truth?”, I asked with a sheepish smile.

He let out a huff tilting his head.

“I have been trying to write my vows, and I can’t actually find the right words.”, I said, When he narrowed his eyes I took his other hand. “I have words, I just want these to be extra special”, I explained.

“That’s okay, most people have problems writing their vows”, He said rubbing my cheek.

“I’m sure you don't, you always know exactly what to say”, I rolled my eyes.

Without saying anything he shimmied in the bed to reach the book that was on his table. 

“Open it”, he instructed, handing it to me and resuming his position.

I narrowed my eyes, I didn’t want to spoil anything.

“Open it”, he said again.  
This time I did just to find… nothing. The pages as empty as mine.

“I had taken it to the school with me thinking I could write better there, turns out I can’t”, he said rubbing my leg now.

“You don’t have anything?”, the bright smile on my face probably shouldn’t be there, but it was good to know he was as lost as me for once.

“I have plenty of things, but they all blur in my head. Every time I think I have something I want to say I realize that there are a thousand things I could say to you to tell you how much I love you. Words aren’t enough to express that.”, he said.

“Oh you should definitely say that '', I smiled putting the book aside and kneeling on the bed.

“Maybe I can say how every time you look into my eyes I discover a new kind of crazy one can be”, I said leaning to kiss him.

“Or I could say how your kisses let me know I’m home”, he said pulling me to his lap.

“I could say how your arms are the safest place I’ve been”, I continued the game undoing his buttons.

“I love you”, he said between kisses. This time I was not going to deprive him from the answer, I pulled back with a smile.

“I love you”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you saw the message i posted thank you for understanding, I think I like this chapter better than the one I had posted.
> 
> Thank you guys for reading ILY!


	37. Chapter 37

I scrolled through the messages making sure I was getting the correct building number, after confirming it I exited the car making my way to the back. This time I was dressed a lot more appropriately, compared to last time. I had on a yellow collared vintage dress that screamed summer vibes. I opened the back door, getting Abby out of her seat and getting my black purse.

“Are you ready to surprise daddy?”, I asked the kid, she looked up at me curiously.

I started walking, Abby deciding right away she wanted to walk instead. It probably wasn’t the usual sight, a woman slightly crouched as a baby guided her around campus, but Abby seemed delighted. Every couple of steps somebody smiled and waved at her, making her wave back and get distracted. It took us two times as long to make it to our destination. Which was ideal considering I didn’t want the kid interrupting an important class. When we finally made it to the auditorium Abby let me pick her up as I walked in. The first thing I did was read words written on the board, when I deemed it appropriate enough I walked in, sitting in the very back where a whole row was available.

I could only see the back of Spencer as he drew a big triangle on a projected map.

“In cases like this where the distance is too wide we profile this way. This tells us the unsub has to a degree some knowledge of geographical profiling and is trying to avoid places that could be directly linked to them.”, Spencer said turning around. The keyboards of the classroom started clicking as he waited for everyone to take their notes.

I tried to avoid having Abby realize who was on the bottom of the auditorium. Once she turned around it was impossible. No sooner did the kid spot the man that the word came loudly out her mouth in the worst moment, right when everyone went dead silent.

“Daddy!”, Abby said trying to get away, I blushed when all the faces turned to the two of us. 

My eyes traveled to where the man stood. His confused face morphing into a smile as soon as he spotted where the disruption came from.

“Class it seems like today we have a visitor”, he said. He beckoned me with his hand, I clumsily made my way to the floor as the eyes perched on the two of us.

Once I was in front of him I gave him an apologetically smile.

“Daddy”, Abby said leaning forward, Spencer got her in his hips in a swift move giving both of us a surprised smile.

“Daddy indeed”, I turned to see the crowd where the comment came from, a group of girls blushing and whispering now.

Spencer seemed to not have heard the comment.

“This is (Y/N, Y/L/N), my fiancee, and this is Abigail my daughter.”, he introduced us.

I waved apologetically at the students. Abby, who was very excited to be here, pressed her lips against Spencer’s cheek, making the students aw in unison. Spencer blushed slightly before returning his attention to the crowd.

“I think it’s okay if we finish class ten minutes early today? No homework for this weekend, everyone stay safe”, Spencer smiled as the students happily put their stuff away.

“I’m so sorry”, I apologized now to him, the noise of the people around us giving us a sense of privacy.

Spencer looked slightly more tired. I knew exactly why, the semester was to end in a couple of weeks, and he had to go back to Quantico as soon as it did. Although he enjoyed being a professor that was not what he loved to do, even when he was so much confident in this position. The real problem was to see if he was ready to go back to the BAU, or if I was ready for him to be out there. After all the last time he was out in the field he… I took my mind away from those thoughts, he still had more options within the bureau. I was going to support him no matter what. His nervousness was what prompted this trip in the first place, I had decided this morning to do something special for the three of us. 

“Don’t be”, he smiled. “What are you guys doing here?”

“Oh we have a…”

“(y/n)! so nice to see you again”, The woman walked towards us with a big smile. “Oh my God the famous Abby, she is so cute”, she leaned forward to see the kid.

“Hello Charlie”, I tried to say in a friendly manner.

“How have you been?”, she asked, turning to see me.

“Good, What about you?”

“Oh We’ve been magnificent.”, she beamed. We? 

After a moment of silence she turned to Spencer again.

“Well I guess you guys probably have some plans for the evening. Again, very nice to see you again. Spencer, I’ll see you Monday?”, she asked looking at him.

“Yeah, have a good weekend”, he smiled at her. I resisted rolling my eyes.

“What?”, he asked amusedly when she left.

“Last time I was here you were Doctor Reid”, I pointed out.

Spencer shook his head with a chuckle as he directed his attention to Abby.

“What are you doing here pumpkin? This is such a nice surprise you and your mom gave me”, he smiled placing a loud kiss on her cheek.

“We have another surprise for you!”, I announced, he seemed intrigued.

“What is it?”, he asked carefully.

“Well Doctor Reid if I tell you it won’t be a surprise, now go put everything in your office we’ll wait for you here. You better hurry, we need to go pick some pizzas from that place you like”, I smiled at him.

“Hmmm what did I do to deserve pampering?”, he leaned to me.

“You just exist”, I placed a small kiss on his cheeks as I grabbed Abby, who was already trying to get back in his arms.

The car ride was filled with Abby’s voice trying to sing the lyrics of the Little Mermaid’s soundtrack. Once we parked and got inside Abby and I made our way to the kitchen, me placing the pizzas on the counter. Spencer followed us half expectantly.

“You go take a quick shower, get in your pj’s and after you can join us upstairs”, I said.

“Upstairs?”, he asked confusedly, we barely used upstairs, With Abby walking the last thing we needed was an accident.

“Yep, and hurry because we already miss you”, I said as Abby looked up at the man with confusion over why he wasn't picking her up. 

When I was a little girl I had been a girl scout. It was part of the activities the school I attended tried to get us involved in. Even though it was only an excuse for my dad to have me out of the house as much as possible I enjoyed it. One of the things I learned was to build a damn good fort. 

The family room upstairs had only a sectional sofa and a TV, so with the help of a couple of blankets, some poles, books, and chairs. I had built a big enough fort for the three of us, only one opening facing the tv. When I heard the footsteps on the stairs I crawled out, giving Spencer a bright smile.

“What is this?”he asked, smiling brightly.

“Well, since you hate camping I thought I would bring camping to us. Welcome to Reid's fort.”, I said standing up.

“We are staying here for the night?”, he asked when I put the baby gate in the stairs.

“Oh yeah, we have your favorite Pizza, Abby’s favorite apple juice and my favorite snacks.”, I nodded my head.

Abby crawled out of the fort carefully, we were both wearing our pajamas. The kid practically ran towards her dad as he picked her up.

“Only thing is we might need to eat outside because I made it a little too small.”, I said.

“I love you two, so much”, Spencer said in a serious voice that made my heart melt.

“We love you too”, I hugged him, “Right Abby? We love daddy”

“Wuv you”, Abby agreed, placing a kiss on his cheek as I kissed the other one.

“Okay then let’s eat!”, Spencer said with no protest as we sat around the pizza boxes on the floor. 

“How do you know how to build forts like this? It seems very sturdy”, Spencer said as I and Abby crawled in.

“Girls Scouts”, I said as I sat inside.

“You never told me you were a girl scout”, he said crawling in, it was very comical to see him try not to bump anything.

“Just for a couple of years… babe be careful”, I said when he bumped his head against the blanket making the roof move in a threatening manner. 

Abby looked up. “Daddy bad”, she frowned at the man.

“I’m sorry”, he said sitting now next to us. Abby still crawled into his lap giving him a hug, I smiled, the fort was definitely a little small, but it felt like a cocoon perfectly made for the three of us. 

I turned the TV on, making it the only light in the room besides the fairy lights I put around the blankets. 

The Lion King started playing as we pulled a fluffy blanket over our bodies.

I could already see Spencer’s body relaxing, letting me know my plans had worked. At this moment it was just the three of us in our little world. I looked over at Abby who was already closing her eyes from the coziness of the situation.

“Thank you”, Spencer said mid movie, I looked over at him. 

“You’re welcome”, I blushed.

“You and Abby are my whole world, I would trade everything to be with you two like this forever”, his voice was soft, making me pout a little.

“We love you too Spencer, and we are always going to be here for you…”, I reminded him.

“I know my sweet girl, I know”, He smiled leaning to give me a kiss.

The exterior world could call it quits. All that mattered was inside a blanket fort right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I'm sorry for the short chapters, but I wanted to give you guys a mental image of Spencer in a fort to brighten your weekend.
> 
> I have been having a rough week but now that is over... is anyone ready for some bachelor/bachelorette party sheananigans?


	38. Chapter 38

I sat on the floor, as Abby brought me one of her American girl dolls.

“Baby”, she pointed at the doll. 

“Oh is she a baby?”, I asked looking down at the doll, once Abby nodded I cradled the doll in my arms.

“Wittle girl”, she cooed at the toy. I bit my cheek, she was definitely echoing words she had heard about herself. 

Spencer came into the room sitting in front of me on the floor, his hair was messier than usual.

“How’s the grading going?”, I asked humously, I could tell by the looks of it that grading final papers for two hundred plus students wasn’t easy. 

“Good, it gets repetitive after a while so I decided to come see how my girls were doing”, Spencer smiled when Abby came back. 

She was now wearing a small white coat around her body. I chuckled when she placed the plastic stethoscope in the baby’s head. The whole doctor’s toy set was a gift from Emily from a while back. It was her favorite game to play after a visit we made to Dr Arya after she turned 18 months, she had the chance of seeing how everything worked and associated back to the plastic replicas she had at home. Needless to say that Spencer melted the day he came back and she was dressed as a doctor. ‘I have a PhD and a MD’, I had joked, earning a little laugh.

“How is she, Doctor?”, Spencer asked curiously.

“Uh-Oh”, Abby made an O with her mouth as she fumbled in the little red bag with the white cross on it.

I shot a comically exaggerated confused look at Spencer, there had been no Uh-Oh’s at her visit so she definitely got them from somewhere else. We both watched as Abby pulled out the toy syringe from the bag, coming down at full force against the doll’s arm.

We both scuffed. when she waited inspecting the toy.

“Is she doing better now?”, Spencer asked, when the kid turned around to see him.

“Daddy ouchie?” she asked, walking towards him. He placed the stethoscope in the middle of his chest, narrowing her eyes.

“How am I? Do you hear any anomalies?”, he asked with a fake preoccupied expression.

“Uh-Oh”, she repeated the words, going back to her bag.

“Oh Doctor, please tell me my husband is okay”, I played along. I could see the smirk on Spencer’s face at the word husband.

“Mommy hep”, the kid said, handing me a hello kitty band aid, which I helped her open. I handed her to her, placing her little finger on the cotton part.

The toddler did not waste a second before walking to Spencer, standing on his thighs and placing the bandaid right in the middle of his forehead.

I winced at the unnecessary force used, but Spencer didn’t say anything more than a thank you. 

“I feel better already”, he said, hugging Abby close to him.

“Daddy”, she complained, showing him her finger that had kept some stickiness.

“Oh let me clean that for you”, he said using the fabric of his sweater to clean the residue.

Before his phone started ringing. There was a moment of utter confusion before he answered.

“This is Doctor Reid”, he said. His eyebrows furrowed further in his face. He handed me Abby as he stood up in one motion.

“Morgan, are you sure about that?”, he said, without missing a beat he walked to the bedroom. “How long ago was this”, was the last thing I heard.

I stayed there for a second, before I put Abby on the floor and walked into the bedroom with him. It felt almost like a deja vu. The call and his quick change of postures were too familiar for me. When I got in he was already throwing clothes in his go back. This couldn’t be good.

“No, If she says this is fine I’ll meet you guys in thirty.”, He shot me a look. “Morgan are you sure?”, he asked again. When the answer came he nodded his head. “I’ll tell her before I go.”, he said clearly talking about me. 

Once he put the phone on the bed he turned to see me.

“I need to go to Quantico right now there’s been an emergency.”, he said, he walked to the closet pulling out some more clothes and throwing them in the bag.

“Is everyone okay?”, I asked before he could say anything else. My heartbeat is already increasing.

His jaw clenched, his eyes traveled around the room. I could hear the gears on his mind turning, I knew he probably was trying to find the right words. There were no right words for what he said next, he guided me to the bed. Making me sit on the edge as he crouched in front of me. 

“There was this… this guy we put away a couple of years ago. He was being followed by organized crime and out of nowhere he started, he started killing what we knew where his old colleagues. The thing is, once he started he couldn’t stop, he started taking high risk victims and escalated to all kinds of people. It was a month-long hunt in the area and when we finally caught him in Bethesda, he knew more about us than what we knew about him. He had information about everyone, which he was not afraid of letting us know what he had on us. This was before you.”, There was a pause before he continued. “He was serving life in Lee’s but escaped a couple hours ago during transport.”

He could feel the tension on my body because he squeezed his hands lightly.

“Listen to me (y/n), I need you to stay here, with the doors and windows closed. Do not go out or let anyone in unless me or the team tells you otherwise.”, he said I could feel the rug pulled from under my feet. If this situation was this dangerous, why was he going?

“Spencer”, the only plea that came out of my mouth before he hugged me.

“Don’t be scared, this is just a countermeasure alright? Once I know you guys are safe I’ll let you know.”, He rubbed my back.

“I thought… Why are you going?”, I asked, it made me sound selfish but I needed to know. 

“I was one of his primary targets back then. I profiled him so Strauss is calling me back.”, He said as his eyes seeked mine. He placed his hand under my chin making me look at him. “We are going to be fine alright? I love you.”

My head nodded solemnly before I spoke.

“I love you too, please come back home safe to us”, I said the words I hadn’t said in a while. 

“I will”, he nodded now, zipping his bag close and walking out. Walking to the living room and giving Abby a kiss on the head.

“Daddy's got to go to work okay? But I’ll be back really soon.”, he said, Abby was absently playing with her doll. He made the kid look up at him much like he had made me.

“Daddy loves you so much little one”, he said as she smiled.

“Wuv you”, she said puckering his lips and placing them on his cheek.

I heard the long sigh before he walked back to me.

“I’ll call you if anything happens”, he said. “Close everything, have Goofy and Abby sleep with you if I’m not back tonight okay? Do not go out or let anyone in you understand?”, he instructed.

I nodded before he got closer to me.

“Talk to me”, the command came a little more harsh than what he intended, catching us both by surprise.

“yes, I understand”, I nodded, he placed a small kiss on my lips before walking out.

“Spencer”, I called before he started walking to the front door. 

He turned around slowly, I walked towards him. Once I was in front of him I ripped the hello kitty band-aid from his forehead and handed it to him. There was a smile on his lips before he pulled me in for a kiss.

“Go”, I sighed when we finally pulled away. He nodded, resuming his walk out of the house.

My feet followed him, arming the alarm and starting to close all the blinds and curtains of the house, even going upstairs and making sure everything was closed. I locked all the doors and placed a line of loud toys along the stairs to alarm me if anything were to happen. By the time I made it back to Abby my heart was racing. I needed to keep calm, I repeated myself as the kid tried to pull me back in the game. 

No matter how hard I tried to concentrate on Abby my eyes traveled to the TV, we were now eating some Mac and cheese as the news talked about anything but the thing I wanted to know about. I sighed returning to Abby as the kid brought another noodle to her mouth, licking the sauce and putting the noodle back on the plate.

“You’ve got to eat more than that Ab”, I said, bringing the spoon to her mouth. She closed her mouth and shook her head. “Okay okay, you do it.”

She took the spoon and looked at me, “Daddy?”

“Daddy is working right now, he’ll be back soon alright? For now you need to eat.”

Unsatisfied with my answer the kid went back to licking the sauce out of another macaroni.

I eyed the TV again, still nothing.

I picked my phone up before it even started properly ringing.

“Spencer”, I said without reading the name.

“How are you guys?”, he asked, I sighed in relief when I heard his voice.

“We are trying to have some dinner right now…”

“Okay, I will have to… stay here for a couple of days.”, there was some uncertainty on his voice.

“I understand”, I said softly into the receiver.

“Listen”, I heard a door close on his end. “Strauss is making a plan for you guys, to keep you safe. For the moment and because there’s no apparent danger all we can do is be careful. We have enough food at home and I know this is not what you signed for but I need you to stay in place until I tell you okay?”

“Yes”, I said, my eyes watering.

“I really have to go, I love you guys so much”, he said. 

“We love you too Spencer”, I said the words before the line went dead.

My shaky hands brought my phone to my chest in an attempt to calm myself down. I needed to be strong and vigilant.

The following four days were nothing short of stressful, the only highlights were the calls from Spencer asking us how we were doing. I waited for the calls every time. Right now they were the only way of knowing he was safe. As much as I tried to distract myself I expected that at any moment Rossi would knock on my door with similar news as last time. The thing was that four days inside was a long time, especially for a little toddler and a normally active dog. I didn’t even go to pick up the mail per Spencer’s request. The only times a door was opened was when Goof needed to go outside, and even then I kept his outings as short as possible. The dog had definitely sensed the tension, deciding to sleep on the little ottoman on the foot of the bed. Abby had gotten fussy as well. Demanding to see her dad at least ten times a day, and crying when I started getting frustrated. As much as I tried to keep calm I was overwhelmed by the situation.

My attention rarely left the TV that was on with the news 24/7. My own survival and mommy instincts were the only thing that got me through the day at this point.

“Anderson is coming to get you guys, I’ll meet you here”, Spencer said into the phone.

“Everything okay?”, I said with a little fear in my voice.

“Yes, Strauss just wants to give you guys instructions in person”, he said.

I got me and Abby changed in record time. Promising the kid we would see her dad as I walked to the door. Checking through the peephole before opening the door.

“Agent Anderson”, I gave the man a polite nod. I had met him before. He was very nice, and close to the team.

“Ms (y/n), how are you?”, he asked with a small smile. 

“Good”, I said, trying to return the smile. He didn’t say anything else but shot a smile at Abby before nodding.

“Come with me”, he started walking to the black car, where a baby seat was already placed in the back. There was a woman driving the car who I did not recognize right away. 

I could see Anderson looking around, I found myself doing the exact thing.

The thing with eye vigilance is that it can only work so well. For the trained people it made it so that they could not only see but sense something suspicious. For regular people, like me it makes your head try to find things that look out of place. If I was better at it I could have noticed the slightly opened curtain across the street. The reality was that I couldn’t know that the neighbor’s were out of town for the week. There was no way for me to know that their house had been broken into, and there was definitely someone taking pictures of Abby and I from across the street. Once we all got in the car the drive was silent, the looming threat being ignored completely.

It was weird how little I knew about this place, I thought as I walked behind Anderson on the hallways. Especially considering the amount of time Spencer had spent here, this was his home away from home and I had only come a couple of times. 

Anderon turned, opening a door and waving for us to walk in. I did so meeting with Will’s expecting eyes.

Jack and Henry were also there, both kids clearly bored with their heads on the desk.

“Abby!”, they both said. I gave them a quick hug.

The toddler smiled widely asking me to put her on the ground, which I did, walking to the will once the kids had hugged her and she was showing them her doll.

“Do you know anything?”, I asked will, trying to whisper. He shook his head.

“No, Jen asked me to come and bring Henry”, he sighed.

“have you seen her?”

“Yeah she and Spencer came to her a couple of minutes ago, then Strauss called them out.”

That was all that there was to say. We both sat side by side on the table. The silence was only disrupted by the play of the kids.

When the door opened again we both stood up quickly.

“Spencer”, I sighed, running to hug him. I didn’t care that the rest of the team including his boss was behind him.

“Hi”, he sighed against my head. His body was warm and tense.

“How are you guys?”, Will asked, placing his hands on JJ’s belly. If it had been hard for me I couldn’t imagine how he felt about his eight month pregnant wife being out there.

“We are doing fine”, he reassured him, “Pen why don’t you take the kids to your office.”

“Daddy”, Abby said, running to her father.

“Hey pumpkin”, he said, picking her up and placing a kiss on her cheek. Abby hugged him by the neck for a second before he spoke again. “Why don’t you go with Aunt Penny, mommy and I will be right with you”, he said, handing her to Penelope much to the kid’s protest.

“Please take a seat”, Strauss said.

“Hey kiddo”, Rossi placed his hand on my shoulder.

“Hey”, I said, trying to give him a smile. He too walked out after a second.

The door was closed once Penelope, Derek, Emily, David and the kids exited.

The only people left where Strauss, Aaron, JJ, Will, and the two of us. We all sat on the table, my hand traveling to Spencer’s who quickly intertwined our fingers.

“We want to make sure everyone here knows that our families safety is our top priority. For the moment we have reason to believe Mark Griffin has fled the country, but the bureau will still provide agents to keep patrol of your houses for the next two months. The delicacy of the situation calls for every single one of us to be vigilant as well. We will provide any forms of security to protect you”, Strauss said as her eyes traveled around the room.

“It’s very important for us to think about the safety of the little ones”, Aaron said. “Still, without any leads all we can do is be optimistic.”, The grim expression of his face contradicted the words coming out of his mouth.

The tenison on the room could be cut with a knife as Strauss proceeded to explain how the patrolling worked. The gist of it was that since Will and I were the ‘civilian’ spouses there had to be extra security on us. Even then Will at least had a police background, I was drawing the short straws in the room and everyone knew it. Even when they tried and not to mention it. Once everyone had understood she dismissed us reminding everyone these were security measures.

The drive back home was a lot more tense, still Spencer tried to keep up with Abby’s anecdotes.

Once we made it home it was dark and late. Spencer got out first, looking around before coming to get Abby as I exited the car. We walked inside, Spencer arming the alarm once more and walking to the nursery with a very sleepy Abby. Well at least the trip had worked for her cousins to tire her up.

When I made it to the nursery Spencer was changing her into her onesie. I sat on the chair as the man put her on the crib, pulling out a book from the shelf and sitting down on the chair next to me to read softly to her. Through the bars of the crib Abby stuck her little hand out to hold Spencer’s who sat on the edge of the seat as he continued his reading. When the last words were read he snugged her hand back to her, making sure she was tucked in as the soft snoring started. He just looked at me and tilted his head towards the door.

I walked out of the room, going to the living room and sitting on the couch waiting for him. He got there, undoing his tie and sitting next to me, moving his body so he could face me.

“I missed you”, I whispered weakly.

“I missed you too my sweet girl”, he took my hand pulling me to kiss my head. “Thank you for listening to me”, he said.

“Of course…”

“I know it couldn’t have been easy, and you don’t deserve this. I want to give you a normal life but I…”

I cut him off before he could say anything else, sitting on his laps and hugging him.

“I love you”, I said, making emphasis on the word you.

It isn’t like anyone had promised me living with an FIB agent was easy anyway. Of course this was a little beyond what I imagined when we started dating.

“I know, and I love you two so much”, he started kissing my head. “Nothing will ever happen to you guys”, he said.

My brain wanted to tell him not to make promises he couldn’t keep but I couldn’t say that to him.

“Listen, Strauss suggested that maybe Penelope and you could take classes. Shooting classes, so the two of you could get a license to carry”, he said, I could already see where he was going as I saw him with horror. “I know, I know how you feel about it but I will be slightly less worried if you do too.”, he said.

“Spencer no… I don’t think I can…”

I said, primarily thinking about Abby and how curious she was about everything.

“Okay, okay, what about you going to some self defense classes?”, he suggested instead, I nodded my head.

“I can do that”, I said.

“Okay good, I will find some good ones, or I can have Morgan give you some.”, he said.

I just nodded my head. He bit his lip, looking at me once again trying to find the right words.

“There is something else we need to talk about”, he said looking at me. 

It clearly wasn’t a good thing, from the way his face just did that thing he did when he was worried. I rubbed his cheek as a sign of reassurance.

“I’m going back to the team, for the time being. JJ is going on maternity starting Monday and right now we cannot afford to have the team short handed. I’ll have Charlie finish the last two weeks of class and another teacher has already volunteered to cover too. Look, I know you don’t want me to go back, but for right now I need to be there. I will stay in headquarters, but the team needs me. I also would feel better if I had the latest information at all times..”

I nodded my head, looking away. I didn’t want him to see the disappointment in my eyes. I understood, I really did, but I had almost lost him once, I don’t know if I could go through it again. 

“Hey”, he called my attention, I looked him in the eyes as mine watered once again. “I’ll be fine.”

“You better be”, I said with a shaky voice as my face burrowed on the crook of his neck. His body enveloped mine in a hug. My eyes shutting close as the silent prayers that haunted my mind began again.

“We are going to be fine, is just for the time being”, he said again.

So that’s what happened. We made a whole security protocol for the three of us. There were days I couldn’t even notice the black car parked on my street as our routines started to go back to normal. Other than the personal defense classes, and the fact that Spencer got home a little later than what he was while teaching nothing changed. Days rolled into weeks which rolled into months. There weren’t any red flags or leads for us to stop what we were doing. Before anyone could notice the surveillance stopped. Everyone was almost convinced that the guy had fled the country, it was the smartest move after all. The optimism came back for everyone. Even more so after little Michael was born, a ray of sunshine after a weird month. Life continued and the wedding plans followed as planned. For all that mattered the threat seemed to have gone away. Of course we were wrong, we just wouldn’t know that until much later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the foreshadowing, but good news is...
> 
> Wedding day is so close! So you already know these next chapters are all love.
> 
> BTW this chapter is VERY important, but what is happening here should stay in the back of your mind for the time being.
> 
> OKOK that's all love you guys thank you for reading.


	39. Chapter 39

‘T-30 days’

The text read on my home screen, making me put the phone back on the nightstand and groan. I turned around in the bed again, my face meeting with Spencer’s who had his eyes closed and was softly snoring.

Ugh he was such a pretty sleeper. I ran the back of my index finger through his soft features. Normally his face contained sharp edges and defined shapes. When he slept his face became much softer. His eyelids twitched slightly at the sensation, not ready to wake up just yet his arm found my body and pulled me closer to him. I too happily accepted the new position, my face quickly finding comfort on his chest as his long fingers rubbed my back. When the ministrations ceased I looked up at him. His eyes barely opened seeked mine. I flashed him a small smile before he started depositing small butterfly kisses on my face. My eyes closed as my mouth let out a satisfied hum. Even with his lips pressed against my cheek bone I could feel his smile.

We both looked down when the bed shifted just slightly towards the end. The little girl pushing and climbing on top of the two of us. It was not humanly possible to fit between our bodies but somehow she managed, coming to rest right between our arms.

“Well good morning”, I told the kid who looked up at me and her dad.

“Good morning Abby”, Spencer said, giving her a small kiss on the cheek.

She just frowned, snuggling close to me. I ran my hand through the back of her head when she turned to hug me. We both gave each other knowing looks, and sure enough not even five minutes later the kid was back to snoring, the same soft exhaling sound her dad made.

Spencer laid there looking at both of us for a while. 

“At what time are the boys coming?”, I asked him. 

He shook his head with a soft chuckle “The boys”, he repeated the words.

“That’s what Morgan said, Boy’s night”, I wiggled my eyebrows at him.

“They should be picking me up at about seven”, he said. I nodded my head as my hand rubbed Abby’s little back. 

“Do me a favor and spare me the details”, I joked.

“I told him that I was okay with some steak for dinner and some poker”, he said bringing his hand to my arm and using his thumb to stroke the skin.

“Of course”, I said sarcastically. As soon as his eyelids started closing again mine did too. The three of us fell asleep again in no time.

“Surprise”, a man I did not recognize was on the other side of the door where Spencer and I stood.

“Ethan?”Spencer smiled letting the man hug him. “What are you doing here? I thought you were only coming for the wedding”, he said surprised.

Oh, that Ethan. An old friend of Spencer’s who lived in Louisiana.

“I flew in for the weekend, wouldn’t miss your last official night out as a bachelor”, he said.

I smiled when his eyes traveled to me.

“Now you must be (y/n)”, he said, extending his hand, when I tried to shake his hand he took mine and placed a delicate kiss on the back. 

“Nice to meet you”, I said smiling at him as Spencer’s arm encircled my waist.

“Nice to meet you too! When Spencer said you were gorgeous he didn’t do you any justice”, he said making me blush lightly. “And where is the little one?”, he asked.

“Come in, she’s in the living room playing”, Spencer said moving aside, saying hi to Morgan and Will who stood behind Ethan when they walked in.

“No Rossi or Aaron tonight?”, I asked when Morgan and I lagged behind.

“Well, Hotch had promised Jack to take him to the movies, and we told Rossi but then decided that father of the bride probably shouldn’t be involved tonight”, I smiled at the words Father of the bride but shot him a look at the last part of the sentence. He chuckled, putting his arms around me. 

“If that man comes home smelling like someone else you’ll feel my wrath Morgan”, I warned him, making him laugh more as we walked in the living room where Ethan was already holding Abby. 

I looked at him smiling widely as his daughter reached for him to pick her up. Which he did hugging her as he spoke to his friend. I smiled at the scene. In thirty days I would be able to call that man completely mine.

‘T-22 days’ The text of that morning had read.

“There is no way I am going out like this”, I said looking at myself in the full body mirror.

“You already have it on”, Emily so obviously pointed out. “Besides, you look bomb”, she concluded, using her hands to gesture my body.

Ok maybe I did look bomb. Just a little bit. In my defense I had been working out a lot more, the personal defense classes with Morgan had been no joke, and once I started I quite liked them. Plus all the extra yoga I was doing to calm my nerves for the wedding and to try and stay in shape especially after that entire month in which we tried caterers and cakes.

The sequin fabric made sure to cling to me in all the right places. Although it was so small I might as well be wearing a towel. The pink fabric only propped by two spaghetti straws on my shoulders. The front in a v neck and the back completely exposed. The bottom came to rest right under my buttcheeks, making them look round and giving me a little more confidence. The outfit was paired with needle high heels with lace straps that ended in my middle thigh. The girls had also made me wear a pair of long white gloves that covered my arms to the elbow and a small veil hair clip. 

Without any more protest Emily dragged me to the living room Where JJ and Penelope played with Abby.

“Oh”, Garcia chuckled smiling.

“Wow”, JJ said with a whistle.

Abby who had been examining the scene tried to whistle too, putting her lips in a kissy face and exhaling. I laughed walking towards her.

“Hi little one”, I said, she looked up at me a little confused. “You are going to be good tonight right?”, I said bending slightly to place a kiss on her head. 

“Oh remind me to not have you bend at all”, Emily said covering her eyes. I quickly readjusted myself pulling the fabric down.

“You look so good”, JJ said.

“thanks”, I smiled at her.

“Ok, let me let him see you and then we are out”, Penelope said taking my hand and dragging me to the front.

“Bye baby mommy loves you”, I managed to say loudly to Abby.

“Wuv you”, the kid said absently back to playing now.

When we made it to the office door Penelope opened it, pushing me inside and closing it behind me. Spencer, who had been cast away to his home office, looked at me up and down. An unrecognizable look on his face as he stood up.

“(y/n)...”, he breathed out.

“It was Emily’s idea”, I said a little bit too defensively.

Spencer sat on the edge of the desk. Honestly it felt like a miracle he was not ripping the fabric out of me. I would not be mad if he did.

“Come here”, he said.

I walked carefully towards him, standing right between his knees. He looked almost mad. 

“Turn around”, he instructed.

I did so slowly, I felt his fingers push the hair to the side. His index finger followed my spine down to where the fabric started again. My breath caught when his lips followed the same path, him bending a little and instead stopping in the middle of my back.

“Please do me a favor and bring this dress on one piece, I want to be the one who gets to rip it apart”, he said. His dominant voice sends shivers down my spine. 

Emily knew exactly what she was doing, that’s why she volunteered to babysit Abby tonight.  
Spencer and I had agreed to, starting tomorrow, take some abstinence time. Thinking it would maybe make the wedding night all that much more special. Right now I just wanted to come back.

“Yes Doctor Reid”, I breathed, and turned around to face him.

“You look beautiful”, he said now much softer.

“Thanks”, I blushed, he directed my face to his with his fingers under my chin.

“Behave”, he said once I tried turning the already sloppy kiss deeper, with my hand behind his neck.

“Yes Doctor”, I nodded.

“Don’t let anyone get too close to you”, he said.

As if anyone could make me feel what he did. Still one of my eyebrows shot up and I looked at him.

“Like that very handsy Stripper you had at your party?”, I asked, trying to sound bitter.

The thing was that the few pictures that were taken of that night all showed Spencer a little uncomfortable as the blonde tried doing her job. It felt me with pride when he came home and ran to my arms. Letting me know how much he had missed me. It’s not like he had ever given me reason to be jealous anyway.

As soon as my words left my mouth he pulled me for a more aggressive kiss. Letting me know how serious he was.

I moaned in his lips as the door swung open. Interrupting the path his hand was making down my back.

“Ugh guys are you kidding me?”, Emily complained as we separated quickly. “All you had to say is you look good Spencer”, she shook her head as JJ chuckled behind her. 

“I love you”, I said when she started pulling me out. I could only see the smile on his face. The motherfucker almost looked proud of himself, knowing damn well that was going to be the only thing in my mind.

The party was… interesting. The place was great, a little private room in a restaurant where we stuffed on steak and wine. It wasn’t until the opening of presents I remembered the bachelorette part. Several ‘toys’ all wrapped in phallic tissue paper and stuffed on black gifts bags.

“Look we don’t like to think of our Spence like that but we hope you guys like it”, JJ joked. Emily grimacing slightly and Penelope laughing.

Of course things turned weirder when A man dressed like a doctor and another dressed like Albert Einstein entered the room. 

I shot a very confused look at Emily as Einstein danced to the new music while getting rid of his clothes.

“What?”, she asked defensively. “We figured smart guys were your type”, she snickered.

I covered my eyes when the ‘doctor’ got rid of his coat to reveal a very thin thong barely covering anything. The laughs escaped my mouth as soon as the rest of the girls started encouraging them. 

God I hope somebody sends pictures to Spencer because I could not explain what was happening right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys!!!!!!! The next chapter is the wedding chapter!!!
> 
> Also for that one person who commented on chapter 1, saying how the story was bad and not worth reading. If you feel that way I can't do anything, but know that I'm writing this for fun. I'm not sitting here claiming that I'm Hemingway or anything like that lol. 
> 
> If you are liking the story so far thank you so much, as I always say all the comments and kudos make my day and encourage me to write!


	40. Chapter 40

“It’s too tight”, I said as the corset compressed my lungs, letting little oxygen fill them and making my stomach turn.

I could see the confusion of Penelope’s face through the whole bodied mirror that stood on the corner of the room.

“Sweetie I don’t think… okay”, she said, starting to undo the silk ties.

Even when she undid them all, the garment barely hanging on my body I couldn’t breath, she noticed my labored attempts of passing air. 

“Hey… do you want to take a break?”, she asked softly to which I nodded. 

She retrieved from behind me, walking quickly to the mini bar and pulling out a red can of coke, offering to me. The extreme cold of the beverage helped a little. My hand on my chest in an attempt of not letting the corset leave my body. I was only wearing stockings and the underwear Penelope had provided. The pure white lace fabric contrasting with my skin, hair and makeup had been done not too long ago. 

All eyes turned to the door when it opened, Emily standing up from her place where she did her own makeup and trying to cover my body as I stared at the person at the other side.

“Hey”, JJ said carefully, putting Abby on the floor as the kid who was just wearing her normal clothes for now walked towards me.

“Mommy”, she said, the room calming down and returning to their activities.

“Hi baby”, I breathed, letting my body relax as I sat on a chair and let her climb on my lap. 

“JJ, she is saying the corset is too tight it can’t be too tight”, I could hear Penelope tell her. Probably trying to whisper but too stressed by everything she needed to do.

“Hey guys? Can you give (y/n) and I a second?”, JJ asked, Penelope and Emily exchanged looks with her as she nodded. “Emily take Abby '', she instructed, the three exited the room, leaving a deafening silence between the two of us.

“How is he?”, I asked.

“Nervous”, JJ chuckled.

“He is nervous?”, the horror in my voice coming through.

“Yeah and so are you”, she said softly, pulling a chair and sitting across me. I furrowed my eyebrows slightly. I wasn’t nervous. Well maybe I was a little nervous, a lot nervous. Ok I was about to throw up.

JJ had been the designated hopper, being Spencer’s best friend her tasks were mainly to take Abby from room to room as she demanded to be with both of us, not understanding why our little family had to be separated.

She handed me a folded piece of paper. I took it with shaky hands.

“Come on, I’ll help you with the corset while you read the letter”, she offered me her hand which I took, she spun me to face the mirror as her fingers started working on the back.

_ “My sweet girl,  _

_ It’s crazy how much I miss you right now. My heart hasn’t stopped drumming all day since I woke up longing for you. The one thing that’s getting me through is to know that by the end of the day I will be able to call you my wife. I cannot wait to live the rest of my days with you, worshipping you as we make it through life.  _

_ You are the love of my life, _

_ Yours today and forever, Spencer” _

“Done”, JJ announced patting my shoulder. 

I looked in the mirror, the corset already on my body and it did not feel tight, if anything my whole body felt lighter.

“Thank you”, I said softly, somehow there weren’t tears in my eyes. Instead I chewed on the inside of my lip.

“You’re welcome”, she said in a knowingly manner. “(y/n)... actually, thank you”, she said with a confessionary tone.

“What for?” I asked, slightly confused.

“For making Spence so happy. He is one of the greatest people I know, and I’m just so happy that he has found you.”, now her eyes watered, as I turned and pulled her in a hug.

“He said that you didn’t need to reply to the letter, he wrote it to calm himself down”, she smiled, drying her eyes when we separated.

I nodded as she made her way to the door letting the other two women back in.

“Oh”, Penelope smiled widely when she saw me. 

“Ok, ready for the dress?”Emily asked excitedly, putting Abby in the bed. 

I nodded my head enthusiastically as the three of them managed to get the dress out of the hanger and in my body.

“Wow”, they said in unison as they looked at me. The veil came to my tied up hair softly, making it seem like there was a halo of light around my head and shoulders. 

Surprisingly there wasn’t any feeling of discomfort, I felt lighter, the only thing was the excitement on my chest. 

“Okay forty minutes till showtime, let’s do last minute touch ups and get the little flower girl on her dress shall we?”, Penelope said as the other two nodded their heads. 

The second time the door knocked we shot each other confused looks.

“It’s Rossi, can I have a minute with the bride?”, he asked. 

I looked around giving them a nod as they collected stuff and headed out. Emily taking Abby with her. 

Rossi entered the room in his suit, his eyes looking at me up and down.

“You look beautiful”, he smiled, his eyes becoming glassy.

“Thank you”, I said softly, giving him a smile.

“You look like your mother”, he said slightly furrowing his eyebrows as tears threatened to come out.

I handed him a kleenex, holding one of his hands in mine.

“I wish she could see me”, I confessed with sadness.

“I shouldn’t be making you sad, this is your day!”, he reprimanded himself. I gave him a warm smile, it was not like I hadn’t thought about it.

I had woken up next to Abby in this hotel room and thought how I wanted to be there for her. When the time came I prayed I was going to be able to see her go through this.

I sobbed just slightly, tilting my head back in an attempt to make the tears not fall. Succeeding to my own luck.

“She is going to be here with us”, he said. “I have something for you”, he put his hand in his pocket. I stood there looking at him with some confusion.

“I don’t know if you are doing this but, this could be your something old”, he opened the velvety box.

The small round locket inside. The one I had found in my mom’s things and given to him that one time at the cemetery. 

My eyes really watered again.

“I think you should have it”, he smiled.

“Rossi… I can’t... “, I said through twisted lips.

“Turn around”, he said softly, which I did. He placed it around my neck, my fingers fidgeting and adjusting the locket on my chest. 

“Thank you”, I finally said when he finished, turning around.

His arms enveloped me in a hug. 

“I love you so much kiddo”, he said.

“I love you too”, I said.

“Ok, now, I will be seeing you outside”, he said smiling at me while one hand rested delicately on my cheek. I nodded my head again as he walked out.

When the girls re-entered the room they looked confused but decided not to mention it. Instead doing finishing touches to my make up and getting Abby in her dress.

When Penelope announced we had ten minutes to go things started becoming chaotic. The three of them scrambled to finish everything as we made it out, through the halls of the inn and to the second floor where the ceremony was going to be held. My breath caught when I saw the people in the door.

Rossi stood there holding Miachael in his arms as Jack and Henry looked bored. I chuckled at that.

Rossi smiled at me as Penelope placed everyone in the correct order, going one by one and making sure everything was perfect, the wedding organizers she had hired helping her get everything in order. One of the guys handed me the bouquet, as I felt the photographer take candids of the moment. I breathed in when Penelope nodded her head giving her approval before standing in front of me.

We were back enough that when the doors opened no one was able to see us just yet. The soft harp started playing and the line started moving, Rossi standing by my side and slightly bumping my shoulder in an attempt to relax me.

I couldn’t see Spencer yet… The anticipation killed me.

The purple dresses of the bridesmaids were a contrast to my pure white one. The dress was just puffy enough on the skirt, while the top was mainly lace. The off the shoulder long sleeved dress giving me a classy look while also helping shape my body. 

The first making her way up was Emily, followed by Henry the ring bearer. The next one was Abby and Jack, Jack was there to make sure the flower girl made her way up to the altar without getting too distracted. I heard the audible aw of the crowd. Penelope followed soon after, just sending me a smile as Rossi placed my arm around his. I squeezed his forearm as he looked down at me.

“Are you ready?”, he asked.

“Don’t let me fall please”, I pleaded.

“I would never let you fall kiddo”, he reassured me.

I nodded as we finally stepped to the light. Now I could see, although I could recognize everyone my eyes traveled to the man standing at the altar. His hands in front of him as he was wearing a navy blue tuxedo. My eyes watered immediately and I could see his hand travel to his mouth. 

It was funny because the walk was so painfully slow, but at the same time it was so quick I couldn’t see anyone. I shot a smile but my eyes were glued to his. Like a moth traveling to the light I felt I floated towards the man. His eyes did not leave mine for a second, and the closer I got the more evident his tears were. When I finally made it to the couple of steps I turned to Rossi, the man placing a kiss at the top of my head as he handed my hand to Spencer’s.

My eyes went back to his again when our fingers made contact, sending shivers down my spine just from the miniscule action. Spencer’s face was soft as he looked at me then at Rossi. They gave each other a knowing nod, and I wondered what it meant as I came to stand in front of him now. The crowd was going louder as everyone took their seats.

“You look gorgeous”, he whispered at me.

“So do you”, I sighed, giving him a smile.

Penelope tapped my shoulder letting me know I needed to give her my bouquet, which I did turning around and finally taking time to see everyone. My eyes traveled to Diana who was smiling widely at the scene. I smiled at her and she tilted her head in a soft manner. I looked at my side where Aaron stood smiling.

“You guys ready?”, He asked. We both looked at each other and nodded.

The officiant we had decided on had flaked about two months ago. Of course it had sent me into a frenzy trying to find the perfect person to marry us. Aaron Hotchner had come like a godsent gift offering to do it himself. I knew Spencer was thrilled about the idea of having the man who he admired so much be the one doing this. 

“Good evening everyone! Today we withdraw ourselves from the usual routines of life to celebrate something bigger, the love that (y/n) and Spencer share for one another. I’d like to start by saying that both the bride and the groom are thankful to have the opportunity of sharing this moment with friends and family.

I have known Spencer Reid for almost ten years now. When he told me, a couple of years ago he had met someone he loved, I was happy to hear that. When I met (y/n), I was thrilled. She is someone you can’t not love. I was sure back then as I am sure now that the love they share is the kind of love that will make it through anything. Today is just another step of that love, a step in which we gather to see the future. A future of happiness as you both embark in this journey of life together. With the promise of a bright future for the two of you and your family.”, Aaron said looking at Abby who was in Penelope’s arms now.

“Now I’m sure you want to hear the words you have prepared for one another?”, he asked at which we both nodded. We broke our eye contact to one another as he turned to get the black book from Morgan. I knew, as well as everyone, that he probably had it memorized. Still he opened the book, reading the first line but then his eyes traveling to mine.

“(y/n), to say I love you is an understatement. I walked in life lost, filled with the grief of someone else, and when I finally met you you healed me. You walked into my life with your bright smile and your dresses and your sweetness and you swept my entire body. Filling me and emptying me all at once. Your hand guiding me through life in a completely new direction. For a while lost, not knowing how someone like you could live in the same world I did, was it possible that someone could be as sweet as you?” He said. 

My eyes watered a little as he squeezed my hand.

“My sweet girl, I love you, I love you in an inexplicable way and I don’t want it to be explained. For once I don’t want to learn or an answer because what I feel for you is greater than that. In the sense of the miraculous and supernatural you have made me a better person. I walk through life with a purpose, to come back to you. You are a devoted mother, and a wonderful girlfriend, with you by my side am sure I can do anything. There is a buddhist saying, that when you meet your soulmate, remember that the act of bringing you together was 500 years in the making. So, always appreciate and be kind to each other. I don’t know if it’s true, but if it is, I wish I could go back time to five hundred years and thank whoever or whatever butterfly flapped its wings to bring you to me today.”

He licked his lips as his nose twitched before continuing. “I know you don’t like me to make promises I can’t keep, so I won’t. So I’m not promising you all happy days, but I promise you that even in the worst of them I will be by your side. I promise that as long as I’m breathing I will adore you. I will not put my own pursuits over yours and I will always come back to you. Because you are my home, my sweet girl”, he finished.

I couldn’t help but sob at his words trying to protect my make up at all costs. He squeezed my hand again, giving me the small book. I took it. 

I probably took too long before turning around, trading books with Penelope.

“Mommy”, Abby complained, extending her arms to me. 

Penelope looked shocked, trying to pull Abby back but the kid refused.

“It’s okay”, I whispered, picking Abby up and placing her on my hip. 

I could hear the aws from the crowd again as Spencer’s eyes watered now. This time quickly filling up with tears as I handed him the book. He took it a little confused.

“I don’t have an eidetic memory but I remember the words”, I assured him with a smile. Even Aaron chuckled at the words. I smiled at him before looking back at Spencer.

“Oh Doctor Reid”, I started sighing, my voice louder now. The crowd chuckled at my tone. “You have always had a way with words which is probably why I thought it took me so long to write the right words. But it wasn’t. The real reason was that I couldn’t put what I felt in words. How could you explain that feeling I have when I see into your eyes? and I see love and kindness and dedication. The first time I saw you you looked like a hot mess”, I said, he chuckled as the crowd did too.

“He did”, I said as a defense, turning to face everyone and smiling.

“That day I was sure I was going to finish work by going to the police and filling a report, which would have been extremely awkward to explain later. But even back then when I saw into those hazel eyes, the same eyes our daughter has, I saw a good man. You have proven yourself to be one, everyday. A good man, the best dad, a great boyfriend. I don’t know what I did to find you but I’m glad I did. Whatever divine intervention it was that made our paths cross I’m so thankful it did. You have flooded my senses, shifting me into a whole new direction and I love you. I love you because you are you and because you love me. I love the way your nose twitches when you are in deep thought. I love the way you always make extra coffee in the mornings even when you know I probably won’t wake up until a little bit later, or the way you always leave me notes around the house to remind me of your own love. I love the way you are never tired for Abby or I, always willing to play when you get home. I promise you here, in front of our friends and family that I will never doubt the love we feel for one another.”, I finished, leaning a little towards Abby.

“Hey Ab, tell daddy how much you love him”, I whispered, just for her to listen. 

“Wuv you”, the kid said loudly. Another aw from the crowd as Spencer smiled widely. He rubbed Abby’s cheek lightly.

“I love you too”, he said, to both of us. I smiled up at him.

This time when Spencer turned to give Morgan the book I did too, Abby going back to Penelope without protest.

“Spencer Reid, do you take (y/n, y/l/n) to be your wife?”, Aaron asked 

“I do”, he said loud and clear.

“Do you, (y/n, y/l/n), take Spencer Reid to be your husband?”

“I do”, I said eagerly. Aaron turned to get the rings, placing them in our hands. 

“Groom, please repeat after me.

I, Spencer Reid, take you (y/n) (y/l/n), to be my wife. Giving you my promise to stay by your side, In sickness and in health, in joy and in sorrow. I promise to love you without reservation, Laugh with you and cry with you, Grow with you in mind and spirit Always be open and honest with you, and cherish you for as long as we both shall live”

Spencer followed each sentence looking directly in my eyes. When he had finished he slipped the ring on my finger. His thumb brushing the metal lightly.

“Bride, please repeat after me.

I, (y/n) (y/l/n) , take you Spencer Reid, to be my husband. Giving you my promise to stay by your side, In sickness and in health, in joy and in sorrow. I promise to love you without reservation, Laugh with you and cry with you, Grow with you in mind and spirit Always be open and honest with you, and cherish you for as long as we both shall live”

I said the words, slipping the ring on his fingers and holding his hand. I bet I could find all the mysteries of the universe just by holding his hands. 

“ Seeing that no moment is without meaning, we ask that you take this marriage as a beginning of your lives together. May you be fulfilled by each other’s love and friendship. May you be overjoyed by the promises you are about to make and the life together you will create.”, Aaron said. 

We looked at each other, having known the next words signified so much more than they did. It signified the beginning of the rest of our lives and we were happy to take the leap.

“So without further ado, by the power vested in me by the district of columbia, I declare you husband and wife.”, Aaron said, before I turned to see Spencer again he pulled me by the hand, my body almost collapsing against his as his lips found mine.

“you may kiss the bride”, Aaron said in a questioning manner as the crowd laughed and cheered. 

I didn’t care, I was just as eager to get to taste his lips again. His hands traveled in my back getting me closer to him as we kissed. When we finally separated it felt like an eternity after, his fingers intertwined with mine. Penelope quickly handed me the bouquet as we made it down the aisle.

This time the walk was quicker. Our feet in sync as we made our way out. His arms pulled me back to him as soon as we exited. Our lips crashed.

“My wife”, Spencer said proudly, I returned the kiss.

“Oh… okok we have a lifetime for that we need to pull the bride one more time okay lover boy?”, Penelope said playfully when they had finally made it out.

The wedding party all took turns hugging us and congratulating us before Penelope pulled me away. Much to our protest they managed to get me to the side. Taking me back to the bridal room. In there the process was quick, and I was thankful.

As soon as my feet left the high heels I sighed relieved. I normally could go all day with them but even when the ceremony was kept to 30 minutes my shaking knees had put a strain on my heels. I still needed them for the height difference, which is why I had agreed to wear them. Soon Penelope was handing me socks and the high black converse I was going to wear to the reception. I wasn’t going to miss on the dancing and besides the dress was long enough to cover them. What you don’t know can’t hurt you right? I slipped my feet in them as she removed the veil, placing it on the side and undoing my hair. The soft curls falling around me.

“Ok let’s go back”, she smiled.

“Penny”, I said, turning to her, she smiled at me. “Thank you for everything you’ve done”, I said. 

“You’re welcome, I’m so happy you made me your maid of honort”, she smiled. Hugging me by my side she took me to the first floor where Spencer was waiting.

“Hi Mrs Reid”, he said, not wasting time and hugging me again.

“Hi dear husband”, I said.

When Penelope entered the reception we waited a second before making our way in. Everyone clapped as soon as we stepped in. 

When they say your wedding day might be one of the busiest days of your lives they do not lie. 

“I’m starving”, I whispered in Spencer’s ear as we saw another group of people approach us.

“Sweetheart”, the woman said, hugging him. He tensed next to me before he smiled politely. 

“Hi aunt Ethel”, he said.

“Nice to meet you”, the woman said, I shook her hand smiling.

“Nice to meet you too ma’am”, I said. 

She returned the attention to Spencer, furrowing her eyebrows a little. 

“You should have cut your hair”, she said inspecting his hair.

He nodded his head pursing his lips as if he already expected that. I tried not to laugh as she congratulated us again, this time being -politely- hushed away by Penelope who had made her way through the crowd.

“I like your hair like that”, I said, as he snaked his arm around me.

“Thanks”, he huffed a little.

“Ok, Let’s go get some food inside you two before another family member interrupts you”, she said.

“Ugh you are a lifesaver”, I said thanking her as she made our way to the table.

The food was delicious, even more so when Me and Spencer fed each other pieces of it, for a moment forgetting where we were.

“I don’t wike it”, Abby said, taking the piece of broccoli out of her mouth and placing it on top of the napkin.

“Okok no more broccoli for you”, I said, deciding not to push her to have her vegetables today. 

“Well I do”, Spencer said, taking another piece and chewing it with a satisfied hum. The attempt was to make her want to eat some but instead she frowned. 

When we finished our plates the waiters walked around filling the glasses with champagne, and the toasts started. 

Penelope’s who decided to give a really heartfelt moving speech about love and us. The Derek’s who decided to make everyone laugh as he recounted a story of Spencer. 

As everyone settled after the toast Penelope came to us.

“Ready for the first dance?”, she asked.

I looked at Spencer, who despite the practice still looked nervous.

“Yes”, I said holding his hand as she took Abby.

She announced that we were going to start the dance. As we walked to the middle of the tables. I looked at him.

“You can kick me if I step on you”, he said.

“I will”, I joked back, giving him a smile. 

Hozier’s Work song started playing softly.

Spencer placed his right arm around me, holding my hand with his free hand. I stepped closer to him as the lyrics came.

_ “ _ _ Boys workin' on empty _

_ Is that the kinda way to face the burning heat? _

_ I just think about my baby _

_ I'm so full of love I could barely eat _

_ There's nothing sweeter than my baby _

_ I'd never want once from the cherry tree _

_ 'Cause my baby's sweet as can be _

_ She give me toothaches just from kissin' me _

_ When my time comes around _

_ Lay me gently in the cold dark earth _

_ No grave can hold my body down _

_ I'll crawl home to her” _

I felt his hand move in my back, getting me closer as I hugged him placing my head on the crook of his neck.

“ _ Boys when my baby found me _

_ I was three days on a drunken sin _

_ I woke with her walls around me _

_ Nothing' in her room but an empty crib _

_ And I was burnin' up a fever _

_ I didn't care much how long I lived _

_ But I swear I thought I dreamed her _

_ She never asked me once about the wrong I did _

_ When my time comes around _

_ Lay me gently in the cold dark earth _

_ No grave can hold my body down _

_ I'll crawl home to her” _

“I love you”, he whispered in my ear as we swung slowly around to the rhythm.

“I love you too”, I smiled up at him.

_ “My baby never fret none _

_ About what my hands and my body done _

_ If the lord don't forgive me _

_ I'd still have my baby and my babe would have me _

_ When I was kissing on my baby _

_ And she put her love down soft and sweet _

_ In the lowland plot I was free _

_ Heaven and hell were words to me _

_ When my time comes around _

_ Lay me gently in the cold dark earth _

_ No grave can hold my body down _

_ I'll crawl home to her” _

The music started dying out as his lips found mine. The warmth and softness I was so accustomed to, and that I got to call mine. 

I felt someone lightly tap my shoulder.

“I know that legally he is yours, but do you think I can steal my son for one dance?”, Diana asked with a shy smile.

“All yours”, I said guiding his hand to hers.

“Thank you (y/n)”, she smiled at me sweetly.

I smiled back with a nod. I took a step back almost stumbling with someone.

Rossi smiled putting his hands on my shoulders. I smiled back.

“May I?”he asked, extending his hand to me.

I nodded as he placed one hand on my waist while the other one held my hand. The next song started playing as we danced. 

“Is Mrs Reid tired?”, Spencer asked standing behind the chair I was sitting in. I took a spoonful of cake frosting and shoved it in my mouth nodding my head.

“Exhausted, and I guess you can say the same thing about baby Reid”, I said looking at the sleeping girl in my arms.

“How can she sleep like this?”, he asked looking around, the people dancing on the floor while now louder music played. I watched as Emily danced with Morgan laughing as he moved his arms around.

“I don’t know, must have gotten it from you”, I said looking up at him. His bowtie was only hanging around his neck now.

He smiled leaning down and kissing my ear.

“Do you want to get away?”, he asked, I sent him a conspiratory look.

“It isn’t midnight yet, are you proposing we run away from our own wedding?”, I asked as he nodded enthusiastically, making me laugh.

“I think we can arrange that”, I said looking over at JJ and Will who, being parents too, looked exhausted. Then at Aaron who had the same expression, they all had rooms in the hotel for the night. Aaron had volunteered to stay with Abby tonight. 

The plan was to have her spend two days with Penelope, but seeming as tonight she was too busy on the dance floor Hotch had said he could take care of her overnight. Penelope had insisted it was okay for us to go in our Honeymoon without her, but there was no way we could go two weeks to Europe and not take her. Instead Rossi had made plans to give two full days for the two of us alone in a cabin and then we could make our way to Italy.

That plan we were okay with, knowing what we wanted to do with alone time, keep in mind we had not been together like that in two weeks, which to us was like a year.

“Okay give me a second”, he said, as he walked to his mom who chatted with Aaron, they both nodded as he beckoned me. I stood up carefully so as to not wake Abby up.

“Thank you”, I said when Diana accepted the girl in her arms.

“No problem”, she smiled.

“And thank you Aaron”, I said he stood up giving me a small hug. 

“Congratulations to the two of you”, he said doing the same to Spencer.

“Mom, we’ll see you when we get back okay?”, he said, Diana was going to spend the rest of the year in a facility in DC, and then she was going to be transferred to Baltimore, which had made Spencer very happy.

“Take care”, she smiled. 

We both kissed Abby, clinging to her a little longer before Spencer took my hand, as we quietly made our way out, only stopping to get the keys from Rossi.

“You two take care alright? make sure you are ready when I pick you up in two days”, he said.

We nodded smiling as he handed us the keys to the car. When we made it in the garage Spencer opened the door for me. Stopping me before I hopped in.

His body pressed against mine pinning me to the car. His tongue making its way inside my mouth as I moaned lightly on his lips.

“I cannot wait to make it to the cabin where I’ll be the one who gets to undress Mrs Reid”, he whispered in my ear, sending shivers down my spine.

“Better hurry then if Doctor Reid wants to make it to the cabin”, I said hopping in the car when I broke his grip. I saw him smile as he walked to the driver’s side.

_ “I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close.” _

―  **Pablo Neruda**

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that was the wedding, not gonna lie I cried a little.  
> I hope you guys enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it.
> 
> If you have not hear Work Song I would recommend you do it while reading because that song makes me so soft I thought it was appropriate.
> 
> Thank you guys for following the story and allowing me to keep creating it! I love y'all so much.
> 
> A disclaimer, next chapter will contain explicit smut.


	41. Chapter 41

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut warning, and I'm sorry I'm not good at writing it lol.

The drive was a little under two hours before we finally made it to the ‘cabin’. In a very Rossi fashion this place was not a cabin at all. I had been expecting a little wooden cottage, instead we found a two floor wood and glass mansion in the middle of the woods. The lights were on inside just like he said they were going to be. Spencer and I shared a surprised look before he parked the car on the driveway.

He got out of the car, running around and opening the door before I even got time to react. I gave him a warm smile as I took his hand to get out. He reached the back seat where our bags laid. 

“I can help you”, I said reaching for one before he moved it away.

“Got it”, he said, bringing my hand up to his lips. I smiled dumbly at the action as we walked to the door. 

Spencer quickly put the alarm code, blocking my way in and throwing the bags inside the cabin. In a fast motion he turned around sweeping me off my feet and carrying me through the door. I giggled in surprise as I hooked my hands around the back of his neck for support. 

“What a romantic Doctor Reid”, I said resting my head on his shoulder.

“Always for you Mrs Reid”, he replied happily. 

He didn’t stop, carrying me inside all the way till we reached a door leading to the bedroom. He walked in, once inside placing me on my feet again.

“Wait here”, he said, putting a chaste kiss on my lips as he exited the bedroom.

I looked around. There were unlighted candles, roses, a bottle of champagne. Right outside the bedroom in the balcony there was a hot tub. I crossed my arms examining the place. Rossi really had gone all the way out. The place was cool enough to be comfortable but not freezing, surprisingly so considering the walls were made primarily of glass. Even in the middle of the woods it was more exposed than I thought it would be. 

When Spencer came back inside he was carrying both bags again, putting them on a chair on the corner of the room. I saw as he walked to the vanity table, taking the champagne and opening it without much effort, filling the glasses that were on the side. He smiled at me through the mirror. He also took a white remote that rolled out the blackout shades. I smiled at him as he walked towards me again. The room now a lot more intimate.

We sat on the edge of the bed, him handing me one of the glasses.

“Mrs Reid”, he smiled clinking our glasses together.

I bit my lip happily before we both downed the glasses.

“You have made me the happiest man on earth”, he said after a second, taking my hand and brushing the ring with his thumb.

“And you”, I said, shifting in the bed, putting my legs over his. “Have made me the happiest woman ever”, I smiled as he leaned to kiss my lips.

I was sure I had kissed him a million times, and yet each and every time I felt my heart grow.

The kiss quickly shifted, after all we had not been together for two long and stressful weeks. His hands placed on the sides of my face as I placed mine in the back of his neck.

When he trapped my bottom lip between his I couldn’t help but have a moan escape my mouth. When I opened my eyes I found his, filled with a burning desire.

Before I could say a word he got on his knees in front of me, lifting the white fabric enough to be able to untie my shoes, taking the socks that protected the white stockings. Once he stuffed the socks on the shoes he stood back up, looking down and liking the view. Because we had been like this before, and if I’m correct my doe eyes looked at him eagerly, waiting for his next command.

“Stand up”, he said.

It was crazy how this man could go from the softest human to the dominant man I came to know and love so well. It wasn’t like he bossed me around just because, it was that he knew what effects his commands had on me. I had never ever imagined bending to someone in this way could do it for me. But being with Spencer in this way, I completely submitted to him, felt right. It had always been this way with us. With him so eager to test my own body’s limits, and me with my body willing to his word.

So I stood up, my legs barely balancing as the back of my tights were on the bed.

“You look angelic”, he whispered, running his hand through my face and examining me. Probably wanting to get this image on his brain forever.

I leaned on his touch tilting my head just a little and smiling at the warmth radiating from him.

“I love you so much Spencer”, I said, the words feeling so right on my lips. 

I felt his hand travel to my chin, his thumb toying with my bottom lip. I poked the tip of my tongue out when he pulled the lip down just slightly. Opening my eyes to see his reaction when my tongue brushed his finger.

I could see how the small movement got to him. Making me proud at the way he took a deep breath. 

“Turn around”, he said.

Painfully slowly, and on purpose I turned around to face the bed. His hand ghosting over the hidden zipper that ran through the dress. I wondered if he actually wanted to get it off, and I understood the feeling. Once off it wasn’t coming back.

After a second of deliberation he pulled the zipper down, helping the fabric leave my body and thump on the floor. I turned around again letting him take a good look at me.

The lace corset was tight against my body, fastened with silk ties in the back. The panties were made with the same lace pattern. The stockings being attached to the latter with clips.

“You are perfect”, he breathed out, extending his hand for me to take and step out of the dress. I blushed but decided to not contest his remarks as I looked at him.

When I did he bended to grab it, he was delicate with the piece of clothing as he walked to the open closet and placed it on a hanger, his hand running through the fabric one more time before he turned around and walked back to me.

He looked at me, running his tongue through his lips as he made a plan on what to do next.

Before he could make his next move I stepped forward, pulling the strip of fabric that had been his bowtie, and working on the vest he was wearing, his coat having been taken away before he stepped in the room. 

I let my hands run through his body a lot more than necessary, him helping me shrug the fabric off.

When my fingers traveled to his shirt he stopped me, grabbing my wrists with his hands and taking them off from him.

“You are mean”, I murmured with a pout. “I just want to see my husband”, I said, knowing the words would just make him happy, and hoping he would let me finish the mission I was set out to do.

“You’ll have a lifetime for that darling, right now I want to worship your body”, he said way too casually.

His nonchalant attitude contrasted with the way my knees shook at his words.

He placed his hand on my shoulder, guiding me for me to turn around one more time. This time there was little hesitance when he expertly undid the knot and untied the corset. His arms going around my body to take the garment off, this one received less of a privileged treatment, being tossed to the side. 

I was about to make a joke about that before his hands came to my breast. A sigh escaping my mouth as his fingers squeezed my nipples slightly. I closed my eyes and threw my head back slightly when he used his thumb to draw circles.

“Spencer…”, I breathed.

He retrieved his hand, leaving the skin hungry for him as his hands now found their way to my waist, his fingers unclipping the stockings and pulling the panties off without any effort. He stayed crouched behind me for a second, his nose making its way up my spine when he came back up.

His lips opened on the flesh of my neck. I could feel his teeth grazing the skin as he sucked.

“Please”, I said now, desperate to feel him in any way. 

Giving in just a little to my pleads he ran his hands to the front of my body, his fingers effortlessly slipping between my folds. 

“Look at you so ready”, he said playfully pointing out the building arousal of my body. As his index finger found my clit he pressed his own arousal behind me. Both things earned a moan from me.

He retrieved completely now, putting his other hand on my shoulder and making me turn around again. I looked at him lovingly, this time my hands not wasting time to unbutton his shirt. He helped me with the shirt while I worked on the pants. The two things out of his body in record time.

“Sit down”, he said, before I could bring my hand to his bulge.

I looked at him a little confused.

“I need you, and if I get inside you right now there won’t be enough time to show my devotion to my wife.”, he explained.

Well I was not about to complain. I knew that once we started things were going to move quickly, and a part of me wanted to drag it out as well. I sat down on the bed. With his hands he separated my legs, kneeling between them.

Oh…

“Don’t stop looking at me”, he commanded.

I took a deep shaky breath, putting my hands flat on the bed on each side of me. 

His tongue ran through his bottom lip, as his hands separated my legs even more. His lips making their way from the edge of the stocking to my inner thigh. His lips placed special attention to the area. One hand left my body to pull his hair back as he ran his tongue through my center. Collecting the juices that had already built up. I cried at the sensation, earning a smile as his eyes looked up at me.

The image was intoxicating, and before I could say anything he buried his face between my legs. His tongue entered me as much as he could as his nose pressed against the bundle of nerves on the crest. I screamed at that point, my body falling back and my hand clenching the covers. He moved up, his lips making an O and sucking on my clit. 

“Spencer”, I said, it was embarrassing how short this was going to be but I needed him. 

His mouth didn’t stop his movement as he buried himself further up to me. I arched my back with a groan.

“Please Spencer”, I said, the bubble building in my stomach.

Him not stopping, and instead flicking his tongue faster was the only permission I needed to let the pressure release from my body. My legs shaking around his shoulders. 

“Beautiful”, he said.

My erratic breath tried to find a footing. My own orgasm had swept me away for just enough for Spencer to have taken his boxers off. 

One more time he took the weight of my body and placed me in the bed, this time with the pillows under my head. I smiled at him when he knelt between my legs again. 

With care he bended over me, placing his lips right under my breast. His mouth moved around. Kissing, nibbling and sucking the skin. Making its way back down. 

My body shook in anticipation. I didn’t know if I was able to do it twice in a row. Certainly not today. I may have misinterpreted his actions though, because his lips stop right in the little bump of my tummy. Placing the most delicate kiss in there before making its way back up. This time faster, his lips leaving wet spots all the way to my neck. 

When I saw his eyes again they were a mix of possessiveness arousal and love. The hazel color barely visible, overtaken by the dilated pupils.

“Oh God”, I said when I finally could breathe properly.

He smiled proudly, bringing his head down and giving me a kiss. The sweetness of his lips corrupted with the salty taste of me. I put my hands behind his neck again.

“I need you Doctor Reid”, I said bringing my hips up to him seeking the friction.

He smiled and kissed me again. This time he brought his body down, with one hand he guided himself to my entrance.

My eyes shut in anticipation.

“Look at me”, he said again, my eyes managed to open and seek his. 

“I love you”, he said. I was either going to explode from the need or from the way my heartbeat changed at his words.

“I love you”, I echoed.

“My wife”, he said, as a reminder to himself as he buried himself in me, I let out a long moan as his mouth found mine.

My lip locked once again between his as he started to move so slowly. The touch tender and caring for a little bit. Both of us took our time to enjoy the feeling of our bodies joining, but soon his pace started increasing. My legs wrapping around his waist as an invitation. 

It was all that he needed to start moving. His hips moving to meet mine each and every time getting a reaction out of me. I was crazy how even in this position I could feel tight around him, my body totally open to him yet clenching to him in any way I could. I couldn’t help but dig my nails on his back as his lips made their way to my neck. My whole body glued to his as our moans filled the room.

“You feel so good”, he said, bringing on hand to my hip and lifting it off the bed, placing a pillow in my lower back. The new added support helped him reach the deepest part of me. 

I let out a loud moan now, his pace faster by the second. When the same hand snaked between us, not stopping and making it to its destination I yelped. His thumb circling my clit.

“Spencer”, I cried out his name, “I’m gonna… come too soon”, I said with a groggy voice as his rhythm didn’t stop.

Instead of stopping he buried himself deeper in me. My hands trying to touch as much of him as possible.

“I need you”, he said against my neck.

“I need you too”, I replied, closing my eyes forcefully as my orgasm rose on my tummy.

“Come for me”, he said, the words cutting through me like a hot knife through butter.

With an increased pace now my back arched against the mattress, feeling the tension explode within me. My heels burrowing on his lower back as he continued moving in and out. The overwhelming sensation made me moan louder. When his orgasm finally came he buried himself completely inside me with a groan. The hot liquid filled me as his pace decreased until it ceased. 

He let his body fall completely on me. and I didn’t complain. My hands brushing his head as he came down from his high. I managed to somehow put the slightly cramped legs back in the bed. My body creaked at the new position.

Spencer, who at this point knew me better than me, removed the pillow from under me. My back is thankful for the straightness. Backing down he ran his hands through my thighs, pulling down one by one each stocking, his fingers kneading on the tense muscles.

I groaned at his ministrations, earning a smile from him.

“Can you stand up?”, he asked. 

Now that the satisfaction filled me I was super tired. Extremely tired.

“I think so”, I said, he stood up. 

Leaving my sight he moved to the corner of the room where I heard him opening the go bags. I sat on the bed, straightening my hurting back.

When he came back to me he helped me put on the silk robe I had packed. Him wearing pajama bottoms already. 

“I could get used to this”, I mumbled when he carried me bridal style to the bathroom, sitting me on the toilet seat.

“You better, because I’m not letting you walk alone through a door ever again”, He joked, on the counter I noticed my toiletry bag.

I smiled softly when I noticed him taking the makeup wipes and micellar water out. With all the care in the world he ran the cloth through my face. Collecting what makeup remained there. His touch was so soft I could melt into it.

He avoided the eyes, instead giving me a new wipe for me to do it. I accepted it, pressing it against my eye and giving it time to soak the makeup.

Through my other eye I saw him smile and chuckle.

“What is it?”, I asked, moving the wipe away and rubbing my eye with it.

“I wanted our first time as a married couple to be… softer”, he explained as I started working on the other eye.

“I’m not complaining”, I said confidently as I finished removing the makeup. Once I threw the dirty wipes away I stood up, Spencer standing up with me.

“I’m not either”, he smiled too.

“We’ll have a lifetime for that Doctor Reid”, I said repeating his words from earlier as I ran my hands through his chest.

“Today?”, he asked. The surprised if not horrified tone made me laugh.

In a normal night our refractory periods would have been so much shorter. Right now all I wanted was to cuddle with him in bed.

“No not today, tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after”, I said, placing small kisses on his lips.

“Sounds like a good plan”, he nodded his head.

We both walked to the sink. Me reaching for the toothbrushes and toothpaste. Brushing our mouths as we looked at each other through the mirror. He finished first. Giving me time to run some water through my face. I felt him walk behind me. His arms hugging me close to him as his hands made their way inside my robe. His hand possesively placed in my lower abdomen. I smiled leaning onto him before he applied the smallest amount of pressure and my eyes shot open.

He had been examining my expression and now looked confused.

“You need to get out”, I said quickly. His eyebrows furrowed on his forehead. “I need to pee”, I explained. 

He nodded, he had seen me do it before, but for the sake of romanticism he left the room without protest.

Once I finished I walked out, The quilt that was on the bed previously now rolled on the edge of the bed. I made a mental note to do laundry before we left. Spencer was already under the blanket, waiting for me. Happily I got under the covers. The room is much colder now, and I wondered if it had been this cold before.

Still, we didn’t need to adjust the thermostat, because the heat radiating from both of us as we hugged was enough to sustain us.

“Thank you”, Spencer said running his hands through his back.

“What for?”, I asked him running my own hands through his chest.

“For being you, for loving me, for letting me marry you, for giving us our amazing daughter, for listening to me.”, he started listing things.

A wide smile placed on my face as I looked up at him. He looked down at me. I loved that man so much, how could I love somebody this much?

“You’re welcome”, I said instead of giving him the list of reasons why it was impossible not to love Dr Reid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys like this intimate moment of the couple, I wanted to switch it up a little.


	42. Chapter 42

“Now breathe out, and resume position”, the woman says. The group let out an exhale and went back to the sitting position. “Ok that is it for today! Everyone have a great weekend. I hope to see everyone back next week”.

With that I turned to the woman next to me as we both folded our mats back. 

We continued the conversation we were having throughout the sesion, her telling me all about her new side assignment of training young FBI cadets. She seemed happy to have the extra responsibility, it wasn’t a surprise to anyone when she had been selected. 

“It feels good to be doing exercise that isn’t federally required”, she snickered.

I smiled as we made our bags, both of us swinging small towels around our necks and walking out.

“It feels good just to be out of the house”, I said, as we put on our coats and walked out to the very cold night.

“I bet, like I know Abby is a sweetheart but I bet”, she said with wide eyes. 

I nodded in agreement as we walked into the coffee shop two stores down from the Yoga studio.

“So how’s work going?”, I asked Emily when she came back to the booth with our drinks.

“Same old same old”, she said. “Although we do miss the ramblings of Reid sometimes”, she said.

I gave her a sympathetic smile.

Once JJ had come back from Maternity leave Spencer had left the team, for good this time. It had been a long talk but he had finally decided. 

‘I told you I would be there for our kids back when we were expecting Abby. You and her deserve to have me there’

The words had put an end to a two year long debate on whether he would ever leave his job. He still assisted them in any way he could, and to be completely honest and a little selfish it was great to have him by six pm everyday. He was a lot calmer too, spending his days going through papers, the white crimes division had been very happy to have him back. 

“I thought he was working on the same floor as you guys”, I said sipping from the drink. The caffeine had an instant effect on my body.

“We do, but now he has a limited amount of time to explain stuff to us”, she said.

I couldn’t help but have a smile sprawl across my chest. How could I even tell the woman in front of me that one time we had sex while he explained an unsolvable math problem to me? In my defense he was wearing his glasses and sitting on his desk all concentrated.

“Oh Doctor Reid and his ramblings”, I said rolling my eyes playfully.

“So, now that life is settled, how’s married life?”, Emily asked leaning on the table and taking a spoonful of the tiramisu we were sharing. 

I did a small scowl as I took a bit myself.

“Uh-oh trouble in paradise?”, she asked.

“No, not really. Just that Abby has officially entered the terrible twos”, I said with a tight smile.

“Isn’t that a myth?”, she furrowed her eyebrows.

“I thought so too, and then Spencer explained to me how developmentally kids are going through a lot at that age. Even when Abby isn’t officially two yet she has been really really testing the limits.”, I said, immediately feeling bad for the words coming out of my mouth.

Of course me forgetting I am surrounded by profilers. Emily leaned forward smiling warmly at me.

“I am sure she will be back to being the sweet girl she is in no time”, she reassured me.

“Oh no, the problem is quite the opposite. She wants everyone to do her bidding, and she knows that those hazel eyes and cute smiles could convince the sky to be red”, I said, it was the truth. It was like ever since she discovered her dad wasn’t the only who she could wrap around her finger she decided to test her powers on everyone.

“She is also very clingy, which wouldn’t be a problem if it wasn’t because she has also decided that 24 hours a day is too little time.”, I explained.

“Well she is not the only one”, Emily joked.

“No, but she refuses to take her nap and then is very fussy by night time. The worst part, and don’t tell Spencer this. Was that her nap time was also my nap time.”, I said. Emily laughed, “Seriously I needed my forty minutes of deep sleep on the couch”, I pouted.

“You know what? I don’t know why babies need naps, I surely need a nap in the middle of the day more than a baby does”, she said very decidedly.

“I know, like who decided that at a certain age you didn’t need a down time?”, I said smiling at her as we drank our beverages

“It’s going to be a challenge to coordinate naps when another baby genius comes”, she said after a second.

I shifted on my seat only slightly uncomfortable, again, forgetting I was with a profiler.

“I’m sorry”, she apologized. “Didn’t mean to intrude, just I thought you guys were thinking about it…”

“We are, we are trying and everything”, I said with a smile trying to show that it was okay to talk about another baby. “it’s just… I’m scared”, I confessed.

I hadn’t talked to anyone, not even Spencer about the obvious fear I was having.

“About…?”, she prompted. I looked at her for a second, I could trust her I knew that. It could be good to voice my concerns and have someone else’s opinion on them.

“Well with Abby, things happened so quickly. You know? Like I got pregnant a couple of months into dating Spencer, and don’t get me wrong I loved him. It’s not like she was an accident either, we both knew what we were doing, we both had always wanted kids and we just decided we were perfect for each other”, I said. I saw her nod her head. “With Abby it was quick and easy, and I’m just scared that now that we are actually planning it won’t be that way…”

“You guys haven’t been trying that long”, she said with a small smile.

“I know, I just don’t want to disappoint him, or get my hopes up just to be let down”, I explained.

“I think that’s a rational fear, but you two are young. Besides there are various ways to do things.”, Her words were surprisingly reassuring, it was a rational fear she was right. Right? “I think for now you should definitely enjoy the honeymoon phase”, she said.

“Oh we are”, I said wiggling my eyebrows as I brought the drink to my lips.

She grimaced with a laugh at the words as we shifted the conversation to a less heavy topic.

“I’ll see you next week”, I waved goodbye as we went opposite directions to our cars.

“Bye”, she smiled one more time before walking.

‘I’m on my way home, love you’

I sent the text with an annoying number of heart emojis. Of course Spencer was not going to reply, he didn’t like to text in the first place. Still he appreciated me letting him know and I knew that.

When the phone locked I got too busy looking at the wallpaper. A picture taken in a cafe in Paris. Spencer sitting with Abby on his lap as they both flashed goofy smiles to the camera. They both looked carefree and happy, which had made me want to take a picture of the moment, to my surprise he didn’t complain. I was probably too busy looking at the picture to notice the man before our shoulder crashed, making my bag drop.

“I’m so sorry”, I quickly said, turning around as he bends to get the bag.

“No, my fault I was on my phone too”, he said waving his phone.

“Thank you”, I said when he gave me the bag, a smile on his face.

“My name is Marcus”, he said.

“Oh”, I said a little taken aback. “(y/n)”, I replied.

“Nice to meet you”, he said.

This was slightly awkward, I adjusted the bag on my shoulder trying to make him see the ring on my finger.

“(y/n)”, I heard a voice coming from not too far away. 

I looked behind the man to notice Emily strutting my way.

“Have a good night”, the man said, walking in the opposite direction and readjusting his cap on his head. 

I furrowed my eyebrows, I thought he was walking to the other side…

“Hey I think my keys are in your bag”, she said.

“Oh”, I reacted, fumbling in the bag and pulling out a set of keys. I looked behind me as the man had disappeared.

Emily looked at me with some confusion.

“Oh sorry, this guy and I bumped into each other and he was acting weird”, I explained.

“Weird sketchy?”, she asked looking behind me.

“No, just like he introduced himself and then walked the way he came from”, I explained.

“He could’ve been flirting and then saw the ring”, she said.

“Yeah that must be it”, I smiled, she was right.

“Want me to walk you to the car?”, she asked, my car was on the other side of the street.

“Nah, go home and give Sergio some company”, I smiled.

“Alright, let me know when you get home”, she said waving goodbye again.

“I’m home”, I announced loudly, putting everything aside and kicking my shoes to the side.

“Mommy”, Abby ran to the hallway, throwing herself at my arms. 

I pikced her up, placing a loud kiss on her cheek.

“Hi my little baby, how are you?”, I asked her as she kissed my cheek.

“Good, daddy is mawking a sawish”, she explained. 

“Oh is he now?”, I said walking to the kitchen where Spencer indeed was making a sandwich.

“Hi”, He smiled, walking towards me and leaning for a kiss.

“Hello dear husband”, I said, watching his eyes grow.

“Do you want a sandwich?”, he asked, returning to the counter.

“Yeah”, I said nodding.

“How was yoga?”, he asked.

“It was fine, I’m just a little sore”, I said, he shot me a look. “How were things over here? was daddy good?”, I asked Abby.

“No”, she said decidedly, I looked at Spencer whose jaw dropped.

“What do you mean no? I let you have apple juice and popcorn”, he said.

“Daddy bad today mommy”, she complained to me.

“Ugh, what are we going to do with him?”, I said, rolling my eyes, making her laugh a little.

“Give me kisses perhaps?”, he asked, coming back to us and puckering his lips.

I gave Abby a look before we both kiss a cheek each. He hummed happily. He handed us each a plate with a sandwich.

“Mommy can I watsh?”, she asked, pointing at the tv.

“Okay, but as soon as you finish eating we are getting you into bed okay?”, I said. She nodded happily as I put her on the floor. Her struding to the living room and watching the cartoon on it.

“How was she?”, I asked Spencer now.

“Good, you were only gone for an hour”, he said. “Everything was good.”

I smiled at him, as he leaned to kiss me.

“I’m not going to work tomorrow, I’ll do my work from here”, he said.

“Oh, why?”, I asked him biting into the sandwich.

“Well I know how difficult this past week has been on you, So I requested if I could do my work from here so you can sleep in”, he gave me a small smile.

God I loved this man.

“I was thinking maybe I can get my mom out for the weekend and the four of us can decorate for Christmas”, he said a little shyly.

“I love that idea”, I said, hugging him by the neck now.

“yeah?”, he asked now with a smile.

“Yeah, we can build gingerbread houses and watch movies”, I smiled widely at the idea.

“Have I told you how much I love you?”, he asked, his hands rubbing my back.

“Occasionally”, I said playfully.

“I love you”, he said, kissing me, his hands traveling to my lower back and pushing me against him. 

I looked over at Abby, the kid was probably sleeping as soon as we put her in bed.

“Hey Spencer”, I said slowly, he looked me in the eyes waiting for me to say whatever I was about to say. “Any new developments in the Riemman hypothesis?”, I asked.

It was an immediate effect, his pupils dilated as his eyes traveled through my face. His mind traveling back to that one night, me bent over his desk as he rambled away. What can I say? Emily had put the image in my brain, and the weekend was probably going to be kept PG13.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo how's everyone doing?


	43. Chapter 43

My feet bounced up and down on the tile. The food I had eaten settled like cement on the bottom of my stomach. Of course it did, I had eaten two cheeseburgers on my way here, stopping at two different locations because right after having one I was craving the other one. That was not the only weird thing to happen to me either. It was almost the end of february when I started waking up dizzy. My head pounding on my cranium and my stomach turning. Then march had been a mess, I was so tired. So tired that I just fell asleep anywhere and anytime, which with a toddler at home wasn’t a good idea. My appetite had changed to junk food, which Spencer had noticed but didn’t complain since he himself enjoyed them. My senses had also spiked, for some reason. I used to love the smell of cinnamon and now it was offensive, anything that was previously mild became pungent. The taste of my toothpaste made me gag now. 

That’s what prompted me to come here, to the hospital. I had a pregnancy scare in January and after several negative tests and disappointment I decided to try and not get my hopes up. I had a bad feeling about this, and it could turn out I was sick. I tried not to think too hard about it. My hands clenched on top of my lap as I looked down on them. I was trying to control my breathing when I heard a door open.

“Mrs Reid we are ready for you”, the nurse gave me a polite warm smile while I took my bag and walked in.

“Hello, Mrs Reid, please take a seat”, the doctor smiled at me, pointing at the seat across from him on the desk.

“Hi”, I smiled politely while sitting down.

“So, we got your test results back”, he said, grabbing two envelopes and quickly opening them. His eyes traveled through the paper while he spoke.

“You said that the reason for your visit was that you felt unwell?”, he asked.

“Yeah I have been having some stomach problems, and feeling under the weather in general.” I explained, my fingers fidgeting in my lap.

“Under the weather”, he asked, flipping to see another page.

“Yeah, like I get tired too easily. Wake up with a stuffy nose or with a very strong sense of smell”, I explained. “I suffer from allergies so I know that this is not it… Especially because allergies don’t make me throw up”, I scrunch my nose up.

“Well, that isn’t too surprising”, he said putting the papers down and smiling up at me. “You are pregnant Mrs Reid”, he said.

The words magically made the tension on my stomach dissipate. My smile was growing on my face as one hand traveled to cover it.

“Really”, I said in a whisper, my other hand traveling to my lower stomach.

The doctor gave me a sympathetic soft look. Handing me a kleenex when he saw the tears pooling in my eyes.

“It seems here like you are perfectly healthy. Your physical from two days ago came out clear. Congratulations Ma’am”, he smiled.

I wanted to thank him but the throat on my throat didn’t let me. 

My mind traveled to me, sitting on the bathroom floor with the positive pregnancy test. The time I found out I was pregnant with Abby. 

Abby, she was going to be a big sister now… And Spencer and I would be parents again.

I sobbed lightly, this time the doctor seemed worried, probably at my silence.

“Are you okay ma’am?”He asked.

“yeah, yeah I’m wonderful thank you”, I nodded.

“Do you want us to go ahead and schedule an ultrasound”, he said while writing something down on a piece of paper.

“Mmm yes, but can we wait? I need to tell my husband first”, I explained. 

“Of course. What we can do is give you a call tomorrow to see what day works best. In the meantime, here”, he said ripping the paper and handing it to me. “Here are some vitamins and prescription acids I want you to take, it should help with the symptoms”, he said.

I took the paper as well as the test results he was giving me.

“I see here this is not your first pregnancy, so you already know the dos and don'ts right?”, he asked

I nodded my head with a smile. I needed to get out of here.

“Well, take these brochures anyway”, he smiled. “Mrs Jennings in the front desk will help you with billing”, he said.

I gathered my things and stood up. 

“congratulations”, he smiled.

“Thank you”, I beamed walking out of the office.

I was having a baby, we were having a baby. My hand settled on my tummy when I approached the desk. I was so anxious, I needed to tell Spencer, I needed to tell Abby. The girl at the desk was quick and friendly, congratulating me when she typed on the system the prescription, probably recognizing the medicines herself since she herself was carrying a belly.

I smiled, congratulating her as well as I walked away. My feet moved fast through the hall towards the elevator. I felt so happy, all my worries casted aside.

I dialed the number, putting the phone to my ear.

“You’ve reached Dr Reid”, he said, probably not having read the ID caller.

“Hi Doctor Reid”, I purred in the receiver.

“(y/n)”, he said, a little surprised. “How are you? What's going on?”, he asked.

I rarely called him at work so I understood the reason for his confusion.

“Not much, I’m just missing you so much”, I said coyly into the receiver. Ignoring the glances from the couple next to me.

Yeah I probably shouldn't be having this conversation in a hospital elevator. 

“I miss you too”, he whispered, I smiled. 

There was a second of silence, like he wanted to ask why I was calling but didn’t want to sound rude.

“Are me and Abby expecting you home by dinner?”, I asked him. He had been working a pyramid scheme, and getting home a little later than usual. 

“Yeah, I was thinking maybe we can go out?”, he said now relaxed.

“No, I’m making your favorite tonight”, I said.

“Oh”, he said surprised again. “That sounds good, how’s Abby?”, he asked, he definitely knew something was going on.

“She is…”, I looked around looking for an excuse. “Sleeping right now”, I said.

Part of me felt bad for lying, but it was a little white lie right?

“Oh okay”, he said.

I facepalmed, of course he knew this wasn’t her nap time.

“Whatever it is you and her are planning I’ll find out”, he said.

I smiled widely now, okay maybe he wasn’t a genius after all.

“yes you will. Love you Spencer”, I said.

“You too”, he said, and I knew he probably had someone within earshot. 

Still I smiled at his words, walking out of the elevator and hanging up. I dialed the next number.

“Will Hi! I’m on my way right now, no more than fifteen minutes”, I said when he picked up.

“Oh that’s okay, I won’t be getting Henry from school for another two hours”, he said. 

“How is she?”, I asked him, looking both ways before crossing the street.

“You know she is always good. We are playing outside while Michael takes a nap”, he explained.

“Thank you again for babysitting, do you want me to pick up some food for you?”, I asked.

“No thank you, and you are fine it’s no problem”, he said, I could hear Abby laughing in the background.

“Ok then, see you”, I said hanging up.

Abby had woken up and didn’t even want to change. It had taken me all morning to convince her to dress, and when she also refused to get in the car I knew I probably wouldn’t be able to have her at the hospitals. She, like her dad, hated hospitals a lot. So I had to call Will to see if he could babysit while I went to get the results. The man had agreed immediately, saving me a lot more than he thought.

There was no way the smile on my face could disappear as I walked to the parking lot with my car in it. I opened the doors with the remote, opening the backdoor to put my bag inside. 

I checked my phone once more before I was going to open the front door. 

It was like something deep inside me knew it. I looked up, through the reflection of the window I saw a man wearing a dark hoodie walk towards me. I hurriedly opened the door, the door janking shut again by the force of his arm. I was about to kick back when a phone came into my line of vision.

My whole body was on edge, I pressed on the keys on my hand, the keys dropping to the floor when he took my phone out of my hands.  
“I will think about what you are about to do before you do anything”, he said. I looked at the image playing on the screen. 

Will and Abby played in his backyard, Abby bending down to collect snow. My mind clouded as my heart dropped.

“One call and she is gone”, he said.

No..

“Please”, I pleaded, the tears already falling on my face. “Please don’t… I’ll do anything”, I said.

I felt a hard object on my ribs. A gun.

“Come with me, do not make a sound”, he said.

I tried, I really tried to think about everything Morgan and Spencer had taught me, but I couldn’t think, my mind was completely empty. I could hear my heartbeat on my ears.

When we made it to the van I remembered something.

Extraction points are one of the easiest moments to escape…

Ok, If I could do anything that Morgan had taught me I could get him unconscious, I could escape.

But he had a gun, and I’m pregnant. Most importantly, he had someone else who also had a gun and was so close to Abby…

I tried turning around, he must have known that because as he swung the Van’s door open I felt a cloth against my nose and mouth.

A very chemical smell filling my lungs. I tried to scream, my eyes growing bigger. 

I was out before I could do anything.

Darkness.


	44. Chapter 44

“I swear is like everytime I try to get a weekend just for myself something happens, and this time I even had my costume paid and everything”, The woman said, as she stole a piece of orange chicken from the other blonde who was comfortably sitting next to her.

“Well, maybe stop signing up for conventions that are three hours away?”, she said chuckling.

The room was normally quiet, which is strange considering that the walls were covered floor to ceilings in technology. The different trinkets and happy pictures there to remind her the beauty of life. So many years in this job and she was still an optimist, she still believed there was good in people. She chose to believe that. 

The room was quiet as they ate, so it wasn’t hard to miss the blaring alarm coming from one of the screens.

“What”, she said, putting the take out box to the side and leaning over, typing something on the keyboard.

JJ knew her enough to know her expressions like the back of her hands. That’s why, when her face fell from confusion to horror, she knew this wasn’t good news. 

“Pen?”, she asked as she saw her friend starting to hyperventilate.

“(y/n)’s panic alarm went off”, she said standing up and walking out of the room quickly.

“Penelope wait”, JJ called behind her as she opened the Boss’s door.

Inside Aaron and David sat across each other, food on the desk and folders on their laps.

“Garcia”, he said, at first he was about to reprimand her for opening the door in the manner she did, but both men stood from their seats when they saw her expression.

“Sir (y/n)’s panic alarm went off”, she said.

“What?”, David was the first to speak.

“What do you mean it went off?” Emily asked her and Derek had gone out for lunch, and were on the hallway when they saw Garcia hurriedly get into his office. 

They knew the way she swung the door open without knocking meant bad news, they didn’t know how bad.

“It went off It went off”,she repeated.

Derek walked in, putting his hands on her shoulders.

“baby girl look at me”, he said in a soft voice. Her eyes seeked towards him.

“Could it be an accident? She told me how Abby sometimes gets on her phone and makes calls”, Emily asked, trying to make sense of the situation.

“No no, no, the panic button that Strauss provided doesn’t work like that. You press it then thirty seconds later it makes a high pitch noise, you have two minutes to deactivate it. Even if it was an accident she would have deactivated the alarm”, she explained now. 

The gravity of the situation falling in the room.

“Where did it go off? Did you call her cell?”, David asked, leaving the folder he was working on aside and walking with Penelope to her office.

“We need to let Reid know”, Emily said looking at Hotch.

There was a certain fear in the man’s eyes when Emily told him.

“She’s not answering”, JJ said leaving the room, quickly making her way out of the Behavioral analysis unit.

When Emily and JJ walked into the bullpen Spencer’s eyes traveled up. This place was a lot more quiet than his last bullpen, and right now all of his colleagues had left for lunch.

He smiled up at them, a smile that quickly faded when he saw their expressions.

“Spence…”, JJ started, walking towards him.

He took a step back, looking slightly frightened, not as frightened as the way he felt when he heard the words that came out of the brunette shortly after.

“Spencer, when did you last speak with (y/n)?”, she asked.

His face was one of pure confusion. He had talked to her no more than ten minutes ago, he let them know as they gave each other looks.

“What’s going on?”, he demanded to know.

“Her panic alarm went off”, JJ said.

If someone had taken a string, tied it to his heart and then ripped it out, he probably would have felt less pain then. 

His motions were commanded by his brain. His feet getting out of the place, and towards the other room where he hoped to find answers.

This couldn’t be happening. This had to be a joke. Up until the last moment he expected her to be inside the room, with her typical smile waiting for him. But when he finally walked in he saw the team around Penelope as she typed something.

“Kid”, David was the first one to turn around, blocking his view.

“Where is she?”, he asked.

“Reid”, His ex boss took him by the arm, carefully pushing him out.

“No”, he almost growled standing in place. “Where is (y/n)”, he said now a lot more sternly.

“Guys, she was in a parking lot, across Memorial hospital”, Penelope said when the screen showed the circle where the alarm had gone off.

“Morgan, you and Emily head there.”

“ Dave go to Spencer’s house”, he said.

“I’m going with Morgan”, Spencer said, almost walking out before his ex boss took his arm.

“No, you cannot go”, he said.

“I am going”, he yanked his arm away.

“Reid I need you to stay here, there are questions I need to ask.”, he said. 

Spencer knew the protocol. He knew the family of the victim had to stay and answer as many questions as possible to fill victimology. It wasn’t until he connected the word victim to his wife that the situation dawned on him. His eyes grew wider as the fear settled. This time he let himself be taken into Aaron’s office.

“When was the last time you spoke to her?”Aaron asked.

“fifteen minutes ago, she called to see if I would make it to dinner”, he quickly said.

JJ stood on the corner of the room, making attempts to call her.

“Did she tell you where she was?”

“No, she didn’t even mention she was out of the house. She had no reason to be in the hospital.”, he said with a breaky voice.

“Spencer”, Aaron said, looking him into his eyes. The next question was going to sting, “Was Abby with her?”, He asked. 

His eyes traveled up to the man, if Abby was with her, it meant. He started walking out before his best friend stood in front of him, blocking his way.

“Spence…”

“No, Jennifer please let me go. I don’t know if Abby was with her, I don’t know. I don’t know why she lied to me about her whereabouts but please let me go. I need to be out there.”

“Spence we don’t even know what happened, wait for a second”, she said as the man took a step back.

“Guys”, Penelope said entering the room, with her tablet in hand. She flipped it and pressed play on the video. “This was twenty minutes ago”

All eyes watched as the woman walked in, with her phone in her ear. The image was far and blurry, and when the image shifted to show the inside of the parking lot. There was already someone behind her. The cameras barely capture the moment the man shows her the phone, and they both walk out of frame.

“Where’s the rest?”, Aaron asked.

“Abby isn’t with her, where did she come from Penelope?”, Spencer said, his heart beating hard.

“She got out of the hospital and to the parking lot, There are only a number of functioning cameras inside.”

“There has to be something else…”

“I checked most of them are turned off or too old to…”

“There has to”, the man almost shouted.

“Reid calm down”, Aaron said.

“Hotch I can’t I can’t this is my wife and she was clearly taken somewhere and I don’t know where my daughter is”, he said angrily, taking everyone in the room by surprise.

“That is why you need to calm down, they need you”, Aaron said in a matching tone.

JJ who had been looking at the scene, walked away, she herself worried for her own family. A kind of sympathy she could share. She dialed a number and when she quietly spoke in the receiver.

“Spencer…”, Penelope said softly, the man crashed in her arms, letting some tears fall off his eyes.

He felt helpless, there was nothing he could do here. Nothing to find his wife, the woman he loved the most in life.

“What?”, he turned when her friend spoke.

“Will I need you to go get Henry and bring all three of them here right now. Get Jack too, now”, she said. Her face with a distant look.

“Will has Abby, she has been with him for like an hour and a half. (y/n) asked him to babysit, she said she was on her way”, JJ explained. 

Spencer’s shoulders dropped. His daughter, she was fine… Penelope sighed in relief, allowing herself to feel better for a second.

“Why would she leave Abby?”, Spencer asked.

“She said she needed to run an important errand”

“Garcia, go and see if we have any good shots of the man”, Aaron said. “JJ, you and Reid go and wait in the meeting room, we will reconvene when everyone gets here. Our priority right now is to find out who took (y/n)”, he said.

Spencer wanted to argue, he really did. Right now though, he didn’t know what to do, there was nothing to do really. He weighed his options, if he went out he would wander aimlessly, therefore losing time.

The next thirty minutes were agonizing to say the least. His eyes traveled to the clock. She had been gone for one hour, anything could happen in one hour. They had settled his phone on the table, hooked to a tracking device. He had his head between his hands when the door opened.

“Anything?”, he stood up.

The older man shook his head.

“The dog was in his cage, everything was turned off and the alarm was armed. She left the house like she would any other time. We hooked Garcia to all technology to see if anyone had infiltrated”, Rossi explained.

“She was very careful of the security protocols”, he whispered. 

His eyes traveled to the two people behind him.

“We have police canvassing the area, there are also roadblocks and an APB on the van that left the parking lot shortly after she disappeared”, Emily said.

From the way she and Morgan looked at him he knew that there was something else.

“What is it…?”

“All of it points to an abduction”, Morgan stated the obvious. “We found this in the backseat”, he said. 

He handed the man the folder, his eyes traveling through the pages the words hitting him like bricks to his body. He fell into the chair as his mouth opened.

  
  
  
  


***************************

  
  
  


It was the bile traveling up my throat that woke me up. My eyes shot open, and when I tried to use my arms I felt something sharp around my wrists.

That’s when my mind comprehended what happened. I was laying. My body almost thrown on something resembling a mattress, no not a mattress, more like a tumbling mat. My hands and feet tied with zip ties behind me. I tried to use force but the feeling burned in my limbs. I moved my head up, my cheek sticking to the plastic material underneath me. 

I saw a dark figure move on the corner.

“Please…”, I pleaded with my voice coming coarse.

“Please I didn’t do anything”, I cried. “I have a daughter please let me go”, I said.

When there was no response I sobbed. I tried to move again, each movement creating a painful friction.

“Help”, I yelled, in vain it seems. As it didn't get a reaction either. 

“Please I have money, I’ll do whatever just let me go please”, I said.

When the figure moved towards me my knees came up to my front. An instinct of my body understanding my condition and trying to protect my belly. My belly, where I had a life inside of me.

“I’ll give you all the money you want just please let me go”, I cried.

“Do you really think this is about money?”, the man asked, crouching in front of me.

This was one of those moments in which you recognize a familiar face after a second. Somehow my brain had engraved this face in my memory, even if I didn’t know it. This was the guy that approached me outside the yoga studio a couple of months back, the one who left when Emily came back.

We both heard someone calling him from the top floor. My eyes grew wide as he stood up and walked away.

“Please”, I yelled one more time.

RIght before he started walking up the stairs he turned around to face me. 

“Your husband took everything from me, It’s time I return the favor”, he said, leaving the place.

My tears rolled down my face as I shut my eyes. I tried to break free once more

  
  
  
  


_ “I don’t know how you guys do this for every single one of those monsters”, I said, taking a folder off his hands. _

_ “Well, the human psyche might be complex, but once you understand how the general things work everyone falls into certain categories. All we do is find these and then try and decipher what they’ll do next. You begin to understand that most of them aren’t really monsters at all.”, he explained to me, his hands pulling me down to his lap. _

_ “Like a crossword puzzle?”, I asked, he seemed only slightly confused by my question. “Each word gives you a clue for the next?”, I explained. _

_ “Exactly”, he said with a smile. “Like here, look”, he opened another folder as I listened to him, my arms around his neck as I paid attention to the words coming out of him. _

  
  
  


That had been a lifetime ago, we had only known each other for a couple of months and we were in his apartment.

I forced my brain to remember as much, from as many conversations as possible.

The man was definitely Mark Griffin, the killer who had escaped prison. I just didn’t know it before. 

He had definitely been following me. I tried to think like Spencer would. The first question came to my mind. Why kidnap me now? 

I had been at the park with Abby yesterday, I had parked the car in an isolated area. I had been outside of my house with Abby a lot in the past few days. Was Abby here? No no she couldn’t he wouldn’t… I looked down at where I was.

He is showing remorse, mercy, I’m on a tumbling mat while the floor is dirt. He could have thrown me on the dirt floor but he didn’t. He could have killed me before but he didn’t. 

I’m definitely in a basement. It’s cold and dark and moist in here. I looked at the stairs when he came back down. This time someone is following him.

My breath caught. Please let him come empty handed.

“I’m sure, he and the kids left in a hurry”, he said one more time. 

Were they talking about Will?

“help”, I said, I knew it was hopeless, so did they. Whose smile grew on their lips.

“Now what?”, the unknown man asked.

“Now we wait”, Mark said, I saw him put his hand in his pocket.

“Well, I think I have a way of spending the time”, he said.

As he walked towards me I tried to move, my ankles and wrists making friction with the plastic.

“No”, I cried, as he bent down, His hands trying to reach my shoulders. That’s when I heard the gunshot.

Red mist falling on me as his lifeless body dropped right in front.

I screamed loudly in horror.

“Shut up”, he said pointing the gun at me. “I did you a favor bitch, we don’t need him anymore”, he spat.

I watched sobbing loudly as he dragged the body away. Once he came back he had a bucket in his hands. He dumped the contents on me, probably a way to clean the blood. I choked on the cold water, coughing as I tried to regain my breath.

“Let me go”, I cried. “Please I won’t say anything”, I begged.

“You have no idea what he did right? He never told you”, he said, his arms reaching for me and making me kneel on the floor. 

I looked up at him with tears. My position putting so much strain on my ankles. 

“Ruth O’connor”, he waited to examine my expression. “He never even mentioned her did he? He killed her, and he didn’t even say her name?”

When I looked at him there was something I recognized, something so familiar.

“How old was she?”, I asked, based on his expression I was right. He was a parent, he was talking about his daughter.

“It doesn’t matter now, because you are going to die just like her. He’ll have to live his whole life knowing he killed you”, he said, I saw his eyes travel to one corner. 

I followed his gaze, there was hurt on his stare.

“How did he… How did he kill her”, I asked.

  
  
  


_ “So what does a person have to do in these situations?”, I asked him, when he had shown me a case that the BAU had solved a couple of years back. A kidnapping for personal reasons. _

_ “Get them to talk, they need to stall them for as long as they can.”, Spencer’s eyes looked at my face with some sadness, I leaned forward to press a kiss on his cheek, reassuring him I was just being curious. He smiled at me, his way of saying I love you before we were ready to say the words. _

  
_"To give the police time to arrive", I asked, my hands running through his hair"_

_"Yeah, and to make a connection with the kidnappers, if they see their victims as human they have a higher survival rate"_

“I think it is time for us to call him”, he said, clearly trying to avoid my question, but part of me knew he wouldn’t.

“How did it happen?”, I asked.

He seemed furious.

“I don’t think Spencer did anything…”

“He did! He knew the way they operated, as soon as someone got too close they killed them. Still he sent his team down here, five minutes earlier and she would have made it”, he said, I could hear him fighting the tears. His eyes traveled to the same corner of the room.

“It happened here”, I asked.

His silence was like an answer as he dialed the phone on speaker.

Ok, what did I know about him?

Everytime I mentioned Spencer, his frame squared, he got defensive, angrier. He could have kidnapped me with Abby, but he didn’t he chose not to. He blamed Spencer for what had happened, he was in pain clearly. He wanted to kill me the same way they had killed his daughter. There was a secret he probably didn’t know about me, a secret I needed to keep for the odds to lean in my favor.

After the second ring the phone was picked up.

“Spencer”, I shouted before he pointed the gun at me.

“(y/n)! (y/n)?”, his voice made me tear up again.

Please Spencer save me… save us.

“Hello Dr Reid”, Mark spoke bitterly on the phone.

“Please, please get (y/n) back here. We know is you Mark please, we promise you we can get you anything you want, anything.”, he spoke.

I looked up at him.

“Let me speak to her…”, he said. 

He crouched, putting the phone in front of me.

“Spencer!”

“(y/n), are you okay?”

“yeah I…”

“(y/n) I know”, he sobbed. He knew, he knew, but the other man couldn’t know. If he knew I was pregnant he would have more reasons to kill me. He had chosen not to kidnap Abby but I don’t think he would show the same kind of mercy to an unborn baby.

“Where 's Abby?”, I asked with a sob. My goal is to move the conversation, the longer I had him in here the longer they had to track the call. 

“She is here she is safe”

I sighed in relief. She was safe, that was all that mattered. I looked up, at the flaming eyes of my captor. I knew that what had crossed my mind was extremely dangerous. If it worked, I could have a probability of making it out alive. If it didn’t… 

“Spencer don’t leave her side”

“I promise you we’ll find you”

“No, Spencer, do not leave her side, ever. She needs to know how much her mommy loved her”, I was fully crying now.

“She will, you’re going to be okay”

“Spencer you need to be there for her okay? She’s going to need you. She is so small she is going to need you to guide her. I know it’s going to be hard, I know Spencer. We promised she would have a better childhood than us, and you need to do that for her."  


“(y/n) please” I could hear his broken voice through the phone.

“You are going to need to protect her, and you two will need to grow together. She’s going to make mistakes, and so will you”, I sobbed, unable to keep speaking. I took a deep breath “But I know you will be there for her and she will be there for you.”

“I will get you back okay I promise”, he said.

“Spencer I need you to say that you understand. That you will continue living for her, for our little one”, I bit my lip to avoid another sob.

“I will”, he said. I nodded my head.

I closed my eyes forcefully at the words. I needed to say them as clear as possible, no margin of error.

I cleared my throat and took a deep breath.

“Spence", I paused a little longer than necessary "She cannot know this was your fault”

When I opened my eyes I looked up at the man. I could almost make out a smirk on his lips.

“She cannot know how you found me on the dirt floor when you came down here. You are going to be late Spence, just like you were for her”, I said.

I may have pushed it too far.

Mark hung the call up, as the back of his hand made contact with my cheek. My body falling to the floor from the force.

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So! confession time, this fic was supposed to be like 20 chapters long. This was the original plot and it was supposed to happen when she was pregnant with Abby, but then I started liking the story and you guys did too, and I thought this was better. I truly hope you guys find these chapters interesting, thanks for reading.


	45. Chapter 45

‘She cannot know that this was your fault’

The words hung heavy in the room, all eyes travelling to the man with the headphones in.

The headphones were just a way for him to concentrate on the script he had to follow, but the conversation was heard by everyone.

“(y/n)?”, He exclaimed when the call was disconnected, he took the headphones off, throwing them on the table.

“Garcia?” Aaron asked, turning to the woman.

“Working on it”, she said typing on her computer.

“Kid”, Morgan said when Spencer stood up, leaving the room.

“Spencer, sometimes people under these circumstances say things they don’t really mean”, Emily followed them both out.

“She may be under pressure, maybe he told her to say it”, Morgan tried his best to rationalize. He tried to make his friend know that this in reality wasn’t his fault, it was clear he already thought so before.

“No”, Spencer turned to them, his eyes red. He walked back in the room, the two people sharing confused glances before following him.

“(y/n) doesn’t call me Spence”, he said. It was like it had taken his brain a minute to process the conversation, and now it was clear to him.

There were eyebrows furrowed, it was unlikely she had never used that nickname for him. When he noticed the empathetic way everyone looked at him he continued.

“She calls me Spencer, or Dr Reid when she is happy or Reid when she is mad. Not once have I heard her call me Spence, not once”, he said now a little frustrated.

“So it was a message?”, JJ was the first to entertain the idea.

“She said when you come down here and find me on the dirt floor, that is very specific”, Rossi said.

“She is in a basement”, Aaron nodded his head.

“She also said you’ll be late just like you were with her, what does that mean?” Emily said.

“Guys”, all eyes turned to the woman sitting behind the screen. “He is not trying to hide location, I mean, the signal, it bounced off of two towers but he is giving us a ten mile radius, pretty isolated too.”

“He wants us to find them”, Rossi said.

There was a knowing look between the older man. 

“Garcia can you search for kidnapping cases, in the same area, go back five years ago”, Aaron said.

“Try with women, and kids.”, Morgan added.

“Oh”, she said after the computer beeped. “We have a Ruth O’connor, she was kept in a basement of an abandoned warehouse, right in the middle of the zone”, she said.

“Any connection to Griffin?”, JJ asked her

“Where?”, Spencer asked

Her concentrated expression fell. “Yeah, he and the mom of Ruth were neighbors with Griffin’s supplier. He lived there periodically but never officially which is why the connection was never mde.”, she read. 

“Her death could have been the trigger we never found”, Morgan said.

“Yeah yeah, it seems like the kidnapping was around the time he started killing his coworkers, and the death on when he started killing civilians”

“Garcia send everyone the address, let’s go”, Aaron said, as everyone started exiting the room.

Spencer quickly walked out, right behind Hotch.

“Spencer you need to stay”, Aaron said when he noticed the man.

“I’m going”, he stood his ground.

“No, Spencer Abigail needs you here”, he said again, trying his best to sound authoritarian.

“Hotch please, I cannot stay here while she is out there fighting for her life. She is the love of my life Hotch I cannot sit still, please let me go”, He said, a plead or a prayer for his ex boss.

His face twisted, the conflict clear on him.

“Spencer you are too close to this we need to be careful…”

“I’m going, I’ve made my decision. The only thing we are doing here is wasting time, we need to go”, the man said, walking past him to the stairs.

******

He removed the water bottle, water falling on my already damp body. The fingers remaining on my jaw, so forcefully I was positive he was leaving bruises.

“How old was she?”, I asked once more, he looked at me with hatred in his eyes.

“Three”, he finally replied.

“She was just a little baby…”

“I should have died instead of her”, he said, I sensed a hint of sobbing in his voice.

“You should have…”, he sent me a death glare. “Because kids should never pay for the mistakes of their parents, ever”

“She paid for what YOUR husband did”, he growled.

“I’m sure she was a great kid”, I said, trying to move the conversation away from Spencer. “At that age they start to think they are independent but they are not, they are still so tiny and the world is so big.”

“Shut up”, he said, the gun coming to my forehead.

“It’s our job to protect them and their job is to be kids, but they don’t know that, they crave responsibility and maturity, and you just want them to stay small like that forever. Thinking that at least they can be safe in your arms”, I continued, without skipping a beat and without breaking eye contact.

“I said shut up”, he said, this time his hand made contact again with my face. 

My body was kneeling, once again crashing on the ground. This time though, I was so close to the edge of the mat that when I fell my entire body fell out of it. Only from the knees down remaining on the soft surface, everything else falling hard on the dirt floor. Most of the blow taken by my abdomen. 

No

I sobbed loudly, yelling when he dragged my back to the mat by the restrain on my ankles. 

I let myself cry this time, the pain on the scratched side not nearly as strong as the fear that drowned me. Through tears I saw him walk back to the corner of the room, completely ignoring me. Everytime I tried to break free my wrists ached. For the first time I let my brain slip.

I’ll die here…

There are so many things I wanted to do, so many things I needed to do. Everytime I held Abby I should have held her for a little longer, every time I kissed Spencer I should have let my lips linger just a little more. 

******

Spencer watched through the window, the place where his daughter was. The kid was drawing on a piece of paper surrounded by her cousins. She was so oblivious of what was happening. He walked right before she looked through the window, missing her dad completely. 

‘She has to make it’ he repeated himself. 

“Spence”, JJ called him, walking behind him as they made their way to the car.

“Spence”, She called him again.

He stopped completely, looking at her. He didn’t want encouragement, he wanted to get her back.

“I don’t think you should come”, she confessed.

“I am not leaving her out there JJ I’m not, she needs me”, he sobbed now.

“Abby needs you too Spence, and you need her”, she said softly.

“I can’t lose her JJ, I can’t. I don’t know how to live my life without her”, he cried.

Once the other people got to the parking garage, he turned around and climbed on a car.

Going as fast as they could while still being safe, yet it felt like they never would make it.

Aaron and Rossi, who were in the car with Emily looked at each other. Then the phone rang.

“Penolope”, Rossi said, prompting the woman to speak.

“I dug the file from Ruth’s rescue attempts, and… this is not good”, she said.

“What do you have Garcia?”, Aaron asked.

“Well the thing is that Ruth’s mother was in the site when the police and FBI went in, at the time Gideon and Spencer were taking her to the police department when they got a call saying they had a location. When they got there shots were fired, but they weren’t Ruth’s they were the captors”

Rossi looked up to Aaron in fear.

“What do you mean?”, Emily asked.

“Ruth had been dead for three hours when they found her, the shots that were fired when they got there they were the captor’s committing suicide. That’s not all, Ruth’s mother, Amelia, tried to file a complaint for neglect, but the police never accepted it. She was internalized shortly after, for depression.”, She continued.

“Where is Amelia now?”

“She killed herself in the facility, in her note she said that there would be no justice, saying that the people who did this were above the law.”

“So Mark believed her”, Aaron said.

“Let me guess Amelia’s death was the reason Mark escaped?”

“It seems like it”, Garcia said. “Guys… What does this mean for (y/n)?”

Everyone in the car shared a knowing look, this wasn't good news, not at all.

Rossi hung the call, unable to answer the question.

“We cannot let Spencer go in”, he said after a second.

“He won’t back down…”

“Aaron we cannot let him go in, you better than anyone knows what he’ll find when he goes in. He cannot see that, if not for him for his daughter.”, Rossi almost pleaded.

Emily bit her lip trying to contain the tears.

“(y/n)’s smart, maybe she can get inside his head…”, she said.

“Maybe”, Aaron nodded.

Deep down he knew that the probabilities were low, and that David was right. Spencer didn’t deserve to remember his wife like that.

They finally made it to the field, parking and getting out as silently as they could.

******

I don’t know how much time had passed before he came again. Pulling me up so I could kneel. I yelped at the pain as he crouched in front of me.

“They should be close”, he said, brushing my hair away from my face with the point of his gun. I looked away with a sob. 

“My daughter’s name is Abby”, I spoke.

He straightened, his posture again angry.

“She is two years old”, I sobbed.

“I don’t care”, he spat.

“The other day, while I was trying to get her to take her nap I held her in my arms. She told me she loved me, without me prompting her she said the words. You know people say that kids repeat what they hear, and they say the things they are supposed to. This time, for the first time I knew she meant it, she wasn’t just repeating the words she was saying them to me.”

I saw how he frustratedly rubbed his hands on his head.

“I kept her in my arms, the entire time she napped. You are not supposed to do that, it can lead to attachment issues. I know that, but I couldn’t let her go. My little girl, The little girl I gave birth to, in my arms sleeping so peacefully. She isn’t so little now, not like she used to be, and she wants to be independent but it breaks my heart. Because deep down I’m scared of what the world would do to her. I promised to be there for her, to protect her, but I cannot be there for her forever, and that hurts me more than anything else could. While she was in my arms I couldn’t imagine seeing her grow up, go to school, go to college, become her own person. I always thought I was going to be there for her, like a mom is supposed to be”, I sobbed closing my eyes. 

At this point I didn’t know if my words were for me or for him, but they had an effect on both.

“I never had that, and I promised myself she will. Of course you never know with life, but still I let myself think about it. I let myself pray that my little girl would never be scared, would never be alone. Being alone is so scary.” My face was completely wet when I looked up.

The sob on his lips was almost quiet.

“If I knew that you killing me, will bring back Ruth. If I knew that this would give her all the opportunities she deserved. I would tell you to pull the trigger myself.”

He seemed pissed at the mention of his daughter, that’s when we heard the sound of cars outside. We both looked behind him.

I saw as he loaded the gun, putting the safety off and pointing it at me.

“I’m sorry you’ll have to live your whole life knowing there was nothing you could do. I cannot imagine living a life in which Abby isn’t there”, I said.

When I closed my eyes I tried not to think of Abby, of Spencer, of my own mother. Of the people I loved, the people that shared my life. I tried not to think about my own daughter, growing up without me. Or Spencer, would he move on? Would he ever truly forget me? The life that was inside me, the one that would probably never come to be.

I pushed the memories away, memories of tears, and laughter. Memories so distant it seemed like they were someone else’s. I had been lucky to have what I had while I could.

If there is another life, would they be there? Would I ever see them again?

I hoped so, I hoped I got to hug them, to tell them how happy they made me. 

The last thing I heard was the explosion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok I cried when I wrote this.
> 
> I love you guys, and thank you so much for following this story.
> 
> PS. The reason why I uploaded so quick is because is my sis' birthday this weekend and I probably won't have time to write.


	46. Chapter 46

Too late.

When someone works around guns they know that the sound comes too late. Once the explosion reaches your ears the bullet has already sealed its fate. The world was cruel like that, a play of catch you would never win. A race you started when there was a finisher on the line.

Everyone outside the abandoned warehouse knew it, the sound reaching their ears. Yet the sun continued setting, and the world continued spinning. Not stopping for a second to turn and see what had happened. The people standing didn’t stop either.

The closest to the door were Morgan and Rossi, accompanied by some uniforms. Morgan was the head of the rescue attempt, Rossi had volunteered to go in first too. When the sound hit them Rossi left all protocol, entering the building at once. Morgan yelled for him, he tried and failed to keep protocol even when he himself was shocked by what had happened.

Emily was closely behind, she led the second wave of uniforms that was supposed to go in. When the sound hit her she stood there in a state of shock, mouth open and teary eye as she thought about her friend.

Her friend who was being held by the boss and his best friend, both trying to convince him to stay outside. When the sound got to the three of them Spencer launched his body. The screams escaping his body were not nearly as frightening as the tears. Aaron tried, he tried to restrain him with his body, but it was in vain. JJ had his arm in his hands. He broke free from both of them, running as quick as he could.

Rossi and Spencer both made their way downstairs, quickly, without clearing their path. Running as fast as they could as if they could possibly catch up with the bullet. 

Rossi ran to try and save the young woman with the smile that reminded him of someone long gone. He was running towards the girl who could have been his daughter, and she was in many senses. 

Spencer ran towards the woman he loved the most. On the whole way there he had thought how he could recall every conversation he had with her, since that very first time. Words engraved in his brain, but they were just words. He couldn’t recall the exact feeling of her hands on his, or the exact temperature of her lips, or the softness of her face, or the smell of her hair. It petrified him to think he might never have those things again. That his daughter would never experience those things, traits only reflected on the little girl.

It wasn’t the first time they had come in contact with a scene like this one, trying and failing not to think about what might await them at that basement. 

When Spencer, who somehow got down there first, saw the scene there was nothing that could have prepared him for it.

His wife, kneeling in front of her captor. As a pool of blood formed under him. Her eyes were wide and her jaw hung, clearly in a state of shock. 

He ran towards her, once again breaking protocol. It wasn’t until he was right next to her that she reacted. Her eyes finally met his.

Her eyes, normally full of light, now dimmed as Spencer cut the restraints with his pocket knife. Rossi, who had at least followed some procedure, checked on the two bodies that laid lifeless on the floor. Once he confirmed he called for medics through his radio.

“Spencer”, she said, her voice merely a whisper as he hugged her.

Somehow now that her limbs were free she felt more pain than before. Her arms and legs were unable to move.

Tears fell from the man’s face, as he hugged her. She wanted to return the hug but it was impossible to command her brain to move any part of her body. 

It was a matter of seconds, when her body finally felt the warmth of his. Her brain let her know she was safe. He examined her face again, this time her eyes rolled to the back of her head, letting her whole weight fall on him now.

There was distant shouting. He carried her out, placing her on the stretcher when the EMTs arrived. She could faintly hear the sirens and the voices around her, but her mind slipped into nothingness, and she didn’t fight its pull.

*****

“I’m scared”, I said, turning around.

“I know”, The woman said, stepping closer to me and holding my hand. I only knew she held my hand because I was watching, not because I could feel it. Even if I tried I couldn’t know how her hand felt on mine.

She did look like me, her hair up on a ponytail and a dress similar to the ones I wore regularly.

“Go on”, she encouraged.

I stepped in, making my way down to the cold basement. My body shivered before I heard three smaller voices behind me.

“Daddy”, the girls said excitedly, passing around me as they went to hug their dad. 

I saw as Spencer lowered himself, with something on his arms.

“Hey guys”, he said excitedly but whispering. “You need to be real quiet okay?”, he said.

I stepped closer, suddenly the basement was bright. The three girls, all with his hazel eyes and my smile. 

“Hi”, Spencer said, smiling up at me.

I smiled back, feeling warmth on my heart. When I was close enough to see them, I saw as he held a baby boy in his arms, the kid sleeping soundly.

“I missed you”, I sobbed.

“He misses you too”, My mom said, walking down the stairs.

I turned to see her and when I turned back, the kids and Spencer were gone. I tried to protest but my mom smiled at me.

“What if I can’t go back?”, I cried. “Abby needs me mom”

“I know she does.”, her hand came up to my cheek, resting it there and wiping away the tears. “I know you needed me too darling, and I’m so sorry”.

“It wasn’t your fault”, I whispered.

“No, but still, I wish I had more time”, she said, bringing her other hand to my other cheek.

“I love you”, I said

“I love you too, so much”, she replied softly.

My eyes opened slowly at first, taking in the bright lights of the room, and then I blinked a couple of times. I opened my mouth, the dryness taking me by surprise.

Luckily one of the nurses saw me. With a warm smile she approached the bed I was in.

“Hi!”, she beamed. “Look at you, awake already!”, she said in a praising manner.

“How long..” My voice came coarsed, I couldn’t even finish the sentence.

“Not even three hours, we have been running tests”, she said.

“I need… water”, I said.

“Or course”, she hurriedly served some on a plastic cup, offering it to me and helping me drink it when she saw how I struggled to move my arms.

“Spencer”, I formed as a question.

“Oh”, she said, her mouth forming a sweet smile. “He has been right outside the door while we run tests”, she explained. “Let me go call him”, she walked out of the room.

I didn’t even have time to ask more questions. I closed my eyes again, my body aching so much.

When I opened them again, Spencer stood on the door.

It wasn’t till his eyes met mine that it downed on me, everything did. Every minute of the day crashing against me, I could have died today.

I looked at him, his hair slicked back from how many times he had run his hands through it. A mess is what he looked like, just like the first time I saw him.

“You look like a mess”, were the words that came out of my mouth, a joke, a failed attempt to lessen the heaviness of the air around the room. 

He practically ran to me, his arms enveloping me. Every one of my senses drowned on him now. I let myself cry, really cry, sob and sniffle and hug him a hard as my weak arms could. 

I was alive, this was real. 

He placed a hand on the side of my head, kissing the other side.

“(y/n) I’m so sorry”, he cried.

“It wasn’t you Spencer, I needed you to understand”, I tried to explain the logic behind my words.

“I know I know, you were so brave”, he cried. 

It felt like an eternity of crying and hugging each other when I asked.

“Abby?”, I looked at him.

“She was getting frustrated, I tried to make her stay but she was bored. JJ thought it was best to take her home with her… I’m sorry”, he said again, his voice falling at the end.

As much as I needed to see her and hold her, I was okay with her not looking at me like this right now. Because from the way my body hurt, and how Spencer was avoiding certain parts of my face I could only imagine how I looked.

One of my arms, the one that had fallen on the ground was completely bandaged up, and the tears stung in some places on my cheeks.

Spencer placed his head on my chest as I hugged him, his ear strategically placed on my heart as I smelled his head.

I closed my eyes, thanking whoever or whatever had given me a second chance.

Slowly but surely I felt his hand creep up on me, resting it on my lower abdomen. 

My whole body tensed up. I was too scared to ask, too scared to accept that he might have taken something from me, something else.

I swallowed hard, closing my eyes and bracing myself for the answer.

“Am I still… Did the baby…”, I couldn’t formulate the question. I couldn’t bring myself to ask if the life inside me had made it.

I saw the exchange of looks between the respectful nurse standing on the corner and Spencer. My heart dropped.

Please, I pleaded in my head.

He looked at me, a soft smile tugging on the side of his lip.

“Both babies are fine”, he said.

The fine part was registered by my brain first, the both babies coming shortly after.

“Both…?”, I asked.

Spencer’s fingers flexed on the place they were positioned, so long they covered the entire area.

He nodded his head looking at me.

Suddenly I understood why they didn’t want me to know straight away. The air struggled to get to my lungs.

“Are we… are they…”, I said, putting my hand on top of his.

He nodded his head again, tears falling from his eyes once more.

“Two?”, I asked softly. 

“Two”, he confirmed.

“And they are both okay?”, I asked between sobs.

“They are”, he said.

My whole body shook now. Two babies, two babies that had made it, two babies that were inside of me. I cried loudly, hugging Spencer.

“Hey”, the nurse said calmly, finally stepping in. “First off congratulations”, she offered a soft smile, “I need you to try and stay calm okay?”, she asked. 

I nodded my head, even my heartbeat had spiked from the shock. I was still trembling, I still could not believe it.

“I’m going to go get you something to eat. You need to start eating for the little ones”, with one more warm smile she left the room.

Spencer looked concernedly at the monitor.

“Did they do an ultrasound?” I asked, calling his attention.

He turned and nodded his head. 

“A quick one so they could check on them, they were a little confused when they listened for the heartbeat of one baby and got two different ones.”, he said.

Two heartbeats, right now beating inside of me.

“You were so brave”, Spencer said.

“I was terrified”, I confessed, going back to the crying.

“I know my sweet girl, I’m so sorry”, he said, hugging me. This time our hands remained on my tummy while we hugged each other.

I let myself breakdown again, a mix of grief and happiness I had never experienced before. Letting myself cry my eyes out knowing I was safe in his arms. We were safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!! I hope you guys like this mix of some happiness with angst!
> 
> I hope everyone has a great weekend!


	47. Chapter 47

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Am I going to keep dragging this story just because I have a need to see Spencer with three kids that have his eyes?
> 
> You are correct.
> 
> Thank you guys for reading! I've said this before but I will continue this until somebody tells me to stop!

The early morning had been filled by people coming in and out of the hospital room, checking on me. Including a not so welcomed visit from the police, who were not convinced one hundred percent by the story on how I made it out alive. Needless to say Spencer was pissed to hear them ask me for the third time to recount my story. I understood though, they had found me, alive, against all odds. In a basement with two dead men.

It hurt to remember. I had tried to stay strong but I was terrified, and everytime I made myself think about it I remembered the feeling. The feeling that my life was over.

By eleven am we had been finally left alone for a moment. Spencer, not for a second leaving my side, holding my hand since I woke up. 

“Hello”, Rossi said walking in after knocking. 

I had seen him yesterday, but I begged him to go home when I saw how he looked. My heart warmed when I noticed his worried expression.

“Mommy”, Abby said, Smiling widely when she saw me.

The relief that washed over me was like nothing else I have ever experienced. My little girl, the one I thought I wouldn’t see again. 

Spencer stood up, walking towards them and picking Abby up, placing a kiss on her cheek before they walked towards me.

“You need to be very gentle with mommy okay?”, he warned, before leaning over.

I accepted her in my arms. The kid sitting on my lap as I hugged her and stained her shirt with my tears.

“Shuush shuush mommy”, she soothed, hugging me back. Just like I did when she cried. “Dont cry mommy”, she pouted.

“Oh sweetie mommy is crying because she missed you so much”, I said, kissing her chubby cheek.

“I was with hendy”, she explained, as if that was the reason I hadn’t seen her. 

I kissed her little face, wiping away my tears.

“I love you so much Abigail”, I said looking at her, letting my eyes take every one of her features.

“Wuv you too mommy”, she said. She shifted on me, placing her knees close to my belly.

I saw as Spencer moved to grab her, but I sent him a soft look. I picked her up to place her in a more comfortable place. Letting her hug me.

“Did you have breakfast?”, I asked her. She nodded her head. I kissed the wild curls taking a deep breath full of her.

When I looked up both Rossi and Spencer had tears in their eyes. I smiled sweetly at them, reassuring them I was okay, and in a sense I was, I was with her in my arms and we were okay.

And only okay for the moment.

“How are you feeling?”, Rossi asked softly.

I nodded my head “Better”, I breathed out hugging Abby closer to me.

We heard another knock before the nurse walked in. 

“Dr Reid, we need you to sign some forms”, The nurse explained after sending us a smile.

He looked at me before looking back at the nurse.

“Go”, I encouraged, squeezing his hand.

“Do you want anything to drink?”, he asked with a sigh.

“I guess coffee is out of the question”, I scrunched my nose up.

“I can get you a small cup of decaf”, he said. It was just him caving in to my situation.

I nodded enthusiastically, hoping the placebo would give me the same effects as a regular.

He looked at Rossi.

“Coffee”, he said too. 

“Do you want anything to drink Abby?”, he asked the little girl, his hand coming to brush her hair.

“MMMM choclate”, she said decisively.

I smiled at her. Her eyes inspected my face for a second before her hand came gently to rest on my bruised jaw. My heart dropped, thinking about what could be going on inside her head.

“Do you want to go with daddy and get you some chocolate?”, I asked her. 

She looked up at the man, and then reached her hands up to be picked up. There was some hesitation from him first, looking at me in a kind of questioning matter. Then he picked her up, giving me a small smile before heading out.

I sighed shakily looking as they left.

“So, how are you doing?”, Rossi asked, getting closer to me. 

“I’m good”, I said with my best fake smile.

He looked around with his eyebrows furrowed.

“Who are you lying for?”, he asked, sitting on the chair that was placed next to the bed.

“I’m alive, I’m good”, I said again, more defensively than what I intended.

“Okay, you can keep telling yourself that, but when you are ready to talk I’m right here.”, He said, leaning back and getting comfortable on the chair.

“What do you want me to say?”, I said, the words catching on my throat as the tears build. “I didn’t think I was going to make it Rossi, I really didn't. I spent nine hours thinking about how I might never hold my daughter or kiss my husband ever again.”

“You were so smart, and so brave”, He said taking my hand.

“Everyone keeps saying that, but back there I didn’t feel brave.”, I sobbed. “Now I need to continue my life, and I don’t know how to do that.”

“Aaron told me he came first thing to talk to you about therapy”, he said.

I nodded my head. He had told me about his wife, and what he did after to help himself.

“You start there. You talk and cry until there isn’t anything else bottled up, and then you slowly move on. One day at the time until the day comes you don’t think about it”, he said.

“That day seems so far away right now, and I don’t have all the time. I need to be a mom, soon a mom of three”, When the words were said I couldn’t help but choke on them.

“You need to be you first, always. If you are not you then you cannot be a mom”, he squeezed my hand. Standing up to hug me. “Nobody expects you to be fine right away, and everyone is here for you okay?”, He said.

I nodded my head again.

“Rossi”, I said softly. He hummed. “I need to ask you something, and you need to tell me the truth”, I continued.

He separated a little, looking down at me in wait.

“Is there… Is there any scenario in which we both made it out alive?”, I asked him.

He seemed surprised by my question.

“I don’t think so”, he finally said after a good minute.

I looked at the door just as Spencer walked in. I smiled at the scene, he was bent sideways to hold Abby’s hand as the kid carried a hershey’s bar and an apple juice.

“We got choclate mommy”, she said.

“You did!”, I said trying to sound excited. 

Spencer gave Rossi his coffee, putting the cup holder with the other two drinks on the table before putting Abby on the bed with me. He took a minute looking at my face, giving me a small smile. 

I tried to let my brain soak the words Rossi had told me, making me believe them maybe.

“Are you okay?”, Spencer asked, putting his hands on my thigh.

I looked over at him then at the girl on the backseat. I nodded my head with a small smile.

The smell of home was soothing, after three days in the hospital I felt even more exhausted than before.

“Im gon pway”, Abby said, running towards the nursery.

I turned to see Spencer.

“We’ll need to get her out of there and move her upstairs”, I said, bringing the folder in my hands close to my chest.

“I know, but we have time”, he said. “Do you want to go to sleep?”, he asked.

“Yes please”, I nodded.

He took my hand guiding me to the bedroom. Once inside I walked to my nightstand, placing one of the pictures of the ultrasound next to the framed picture of the three of us. I felt Spencer creeping up behind me, hugging me by my shoulders and kissing my head.

I breathed in heavily, almost melting on his embrace.

“We are going to be a family of five…”, I said.

“That’s going to be, interesting to say the least”, he chuckled. His hands making their way to my belly, where he lifted the fabric of the hoodie to place them there. The warmth of his body was so relieving against my cold skin. He kissed my head again as his thumb rubbed the skin.

“We’ll manage”, I said.

“We will”, he confirmed.

I hadn't had time to freak out about the twin’s bomb yet, but I was sure going to sooner or later.

“You know that only one in two hundred and fifty pregnancies result in twins?”He asked.

I shook my head.

“It does and contrary to popular belief it does not run in families, it is a random event that occurs.”, he continued.

“I want two more girls”, I said. He looked slightly surprised when I turned to face him. “I want you to be outnumbered”, I joked, poking my tongue out.

He smiled.

“I already am”, he said happily hugging me.

“You are”, I said burrowing my face on his neck and placing small kisses on the skin.

“Well, with dizygotic twins, a boy and a girl are the most common, it happens about fifty percent of the time. Although I do want two girls as well”, he smiled, hugging me tighter.

“Although having a little Spencer running around”, I separated myself, smiling at the idea.

“Daddy”, Abby yelled, not a bad yell. The one she did every time she demanded her dad be with her.

“I guess I'm just giving birth to little yous regardless of gender”, I said.

He chuckled, shaking his head.

“In a minute”, he yelled back.

We looked at each other longer than necessary.

“Do you want anything to eat?”, he asked.

I shook my head.

“I’m just tired darling”, I said. “Need to sleep”

“I’ll come back in an hour to give you the medicine for your muscles”, he said. Still he didn’t let me go.

“(y/n)... we’ll be fine, right?”

The fear in his voice was palpable, making my eyes water again.

“We will, all five of us”, I said, sure of the words.

He leaned forward, his lips carefully locking mine in a kiss. Which I return eagerly.

We will….


	48. Chapter 48

“Where does this one go?”, I asked her.

The girl took the star shaped piece of wood from my hand, flipping her cube until she found the spot, and shoving it in when she did.

“Good job, and what shape was that?”, I asked her.

She looked for a second, her little finger tracing the edge of the hole.

“Star!”, she exclaimed.

“Yes Abby! That's a star, you are such a smart baby.”, I praised her.

The genius genes and my background as a teacher had really helped with making Abby a very smart girl. I was not only saying that because I was her mom, but she was two years and five months and the girl was as smart as a whip. She was constantly surprising me with the way her tiny brain associated things. Spencer had said that she did not get that from him, as brilliant as he was he could be very dumb sometimes. Ms Abby Reid was as clever as she could be, too smart for her own good sometimes.

The kid smiled, giving me the cube for me to open it again. I did, letting all the different shapes fall to the floor.

“I’m back”, Spencer announced, walking to the living room.

“Daddy!”, Abby said standing up, I did the same.

“Who’s hungry?”, he said, placing the bags on the table.

“I am starving”, I said.

Even when the pregnancy was just beginning I could tell this was going to be a lot more intense than Abby. 

He picked Abby up, the three of us making our way to the sink and washing our hands. Once we were done we sat on the table.

Abby was sitting between both of us, propped up by a booster seat. Spencer passed around the respective plates.

“Chicken fingers”, he said, opening the smaller plate for Abby. “Double bacon cheeseburger with extra extra extra mushrooms”, he gave me the plate.

My stomach audibly growled when I saw the right amount of mushrooms. I removed the top bun, eating the mushrooms straight. Spencer gave me a weird look before I turned to see him.

“You don’t like mushrooms”, he mentioned.

“I do”

“No… you try to like them, and tolerate them. You always eat just a couple of them.”, he said casually, biting into his burger.

“Well I guess I wasn’t the one who wanted mushrooms today”, I smiled, offering him one. 

He shook his head looking down at the fungi in my fingers. I offered it to Abby next.

The kid looked at it for a second, then looked back at her plate. She grabbed it, shoving it in her mouth without a second thought.

“Mommy no, ew”, she said, taking the mushroom out and putting it on her plate.

I laughed, looking at the face of disgust. I quickly composed myself, giving her the milk that had come with her meal. She accepted gladly, gulping down the contents.

“That was a mushroom”, I explained to her, taking the chewed piece with a napkin and putting it to the side.

“A mushoooom?”, She asked with her eyebrows furrowed.

“Mushroom”, Spencer said slowly, helping her with the word.

“No daddy that’s ew”, she complained.

I laughed again, making her frown at me.

“I’m so sorry baby”, I said, placing a small kiss on her forehead. “It’s okay, no more mushrooms for you okay?”

“Never”, she shook her head.

“Never”, I confirmed.

It’s not like a mushroom was a must in a diet of a two year old. Back when she was born we had decided to, and as long as we deemed possible, be honest with her. Not on things like Santa, but on other things. When there was a food that she didn’t like, but I knew it was good for her she would say she never wanted them, and I would say that we will try a different approach to the food. She didn’t love the idea but now she loved the carrots after I showed her how to dip them in dressings.

I looked over at Spencer, who had an indescribable look on his face. He hurriedly looked away, working on his own meal. The rest of the meal was finished in silence. After he went back to his office, leaving me and Abby in the living room as we returned to playing.

After the big meal it was easy for her to slip into her nap. I covered her with a blanket and looked at the time. Spencer still had one hour of work, still I couldn’t resist myself and walked to the office. Knocking lightly before entering. He had his head buried in a folder. When he looked up his expression softened. 

His new unit chief, Alex Blake, was exceptionally understanding of his situation. I had only met her once and she had been beyond lovely. She herself had stepped down from a field position to focus on her marriage. When she had found out what happened, she immediately arranged everything for him to work from home. A week had passed since I left the hospital, it felt good to have him close. He liked it too.

“Everything okay?”, he asked softly.

“Yeah, I’m sorry if you are busy”, I said, crossing my arms.

“I’m not, come here”, he said, turning on his chair a little and extending his hand to me.

I walked slowly, taking his hand when he was at reach. He pulled me into his lap, my arms hugging his neck.

“Is Abby sleeping?”, he asked.

“Yeah”, I nodded my head and burrowed it on his chest.

“Are you okay?”, he asked slowly. 

“Yeah, are you?”, I asked him back.

I felt his body shift, his arms coming to hug me closer to him as I snuggled. 

“I am”, he finally said.

“Are you?”, I asked again.

This time the pause was longer.

“When you laughed, today at lunch. You hadn’t laughed like that in a while”, he said. 

I looked up at him, at his troubled expression. 

“I’m sorry”, he said.

“Spencer I told you it wasn’t your fault”, I said, bringing my hand to his cheek.

“But it was”, he said with his eyebrows furrowing.

“No it wasn’t-”

“If it wasn’t for me you wouldn’t have been targeted, I put you in danger”, he said. “I put them in danger”, he placed his hand on my belly.

“Spencer, look at me”, I followed his eyes until they met mine. “This was not your fault”, I said again, the words coming out as clear as possible.

“The thought of losing you… I, I can’t live my life without you”, he whispered.

It broke my heart, it broke my heart to think about the things that must have gone through his head. It broke my heart to know that those things were through mine too. I was supposed to feel those things, according to the psychiatrist I had started seeing. I was supposed to think those things in order to forget about them. I couldn’t, I couldn’t let them go, let the feeling of my life ending go. It was like I had the instructions for my life, but couldn’t follow them, no matter how clear they were.

Then there was the part that understood what he was saying, he was scared of losing me, even if I had made it he was scared of losing the person I was. I was too, I had been trying so hard to continue my life to the point that it didn’t come naturally to me. 

So I let myself relax in his arms, actually relax. A couple of tears falling from my eyes when I hugged him. 

“You are the greatest thing that has happened to my life, you hear me? You are the reason I wake up every morning”, he said.

“I love you Spencer”, I replied, the words choking in my throat.

“I love you too (y/n)”, he said, this time his whole body moved in order to hug me. Embracing each other while we cried.

I took my hoodie off, climbing into bed with nothing but leggings and a sports bra. I picked up the book I had been reading, opening it on the page I had left off.

“Did you take your medicine?”, Spencer asked when he got out of the bathroom.

“Yeah”, I nodded my head, sending a small smile to him.

He sent me a similar smile back. Instead of walking to his side of his bed he came to sit on mine. I eyed him over the book.

“What are you doing?”, I asked with a chuckle when he didn’t move.

“Admiring my wife”, he replied.

There were butterflies on my stomach. It seemed like we both needed to cry in his office because after, things just seemed normal again for a second. Even if it was just for a second I was going to enjoy them.

I hummed, putting my book on the table again. “And what is my dear husband thinking?”, I asked him.

He smiled making his dimples deeper now.

“That I love you, and you look beautiful, you have that pregnancy glow going on”, he said, running his hands through my face. I closed my eyes, giggling when he poked my nose with his index finger.

“Is pregnancy glow really a thing?”, I asked.

“Yes it is, there is a greater blood volume that brings more blood to vessels, resulting in skin that looks flushed. Changes in hormone levels might also cause the skin glands on the face to secrete more oil, which can make skin look slightly shinier.”, he said.

“So I’m just greasy?”, I asked with a chuckle again.

He shook his head.

“I wish you could see yourself through my eyes”, he said softly, his expression softening at the words. “How beautiful you look, how pretty you are.”

“Keep talking”, I encouraged closing my eyes.

“You are the most beautiful person”, he said, his lips finding mine. 

I felt his tongue quickly slip between my lips. Normally his kisses were needy, he liked to have the upper hand and he showed it through them. Right now the kiss was gentle, his hands on each side of my face as he devoured my lips with such care I could faint.

“I love you”, I said.

“I love you too”, He smiled. I felt his hands moving the blanket down. 

Me, knowing what he wanted. Layed back down on the pillows, giving him better access but I was still not laying completely flat.

He pulled the blanket down, as his fingers ghosted over the skin of my tummy. Much like Abby I was a little bloated but not yet showing. I wondered how long it would be like that before it was evident that I was having twins.

“Two babies”, he said so low I was sure the words were for him. His fingers traced patterns on the skin.

“Two babies”, I confirmed.

“Hi!”, Abby said, walking in the room. 

We both turned to look at her.

“What are you doing here?”, Spencer smiled, standing up and picking her up.

“There’s a monster”, she whispered, with a frown.

“Where”, Spencer asked with a frown.

I sent him a look, as much as I appreciated his initiative for her to voice her opinions and anecdotes, he was too known to have an active imagination.

It had been a month after she turned two when she had cried saying that there was a monster in her room, instead of denying it he had decided to explain how it was a phenomenon that happened to most kids.

Abby, proudly carrying the last name Reid, had decided to name her monster papika. We had both freaked out when she told us papika had woke her up, just to connect the dots. She had been watching Blue’s clues and had decided to name her imaginary monster after the character paprika.

“Papika said booooooo”, she said, her mouth coming to a perfect o.

“Abby, I’ve told you Papika isn’t real.”, I said softly.

“She is so”, she said crossing her arms when Spencer sat down in the bed in the same spot.

“Papika is a she?”, I asked her, biting my lip.

“Yeah she’s a pinchess”, she said.

“A princess monster”, Spencer asked with a frown.

“Yeah”, she smiled.

“Abby, are you scared of papika?”, I asked her, trying to get her to talk to me about what she felt.

“No”, she chuckled, like the idea of a monster being scary was crazy. “But she does this”, She closed her eyes, imitating loud snoring.

“I see”, I said.

“Well maybe tomorrow we can go and get Monster spray”, Spencer said.

The kid nodded her head enthusiastically.

I narrowed my eyes at the way the girl was getting comfortable in her dad’s arms.

“Do you want daddy to tell you another night time story?”, I asked.

She shook her head. As suspected, she was trying to use papika as an excuse to spend the night here. 

“I wanna stay”, she whispered again.

“You know you need to sleep in your own bed baby”, I said.

Both her and Spencer sent me pouts.

“It isn’t fair that you both team up like that on me”, I rolled my eyes playfully.

“Please mommy”, Spencer said, his baby voice making me smile.

“Pleash mommy”, Abby said in the same tone.

“Okay, just for tonight”, I said.

How could I not when four hazel eyes looked at me with such love?

Spencer placed Abby on the other side of me, not yet ready to end the action that he had started. He brought his fingers to my belly again.

I looked over at Abby, the kid tilting her head as she saw her dad. She probably couldn’t fully comprehend that there would be two new people in the house. As much as I knew she would be an amazing big sister the idea of her not loving the idea terrified me. She was so used to having our full attention, this change will be good, I just don’t think she’ll know it right away. 

Spencer leaned down, placing a small delicate kiss on my belly.

Abby giggled not understanding.

“C’mon”, Spencer said, extending his hand to her.

She put her hand on his. He guided it to my belly. My heart beating faster at the action.

“You are going to be a big sister Ab”, I said, smiling down at her.

“Like hendy?”, she asked.

“Yeah, but instead of just one baby we’ll have two”, Spencer tried to explain. 

“Two? I’m two”, she said, putting two fingers up.

“Yeah you are”, I chuckled. 

“We mean that there are going to be two babies”, Spencer said.

She frowned again looking down to where her hand was.

“Where?”she asked, tilting her head again.

I bit my lip trying not to laugh.

“here”, Spencer said, waiting on her reaction.

“Noooo, where are babies?”, she explained the question.

“They are right here”, Spencer said, putting his hand over hers.

“Nooo, Mommy’s here”, she said.

“They are inside mommy”, he said.

The horror that planted on her face was so adorable. I sat back up, hugging her close to me.

The kid giggled, trying to squirm away.

“You little lady, need to go to sleep”, I said.

She giggled again when I started kissing her cheeks.

“Where are babies?”, she asked me.

“Right now the babies are teeny tiny, and they need time to grow”, I explained.

“Where?”, she asked again.

“They are going to grow inside mommy for a while, just like you did.”, Spencer said, with a big smile on his face.

“No I no”, she shook her head.

“You did”, he nodded his head.

The way her head fell back as she dramatically sighed made me chuckle.

“Ay Ay Ay”, she brought her hands to her head.

“Okay, I think you have been spending way too much time with Aunt Penny”, I laughed. “Now, we all need to sleep alright?”, I said.

“Do babies sleep?”, she asked.

“Yeah, and they say that they are really really tired but won’t go to bed until their sister does”, I said.

She eyed Spencer, waiting for confirmation, he nodded his head.

“Okay”, she complied.

Spencer leaned forward, placing another kiss on my tummy. Abby, who was crawling to find her spot, looked at him. With a frown she crawled down, putting my lips on the other side of my belly.

“Night night”, she said.

Spencer squeezed my hand as we saw her. Even when she couldn’t completely understand she kind of did, and that was more than enough right now. She crawled back up, quickly covering herself with the blanket.

“You put the most adorable babies inside me Dr Reid”, I whispered at Spencer once he gave me the goodnight kiss.

Abby sat up quickly in the bed, looking confusedly at us.

“Daddy put the babies?”, she asked.

My eyes opened widely in horror, as the girl sat expecting an answer. Spencer, who froze halfway of getting up, looked at me with pure horror.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm soooo excited for these babies lol!
> 
> I hope you guys have a great week


	49. Chapter 49

I looked at myself in the mirror, fixing the bowknot of my turtleneck top. I hadn’t gotten ready in fo-re-ver. For the past month my outfits had consisted of leggins and hoodies, except when I went to my once a week therapy session. I understood why, I knew how Spencer felt about me being out and about, but the world seemed to be moving on, and so I needed to do it too. Until now, Rossi had been delivering groceries to our door every Friday night, as thankful as we were, today Spencer needed to go and get it himself. The BAU was away on a case. When he said he’ll go after work with Abby I took it as an invitation to go with them, which he didn’t know I did of course. 

I checked my outfit one more time, a pink A line skirt with a white long sleeve turtleneck top. The makeup did an incredible job at hiding my zombie face. 

Sleeping at night wasn’t as easy as I wished it was, first, the babies were taking a toll on me, most nights I got a couple of hours of sleep before I woke up wanting to throw up. Then there was the nightmare, the same recurring nightmare that each night seemed to creep to me.

It was a third person view of that day, only that this time the gun was directed at me. I stood as a watcher as my lifeless body hit the ground, the blood running until the veins were completely drained. On the good nights I could continue sleeping through it, a dreamless rest of the night being my comfort. On the bad nights I woke up in tears cold sweating. On those nights Spencer’s arms around me didn’t feel the same. 

Today had been a great night, those came few and far in between. A dream of two little babies sleeping peacefully on a crib big enough to fit both of them. A girl and a boy with their dad’s eyes, and their sister’s smile. I, again stood like an spectator as Spencer rocked Abby on the chair while the three of them slept. A dream of hope I liked to think, and today I woke up to realize the dream was true, or it will be true in just six months. More or less, Twin pregnancy was complicated, and we really hadn’t talked about the c section appointment idea of it all.

When I heard Spencer called Abby I knew it was time for my grand entrance. I walked out into the hallway where he stood in front of the office door. He stopped putting his cardigan on when he turned to look at me.

“(y/n) where are you going?”, he said slightly surprised

“Well, you said we needed to go grocery shopping”, I shrugged casually.

The way his body tensed as he finished putting his cardigan on made my stomach knot.

“I said me and Abby were going. I don’t think you should be going out, maybe you can stay and order some food in?”, he said, in a soft low voice.

And I hated it, this was something I was yet to voice to anyone. I hated the way he looked at me. I imagined this is the way he talked to the countless victims he had encountered in his life. I wasn’t one of them, no I was his wife. I yearned his touch, and I missed him more than I could explain. He had been there right by my side the whole time, but as days morphed into weeks I could feel how sorry he felt for me. I hated it.

Instead of showing these emotions though I did what I knew would work. I pouted, a full pout with my bottom lip out, and my hands clasped under my chin. His tension became frustration quickly. It was a game he knew he’d lose. If he really wanted me to stay it was his opportunity to say so. 

“I’m fine I promise”, I said with a small voice.

He sighed, putting his hands on each side of my face and pressing our foreheads, his back hunched to reach me.

It wasn’t like he could actually make me stay, or that he controlled me. It was that I couldn’t go out without him being okay with it, I didn’t want to. I respected his feelings, although he didn’t fully understand mine.

He sighed one more time, opening his eyes. Hazel hues piercing my soul and rocking my world.

“Let’s go”, he nodded.

I smiled, turning around and almost waddling to the living room to get our little girl. When I came back Abby was reluctantly perched on my hip, I smiled at Spencer who had finished dressing.

“You two look so beautiful”, he smiled. Abby was wearing one of the spring outfits I bought for her beforehand. Her normally wild curls brushed carefully into two ponytails tied with bows. 

“Thank you”, I smiled, doing a small clumsy curtsy which made him chuckle.

He placed his hands on his pockets as he tilted his head.

“Daddy let’s gooo”, Abby hurried, her mouth making a perfect O as she dragged the last letter.

“Okay okay we are going”, he said, taking the diaper bag and slinging it on his shoulder. He waited for me with his hand out. 

When I made it to the door I took it, our fingers quickly intertwining.

“We are going to get dinner first, since you two look very well dressed and shouldn’t waste your outfits in a grocery run”, he smiled down at us.

I stood on my toes, still with heels it was difficult to reach him, and he met me halfway for a kiss.

“Nooo”, Abby complained, crossing her arms.

“One kiss for mommy”, he said, placing another chaste kiss on my lips. “One for Abby”, he said, puckering his lips to let the girl smack their lips together.

The smile that grew on my face was genuine, this felt normal. 

I liked normal.

If I was wondering how long was the car ride from our house, to the Italian restaurant we liked, to the grocery store, to our house again. I had my answer, it was about a thousand ‘How far I’ll go’s from the Moana soundtrack. More or less, or at least it felt like that.

“What about, we listen to the next song?”, Spencer asked, it was adorable how much he tried not to sound irritated.

I bit my lip trying to contain my smile when Abby started protesting. Still, neither of us stopped the phone to switch to the next song. ‘I see the light’ started playing.

“You know which one this is?”, I said turning to see her.

“No”, She shook her head.

I turned the volume up, letting the girl listen to the song. We both sighed relieved when there were no more protests coming from her.

I relaxed on the seat, feeling comfortable for the first time in a long time. Until something broke me from my trance. I looked over at Spencer, mouthing the words to the songs.

He had told me how his eidetic memory sometimes encapsulated the song lyrics when he was watching with Abby.

We were at a stop light when he turned to see me, not really surprised I was already looking his way.

“If she's here it's crystal clear, I'm where I'm meant to go”, he sang, a little louder this last line.

Love definitely made you deaf because the man couldn’t sing, yet my whole body shook before I joined him.

“And at last I see the light”

He put his hand out for me to take. I accepted it, my heart racing as he brought it to his lips, placing a delicate kiss on the back of it. 

I thought in that exact moment how it was impossible that this man could do this to me. Made me feel so free and light. We were married, yet I felt like a teenager in love everytime I saw into his eyes.

“Moana mommy”, Abby requested when the music stopped. 

We both sucked our lips in, preparing ourselves for the rest of the car ride.

“You two better not be making a mess”, I said, stocking the pantry.

“No mommy”, Abby said.

I walked out, supervising that the sugar had ended on the container and not the counter.

“You know we wouldn’t need to buy sugar every other week if someone stopped putting half the jar on their coffee”, I said casually, making sure the bags were empty before folding them.

“I thought by now you knew I like sweet things”, He said, walking next to me with Abby in his arms. “Like my two favorite girls”

I snuggled when his arm came around my shoulders. 

“Ready for bed?”, I asked, looking at the little girl.

“I’m not tired mommy”, she shook her head. The words contradicted by a big yawn.

“Oh sure you are not, why don’t we take a bath?”, I asked.

Spencer smirked when she shook her head again, another big yawn coming out of her.

“I’m not tired”, she complained again.

“I know, that’s why I’m saying you should take a bath, and then we can play”, I said.

Spencer narrowed his eyes, not sure about my plan. Me on the other hand, knew exactly what was going to happen.

Not even thirty minutes later we were placing a sleeping girl on her bed.

He looked over at me a little impressed.

“You are forgetting I’m her mommy and I know everything”, I said. 

“Let me never forget that”, he said, tucking Abby in and leaning towards me to kiss my lips.

I knew that as soon as the warm water hit her skin and I started playing the soft classical music she would soon forget of the promise of playtime. And that as soon as her daddy grabbed the book of the night she would cave in to her tiredness.

“Let’s go”, I said, pulling him out of the room and into our own.

“You know I love you”, he said, his lips over mine.

“I love you too”, I said.

When he tried to pull away to go get ready for bed I pulled him back in. My lips all over his. I felt the groan building in his throat.

“(y/n)... I don’t think”, He started.

I forcefully closed my eyes. My heart was hurting but also dedicated to making this happen. Ever since it happened we had not been together, and it hurt. Because in the past I knew there were reasons, like right after the pregnancy, or before our wedding. Right now I was unable to tell the reason. 

He was scared, I was scared, but I feared he saw me differently now. I tried to remind myself it was normal, especially with the pregnancy. I wanted to take advantage of the days before I felt self conscious of my body. He would tell me how beautiful I was anyway, but the pregnancy hormones would just make me extra anxious. My fears went deeper though, how much of a victim did he see in me? Would he ever touch me like he did before?

“Please”, I found myself pleading again.

“I don’t want to hurt you”, he said.

“You would never hurt me Spencer”, I said, his hands now burrowing on my hair.

“What if you are not ready?”, he asked.

The question hit me harder than what I let on. I was ready. Mainly because there were days in which I still felt the tingling sensation on my skin of that one day. I needed that feeling gone, I needed that feeling in my skin to be replaced with the feeling of him.

I carefully took one of his hands, guiding it in a slow manner down my body. He let me do it, letting me lift my skirt with both of our hands and placing it on my hip. I let it go, it was his turn.

It was a chess match.

His hand moved to my butt.

I unbuttoned his shirt.

He took my shirt off.

I unbuckled his belt.

It was a chess match in which neither of us could lose, we knew each other’s moves by memory. 

The tension growing as clothes were lost on the floor, like fallen pawns. 

He lifted me off the floor, my legs hooking around him as he walked us to the bed. Our mouths only receive the little breaks they could get in between moves.

He guided my face to his with his fingers under my chin.

“If you want to stop you just need to tell me. We don’t need to do this if you are not ready.”

But we did, I did the final move, My hips bucking up to him.

Victory was claimed in the form of moans coming out of both of our mouths when he finally buried himself in me.

My whole body arched to receive him.

“You feel so good”, he said in between attacks to my neck.

I bit into his shoulders as he moved in a deliriously slow manner.

He moved my head again, looking at me in the eyes.

“I love you”

My whole body shook at his words. My eyes threatened to fill with tears at his adoration.

“I love you”, I said, uniting our lips.

If life was a series of games then as long as he was by my side I could win them all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay I feel like this was a little different, but I hope you guys like it.


	50. Chapter 50

I hated Spencer Reid.

Only that of course I didn’t, but I did.

Right now in my mind he was to blame for the fact that two little fetuses were turning my whole body into a mess. 

I had gone to sleep on an empty stomach due to a migraine, and woken up dry heaving because there wasn’t anything to expel. Then I had completely lost my sense of smell and taste. When it came back a little after breakfast it was only for me to puke again. No, pregnancy wasn’t easy, twin pregnancy was worse. And Spencer Reid was to blame. 

I wallowed in the fetal position in the bed when he entered the room. Shooting him the deadliest stare I could muster from my position.

“I made you tea”, he said softly, walking around and placing a tray on the nightstand. 

My eyes didn’t leave him, was it possible to make someone combust just by looking? Well I was trying.

He crooked an eyebrow waiting for me to sit.

“Come on you need to get something in your system”, He said, his voice soft.

I sat down slowly. Not because he told me to, but because I wanted. The shirt staying tucked under my boobies exposing my bellly.

When he handed me the drink his hands found its way to it, rubbing the center with his thumb.

The belly was different this time too, surprisingly not bad different. With Abby I had a broad belly, she sprawled across my whole body making me look wider. The twins were a lot more perky, even at four months I could tell. Which was surprising considering there were two of them there and they needed more space. I was showing a lot more than what I did with Abby, but it was still an early pregnancy belly.

I sipped slowly from the tea, untensing a little when the drink wasn’t rejected immediately. These two were a lot more picky than Abby had been. 

I watched as Spencer took the hand away, fishing for something on the tray and bringing it to me. I ducked his hand.

“I’m trying to see if you got a fever”, he said, showing me the termometer. 

I narrowed my eyes, this time staying still to let him do it. 

He nodded when he got the reading, putting the device away from my forehead.

“You don’t have a fever, how are you feeling?”, he asked.

“I feel like hell”, I said bitterly.

His fault, definitely his fault.

He somehow had managed to fertilize two eggs. Somehow he had done something whether it be magic or science but he did something to get two babies inside me, and right now babies and mommy were not happy. He knew my cycle like the back of his hand, I’m sure he knew exactly how to do it, that sneaky bastard.

“Do you want me to bring you breakfast so you can try getting it down?” he asked, tilting his head.

His soft hazel eyes were not going to distract me from the fact that I was mad. Not only mad, but the smell of eggs hit me like a truck. A grimace planting on my face.

“I want to stop feeling like hell”, I replied.

I could see him physically fighting the urge to smile. He actually thought this was amusing. 

My lower back hurt like I had been lifting a metric ton of bricks but he thought this was amusing. 

“I can cut some fruit if you want, we can try getting that down and then you can take your vitamins”, his hand rubbed my arm.

I thought about it, fruits didn’t sound bad. Most importantly I was not running to the bathroom at the pure mention of them.

“With granola?”, I asked after a second.

“Yes with granola”, he scoffed, his hand coming to rest on my cheek.

“Yogurt?”, I asked after a second of deliberation.

“You want yogurt?”, he asked.

I nodded my head.

“Then with Yogurt too”.

“Okay then”, I said, shrugging and sitting back on the head board.

He sucked his lips in as he shook his head, walking out after he patted my leg.

I closed my eyes, taking another sip of the warm drink. The liquid traveling to my stomach and soothing it.

I rubbed my belly, my hand following the shape of it. 

Don’t get me wrong, I already loved these two more than anything. My heart had been divided in four the first time I heard their heartbeats. A part for each of them, one for their sister and one for their dad.

Who walked in with a bowl in hand. Ugh yes my granola, the one I had made countless times while I was pregnant with Abby. The one with the honey and chocolate syrup and yogurt and fruits. Nothing short of a mess.

I accepted eagerly when he put the bowl down in front of me. He tilted his head.

“Thank you”, I muttered, already behind a spoonful.

“You’re welcome, do you think you can hold that down?”, he asked.

I nodded my head, letting some blueberries pop in my mouth.

“Ok, I’m going to go check on Abby, here are your vitamins”, he said, putting the two pills on the nightstand.

“Mhhhm”, I hummed, nodding my head.

He observed me for a second before bending down and placing a kiss on my forehead. 

I responded with a small smile before he walked out. Okay maybe I didn’t hate him, maybe I even like him a little. He was fine as long as he kept these coming. 

I washed the vitamins down with some tea before continuing working on the bowl. Some soap opera playing on the tv. I absently tried to follow the story.

I was done with the bowl when I heard a soft knocking.

“Come in”, I said, my body feeling not so horrible now.

“Hey”, Spencer smiled, he had Abby on one arm and a bowl on his other hand. “Abby here wanted to know how mommy was doing.”, he smiled, bringing the girl closer. 

Abby looked at me with curiosity.

“Do you want to show mommy what you did?”, Spencer said. 

Abby leaned down, handing me a piece of paper.

“Oh what is this!”, I smiled, looking at the two figures drawn.

“The babies mommy”, she said like it was completely obvious. 

“This is amazing!”, I smiled, extending my arms to grab her. 

Spencer helped me put her on the bed next to me.

“I made you another one”, he said, handing me the bowl.

My stomach growled as if I hadn’t eaten one five seconds ago.

“Thank you”, I said, this time blushing softly.

Okay I loved Spencer Reid.

“Feeling better already?”, he asked, sitting by my legs.

“A little bit, the food and the drawing really helped.”, I looked down at Abby who was eyeing the contents of the bowl.

I took the spoon and fed her some, she gratefully accepted.

“Daddy makes the best granolas right?”, I asked, eyeing Spencer who just looked at us with a smile.

Abby nodded her head, opening her mouth to ask for more.

“What do you say?”, he prompted.

“Please mommy”, she responded.

“Of course baby here we go”, I said, feeding her some of the contents.

I smiled, alternating spoons between me and her. 

“Here”, I said, extending an olive branch to Spencer in the form of a spoonful of granola.

He leaned forward, accepting it and chewing the fruit.

I couldn’t help but chuckle at the way Abby looked at my belly, a little confused by the exposition.

I put my palm up for her to put her little hand on, which she did. I moved the hand to the side of my belly, where I could slightly tell one of the twins was laying. She looked up at me.

“Are you ready to be a big sister?”, I asked, scraping the bottom of the bowl.

She looked up at Spencer, who had stars in his eyes from watching the scene. Then up at me again.

“Mommy and me and Daddy and sister play?”, she asked, tilting her head. She was letting us know her terms and conditions right off the vat.

“Of course we will all play”, I smiled.

“Now?”, she asked again.

“Right now?” Spencer asked, a little confused. We thought we had gotten her to understand that the babies needed time cooking first. “I don’t think mommy wants to play right now pumpkin, she is not feeling well”, he said in his soft voice.

Abby’s pout was enough to make me pout.

“Tell you what, you bring your toys here and we can play in bed today”, I offered, bringing my hand to her hair.

She considered it for a second before smiling. Not wasting time and sliding off the bed and to the living room.

“Are you sure you are feeling like playing right now?”, He asked, a little concerned.

I thought about it for a second. I still didn’t feel my best, but I wanted to spend my day with Abby anyway. 

“Yeah, I’m feeling better”, I nodded my head.

He sat there looking at me, I could see his eyebrows barely furrowed.

“I’m sorry for being a bitch to you all morning”, I said. 

He had gotten my wrath ever since I woke up, and he had tried to make things better all since.

Now his eyebrows really furrowed. “You were not a bitch”, he said, getting closer to me.

“I kinda was”, I said in an apologetical whisper.

“No you weren’t, you have a lot going on, and I’m sure these two are not making it easier”, he said rubbing my belly.

I giggled for some reason, my body feeling shivers when his hand met my skin. He looked at me a little confused.

“I think they got happy”, I said, pressing his hand on one particular spot. “Oh they definitely like to feel their dad near”, I said, looking down at my belly.

“Are they moving?”, He asked, trying to get a feel for himself.

“It’s weird because yes but no”, I tried to explain.

He nodded his head.

“I read that about twins, mothers say they experience weird movement feelings.”, he said, bringing his face down and kissing the skin.

I giggled again. 

“They definitely like their daddy’s kisses already.”, I smiled. 

“When you guys come I will shower you with kisses all day”, he whispered at my belly. “So much so that you guys will get tired of me”.

I brushed his hair with my fingers, the fluff mess combing away from his face.

“I don’t think anyone can get tired of that”, I said.

He met my eyes, raising to place a kiss on my lips. I smiled in between kisses, closing my eyes and enjoying the feeling.

“I love you Doctor Reid”, I said.

“I love you too Mrs Reid”, he smiled.

“Mommy I bought my dolls”, Abby said, walking in the room and dragging a basket full of toys.

This was not what I meant when I told her bring your toys, I was expecting her to bring a couple. My eyebrows shoot up in amusement of the little girl struggling to drag the basket.

“Pumpkin be careful”, Spencer stood up quickly, picking the basket up. “You can get hurt”, he said, then placing it next to the bed.

“No daddy I’m strong”, she said, flexing her arms with puckered lips.

“Sure you are”, he said, picking the little girl up and placing a kiss on her cheek.

“She got the brains and the brawn”, I joked, seeing as she left the bed one more to get some dolls.

She handed me two dolls, going back and handing Spencer another two. She got three herself, a female doll and a male doll.

“This is mommy”, She said, showing me the doll.

“Oh that’s me?”, I asked amusedly.

“Yep, and this daddy”, she said showing the other doll.

“They even look alike”, I replied waving my hand.

Spencer chuckled, inspecting the dolls he had in his hand.

“Oh pencer I wuv you, mwa mwa”, Abby said in a mimicky voice, waving both dolls in her hand and making them kiss. 

“Wait a minute”, I laughed. “Is that me?” 

“Yeah mommy, you always say. I wuv you pencer”, She nodded her head.

“She is right”, Spencer nodded. 

I laughed more now, not even caring for the mocking. Very much entertained by her reenactment,

“Well she is right, this is a house full of daddy’s girls”, I smiled at him.

“Four daddy’s girls”, he said proudly.

“three”, I corrected.

“Did you change your mind so quickly?”, he pouted.

“Yes, I want a little Spencer Reid Jr. Can you blame me?”, I smiled widely at the idea of a baby boy.

“No, but I really like how a certain little girl turned out”, he eyed Abby who was now very entertained.

“She did turn out great didn’t she?”, I smiled.

“You did a great job”, he nodded.

“We did”, I confirmed.

“You did, she got your kindness and your sweetness”

“But she got your brains and your adorable eyes”

I was very much satisfied by the crimson that crept on him.

“We are good at this right?”, he asked. 

I knew the question came after a rough morning in which we both realized how crazy things were about to get.

“We are the bestest”, I joked, knowing how mispronounced words got him.

He scrunched up his nose before I launched myself to kiss him. His hands landing on my hips as I knelt on the bed.

“Ewwwwwww”, Abby complained. 

I separated myself with a smile, Spencer guiding me to sit on his lap so that I was facing the little girl.

“Does Abby want kisses?”, I asked.

She frowned, shaking her head and continuing playing. I shrugged, facing Spencer and giving him another kiss on the lips. He smiled brushing his nose against mine, his hand settling on my belly.

It didn’t take long for my laziness to rub off on everyone. Abby was now laying sucking her thumb more asleep than awake. Spencer was behind me, his hands on my belly as I spooned against him.

“We’ll soon know for sure what we are having”, I smiled at the thought of the appointment not even a week from now.

“We will”, He smiled. “And I will love them no matter what”, he said.

I smiled, I would too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is some pregnancy hormones and family bonding time. The genders will be revealed on the next chapter.
> 
> I also need help with names because I have an idea but like I would like to hear some input!  
> Also! One of the two does have a family member who was a twin, who do you think it is????
> 
> I hope you guys have a great weekend.


	51. Chapter 51

I walked into the diner, the entrance bell ringing to announce my presence. The place was empty, desert with only the retro music playing. The song was foreign to my ears. I walked to the only table with someone in it.

“Please take a seat”, the man said.

I couldn’t feel if I actually sat, but I was somehow in front of him now, pressed between the table and the back of the booth.

The man leaned on the table, making me catch my breath.

“What do you want?”, I asked.

“I want to know how you are living with it”, he said, shrugging his shoulders.

“What do you mean?”, My voice trembled.

“Living knowing that you killed me”, He clarified.

“I didn’t kill you… It was your choice not mine”, I said, repeating the exact words my therapist told me.

“You did”, he shrugged his shoulders again. “You said that to me knowing how it would affect me, you didn’t pull the trigger but you killed me.”, He smiled, his smile making me feel incredibly small.

“You were going to kill me, it was me or you…”, I explained.

“How are you planning on raising three kids knowing that you are a murderer? Do you think little Abby will ever ask what happened to her mom that one time.”, He said.

“Please”, I said through tears. “I tried to make time, I didn’t think you would…”

In that moment his hand raised, bringing the gun to my face, a gun I hadn’t seen before.

“That I would pull the trigger?”He asked.

I could feel my heartbeat when I nodded.

“Pull the trigger like this?”, he said, right before the bang.

The next thing I felt was my body jolting on the bed making me sit.

“(y/n)”, Spencer said, his voice terrified and groggy as he put his arms around me.  
I was crying, sobbing on his chest before I knew it.

“I’m sorry”, I apologized between sobs, my voice still shaky from my nightmare.

“You don’t need to apologize”, he said rubbing my back. “Were you having a nightmare?”, He asked.

He already knew the answer but was most likely wanting me to talk right now.

“Yeah”, I nodded my head while I wiped my face with the sleeve of my shirt.

“Do you want to talk about it?”, his voice was very soft when he spoke. Too soft, almost like he was scared to ask the questions he had.

“No”, I said, burying my face on his chest.

“Let me get you some water, you are sweating, take your shirt off”, he instructed.

When he moved I looked at the time, three AM.

“No Spencer you need to sleep…”, I protested.

“I don’t even have to work tomorrow, do as I say… please”, he said, the last word coming as an afterthought.

I removed the long sleeve shirt I had gone to sleep in, most nights I was fine sleeping like this, today the item was drenched in sweat. I tightened my ponytail, letting out a long sigh.

The feeling of my exposed upper half with only the sports bra covering me was enough to pull me back to reality. My hands traveled to my belly in an attempt to find comfort on the two lives inside me.

“Here”, Spencer said, walking back in with a glass of iced water.

“Thank you”, I received it, gulping two thirds without hesitation.

“Do you need anything else?”, he asked, still standing next to the bed.

“Can you, can you hug me?”, I shyly mumbled. I felt weirdly exposed right now.

“Of course darling”, he said, a little baffled by the question.

In less than a minute he walked to his side of the bed, sat against the headboard and pulled me into his lap. His hand reaching for the glass and placing it on the nightstand. My arms quickly found the way around his neck, his were around my waist.

I knew part of him wanted to ask me if I wanted to tell him, but I really really didn’t.

“Your unit chief probably hates me”, I whisper after a second. “I keep you from work so much”, I tried to make it sound as a joke.

“Blake is great, she understands. She does not hate you either, actually she thinks you are very sweet, you won her over that time you sent her cookies”, he said, his hand rubbing my arm “It doesn’t surprise me you are easy to love”, he placed a kiss on the side of my head.

I didn’t respond to that, deciding to believe him and instead just enjoying the warmth of his body against my naked skin.

“Spencer”, I said after a second.

“Hmm?”, he hummed, more asleep than awake at that point.

“I love you so much”, I said.

“I love you too my sweet girl”, he responded.

We stayed there for a minute, until my heartbeat lowered again. I tried to stop thinking about it, my brain pulling me back to my dream at every opportunity.

“Spencer”, I said again. This time I knew he was listening because his eyes met mine.

The question stuck on my throat, because the moment I opened my mouth I felt a very familiar zing in my belly. My eyes shot open as I looked down. I had felt internal movement with the twins before, but right now one of them was kicking.

“One of the babies kicked”, I said.

His reaction was immediate, his hands finding my tummy before another zing came, this one landing directly on his palm.

The tears flooded my eyes, in a way it felt like these life inside me had stopped me from asking a very hard question. They were here, right there. Growing and moving.

“Oh”, Spencer smiled brightly when another came. “Hi little one…”, he lowered himself whispering. “Hi, is me dad…” Another one. “Yeah, Hi, we love you so so much. The two of you”, he said. His other hand came to the other side where it seemed like the other twin was quite. 

Not for long, as soon as the hand landed there was a zing on the opposite direction. I chuckled now in a sob. It felt so much weirder.

Spencer chuckled two, the tears falling through his face.

“Both of you decided to say hi today uh? Is it because you know that we’ll be looking at you today?”, he asked. 

When he looked up at me both of us had nothing but happiness in our faces. 

“Thank you”, he said, before I opened my mouth he continued. “For giving me the best family I could have hoped for.”

“Well it’s all you”, I smiled wiping my tears.

“No, it’s you, Abby and the twins are all you, you are the best mom and the best wife, and I love you. Not only because of that but because you are the sweetest, kindest, most amazing person on earth”

Before he could finish I was crying already, his thumb wiping the tears as he hugged me again. I don’t know how long we stayed like that but it was definitely enough for me to fall asleep in his arms.

“Mom is doing great”, Dr Arya said, as we both walked from the exam room to the ultrasound room, where Abby and Spencer sat on a chair.

Spencer smiled up at me when I came around to sit on the bed.

“Now let’s see how the little ones are doing, you said you felt them kick today?”, She asked, starting the equipment.

“Both of them”, I smiled putting my hand on my belly.

“They kick mommy”, Abby nodded her head.

“You felt it too?”, Dr Arya asked in her very kind voice.

Abby nodded her head with pursed lips.

“They wanted to say hi to their sister”, Spencer said in her ear. The girl smiled up at him.

“Well now we are going to see them and hopefully get to see what they are. Do you have any preferences?”

“Girls”

“As long as they are healthy”

Spencer and I said in unison. We shared a comical look and then chuckled.

“Well I would like a boy”, I said after a second.

“With fraternal twins the odds are in your favor”, Dr Arya said. “Let’s get started so we can finally see”, she signaled at the bed.

“Oh wait a second.”, I said, fumbling on my purse, getting a black strip of fabric out. “Come here”, I called Spencer.

“But-”

“You said you wanted to find out at the same time as me, so come here”, I said.

He got out of his chair, crouching a little so I could put the blindfold on.

“How many fingers I have here”, I said, putting three fingers up.

“I can’t see anything…”

“How many fingers I have here”, Abby said, in the same tone, putting all of her five fingers up in his face.

“Two?” He asked.

The girl looked down at her hand, realizing she herself didn’t know, she showed me her hand.

“No, it 's five. You can sit”, I said, biting my lip amusedly as he reached his hand to feel the chair he had been previously sitting on.

“Ok we are ready”, I said, pulling my shirt up and laying down.

I shivered just a little when the gel hit my skin, the doctor quickly moving the wand around to get a picture.

The room was quickly filled by the sound of two separate heartbeats that were not on tune. I smiled.

“Heartbeats are good, and the positions are promising, let me see..”, She said, moving the wand to the sides.

“Do you want to know one by one?”, she asked.

Spencer’s hand clumsily tried to reach mine. I grabbed it.

“Yeah”, I said confidently.

“Here we have… a girl.”, she smiled. “Over here we have… a little boy”

My smile grew as my free hand traveled to my mouth. A girl and a boy, a little girl and a little boy.

“Looks like you will be having a little couple”, she said “Congratulations”

Spencer, who had gone still for a second, removed his blindfold hurriedly. Launching at me all kisses and smiles.

“We are having a little girl and a little boy.”, He cried.

“We are having a girl and a boy”, I said.

My lips met his when he came down again.

“Did you hear that Abby?”, I asked the girl who was kneeling on the bed next to me. “You are having a little brother and a little sister?”

“A sister?”, she smiled.

“Yeah”, I said biting my lip as I nodded. The little girl seemed in awe by the news, pulling on my heart strings.

“And we are going to play dolls right mommy?”, The girl asked, I looked at her through the mirror.

“Of course you are a baby”, I smiled.

“You know when they are born babies are very tiny Abby, and they can’t play, so it will be a while before you can play with your siblings.”, Spencer tried to explain.

“A week?”, she asked in a hopeful tone.

I chuckled, “A little longer than that, but in the meantime we can still play with you all you want”, I said.

She took a second to consider that, “Okay”, she finally said.

Spencer had been oddly quiet the whole way back. 

“What’s on your mind Dr Reid?”, I asked him, Squeezing his hand that laid on the console.

“There’s going to be three girls and two boys at home very soon”, he said, his hand finding my belly and resting there.

“A little Spencer Reid Junior”, I smiled.

His nose scrunched up. “A little (y/n)?”

“No”, I shook my head.

“I think it might be cute”, he said.

“Abby, what do you think the babies should be named?”, I asked the girl.

“Pancakes”, she replied with a nod.

“There you have it, Pancakes and waffles”, I looked at Spencer whose eyes were wide

“No mommy, pretzel”, she said.

“Pancake Reid and Pretzel Reid, that has a nice ring to it.”, I joked.

“I’m getting hungry”, Spencer muttered under his breath as he made a turn.

I looked back at Abby smiling at the girl who seemed very happy to be naming her siblings after foods she liked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There you have it folks, a little pancake reid and a little pretzel reid.


	52. Chapter 52

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! here's more fluff because we know by now this is the only thing I write lol.
> 
> Next chapter will include some angst so there's that!  
> Thank you for reading, I love to read ya'll's comments and to see you guys like the story!

“Abigail Reid you come here right this moment”, I said with my stern mom voice.

I saw as the kid peeked from the corner, trying to assert the situation before she marched into the kitchen.

She rocked on her feet, all innocent smiles and big hazel eyes.

“Did you finish all your vegetables before you went to play?”, I asked, I had left her to finish her food as I started folding laundry.

She thought about it for a minute, her eyebrows slightly furrowed just like her dad’s did when he was in deep thought.

“Yes”, she finally decided on an answer accompanied by a dramatic nod.

“Let’s try that again”, I said, slowly walking towards her and kneeling on the floor to meet her eyes. “Did you finish all your vegetables before you went to play?”, I asked again, trying this time to soften my voice.

She pursed her lips, looking to the side as if she couldn’t really remember.

“Well?”

“My tummy hurts”, she nodded.

“Does your tummy really hurt?”, I asked her. I could see I had got her before she even replied.

“M’not hungry”, she complained.

“That’s okay, and you can tell me that, and we can work with that. Instead you gave your vegetables to goofy, and that is not okay”, I said, trying to speak as clearly as I could for her to know I wasn’t mad because he hadn’t eaten, instead because she had walked to the corner and dumped the carrots and broccoli in the dog’s food dish.

“Goofy hungry”, she explained with a pout.

“He has his own food, he doesn’t need the vegetables, you do”, I said.

Her eyes watered as she crossed her arms now. 

“Abby…”, I started, but before I could say anything she was crying.

“I’m sowwy”, she said between tears.

Possibly crocodile tears, but it was a sore sight nevertheless.

“Come here ab”, I said, hugging the girl and using the top of my shirt to wipe her face delicately. “Don’t cry baby” I soothed.

“mommy’s mad”, she cried some more, and oh did she move my heart.

“I am not mad okay? I just want you to know that you shouldn’t do what you did, next time you are not hungry anymore you need to tell me”, I said.

When her tears kept coming I sat on the floor, putting her on my lap as I rocked her.

“Mommy and daddy mad”, she continued.

I froze in complete confusion.

“Mommy is not mad at daddy either, why do you say that baby?”, I asked, part of me trying to replay everything Spencer and I had said to each other this morning, in case she heard anything.

“Mommy didn’t give a goodbye kiss to daddy”, she said, this time her tears stopping as she buried her head on my chest.

Oh.

Spencer and I had been thinking of baby names all morning, and when greek names came out he felt the need to talk to me about mythology for a little too long. When a very sleepy Abby walked in the living room we had both realized he was late for work, so he left in a hurry. She was right, I hadn’t given him a goodbye kiss, I just didn’t know how she associated that with us being mad.

Right now Abby’s linguistic world consisted of all the words slightly mispronounced. Most of the vocabulary was repeating what she heard. Like that time she told me she wanted to go to Pluto, only that she did not say Pluto and said something that sounded a little like it making me wonder what she meant for six hours. It wasn’t till Spencer realized she had been listening to the documentary he was watching that we both understood her confusion. That night he made sure to read her a book about space, the little girl completely enveloped in whatever idea had gotten in her head about space.

She had shown before just how perceptive she could be, but this time I was completely shocked. Clearly signs of affection were seen as a very positive happy thing at home, but I didn’t imagine she would associate Spencer not saying goodbye with his usual kiss as a sign of hostility . Part of me knew we had to make her understand that sometimes people, especially adults, forget to show love in the physical ways, but that doesn’t mean that we don’t love each other. Another part of me thought it was absolutely adorable for her to be so used to us displaying our affection.

“We forgot to give each other a goodbye kiss uh?”, I asked, rubbing the back of my very emotional receptive little girl. “Did he forget to give you a goodbye kiss?”, I asked, hoping that he didn’t.

She nodded her head.

“Oh daddy is in trouble when he gets back, we are giving him so many kisses”, I said.

She looked up at me, her little chubby face now puffy and her nose red.

“I am not mad at daddy, and I am not mad at you”, I said. “Next time we can come to an agreement about your veggies, but I don’t want you to lie to me okay?”, I said.

“Ageement?”, she asked.

“Yeah, is when two people talk to get what they want, but in a way in which they are both happy. Next time you can tell me I don’t want to eat all my veggies and I can say okay if you finish them you can have ice cream for dessert”, I said.

Her eyes lit up.

“can we mommy?”, she pleaded.

“I’m going to give you veggies for dinner, and if you eat all of them we will have ice cream okay?”, I said.

She nodded enthusiastically.

“I promise”, she said.

“Okay, but for now let me see that beautiful smile of yours”, I said, coming down and placing kisses all over her face. A toothy laugh escaping her in no time. “I need you to know that if daddy and I ever forget to give you kisses it doesn’t mean we are mad. Sometimes we can be distracted and forget, but we love you very very much. Today tomorrow and forever”, I kissed the top of her head.

She nodded, this time smiling up at me.

By the afternoon was over Abby and I sat on the couch. The little girl wedged between me and the armrest of the couch. She absently played with my fingers as we both watched a movie.

“I’m back”, We both heard Spencer announce from the front door. “Sorry I’m late, I told Blake I would work the extra time I lost this morning.”

We shared a conspiratory look between us before he walked in the living room, putting his satchel on a chair before he walked towards us with a smile.

“How are my two favorite girls?”, he asked.

When we both just stared at him his eyebrows furrowed.

“Everything okay?”, he asked a little concerned.

“Did you forget anything today Dr Reid?”, I asked him, knowing that by the use of his titled he’ll know I wasn’t actually serious.

The wrinkles on his forehead deepened as he looked at us. “No”, he shook his head. I could almost see the gears turning and it was very funny.

“You did, both me and Abby here were missing our goodbye kisses this morning”, I explained. “Right Abby?”, I looked down at the girl who had a full on frown with pout.

“Yes”, She nodded.

When Spencer registered the words his expression fell, immediately getting on the couch right next to me. He pulled Abby to his lap and swung my legs over his.

“I’m so so sorry”, He said, now he had a pout.

“Well, we need you to compensate”, I said.

“Of course”, he said, now with a soften expression he kissed Abby’s cheek. The girl looking at him for a second. 

“Daddy!”, she said excitedly now, standing up and hugging him by the neck.

“Hi my little girl”, he said in some sense of relief. His mouth kissing her cheek a couple of times.

When she returned the kisses he turned to see me.

“I think I also owe Mrs Reid something?”

“Oh you do, come here genius”, I said, meeting his lips halfway for a delicate kiss.

“I must have been in a rush this morning.”, he explained, this time with real concern in his voice.

“Did you get in trouble?”, I asked, moving my body to have better access to him.

“No, I was only like ten minutes late, but everyone was in the office by the time I made it”, he said.

I started undoing his tie that was tucked under a gray sweater vest.

“So, how was your day Abby?”, he turned to the girl.

“Mommy and I play”, she said “Mommy said I have ice cream”.

“Are we having ice cream tonight?”, he asked.

The girl nodded her head. 

“Me and daddy play now?”, she said, hugging him again now that I had taken the tie off.

“Of course we are going to play now sweetheart”, he smiled the girl bounced on her feet before getting off the couch.

“Dinner should be ready soon, fifteen minutes of playtime”, I said before she walked away.

I turned to Spencer now, handing him the tie. 

“hello”, I smiled.

“Hello”, he smiled back, placing a soft kiss on my lips thus creating goosebumps in my arms.

“So, who realized I had forgotten the goodbye kisses?”, he asked, rubbing my belly.

“She did, she thought we were mad at each other or something”, I said.

He furrowed his eyebrows.

“We have a very emotional little girl”, I smiled.

“We really do, I’m really sorry for forgetting to give you guys kisses”, he said, genuinely sorry.

“It’s okay Spencer, sometimes we forget. Even when we have an IQ of 187”, I joked.

“Still, let me pay my debt”, This time his face came to mine slowly, our lips parting as they met.

I felt a strong kick on one side, right where he had his hand.

“Ouch”, I said through a grimace.

“I see someone else is mad that I forgot the morning kisses”, he joked.

“Yeah but what did I do?”, I chuckled, rubbing my belly.

“Hello guys”, he whispered, pressing his lips at the top of my belly.

I brushed his hair back as he placed a kiss on the fabric of my shirt.

“Daddy! hurry”, Abby said, running into the living room and beckoning the man with both hands before running back to her room.

“You better hurry Dr Reid, I heard Ms Reid doesn’t like to be kept waiting”, I said with a big smile.

“No she doesn’t”, he chuckled. “I am going to pay you back as soon as all the kids let us”, he said.

I almost shivered at his words, like the stupid teenager in love I became everytime he was near.

“Can’t wait”, I smiled up as he started gathering his things. 

“We are going to Rossi’s this weekend right?”, he asked, looking at me.

“Homemade authentic pizza? Wouldn't miss it for anything”, I smiled.

“I love you Mrs Reid”, his smile this time was soft and genuine.

“I love you Doctor”, I replied.


	53. Chapter 53

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I say angst today? No I meant reader wearing the strawberry dress and shameless smut. This is technically porn with no plot okay? Okay!

There was something very primal about your partner being extra possessive during pregnancy. How did Spencer manage to make that sexy I would never know. Maybe it was just the hormones rushing through me 24/7.

My fingers sprinkled some more cheese on top of the raw pizza pie in front of us on the counter. The rest of the team have also split in couples to prepare their own food. Everyone stood around, except for me who was granted privilege from the fact that I had two extra tiny people inside of me. It was adorable how Spencer didn’t complain about my choice of toppings as I reached for the chili flakes. He stood to my side with his body behind me, just watching me do whatever I wanted with our food.

“The garlic is going to caramelize on the oven so well! Good choice”, Rossi said, praising the choices of Penelope and Derek as he made his way around the groups, always supervising no one was butchering the italian art of pizza making.

He stopped when he got next to us, his eyes growing.

“Don’t you dare”, I stopped him before he said anything. I heard as Spencer chuckled behind me.

Rossi quickly raised his hands in defense. “I wasn’t going to criticize anything!”, He smiled.

I chuckled at the way his eyes still traveled at the pineapple mushroom pepperoni and jalapenos pizza. Being six months pregnant with twins does that for your appetite.

“If the piccoli wants that”, he said, accepting the combination in front of us. “Are you feeling fine, is the stool comfortable? I can get you a cushion if you need one”, he said, eyeing my belly.

I smiled sweetly at him, “I’m okay, they are too distracted by the food to be giving me much trouble”, I said. I moved on my stool to grant access to his hand.

He asked permission before placing it on top of the belly. The Strawberry dress I was wearing had strings right on top, which shaped the pregnant belly very well, I felt cute for the first time in a while. I felt as one of the twins immediately reacted to the rubbing.

“Oh they like you”, I giggled.

“They know I’m the one who is going to take them to Italy as soon as they are old enough to walk!”, he said happily.

I turned to see Spencer, who was less thrilled at the idea of having his kids running around a foreign country.

“You have no say in this kid”, Rossi warned him before smiling one more time and walking away.

“That is definitely not happening”, Spencer looked down at me with his eyebrows furrowed.

“Owe, you are telling me you don’t want your kids to run around italy unsupervised?”, I joked.

He took a second to make sure I was kidding, granting me a moment to stretch up and place a kiss on his cheek. He ran his thumb through my cheek with a smile before looking up.

Rossi was, without a doubt, the best grandad in the world. His whole house had slowly become a kid’s place. As the group was around the marble kitchen island, the kids were on a short table next to us, they had all the things we had, only that it was a lot more kids friendly. I scrunched my nose up as I noticed how Abby had managed to get marinara sauce everywhere around her.

“Abby”, Spencer called, the kid looked up, trying to find her dad around the people. “Put the sauce ON the pizza”, he said in a tone that was less authoritative and more of an idea.

The kid looked down, dumping the contents of the sauce just enough on the edge of the pie to get it twenty percent of it, while the rest spilled on the table.

Emily laughed out loud.

“Let me help her”, she said, padding my shoulder as she walked around to help the little girl. I muttered a thank you as I saw her help the girl clean the pool of tomato.

After everyone had eaten, Morgan and Rossi had assured me they would clean alone and almost kicked me out of the kitchen. Everyone made their way to the backyard, the night was nice enough. I sat on one of the benches that were placed around, smiling at the image before me.

Spencer had the kids gathered around him as Abby sat on his legs, he was giving the kids and penelope a magic show that made them giggle every couple of minutes.

My heart warmed, thinking how soon there would be two more of those little people who were going to enjoy his presence.

“How are you?”, Aaron asked with a smile, sitting next to me and handing me a glass of fresh lemonade.

“I’m good, how have you been?”, I asked him, I hadn’t seen the team in a while, definitely a lot longer than what I had gotten used to seeing them.

“Good, We’ve been bouncing around the country”, he sighed.

I sent him a friendly smile.

“How is Jack doing?”, I asked him as he eyed the kid as Spencer asked him to pull a card out of the deck.

“He’s fine, We are planning on taking a vacation, just me and him for a while.”, he said nostalgically.

“That sounds really nice”, I smiled.

“Yeah, so, ready to greet the two babies yet?”

“Uff”, I let out a long sigh which made him giggle. “We have the nursery ready, and bought a crib especially made for twins, but we are definitely not ready just yet”, I said. 

“I can’t imagine the jump from one to three is going to be easy, but I’m sure you’ll make it just fine”, he said reassuringly.

“Oh, in my case is the jump from two to four”, I joked, as we both saw how Spencer had somehow ended on the grass with four kids on top of him.

We both laughed now, watching as Penelope helped him get back on his feet while the kids scattered. The sight of Spencer running behind Abby and picking her up in one swift motion warmed my heart.

I was making it out of the shower. As soon as we got home I got Abby in the bath and Spencer had taken his own shower. After that he had gotten the girl in bed and I had hoped for my own alone time. I needed the warm water, even when the dress I had been wearing was flowy, pregnancy seemed to be nine months of a heatwave. 

“Hey”, Spencer said walking in the bedroom.

I jumped just a little with drying my hair with the towel. 

“Oh, I thought you were going to take longer”, I said, explaining my reaction.

“She was exhausted, fell asleep right away”, he smiled, coming to give me a hug.

I hummed happily on his arms. 

“She’s not the only one who is tired”, I mumbled.

“I was hoping you and I can have some us time”, He said in a low voice, his hand opening the bathrobe and planting his hands on either side of my belly. “How are they behaving?”, he asked.

I took half a step back, letting him take a glimpse of it. “They are sleeping I guess”, I said, to the lack of movement inside me.

When his hands started carefully undoing the fabric belt of the robe I furrowed my eyebrows.

“I want to see you”, He said, helping me take the garment off.

I felt oddly exposed, only wearing my panties as he guided me to the bed. We both climbed in, laying on our sides as we faced each other. 

“You look beautiful”, he said, brushing off a strand of hair that had fallen on my face.

I blushed just enough to make him scoff.

“So about baby names..”, I said, starting the topic we had talked about non stop.

“Don’t tell me Morgan convinced you to name him after him”, he joked.

“Well, I think Penelope’s idea was great. Derek and Penelope in honor of the best pair of people”, I smiled. He looked at me, making sure I was joking before shaking his head with a chuckle.

“We can discuss that for middle names”, he whispered after a second.

“I still like Spencer”, I almost begged with a pout. “C’mon, little Spencer Reid? A boy with your eyes and your smile, a mini you”, I smiled brightly.

He shook his head, His hand that was previously placed on my cheek made its way down to my belly. Before being stopped by the way I sucked in air through my teeth.

He looked concerned for a second. “Everything okay?”, he prompted himself up on his arm.

“Yeah”, I nodded, placing his hand on the spot that it was previously on, his thumb rubbing the skin.

“Does anything hurt?”, he continued.

“It’s nothing”, I reassured him, but it was clear he wasn’t ready to drop the subject.

“Your hand accidentally touched my boob, and my body is getting ready to receive two babies”, I tried to explain.

Granted it was a weird way of phrasing that his hand had made contact with my nipple and it had turned me on slightly. I knew exactly how to get Spencer going, and he knew how to do the same to me. Yet nothing could have prepared me for the way he slowly came down to my breasts, the ones he had barely even noticed were uncovered a minute before. Without a moment of hesitation he latched unto the nub, using his tongue to rub circles on it and sucking with his lips. 

I groaned loudly, surprised by the sudden intrusion. It only encouraged him to continue, using his teeth to softly pull on it. 

I bit my bottom lip as my hand traveled to the back of his head. My fingers digging slightly on his scalp as he continued. When his eyes met mine I couldn’t help but whimper slightly at the intimacy. His hand traveled up, tugging on my chin to free my lip from my teeth, his thumb rubbing the redness.

I was quick with my hand, but he was quicker. Before I could get to the building bulge on his pajama bottoms he grabbed my wrist. A lot harder than he had intended based on the way he loosened his grip quickly. He came back up, meeting my face and kissing me stealing the little breath that remained on my lungs.

“Another day I would let you enchant me with those pretty eyes of yours”, He had a devilishly smile on his lips as he looked down at mine. “Tonight I have another idea for you darling”, he said.

Before I could argue, not that I would argue his logic, he yanked my hand forward, making me roll on my back so I was facing the other way. My breath caught, almost making me choke from the realization of what was about to happen. Spencer’s hand came quickly around me, kneading the other breast.

“You like doing that right? Looking all cute? Walking around knowing you would get whatever you want just by batting your eyes?”, His breath was hot and heavy against my neck. I felt his hands pulling my underwear down, throwing them away somewhere on the floor. I didn’t feel him release himself, just his member poking my butt as he started kissing my neck. “Answer me”

When he said that I had almost forgotten the question, the excitement of the situation clouding my brain.

“Yes”, I squeaked, when he started moving my leg up.

“Yeah I thought so”, After he had finished his words he started entering me, slowly and carefully.

My whole body was aching to meet him, so hungry for him it was laughable.

“You know why I don’t mind that?”, he asked.

I wanted to beg him to stop this questionnaire, but his words were intoxicating as he spoke them right next to my ear.

“No”, my voice came shaky from behind a moan.

“Because everyone knows you are mine”, he almost growled, just as his member hit the deepest part of me.

I bit my lip to stop the moans from coming, but once again his hand tugged on my chin.

“Be loud for me would you? As I take what is mine”, When he started moving the rhythm matched his almost angry tone, exiting almost completely before coming back to me with force.

Knowing that the nursery was now empty, having done the moving last week. For the first time in ages we could be as loud as we wanted in our bedroom. So, I gave him what he wanted, moaning loudly his name as he continued pumping.

“They see you and they know you are mine, they know what I did to you”, he said, hissing once he entered me again. “They know you belong to me, my sweet girl, mine and nobody else’s”, 

My eyes rolled to the back of my head, knowing he was completely correct.

“Touch yourself”, he ordered.

“They see you and they see my wife, my woman”, the possessive meaning of his words made him quicken his moves, the whole bed shaking under us as he moved.

I could barely move, one arm trapped under me and the other hand gripping on the sheets for dear life. Still my body wanted to follow his orders, letting him know how right his words were. My fingers came down to the place our bodies were meeting, rubbing on my clit slowly.

“Do you feel yourself? Do you see what I do to you?”, he whispered. “Do you- Fuck- do you feel how your body knows you are mine?”, I could only nod at that point. My body at the brink of overstimulation as he kept moving.

“Yes”, I whimpered once again. My walls tightened as I got dangerously close.

“What do you want?”, he asked.

“I want you”, I begged, getting my strength back for just one moment. “I want you doctor”, I continued.

That was what he wanted apparently, because he threw my hand away, quickly replacing it with his. His digits now pressing on me and rubbing. That was enough for me to start shaking, my body pressing against him as my orgasm hit me like a train.

He followed not even a minute later, filling me as I could feel the twitching inside me. He slowed down, before stopping completely. Hugging me for a while, his lips kissing the back of my head.

I looked at the time, it was close to one am and I was exhausted. Not only from the activities that had just happened. Spencer granted me mercy by being the one who got up. Walking to the bathroom. I closed my eyes, hearing his footsteps and the water running.

I was about to drift off when he finally came back. He snuck his arms under me and placed me in the bed, my head on the pillows again. 

“Hmmm thanks”, I hummed satisfied, now that I was face up he separated my legs just slightly. I felt him run a wet towel between my legs, cleaning all evidence. “Have I told you you are the best?”, I told him as he put my underwear on. Knowing I was too tired to even move.

“Oh am I?”, He asked behind a smile, “Sit up”, he said in a soft way. 

I did, or try to, just sitting enough for him to put one of his shirts on me.

“You are”, I said, enjoying the way the fabric smelled like him.

“Just because you are the best wife”, he leaned down to place a kiss on the tip of my nose. The back of his hand rubbed my cheek. “How are you feeling?”, he asked.

“Like my husband just railed me into the next day”, I joked.

For someone who was whispering such dominant things to my ear he sure blushed easily. I used my own hand to rub his cheek too. That was enough to make him smile.

“But seriously. I am tired”, I complained through a groan.

“Time to sleep then”, He said. 

Again I closed my eyes as he kept doing things. I waited until he layed by my side to hug him My head was burrowing on his side.

“I love you”, the words were barely understandable against his skin, but we had said them so many times before he didn’t need to ask me what I had said.

“I love you too my love”, he said, hugging me back.


	54. Chapter 54

The thing about having a toddler while pregnant is that everything seems harder, but I was dedicated to cherish every moment while Abby was an only child. Everytime I looked into her big hazel eyes I couldn’t help but be so grateful that I had the greatest little girl on earth.

She giggled as she made her way downstairs.

“Careful ab”, I said, holding tightly on the rail as I slowly made my descent. The babies were just about to pop. It was incredible the amount of movement I felt, like they fought for attention all day long. It was a kick to my ribs that made me wince as I took the last step, losing balance.

Thankfully I had enough upper body strength to soften the blow by holding on as my butt made contact with the very last step. The carpet thankfully working as padding. I still freaked though. For a second my eyes grew wide as I looked down in pure terror. Even when the hit wasn’t big this pregnancy was too precious, me and Spencer had been so very careful about everything.

Like they could hear my concerns and wanted to calm me down one of the twins kicked the same place they had kicked before, while the other one kicked the opposite side of my belly. I let out a relieved sigh as I ran my hands through it. 

When Abby, who probably wondered where I was, came back her mouth opened on a perfect o.

“Mommy hurt?”, she asked. She possibly didn’t know the actual implications of a fall during pregnancy, but still worried about her mommy. Which warmed my heart.

“I’m okay sweetheart”, I said, standing up on the ground carefully.

“Mommy fell?”, she said in a higher pitch.

“I slipped”, I explained. Looking at the still shocked toddler.

“Abby”, I called her attention. “We would not tell daddy I fell okay?”, I said.

“Why mommy?”, she asked innocently.

I wondered how bad of an idea was asking the little girl to keep secrets from her father.

“He’ll just worry and get sad”, I said. “So for today and only one time, this is going to be our secret okay?”, I asked her.

“Okay”, she said, shrugging her shoulders as she bounced to the living room. 

I looked at her, hoping she would keep her word. Part of me knew that I probably should at least mention it, but I knew how he got and wasn’t going to risk him freaking out on me.  
As I said, the twins moved so much more than Abby. It served to calm my nerves from the scare. I had also made sure to go to the restroom at least five times and check nothing was going on. 

The twins weren’t even born yet, and Abby was already the best sister in the world. She had asked if her siblings could see movies with her, when Spencer told her the babies cannot see but they can hear, she took it to herself to describe everything she did. Right now that was in the form of singing tunes to the two babies inside of me.

She was just a tone deaf as her dad, granted, but it was so adorable to see her sing to my exposed belly as I took a very small break on the couch.

“Hi guys!”, Spencer surprised us both, who didn’t even hear the door open.

“Daddy”, She said excitedly, standing on the couch and launching at his arms when he opened them for her.

“Hi my little angel”, he said kissing her cheek and hugging her.

“Hi”, I smiled not moving from my place, instead puckering my lips up at him.

“Hello”, he said, leaning down to place a kiss on my lips. “How are you doing?”, he asked.

“Daddy!”, Abby interrupted.

“What’s going on princess?”, he asked, looking at her.

“Kiss for brother and kiss for sister”, she reminded him, putting one finger up for each of her siblings.

“Oh! How could I forget? I’m so sorry”, He said, leaning down again. Balancing himself with one arm on the couch he placed two small kisses on the exposed skin.

“Did all the kids behave today?”, he asked now, sitting next to me.

“They did, angels, all three of them”, I nodded with a smile. Which made him chuckle.

“Did mommy behave today?”, he turned to see the kid on his lap.

“Uhmmmm”, she said thinking, I silently begged her not to say anything. “Mommy had chocolate”, she said.

“Well, I think mommy deserves some chocolate”, he said.

“No daddy! She said one chocolate half for Abby half for mommy” the kid frowned.

“Did she eat it all?”, he asked through a small smile.

“Yeah”, she said still frowning as she nodded.

I looked innocently at them when they turned to face me.

“I also didn’t make dinner”, I said apologetically.

“No worries”, he said, with a smile as he looked down on my belly. “What do you say my two girls relax on the couch while I spoil both of you tonight?”, he asked.

“Are you feeding us grapes?”, I asked jokingly.

“Well of course!”, he said in a giggle.

“Daddy”, Abby tugged on his tie. 

“Yeah baby?”he said, turning to see her.

“I want chocolate”, she said.

“We can have a little chocolate”, he assured her.

The kid then leaned and whispered in his ear. “None for mommy”, she said, and it was loud enough for me to hear.

Spencer laughed freely now, kissing her cheek.

“Can the babies have chocolate?”, he asked.

Abby seemed to consider it for a second before nodding her head. 

I was kidding a little when I asked him if he would hand feed us grapes, but he wasn’t. When he finished he had made the best quesadillas I had in my life, possibly because he knew how much this babies seemed to like Spicy foods and I was eight months pregnant. When I had tried to reach the plate he refused, feeding me as I ate through the whole thing. Abby going for the milder choice of sauce as she watched some tv show. 

“I think I’m keeping you even after the pregnancy”, I joked, hugging myself closer to him. We had finished the apple crisp he had so kindly made  
“Oh thank you”, he smiled proudly, placing a kiss on my forehead.

“I want more”, Abby said, giving us a big yawn. “More apples daddy”, she finished.

I eyed him as he looked at her with his eyebrows furrowed.

“I think what you need is to sleep.”, he said.

“No daddy, M’not tire”, she said, but her eyes seem to be struggling to keep open.

“Uh, what do you say you and I go to your room and I read you a story?”, he said instead.

“Not tire”, she shook her head again.

“But I am”, he faked yawning, making the girl yawn as well.

“Okay daddy”, she finally gave in.

He looked at me. “Go, I’ll clean everything”

“I thought I said I was taking care of everything”, he complained.

“Go”, I chuckled, shoveling him away from me.

With a final unsure glance he stood up, picking the girl up as he made his way upstairs. 

It took me very little time to clean up, Spencer was a lot less messy than I was when cooking. I made sure to turn all the lights off before making my way up.

I opened the door to the girl’s room slowly, trying to make as little noise as possible. Abby was nursing on her bottle as Spencer read her a book. I soaked in the image of the girl with her head on his shoulder as he made another animal noise. They both looked up at me, but were too immersed in their world to say anything. I just blew them a kiss, not wanting to burst the bubble as I made my way down. Laying on the bed and closing my eyes. 

A couple of minutes later Spencer’s hurried pace startled me awake.

“Spencer”, I reprimanded, bringing a hand to my heart which was beating faster.

“You fell down the stairs?”, he said in an angry tone.

Oh… Oh..

“I didn’t fall”, I quickly corrected before his brain continued picturing whatever he was picturing.

“Abby said you fell down the stairs.”, he said, walking towards me. “Let’s go”

“Let’s go where?”, I asked in confusion.

“We are going to the hospital”, he explained.

“We are not going to the hospital, Spencer I slipped on the last step. I didn’t even fall I just sat on the stairs”, I explained.

“But you could be hurt and the babies-”

“The babies are fine”, I said, his hand which he was extending to help me stand up was still extended. I took it, pressing it against my belly.

“Have they been moving?”, he asked, still with terror in his face.

I couldn’t blame him, so instead I sat straight, pulling him until he sat next to me.

“They have love, they have been moving like nothing happened, because nothing did. We are fine”, I soothed, hugging him to me.

“You should have told me”, he still complained.

“I know, I know I’m sorry, I should have said something, but I didn’t want to worry you”, I said, kissing his head.

“I always worry, always”, he said. His eyes were now soft when he looked at me.

“I know my love, which is why I love you so much”, I said. “What did Abby tell you?”, I asked, wanting to know what broke the promise of a secret.

“When you left she told me to shush for a second, I was confused but she explained she wanted to make sure you made it down the stairs safely. She looked mortified when she let it slip”, he chuckled lightly, cupping my face.

I couldn’t help but have tears flood my eyes.

“We have the best little girl on the planet don’t we?”, I sobbed. Just by thinking that my little girl was worried about me.

“We really do”, he said in the softest of manners as he placed an equally soft kiss on my lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to upload this yesterday on Daughter's day in honor of our favorite Reid, but I forgot lol Sorry!
> 
> Also! IMPORTANT there are only three chapters left to this story, I already wrote the ending and loved it so I think it's time for me to end it! BUT the story is far from done, there are so many one shots ideas that I have for this fic. If you guys would like to read them of course.
> 
> Thank you guys for your support on this series it has meant the world to me


	55. Chapter 55

I stirred awake by the hand on my shoulder.

“Mhhhhhhmmm”, I dragged a hum as I tried to move, just sending a horrible cramp down my spine.

“Hey hey there”, Spencer said soothingly, bringing his hand to cup my face.

I blinked a couple of times before finally seeing him clearly.

“Hi”, I groaned, stretching just a little.

“Did you get another cramp?”, he asked worriedly.

“Don’t worry I’m fine”, I yawned, extending my hand for him to help me sit up. He placed his arms around me doing exactly that.

“Are you sure I don’t want to…”

“C’mon Spencer I’m fine”, I said, sending him a tired smile.

“I don’t know if I should go, the drive to Quantico is-”

“I know love, the same commute as you do twice a day. These two are going to stay here for a little bit more”, I said, patting my belly.

He winced slightly at the sound, although he knew I had not used any force whatsoever.

“You know what they want?”, I said, in a conspiratorial tone.

“What?”, he said, slightly wide eyed and ready to comply with anything I would ask.

“For their daddy to give me a kiss and take their sister trick or treating like he promised”, i smiled.

He rolled his eyes slightly before leaning down carefully. When he was at arm’s reach I pulled him towards me grabbing a hold of the red suit.

The kiss was tender and slightly chaste, interrupted by another cramp. As I sucked my lips in he looked concerned.

“(y/n)...”, he started.

“Love I’m okay I promise, you need to take her”, I said.  
The FBI had planned a trick or treat slash kids friendly haunted house on their HQ’s the night before halloween, most units were participating, and the kids were very excited to go where their parents worked, which for the parents wasn’t the most exciting idea of course. But it was a safe, fun way to enjoy halloween, besides Penelope and Emily had been talking so much about how good the BAU’s part was. 

I wanted to join in, really did, but eight months pregnant, and just two weeks shy from my scheduled C-Section I wasn’t really in any physical shape to walk around a building full of kids for two hours.

“Daddy Daddy”, the girl came in bouncing on her feet into the living room where I had been napping.

“There it is!”, I chirped in, very excited to see the final result of the costume. “Well it’s Alice!”, I said.

Abby looked beyond adorable in her Alice from Alice in Wonderland costume. The girl spun on her heels, showing us the full costume.

Spencer slightly furrowed his brows.

“She got that from you”, he said.

“Shush”, I waved him off with my hand as I beckoned the girl over.

“You are going to be the cutest little girl in the whole place”, I said, fixing the black bow on her head.

“Why is sister and brother not coming?”, She asked, fidgeting with the fabric of the skirt.

“Well baby, they need to get lots and lots of sleep because they are going to be here very soon”

“Here”, she said, pointing down.

“Oh yeah, we are so close to meeting them finally”, I said, unable to hide the pure joy in my voice.

“TOmorrow?”, she asked.

“No not tomorrow”, I chuckled.

“Are they going to be here for Christmas mommy, my birthday’s on Christmas”, she said, like we needed a reminder for that.

“Well baby they are going to be here sooner than Christmas”, I said. 

The smile that formed on her lips made my heart double in size, the little girl looking up to her dad for him to confirm this information.

He nodded before crouching on the floor.

“Yeah, we’ll have you brother and sister here very soon”, he smiled, hugging the little girl. “And you are going to be the best big sister in the whole world isn’t that right my love?”, he said, kissing the side of her head as she nodded happily.

“Okay guys, I think you should get going”, I said, starting to stand up.

“No, you stay there”, Spencer said, rejecting my hand that was seeking something to prop myself up with. “I got you tea, and waters, and chips”, he said pointing at the table. “We also have the bucket outside with the candy, so not opening the door to trick or treaters either”, he said.

I pouted dramatically at him.

“No whining”, he said.

I scowled at him and my lost battle.

“No whining mommy”, Abby repeated, which made me laugh a little.

“I’m only whining because your dad is not ready yet”, I said.

The man sighed as he grabbed the hat with the attached wig from the table. He placed it in his head slightly reluctantly.

Abby and I both clapped excitedly.

“Now Mad Hatter, and Alice can go get mommy the good candy”, I said.

Spencer rolled his eyes slightly before someone knocked on the door.

I was about to say they were probably trick or treaters that were early but Spencer walked to open it anyway.

“Hey”, I heard a voice say.

“Hey!”, I heard someone who I recognized immediately as Rossi answer.

“Rossi”, the girl yelled happily.

“Rossi?”, I turned to see the man walking into the living room with a bag in hand. “What are you doing here?”, I smiled.

“Well, Spencer told me that you were not coming to the FBI halloween night, so I have decided to bring Halloween to you”, he said dangling the bag in front of me.

“What…?”, I asked confusedly.

“I have movies, and pumpkin pie and we are ordering pizza and we are staying in and having a great night”, he said.

Through the corner of my eye I saw Spencer smile, a smile that told me this could be in part his idea.

“Oh Rossi, you don’t want to spend the night with a very pregnant lady”, I chuckled, grateful to see him though.

“I believe I do! You are always the best company”, he said with a bright smile.

“Now, you little Alice”, he said turning to the girl and tickling and tummy. “And you…?”

“Mad hatter”, Spencer deadpanned.

“Mad hatter”, he confirmed. “Need to go”

“Okay”, Spencer sighed.

I was distracted by the pumpkin pie on the canvas bag but still heard when Spencer whispered.

“Let me know if anything happens, she’s been cramping but you know how stubborn she gets.”, he said.

“Oh I know”, Rossi reassured him.

“You two are so lucky I can’t get up from this couch”, I narrowed my eyes at them.

Rossi laughed at that.

“Okay we are leaving, I love you”, he said.

“Bye, bye Abby I love you so much baby”, I said waving to her as she waved excitedly.

“So, want to start our night with some horror movie?”, he asked.

I nodded my head excitedly.

I loved spending time with Rossi, not only was he a great person but he was so fun to be around. The thing is, no matter how fun you are, in this stage of pregnancy I couldn’t focus on anything for more than thirty minutes before falling asleep.

When Frankenstein started playing and the pumpkin pie started disappearing I started drifting, not waking up until a while later with a severe pain on my pelvis.

“Ouch ouch ouch ouch”, I said, breathing heavily as I tried to sit up.

Rossi helped me with that with so much concern on his face.

“(y/n), everything okay kiddo?”, he asked, checking to see if there was anything physically hurting me on the couch.

“Ouch Rossi”, I winced, squeezing his hand on mine.

“Hey hey, talk to me”, he said, calling my attention.

“Rossi the babies”, that’s all I could manage.

The trip to the hospital was a complete blur, with the deafening pain and the fear I couldn’t even think straight. The orderly was already waiting for us with a wheelchair when we got to the hospital, Rossi having called everyone that needed to be called. DR Arya ready for me inside, the only person who was missing was the father of these two kids.

“Where’s Spencer”, I cried as they helped me in the wheelchair.

“He’s coming, he’s coming, he should be here any minute”

“Rossi”, I cried.

“I’ve got you, trust me I’ve got you”, he said as they started pushing me in.

I could barely concentrate from the horrible pressure I felt in my pelvic bone, and then, nothing.

“Dr Arya”, I said, the fear evident in my voice. They had been running tests for like what seemed to be forever.

“We are okay sweetie”, she said, pointing at the monitor with three heartbeats.

“What’s happening”, It was Spencer who slammed through the door.

Tears of relief left my eyes now.

“Spencer”, I cried.

“What’s happening, how are the babies, how is she?”, he looked around for answers.

“Both babies and (y/n) are doing good”, Dr Arya reassured him.

“What happened”, he asked.

“The boy dropped a little”, she explained.

“What do you mean?”

“It means that he is ready to come out”, she said.

“Today?”, we both almost yelled.

“Yes, dilation is happening at a normal pace, but from the position of the little guy we won’t be able to perform a c section”, she said.

Now that was scary.

“Wait no”, I said, this probably was information they had given me before he got here but I couldn’t listen through my crying and yelling.

“Look, you came to us fast enough and we'll be able to give you the epidural, as well as other drugs to help you”, she reassured.

“Nononononon”, I said quickly, before being interrupted with another bad pain, or well contraction. This one passed quicker

“Everything is going to be fine”, she said.

I looked up at Spencer who was as pale as the white scrubs they had made him wear before walking in.  
I don’t know how I forgot the pain. Because this pain seemed almost impossible to forget, even with the epidural and other cocktails I felt like I was about to pass out.

“You are doing great Mama, one more push, c’mon one more push”, I heard someone say to my left. 

As I squeezed Spencer’s hand so hard I was sure he’ll need his own hospital room afterwards.

“You are doing great, we are almost there, one more”, I heard someone else say.

With all the strength I had left I screamed as I propped myself off the bed. Then the relief came.

And the high pitched wail. My eyes flooded with tears.

“We have a little girl”, I heard a nurse say, calling over Spencer for him to help cut the cord. 

Before I could look up to where the crying was coming the pain came again.

“Okay we have an eager boy over here”, The doctor said.

“Let’s do this”, the nurse came back to my side.

I still could hear my little girl crying somewhere in the room, as the second wave of everything came.

This time, whether it be from the drugs or because there was an open path. It felt slightly less horrible. The baby boy came out in what felt like a couple of seconds, but was probably a lot more than that.

My head dropped on the bed as everyone around me got to work. Spencer walked slightly away before coming back to my side. The room filled with feet shuffling and two very loud cries.

“Our babies”, I sobbed.

“Our babies”, Spencer said. He brushed the hairs away from my damp forehead before he helped a nurse sit me down.

“Okay here they come, if you put your arms like this you might be able to get them both.”, a nurse got my attention, showing me the way that my arms should be before they deposited two tiny humans in them.

“Spencer”, I cried fully now, looking down at them. “Look”, I sniffled.

“I am, I am they are perfect (y/n)”, he said, kissing the side of my head as we watched the two very little humans look around for the very first time in their lives. They both looked so similar right now, a head full of hair a big hazely brown eyes,

We listened, or try to, as Dr Arya gave us numbers, the girl was just a little bit smaller than the boy, but both of them were smaller than Abby had been.

It took Spencer a second to decide who he wanted to hold first, the people around us doing their job but we were too busy falling in love by the two little creatures that the spookiest night of the year had given us.

“Are you sure we are not naming them Jack and Sally?”, he asked.

I shook my head with a weak chuckle as the boy got comfortable in my arms, the girl already finding her home in Spencer’s.

“And to think Abby was this little, or at least similarly small”, he sobbed, softly caressing the girl’s face with his knuckle.

“Hi little one, it’s me, I’m your dad”, he sobbed. “We are going to have so many adventures, and you are going to be so very loved.”, he said.

I was crying again in no time. As he leaned down to repeat the words to our little guy.

“Mrs Reid, Dr Reid”, a nurse called our attention, pulling us away from the babies for the first time.

“You have names yet?”, she asked.

We each smiled brightly looking down at them.

We took a little alone time when the room cleared, trying to juggle the babies so they could both get some food. Which they demanded in the form of heartbreaking cries. It was incredible how such a noise could make me so happy, I swore I could distinguish that sound anywhere in the world now that I knew them. Some adjusting, and a bottle later they were both sleeping, wiggling in our arms.

“They look so tiny and delicate”, I said, the little girl having a hold of my finger as her face scrunched up.

We both looked up when the soft knocking came, a very tired looking Rossi with a sleeping Abby in his arms.

No wonder why, the twins had decided to pop out at three AM on October 31st. Way beyond any human’s regular sleep time.

“Hey”, he said softly.

“Hi”, I smiled. He got closer, looking at the babies, his eyes filling with tears.

“Oh my”, he whispered. “They are so precious”, he said.

“Right?”, Spencer asked, the tears coming back to his eyes. “Thank you Rossi”, he said, looking at the man.

“Don’t even mention it”, he said.

“Thank you, for real”, I whispered.

“Anything for you kiddo, you look beautiful by the way”.

I chuckled it away, I probably looked like a zombie right now, but I couldn’t care less.

“Also thank you for staying, we wanted you to be the first one to meet them”, Spencer said.

Rossi was still looking at the babies.

“Rossi, this right here is Sophia Rose Reid”, I said, uncovering the little girl just enough for him to see it.

“Oh”, his expression softened. “That is such a beautiful name for a beautiful little girl”, he said. I could hear how he was choking a little.

“And this”, Spencer said, carefully sitting next to me, so that the man could see the boy just as good. His arms were still full with our older daughter sleeping unaware.

“This is Stephen Anthony Reid”, Spencer said.

We both looked up as the man’s jaw hung slightly open.

“Stephen…? Is he…”

“He is named after the best grandpa anyone could ask for”, I confirmed, nodding my head.  
Now he joined in the happy crying as he watched the little boy.

“Oh…”, is all he could say. “May I..?”

“Yeah, put Abby here on my side”, I said, already missing my other little girl, who looked no so little right now. 

“Easy”, Spencer said, helping him a little as the girl fell softly on the bed, her head on my lap.

I saw as they passed the little boy from one set of arms to another, Spencer, missing the feeling already turned to get his little girl now. I gave her to him, my hands traveling to Abby who was starting to stir awake.

“Mommy”, she said, looking at me with so much confusion.

“Hi my little sleeping beauty”, I teased, immediately accepting her in my arms, it didn’t matter how I felt my body protest, I needed to have her there. “Where are we?”, she whispered with furrowed eyebrows, her eyes growing as she looked around. Then, in a very smart moment she looked down on my body, noticing the lack of something. “Daddy?”, she asked, always going to her father for answers, and noticing the new person occupying the arms that she had laid claim on years ago.

“Abigail Diane Reid, we want you to meet your little brother and sister”, he said, his voice breaking as tears falling as he watched the wide smile on our girl’s mouth.

“I knew they were coming tomorrow!”, she announced victoriously.

We all chuckled as she crashed in my arms happily, inspecting the two little people when the men got closer for her to see.

When the drugs wore out I was as good as dead. Falling asleep so quickly. All of the nurses and doctors, and even Rossi weren’t so sure about leaving the toddler with us tonight, but I needed her here. Besides we knew our angel better than anyone else.

“Do you think we all fit in this bed?”, I said through a yawn.

“No way, Me and Abby are taking the futon”, he said.

I pouted up at him.

“Just because you look extremely adorable doesn’t mean you’ll get what you want”, he said, poking my nose with his finger.

“Well, there are three people in this room who will get you to do anything by being adorable”, I fakely complained. 

The smile on Spencer’s face was the warmest, most amazing thing I have ever seen. As we both watched the girl who was in awe looking at the two bassinets.

After that I lost consciousness. The last thing my brain registered was the sight of Spencer sitting in a chair with Abby in his lap as they both watched intently the twins sleeping. If my life had been a dream up to this point I didn’t want anyone to ever wake me up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So!!!! This is it folks! this is the last "chapter"
> 
> The next update will be an epilogue some time in the future.
> 
> As I said before, thank you guys for reading, supporting and liking this fic. This is my longest fic ever, and I was terrified when I started it, but now there is no way I could leave this story. As I said I am planning on doing longer one chapter continuations of this story, and I already have some ideas of snippets I'll like to see, so if anyone has some feel free to request.
> 
> A million thanks!


	56. Chapter 56

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I cry writing this? Yes I did.
> 
> Words cannot begin to explain how thankful I am for your support in this project. Every comment every kudo every read brought me so much happiness even when I was not having the best of days. Millions of thanks.
> 
> As I said, I am not able to bring myself to leave this beautiful family, and there are stories I want to tell. So if you want please add the series of subscribe so you can know when I upload the one shots. Also, really if there is anything you want to see, or a prompt please let me know and I'll happily make it happen.
> 
> Excuse me now while I go cry for a week <3!

A soft thud coming from upstairs made my head jerk up. The thing is, four years ago I would have run upstairs. It’s not that I cared less about the twins, it’s just a mother thing, with the first one you are overprotective, and scared about everything. Then after the second one you start to recognize certain things, like the fact that the sound was too soft for me to worry. I continued with the breakfast as soon as I heard the tiny footsteps along the carpet over me. 

Someone who always worried, regardless, was my husband. Spencer came out of the room putting his tie on and narrowing his eyes at me, making a visual count of the people in the kitchen.

“Hurricane Steve”, I explained, scrambling the eggs on the pan. 

“I figured”, he joked.

That boy was a carbon copy of him, but personality wise he was all me. Stephen was the sweetest boy, always smiling and making people smile. He was all a mommy’s boy and that was in part my fault. I mean, those hazel eyes that shined every moment of every waking hour had won over my heart in seconds. He loved his dad too though, and his sisters, as a matter of fact he loved everyone and everything. Now, the boy knew how to get in trouble. His favorite words were why and how, and if he didn’t get a satisfactory answer he would go and see how things worked himself. 

“Daddy”, Abby said, coming down the stairs and running to his arms. He didn’t even need to react, his body was already picking the girl up and perching her to his side. I couldn’t help but feel some nostalgia. Abby had gotten so big and tall now. She was still a kid but I couldn’t help but feel like she grew up faster than I wanted her to, Sometimes it felt like she had grown in Spencer’s arms overnight. Of course by the way Spencer kissed her cheek as they hugged each other reminded me that no matter how she would always be our little girl. 

“You didn’t happen to see what your brother was doing right?”, he asked her, hugging her close to him. 

“No”, she shook her head.

Spencer sighed as we both heard another thud.

“Let’s investigate”, he shook his head lightly as he turned around to walk upstairs.

I looked down at the little girl on my arms. Sophie lazily had her head against my chest. I would never admit it, but even with her, who was the one who weighed less out of the three, I had to start getting more arm days in order to keep her in my arms for long periods of time. I refused to put her down though.

Sophie, although a carbon copy of myself, had Spencer’s personality. It started with little things, she took longer to start speaking, she complained about people holding her too much. Even as a baby she was quiet, which had worried me slightly. It worried Spencer too, he wouldn’t admit it but I could tell. He ,the always observant, took special note on how the girl reacted to certain things. But my baby girl was the image of innocence, and we loved her so much. She clinged to us in a way that moved me to tears every day, and although she loved us her favorite person in the world right now was her big sister. 

Both the twins loved Abby, and with good reason. Abby hadn’t changed a bit personality wise. JJ liked to call her the perfect swirl of Spencer and I. She was as sweet as honey, and as quick as a whipe. With a father like Spencer it was kind of determined that the three of them would have a love of books, but as soon as Abby learned to read she seemed to want to catch up with the years of reading Spencer had done. She had been such a great support, and I wanted to think up to this point we had given her a life she deserved. In our eyes she deserved the world. Of course even after all this time she was a daddy’s girl through and through. 

When the three of them came down Abby held Stephen’s hand as they walked to the table. The little boy looked adorable in his uniform, his little burgundy tie crooked to the same direction his dad’s was, which to a point seemed incredible, I had dressed him up not even ten minutes ago. 

Spencer walked behind them.

“What were you doing?”, I asked softly, when Abby smiled at me before walking to the table, and Stephen rubbed his eyes now next to me.

“I don’t wanna go mommy”, he complained through a yawn.

“He was building a fort”, Spencer explained, picking the little boy up and kissing his cheek.

“I don’t wanna go daddy”, he complained now to his father, testing his luck with the man.

“You need to go to school champ”, he said. “You know you have to go”

The kid hugged himself closer to him now.

“But I’m tired daddy look”, he said, yawning again.

“Well, you see love, after today you have two days free, and you won’t need to go to school then.”, he said.

“Never ever?”, the kid perked up.

Spencer and I exchanged a look, unable to tell him right now that every monday for the rest of his life he’ll have to start a new week.

“You know, tomorrow’s is your cousin Jack’s birthday party”, I reminded him. 

Spencer could have all the logic but I had all the bribing.

He seemed happy to hear that, retreating his lazy position and bouncing on his dad’s arms.

I smiled victoriously.

Spencer put the kid down who ran to the table, sitting close to his sister.

“Good morning Sophia, how are you”, he asked the little girl, walking to the side she was on.

The girl looked up at him before burying her head on my shoulder.

“I see everyone woke up lazy today, can I hold you my little girl?” he asked for permission.

This was one of the reasons I knew I didn’t need to worry with her. Spencer was so acquainted with the way she behaved that he knew what to do. Sophie too appreciated the little things that let her know she’ll always be safe. All four of us respected her boundaries just as much as we respected everyone else’s.

She nodded her head as she extended her arms to him.

He took her, hugging her close and swaying softly as he looked at me.

I smiled up at him, taking one of the mugs that were next to me on the counter and handing it to him.

“Thank you”, he accepted it softly. “You need help?”

“Nope, I’m done, go take a seat”, I said, standing on my toes and placing a kiss on his lips, which he accepted with a bright smile.

  
  


I walked a couple of times, bringing stuff from the stove to the table. Then taking my seat opposite from Spencer’s.

“Thank you mommy”, Spencer said, as a reminder.

“Thank you mommy”, the three kids said in unison.

“At what time is Jack’s party?”, Spencer asked as everyone started eating.

“Three”, I said.

Spencer and Abby exchanged a look I was too familiar with.

“What are you two planning?”, I asked.

Abby looked innocently down at her plate as Spencer smiled.

“We are going to the bookstore in the morning.”, he explained.

I nodded my head. “Just make sure you are here on time”, I smiled at him.

God he was perfect.

We had decided very early that each of our kids was going to have the opportunity to be its own person. So, every now and again one of us would take individual time with one of them so that they could explore whatever they were interested in that week. No matter how quirky, like Sophie’s obsession with manta rays for a while, which took us to the aquarium more than once.

Breakfast was over quickly.

“Okay kids, brush your teeth, tidy your rooms and come back down okay?”, Spencer said, standing up to pick the table.

I stood up and walked to the lunch boxes that were out on the counter.

“Yes daddy”, they said, running upstairs.

“Do you think Steve will go back to sleep?”, I asked through a chuckle.

“Honestly he might”, Spencer said looking over the counter as he bended to load the dishwasher.

I started fixing the five lunches in different bags.

I had told Spencer when the twins started growing that I would like to work again. Part of it was so that I could hopefully be Sophie’s kindergarten teacher, which I hoped would make the transition easier. Part of it was because I wouldn’t be able to stay alone without my babies at home. I would go crazy. 

Things had worked though, and I had gotten my job back. It just happened that the teacher who had taken my place had decided to retire leaving the vacancy. It seemed kismet. 

“What are you thinking”Spencer said, hugging me from behind as I zipped the last box.

“How lucky I am to have this family”, I said casually.

Spencer didn’t take it casually. His arms pulling me closer to him, burying his head on the back of my neck.

After eight years I was crazy about this man just like I had been on day one. He placed kisses on my neck as I rolled my head to give him access.

“You know, we can expand a little more”, he said in a coaxing tone. “I wouldn’t mind repeating what we did in the shower today a couple of times”, he purred in my ear.

Even after all this time his breath sent shivers down my spine.

I would be lying if I said I never thought about baby number four, I mean with the way the other three had come out he just seemed to be giving me perfect kids. Still I was unsure.

“Last time we took that gamble we ended with the two in one”, I joked.

“Well, we’ll just have to look at the odds”, he smiled.

“I’ll think about it”, I said turning to him.

His eyes lit up, but I knew they weren’t from my words. His eyes lit up in the same way mine did when I looked at him.

“What are you thinking”, I asked now, looking into his eyes after a second of silence.

“About how beautiful you look”, he said.

I rolled my eyes playfully.

“I’m serious, you look stunning”, he insisted.

To be honest I did feel confident, which after three kids is something you kind of have to earn. I had a black skater skirt with a pink turtleneck on. Still I rolled my eyes playfully. If anyone looked stunning it was him. Spencer had aged gracefully into his dad life. A while ago he had decided on an specific hair length, and although he couldn’t grow a full beard he had let his stubble grow out a bit.

He kissed my lips softly, rubbing his nose against mine in the most delicate way.

“I lo-”

His words were interrupted by the stampede of kids lining up in front of us.

He smiled down at them. Crouching on the floor he handed each of them lunch boxes, checking and fixing their uniforms. He even fixed Stephen’s tie which seemed ironic since he was equally crooked.

“Okay kids time to go”, I said.

The five of us walked outside.

“Everyone give daddy a goodbye kiss”, I remembered, but I knew I didn’t need to remind them of that. 

  
Spencer helped me fasten everyone in their seats, kissing their cheeks as he went.

He was holding himself gracefully when this Monday he had cried his eyes out at the twin’s first day of school. I thought I was the crier of the two, but years ago when Abby had her first day he had cried all night. Going as far as considering homeschooling her.

Once he was done I handed him his own lunch and his coffee mug. He pulled me in a hug. 

“I love you Mrs Reid”, he said.

“I love you Doctor Reid”, I smiled, accepting his lips on mine before we parted our separate ways.

  
  
  
  
  
  


I walked around the classroom, looking down at the different artwork the kids were working on. When I approached Sophie’s table I smiled trying to avoid looking too excited at the way she and the other girl were sharing crayons. Who surprised me was Steve, who was perched on my side. It wasn’t nepotism, I picked all the kids up from time to time. Right now my little boy was just extra clingy and I wasn’t about to decline holding him.

“You want to paint with your sister?”, I whispered at him.

He seemed to consider it for a moment before nodding his head.

“You need to ask them okay?”, I said, putting him on the floor and watching him walk to the table with the two girls.

“Can I paint here?”, he asked sweetly.

“Yes”, the other girl smiled.

Sophie nodded her head with a smile, making way for her brother to start doodling in the big piece of paper.

The phone rang in that moment, pulling me back to work mode as I walked to the desk.

“(y/n)”, I said into the receiver.

“Hey! Eric Soo is ready to go home”, Lilian said.

“On my way”, I confirmed, looking at my assistant who was too busy with a table. 

I sent her a signal letting her know I was going out and walked to gather the kid.

I made sure to let my own babies know I was going to be right back as I picked the kid up and took him to the front.

His mom smiled as she accepted him in her arms. We had a brief conversation about how he did before she bid her goodbyes.

In that moment my lips formed a bright smile as I spotted the man walking in.

“What are you doing here?”, I asked.

“Well, we finished work early, and I decided to come here”, he said. “I thought I’ll bring this to my kid’s teacher and see if I could ask her out for dinner and a movie tonight?”

I resisted smiling even more. As he showed me the vase with the rainbow flowers he had on his hands.

“I can ask Mr James to come to the front if you want”, I joked.

Mr James was Abby’s teacher this year.

He chuckled, blushing a little.

How could he make me feel this way after all these years?

“The other teacher”, he clarified. I accepted the bouquet, biting my lip as I fought myself not to launch into his arms.

“Well, Doctor Reid, I really appreciate it, but I don’t date parents”, I said. 

“Oh”, He faked looking disappointed.

“Besides I have three kids”, I continued.

“I like kids”, he nodded. “Are they good?”

“God no, they are terrible”, I continued joking.

He laughed after that, unable to keep the game.

“Dinner and a movie sounds wonderful baby”, I nodded my head.

His expression softened. We stood there looking at each other.

“I gotta go back”, I said in an apologetic manner.

“I know”, he nodded.

“Abby has like thirty minutes of school and the twins like an hour”, I said.

“I know”, he nodded again, with a bright smile and slightly tilted head.

“What are you gonna do to kill the time”, I asked, about to tell him about the coffee shop across the street.

“What I did before meeting you”, he said casually.

I narrowed my eyes slightly.

“Which is?”, I asked curiously.

“Wait for you”, he said.

I looked at the floor quickly, trying not to blush too much at his words. He seemed proud of my reaction.

“Do that, also buy the tickets”, I replied, in a soft manner and low voice.

Still with a proud smile he took a step closer, guiding my face up to him by my chin and giving me a soft appropriate kiss, nothing like we actually wanted to kiss each other,

“I love you”, I whispered.

“I love you (y/n)”, he said with a smile. “Goodbye Lilian”, he waved goodbye to the woman as he almost skipped while making his way out. The woman waved goodbye at him.

I was left standing there with a sigh in my mouth and hands full of roses.

Lilian, who had been helping a parent and was now free turned to see me.

“Wherever you got him from, you should let me know”, she joked.

I walked around.

“I think there’s only one out there”, I said proudly.

“To think we were about to have him arrested in this same place eight years ago”, she joked.

But there was some nostalgia to her words. Right now I felt so full of happiness, all the anger and the drama and the sadness seemed like a lifetime ago. Almost like it didn’t happen to us. 

I laughed at her words as I walked by to the classroom. 

Once there I placed the vase on the desk, taking the note out.

There were only twelve words but I brought them to my chest. Twelve little words against the thousands we had spoke to one another. All my life before knowing the warmth of Spencer Reid seemed the life of someone else, someone who I was never supposed to be.

I smiled, reading the note again and again, not to memorize them but to cherish them.

  
  


_ “My sweet girl,  _

_ I love you so much _

_ Yours always, Doctor Reid.” _

  
  



End file.
